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Title: Personal Paradise
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter
Fandom: Hannibal
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 942
Author's Note: Sequel to "Like A Fairy Tale."
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Will Graham or Hannibal Lecter, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.***
Loving Will was like living in a personal paradise.
Hannibal smiled as he looked over at his fianceŽe, his eyes drinking Will in as though he was a cool oasis and Hannibal was a man dying of thirst.
He loved this man beyond belief, beyond anything that he'd ever imagined he could feel. And, wonder of wonders, Will felt the same way about him. It was hard for him to believe.
He had never thought that he would be married, had never even dared to dream of letting himself care for someone enough to want to spend the rest of his life with them, until he had met Will. He had never thought that he was capable of such love. Not him. Not since he was a small child.
But Will had brought something out in him that he hadn't realized was hidden deep within himself -- the desire to love and to be loved in return. It was still there.
How could that be? Hannibal asked himself for perhaps the hundredth time. How could that spark of need have survived within him through all the years, even decades, of loneliness?
Somehow, it had -- and he was grateful for that fact.
He had thought in the past that paradise consisted of living the life he'd always had without being caught, of being able to revel in his ability to slip past any scrutiny. But he had been wrong.
He hadn't truly found paradise until Will Graham had looked at him with love in those incredible blue eyes. Until the moment that their hands had first touched, and those first smiles at each other.
That was when he had truly discovered what he wanted out of life. He wanted Will, and he wanted to be with him forever. Before he'd fallen for this man, "forever" hadn't really seemed to exist. He had always thought that he would either die in some dangerous situation, or be caught at his indiscretions.
But he hadn't been, and it seemed as though Will's love was his reward for being able to continue with his life as it had been for all these years without being discovered.
Life had long seemed as though it was empty and meaningless, despite the suave front that he put on publicly. In fact, as some point, he had almost wanted to be found out.
Now, he no longer felt that way. All he wanted now was to have a life with Will, a life that they would both treasure, a life that he truly felt they deserved with each other.
Hannibal let his thoughts drift back over those empty years, then pushed the memories firmly away from him. He didn't want to think about them any longer. That part of his life was over.
That was all behind him now. For a while, he had toyed with the thought of keeping to his secret life, thinking that it would be exhilarating to hide it from the man who would be his husband. It would be more proof of his intellectual superiority if he could successfully live a double life.
But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that such a secret would be the serpent in his paradise, and that it would eventually tear apart the life he would build with Will.
He didn't need those indiscretions any longer. It might not be easy to give them up, but he was more than willing to sacrifice them for the love that he so desperately wanted.
And he knew that Will couldn't love him as he had been.
Yes, Will had fallen in love with him as he was -- but then again, Will hadn't known the truth about who he was. That knowledge would destroy the love he felt.
Just the thought of losing that love made bile rise in the back of Hannibal's throat. Losing Will was not an option. Not now, and not ever. He had to give up his past life.
He really had no choice in the matter. If he wanted to retain the personal paradise that had come to mean so much to him, if he wanted to marry Will and forge a life together, then he could no longer hold on to those activities that had turned him into who he was. He had to make a new life for himself.
With Will by his side, he could do that. It might not be easy, but nothing worth having ever came easily, he reminded himself. He had said that to others often enough.
He couldn't risk losing what he had found and now held close to him, not for any reason. No matter how hard giving up that life might be for him.
He would do it. For Will. For the love they shared, and their future together.
Will would never discover who he had been, that he was the monster Will had been chasing for so long. That part of his life would be hidden, buried deeply beneath the surface.
It would be obliterated, and no one would ever be able to find any traces that could link it back to him. He wasn't going to take the risk of being exposed. He couldn't afford to. Not now, not when he had everything that he'd ever wanted within his grasp. Not when he was so happy and contented.
He would bury the past, get rid of everything that would even remind him of it, and Will would never know. The two of them would live a long and happy life together.
The personal paradise that he'd found would be assured.***
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