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Title: Best of Both Worlds
Pairing: Hannibal Lecter/Will Graham
Author's Note: Sequel to "Trying New Things."
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Hannibal Lecter or Will Graham, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue. b
***Will took a deep breath, looking around the foyer of Hannibal's house.
It was hard to believe that as of today, he lived here. Oh, he still had his house in Wolf Trap, and a lot of his belongings were still there. But from now on, this was his home.
He could still call Wolf Trap home, too. He and Hannibal would go there on the weekends, and maybe even for a night during the week here and there. It was a good place to get away to.
But for all intents and purposes, he lived here in Baltimore now. Hannibal had even accepted the dogs into his home, though Will was sure that he'd done so reluctantly. It was amazing what his boyfriend had decided that he could put up with to have Will living here.
It didn't seem possible that all of this had happened so quickly. Just two weeks, and he was here, a resident of this house that had always seemed to beckon to him.
He'd always liked this house, liked the comfortable feel of it. He would have thought that Hannibal's home would feel cold and sterile to him, but it didn't.
For some reason, this house had always felt warm and welcoming.
Maybe it was just because of the feelings that he had for the man who lived here, he reflected. Maybe he just found the house welcoming to him because Hannibal was.
But he hadn't always felt that way, had he? Will's brow furrowed as he thought back, remembering how nervous he'd felt the first few times he'd come here. He had even had that nervous, jumpy feeling on the night that Hannibal had first indicated that he was interested in Will as more than a patient.
Or had that nervousness only come about because he had felt the same way, and he had been afraid to show it, and afraid to let Hannibal into his life so intimately?
Yes, that had to be it. He'd been overwhelmed by his fears then.
But there was no more fear, not now. He'd pushed all of that aside, and opened his arms and his heart to Hannibal. He had no reason to be afraid now.
Of course, he hadn't had any reason to be afraid then. He'd only been afraid of the unknown, of the new experiences that had been waiting for him.
He had successfully leapt the abyss where those fears dwelt, and now, he could feel sorry for the person he had been before Hannibal had come into his life as both his friend and his lover. He had been so afraid of so much, always holding himself back, never letting himself truly experience life.
He was a different person now. Being involved with Hannibal had made him more confident, brought him out of that self-imposed shell he'd always kept carefully constructed around himself.
That shell still existed, of course. He hadn't broken out of it completely. He still didn't trust many people, and he still wasn't comfortable in most social situations.
Most? he thought with an inward snort. Make that all.
That was something he'd have to get past, he told himself with a sigh. Hannibal gave parties; as Hannibal's significant other, he'd be expected to attend them all.
Except when he was working, of course, and he would probably be doing a lot of that. It felt as though the cases Jack was getting had been stepped up -- or maybe it was just that the Chesapeake Ripper was inspiring a lot of other serial killers to come out and display their work.
That thought sent a shiver down his spine. He didn't want to think that they would have to deal with even more killers. The ones already on their agenda were bad enough.
He would be closer to them now, really. A lot of the killings that he dealt with seemed to take place around Baltimore, much more than they did around Wolf Trap.
And he wouldn't be so isolated any more, which most people would see as a good thing, Will told himself. It was odd to feel that he'd given up a part of his privacy, but he wasn't going to let himself focus on that. He was losing something, yes, but he was gaining so much more.
What was giving up a little privacy, when he compared it to being here, spending every night with the man he'd fallen in love with? Wasn't giving up a little isolation a very small price to pay?
That was part of life. Compromise, a little bit of give and take.
He was gaining so much more than he was losing, really. After all, it wasn't as though he didn't still have his house in Wolf Trap. He could go there any time he wanted to.
He just wasn't living in that house on a daily basis now. But he would still be there at least one day of the week, and on the weekends. It was still his getaway, his retreat.
Now, he had something to add to that, another layer that would make the house in Wolf Trap even more precious to him. He was going to share it with Hannibal. They would get some new furniture, do a bit of redecorating to make the house into a place that Hannibal would be more comfortable in.
They could get a bigger bed for his bedroom, maybe add a few other things. But it would essentially still be Will's house. Hannibal had made that perfectly clear.
Yes, they were entwining their lives, sharing more than they ever had. Yet they still had their own private spaces, as well. Moving in with Hannibal wasn't going to take that away from him.
He had the best of both worlds. He was really a very lucky man.
Even though there might be times that he would miss being in Wolf Trap, he couldn't help feeling that he was exactly where he belonged, where he'd always been meant to be.
It was a little scary to realize that he was embarking on the kind of relationship he'd never thought that he would have -- living with a lover on a daily basis. But it was time to take this step, and he'd thought about it a lot. He was doing the right thing -- and more, he was doing what he wanted to do.
For once in his life, he wasn't listening to any of his doubts and fears, or erring on the side of caution. He was making a bold step, listening to his heart instead of his head.
It might turn out to be a mistake, but if it was, then he would learn from it.
It didn't feel like a mistake, though. It felt like a big step, one that he was still a little nervous about, but a step in the right direction. The first step towards the rest of his life.
Most of his belongings that he was moving in here were still in boxes; he would have to start unpacking sometime later in the day, but for the moment, he wanted to sit down and relax for a while.
He wanted to let the fact sink in that he could look at this house as being his home now, that he actually lived here. Even the dogs were starting to settle in; they were outside in the back yard, sniffing around, and he hoped that they would enjoy living here as much as he was sure that he would.
Will didn't doubt that it would take a while to get used to this new phase of his life, but i wasn't as though he'd never faced changes before. He had always been able to adapt fairly well.
He'd do that this time, too. Only this time, he wouldn't be so much adapting as settling in and making sure that he was comfortable with the life that he'd chosen.
So far, he couldn't see any clouds in the happy future that stretched ahead of him.
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