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Title: Unthinkable
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Will Graham/Lee Fallon
Fandom: Hannibal/The Big C
Rating: PG-13
Table: 1drabble
Prompt: 23, Defeat
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Will Graham or Lee Fallon, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.


Lee winced as he sat down behind the wheel of his car, closing his eyes.

He hadn't felt this bad since he'd begun this clinical trial; he had to face the fact that perhaps this would be yet another disappointment.

If that was the case, then he would have to look around for another trial, and try to get his name on the list for it. That was really all that he could do; and if it meant being separated from Will for a while, then he would have to deal with that as best he could.

The very thought made him want to cry; he idea of being away from Will for even a day or two was enough to make panic skitter through him.

Being away from Will was unthinkable.

He thought back on all the people he'd known who had left to take part in clinical trials who had died while they were gone, people he'd cared for and had never seen again.

He had learned not to let himself care too much about people; too many of them disappeared from his life all too soon, and he couldn't help feeling that he would someday do the same to people who cared about him. He didn't want to put Will through that.

But would it be even worse to simply accept defeat, to stay here with Will and waste away, and make his boyfriend have to watch him fade away day by day?

No, he couldn't do that to Will. That would be more painful for both of them than if he died a long way away from Will, without his love by his side.

The very thought of his life ending without Will being there with him was enough to make tears come to Lee's eyes, wobbling around the edges of his vision before spilling over. He wiped at them angrily, knowing that tears wouldn't do him any good.

He wasn't going to sit here and feel sorry for himself. He wasn't going to accept defeat. He still had a lot of fight in him -- and now, he had something to fight for.

He wasn't going to just fade out of Will's life.

He wouldn't accept defeat. He wouldn't. He had far too much to live for now that Will was a part of his life. He hadn't found love so recently just to give up on it.

Will deserved better of his lover than that. He didn't deserve to have the person who loved him slink away from him, even if that was meant to spare him the pain of watching his loved one die. He wouldn't leave, no matter what happened. He would stay, and he would fight.

With that thought firmly in his mind, he fastened his seat belt, started the car, and drove out of the parking lot. His spirits rose as he thought of going home to Will.

Defeat was not an option. He would fight. And he would win.