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Title: Hold On To Faith
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Will Graham/Lee Fallon
Fandom: Hannibal/The Big C
Rating: PG-13
Table: writers_choice
Prompt: #40, Faith
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Will Graham or Lee Fallon, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.


Everything seemed to be going so well right now.

Still, Will couldn't help wondering how long that would last. He knew that these treatments seemed to be working well for Lee, but he still worried.

What if the treatments stopped working? What if Lee found that he had to go somewhere else to take part in more trials, had to leave here to prolong his life? What if he died away from Will, the two of them parted with their future unrealized?

He didn't want to think like that, but he couldn't help it. Sometimes it was so hard to be strong, so hard to keep believing that things would work out for them.

Lee was better at that than he was.

it didn't mean that he loved Lee any less than Lee loved him, Will told himself firmly. It simply meant that he wasn't as good at being optimistic, that he had more of a tendency to look on the dark side of situations. He had to stop doing that.

He had to have faith, had to hold on to the positivity in their lives. If he didn't then he could be the cause of Lee getting depressed -- or even giving up.

That was the last thing he ever wanted to happen, Will thought, biting his lip. He wanted Lee to be positive and cheerful, and more than anything, he wanted these treatments to work. He wanted Lee to be declared cancer-free, and for their lives to be normal.

Losing Lee wasn't an option. Not now, and not ever.

How would he manage to get through every day without the man he loved by his side, now that he'd known what it was like to love?

He didn't want to think about that possibility. Without Lee in his life, he had been a ferociously lonely man; he had gotten through each day, but his life had been little more than an endless procession of days that never seemed to have any real meaning.

Oh, he'd enjoyed teaching, and enjoyed doing things in his free time like fishing and hiking in the woods with his dogs. But now, his life had changed so much.

Love had come flooding into his life, and he welcomed it with open arms. Lee had changed everything about him, and it was all for the better.

He was so much happier now, more open, more optimistic. Living with Lee had made it seem as though all the colors around him were brighter, sounds were sharper and more melodious, that everything was so much more beautiful than it had ever been before.

Falling in love had changed his whole perspective. And he loved it. He loved feeling like a changed man, as though the world had opened its arms to him in welcome.

Before, he'd always felt as though he was on the outside looking in.

Now, everything in life was so sweet, so precious. And he had to hold on to the faith that it would stay this way, that Lee would get better and that he would kick cancer to the curb for good. Lee was being so optimistic about this; he had to be like that, too.

So, no more thinking that this might not work and that Lee would have to be separated from him to go on to another drug trial. He wouldn't let that thought mess with his head.

He was going to hold on to faith, to believe that Lee would be all right. It might not be the easiest thing he'd ever done, but he would manage it, for his love's sake. Lee didn't need any negative thoughts bringing him down; he needed Will to be positive.

And really, Lee did look a lot better.

Will smiled at that thought, feeling his heart lighten. Lee looked better every day; even if he wasn't glowing with health, he didn't look like a cancer patient.

He smiled a lot, and he seemed happier than Will would have thought he'd be, given that he knew the trials weren't the easiest thing for him to deal with. But Lee was in love, just as he was, and love could lift people above the worries and stresses in their lives.

Love certainly lifted him higher than he'd thought he could ever be, Will thought with a smile. Love had changed his life for the better.

He hadn't looked for it, or thought he'd find it, but he welcomed it with open arms.

And now that he had that love in his life, he didn't intend to lose it. He wanted to do everything he could to keep that love strong, to make sure that it lasted.

He would also hold on to that faith, right along with Lee. He had to keep his spirits up, had to encourage his boyfriend and support him, no matter what might lie ahead of them. And he did desperately want to believe that this treatment was the one that would work.

Most of all, he wanted the two of them to be happy. To have a long life together, one that justified all of the faith that they were holding on to in the present.

Somehow, that future seemed much closer than he had thought it would.