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Title: Grand Passion
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Hannibal Lecter/Will Graham
Fandom: Hannibal
Rating: PG-13
Table: Otherwordly Challenge, tv_universe
Prompt: Aeipathy - An enduring and consuming passion.
Author's Note: Sequel to "The Clock Is Ticking."
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Hannibal Lecter or Will Graham, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.***
His passion for Will wold never fade, never die away.
The passion he felt for his young lover was stronger than anything Hannibal had ever known, or would know. There was nothing more important in his life.
Which was why he intended to try to give up the life he'd been living and make a new life with Will. It was time for him to make an effort to throw off the chains that had held him back from doing so, even though those chains had bound him for years.
Will would never consent to make a life with him as he was, so he either had to give Will up, or be willing to change himself. And losing Will was not an option.
Losing Will would be the end of him.
Somehow, he knew that to be an undeniable truth. If Will decided to turn him in, to put him behind bars, he would survive, yes, but he would be merely a shell, a husk of the man he had been. Without Will in his life, he would cease to exist as he was.
Will ws what gave him strength, brought him happiness. Will Graham had become indispensable in his life, whether he wanted to admit the fact or not.
It felt a bit strange to know that he literally relied on anyone the way he did on Will. He had been so alone for nearly all of his life, relying on no one but himself, suppressing his emotions, that it was a new and almost exhilarating feeling not to be alone any longer.
Now, there was no loneliness. His relationship with Will filled his days and nights; even when his boyfriend wasn't physically with him, he carried Will in his heart.
He'd never expected that. He hadn't thought that any sort of grande passion was for him; he had long since resigned him to knowing that he would never experience the feeling of falling deeply in love, as so many poets wrote about and endless songs celebrated.
That aeipathy, that enduing and consuming passion.
He had often read about it, and wonder if it was possible to find that sort of passion for himself, but he had always reluctantly acknowledge that it wasn't for him.
Then Will Graham burst into his life, like an angel with fiery wings, an angel who had captured his senses from the first moment he had gazed into those intensely blue eyes. Will was like a comet on his horizon, one that burned brightly, with a blazing light and heat.
He wanted to keep that comet in his sights forever, to never lose the warmth and light that surrounded it. Not having Will in his life would be a loss that he couldn't handle.
Just when had Will become so important to him?
He really couldn't answer that question, Hannibal mused. He didn't know at exactly what point Will became the focus of his life; Hannibal just knew that he had.
And he also knew that he didn't regret that focus, not one bit. How could he regret finding the aeipathy that he had always longed for but never believed that he could feel? It was a gift, being able feel to such enduring passion, such fierce and complete love.
It was said that serial killers were incapable of love, but he begged to differ. A killer he might be, but he could change, if he chose to do so.
He would change. He had already set his mind to doing that, and Will was far more than worth it. If that was what it took to keep Will, then it was done.
This wasn't giving up something that he'd grown used to doing, Hannibal told himself firmly. This was what he wanted to do, and what was needed. Rather than giving something up, he was growing into something new, something different, into his future.
A future that he had never thought he could have, a future that he was almost surprised to realized that he desperately wanted, more than he had ever wanted anything.
The past would be hard to put aside, but he would do just that.
The past couldn't have a hold on him any more. He had to turn away from it, and look towards what he and Will would build together.
That aeipathy, that consuming passion for Will, would become the center of his life, rather than the killing and preparation of food. Actually, Will already was the center of his life. He had been turning away from the past more and more often lately.
It might be a struggle, and he had to remind himself that the future they would have was worth what he was leaving behind. But in the end, he would manage it.
Will was more important to him than anything else had ever been.
The passion that flowed between them was unlike anything Hannibal had ever known before. Of course, he had been with a myriad of lovers in the past -- both male and female -- but no one had ever moved him in the way that Will did. No one had ever touched his heart.
Through the years, he had begun to think that he had no heart to touch -- or at least, no emotions that he could think of as the more tender ones.
But Will had changed that. Will had turned him into a different person, a person who wanted to rediscover the man he was, a person who wanted to be better. He wanted to deserve Will's love; he wanted to make himself worthy of that emotion.
He wanted to be the man that Will needed. And he would do whatever it might take to become that man, no matter how hard it might be for him to do so.
He would begin remaking himself, Hannibal vowed. Will would never have reason to think that he had returned to the past; he never would. It wouldn't be easy, he knew. It would be a struggle at times, and he knew that the temptation would be overwhelming.
Still, he would manage to resist that temptation. He had to.
If he didn't, then he had no doubt that he would lose Will -- and he couldn't live with that. He needed Will in his life, in his bed, in his arms, by his side.
What would his life be without this passion that had suddenly and unexpected blazed between the two of them? He would still be a lonely man, still keeping all of his secrets held close, not letting anyone into his life and keeping the world at arm's length.
He no longer wanted to live like that. He wanted to share everything with Will; he wanted to have complete honesty between them, for them to have no secrets from each other.
Again, it wouldn't be easy. But it could be done.
He would change, and he would prove to Will that it was possible. That is, if Will hadn't already decided to call Jack and turn him in.
If he had, then there would have to be retribution. He didn't want to think about that; he didn't want to think that he could wish his Will any kind of harm. He wanted to hold on to that aeipathy, to keep that enduring passion close to him, to nurture it and let it grow to something even more.
Hannibal hoped that he would have that chance. He would simply have to wait, and rely on Will to make the right decision, to give him the chance that he needed.
If he received that chance, then he definitely intended to make the most of it.***
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