Title: Mutual Innocence
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Will Graham/Sherlock Holmes
Fandom: Hannibal
Rating: PG-13
Table: 9, 50ficlets
Prompt: 25, Innocence
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Hannibal Lecter or Will Graham, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.
***
Their mutual innocence didn't bother him. Not really.
Will sighed as he stole a glance at Sherlock across the room; his boyfriend was engrossed in whatever he was looking at on the computer screen.
He liked watching Sherlock, liked seeing the concentration that ran across those handsome features when he looked at or read something that could be the precursor to an interesting case. He loved unraveling all of the complexities of that fascinating mind.
Sherlock didn't think like other people did; that was one of the things that made him so interesting, and one of the reasons that Will had fallen for him.
But was he being too cavalier about their mutual innocence when it came to the physical side of having a relationship? Will couldn't help feeling that Sherlock was pushing it aside, not wanting to deal with it, and that such an attitude would cause problems later.
He hoped that wasn't the case. He wanted to believe that the two of them would indeed fall into the more physical aspects of their relationship naturally.
But how could they, when neither of them had been involved before?
It was more than a little daunting to realize that sex was an unexplored territory for both of them, and that it could be very awkward the first time they came together.
Oh, of course they both knew about the mechanics of sex. They both knew what went where, and what they were supposed to do. And Will didn't doubt that they would have no problems with the emotional aide of it. They loved each other. That wasn't in question.
Still, there would be some pain involved, and he couldn't help but cringe from that. And which of them was going to end up being the more aggressive partner?
He didn't think he had it in him to do that.
Maybe his attitude would change once they'd made love, and he was more comfortable with being physical and sharing his body. He hoped so.
It wasn't that he didn't want to make love to Sherlock, Will told himself firmly. His boyfriend was a gorgeous man; of course he wanted to make love to him. But he'd never done anything like that before, and he felt more than a little lost as to what it would be like.
He'd never been the kind of person who was aggressive about anything. Even when he'd been working in the field with the FBI, he'd always held back. He'd never been pushy.
Maybe that was why Hannibal had been able to use him and manipulate him in the way he had, Will told himself bitterly. Because he hadn't been aggressive enough.
Hannibal had seen him as a victim -- and for a while, he had been. He'd let himself be manipulated, and he had believed all of Hannibal's lies. It had been easier to do so than to fight; but fortunately, he had come to his senses and stopped submitting to those mind games.
He'd almost come to his senses too late, Will thought with a shudder. If Sherlock hadn't come along when he did, there was no telling what could have happened.
He might be dead now, convicted of crimes that he hadn't committed.
But thanks to Sherlock, he wasn't. Thanks to Sherlock, he had a wonderful new life, in a place where he felt more at home with each passing day.
Will took a deep breath, then another. There was nothing for him to be worried about. Yes, the two of them might be somewhat innocent when it came to lovemaking, but they would take things one step at a time, and they would become comfortable together.
Every new couple probably had to deal with misgivings about their first time together, he told himself firmly. He wasn't the only person who'd ever felt this way.
Whatever the problems were, they'd get past them.
If there was some awkwardness -- and the first few times, there was bound to be -- they would deal with it, and they would work through it.
Yes, they'd both be nervous the first time, and probably a little scared, too. Their innocence might weigh on them, but it was something that could be overcome. And it was something they could work through as a couple, together, helping each other.
The two of them could overcome any problems they might have. They loved each other too much not to be able to solve anything that might stand in their way.
Love was as new to both of them as sex was, Will thought, taking another deep breath. But the two of them had come a long way together. Neither of them was hiding any more; there were no secrets between them, nothing they couldn't talk through.
He hadn't thought that he was the sort of person who was good with relationships. Now, his attitude about himself just might be changing for the better.
And maybe, in some ways, their mutual innocence was a good thing.
Neither of them had any emotional baggage from the past to stand in their way. They were both coming to this relationship fresh and new, with no past entanglements.
And no expectations, he reminded himself. Neither of them knew what to expect from a serious relationship because they'd never been in one before. So that could only be good; they didn't expect things to turn out a certain way. They could take each day as it came.
Their innocence in the ways of sex didn't have to be a barrier, he told himself. It would be something that they faced together, and found mutual pleasure in.
Suddenly, he couldn't wait for it to happen.
***
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