Title: I'll Be Your Mirror
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Hannibal Lecter/Will Graham
Fandom: Hannibal
Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: One-shot.
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Hannibal Lecter or Will Graham, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.
***
"You are more like me than you may realise, Will."Hannibal's voice was strong and sure, and Will almost flinched when he heard it. He didn't want to believe those words; they weren't true. Not at all.
He was nothing like Hannibal. He never would be. Yes, he had killed people, but he hadn't done it for the pure pleasure that Hannibal seemed to derive from killing.
He didn't enjoy killing people. He hated it. He had only done it in self-defense, or to save an innocent person's life. He didn't like taking life; he thought less of himself for having done so. Yes, there was an adrenaline rush in doing it, but that was just his body reacting, not his mind.
Killing appalled him. There were times when it had to be done, but he would never get pleasure from it in the way that Hannibal did. Never.
It was only one reason why Hannibal's intent to make Will be just like him was never going to work, Will told himself firmly. He could never be a conscienceless murderer.
But he couldn't tell Hannibal that fact.
If he did, then his careful plans would fall apart. He had to be able to trap Hannibal into thinking that he was becoming what was wanted, that Hannibal controlled him.
That wasn't going to be easy to do. Every nerve and fiber of his body, as well as his mind, screamed out to him to deny Hannibal's words, to push them away.
Doing that wasn't an option. He had to seem subservient, had to make Hannibal think that he was willing to become a killer, even to take direction from him. He had to make this monster believe that he was becoming a mirror image of him, turning into the same kind of monster.
He would never do that. He would never become the remorseless killer that Hannibal was. But Hannibal didn't know that. He thought that he was winning.
He'd never win. But he had to think that he could.
Will took a deep breath, pushing down the resentment that he felt, trying to make himself sound as though he was a little confused when he finally spoke.
"Maybe I am," he said, his words coming out slowly, as though he was thinking about what he said. "That's one thing that being behind bars taught me."
Hannibal nodded, looking pleased.
"I'll be your mirror, Will," he said, his voice very soft. "You can look to me as the example of what you are becoming, as the image of what you should strive for."
Strive for? Will almost wanted to laugh. He didn't want to be anything like the monster who stood in front of him. He wasn't a merciless killer; he wasn't someone who enjoyed causing the deaths of others. He didn't want to be anything like Hannibal, not in any way.
But he had to pretend that he did. So he took a deep breath, and merely nodded, not trusting himself to speak. He wasn't sure of just what words might come out if he did.
He couldn't risk Hannibal having even a slight suspicion that he wasn't becoming just what this man wanted him to be. No, not a man. He couldn't call Hannibal a man any longer.
He was a monster who wore a human face.
Will knew that he had a dark side within himself. Of course he did. Everyone did. But he wouldn't let that darkness take him over, as Hannibal had. He would fight it.
And he would win, he vowed. He wasn't someone who would simply give in to that dark side and let it rule him. He was a good person, which was something that Hannibal could never be.
Hannibal was that darkness personified. If he didn't know better, he would swear that Hannibal was evil come to life, the darkness within every person made flesh and bone. He was dangerous, not only to Will, but to the world at large. He couldn't be allowed to stay free.
Will had to find a way to trick him into making some kind of confession, to put him behind bars for good. If he didn't, then not only would he never be safe, but neither would anyone else.
He didn't want to look into the mirror that Hannibal held up to him. He didn't want to risk losing himself in that mirror. He didn't want to see that darkness within.
But if he wanted to outsmart Hannibal, he had no choice.
He was treading a fine line, and he knew it. How easy would it be to let himself fall into that mirror that Hannibal held up to himself, to give in to that darkness?
Far too easy, and he was well aware of that fact. But he wasn't going to let himself fall; he was stronger than that. He was one of the good guys; the dark side might beckon to him, and even look seductive, but that was its power. It always looked good, but he knew the consequences of embracing it.
He'd seen those consequences overtake other people, and they weren't going to do the same to him. He could resist them -- and he could be the winner of this battle.
He just had to tread carefully, and constantly watch his back.
Because if he didn't, he knew all too well that he could easily find that there was knife embedded there, one wielded by Hannibal. Who would have no remorse over killing him.
Will took another deep breath, calming himself down. That wasn't going to happen. He was going to be vigilant, and he was going to keep himself safe. Safe and alive.
He wouldn't let himself be submerged into that mirror.
Still, he had to pretend that he could be; he had to make Hannibal believe that he was falling under some sort of spell, that he was giving in to that dark side.
He smiled at Hannibal, inclining his head. "I'm just going to have to trust you to lead me in the right direction, aren't I? And to keep holding up that mirror when I need it."
The flicker of pleasure in the depths of Hannibal's eyes chilled him to the bone.
***
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