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Title: Falling Away With You
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Hannibal Lecter/Will Graham
Fandom: Hannibal
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Hannibal Lecter or Will Graham, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.***
Will gasped as Hannibal's lips trailed down his body, his eyes opening wide. He wanted to bury his fingers in Hannibal's hair, but somehow, he didn't think the other man would like that, so he kept them clenched at his sides, his body taut and tense.
He hadn't expected Hannibal to do this, but then, he hadn't expected to be left hanging, either. This all felt surreal, as if he was in some kind of fugue state.
Hannibal's mouth was soft and warm on his cock, the sensations that his tongue was eliciting unlike anything that Will had ever felt before. He'd had other men give him blow jobs, but nothing had ever been like this. He was sure that he was going to explode at any second.
But somehow, he didn't. Hannibal managed to hold him back, even as that wicked, wanton tongue urged him on towards completion.
Will couldn't stop his hips from thrusting upwards, his body begging for more.
He could dimly feel Hannibal's hands on his hips, holding him down, pressing him against the plush velvet of the couch. Had Hannibal really just made love to him here -- if it could be called that? It hadn't seemed like making love at all.
It had seemed like an assertion of Hannibal's authority over him. There had been nothing about it that he could call loving or gentle. No, Hannibal had taken him.
But wasn't that what he wanted? To be taken, to be pulled out of himself and give an experience he'd never had before? Wasn't that part of his overwhelming desire for Hannibal -- knowing that no one else could give him what this man could?
He gasped again as Hannibal deep-throated his cock, lifting his head to look down at his lover. Hannibal's cheeks were hollow with the force of his sucking, his hair hanging around his face in damp tendrils, his eyes seeming to blaze up at Will.
Those eyes held all the desire in the world.
No one had ever looked at him like that. No one had ever wanted him in the way that Hannibal did. And no one had ever touched him and set him on fire in the way that Hannibal did.
This was a new experience, all right. This was something that he'd dreamed about but had never thought that he would feel, this overwhelming lust that completely overrode everything else in his life. This was like some kind of vivid dream that had miraculously come true.
Everything that had happened between himself and Hannibal in the past few days seemed like a dream, from the first time Hannibal had taken him until this very moment. He could swear that he would wake up at any moment, alone in his bed at home.
Alone, burning for Hannibal, needing that touch, his body on fire with the constant ache of his desire for what he'd thought he could never have.
He was so close to the edge now; all it would take was another few seconds, if Hannibal kept up what he was doing. His body was coiled, ready to jump from a daringly high precipice, secure in the knowledge that he would be caught before he could plunge to the ground.
Or would he? Was Hannibal going to be there for him?
Just as that thought coalesced into his mind, his body seemed to explode in a burst of pleasure, drawing a soft moan from his throat. His hands clenched at his sides, his hips jerking up against Hannibal's hands. He was sure that he saw a shower of sparks, all the colors of the rainbow.
Nothing had ever felt like this; pure and utter bliss, as if his body had been stretched taut and had finally been given the release it craved. He felt as though he was melting, boneless, unable to move or speak; all he could do was take deep, gasping breaths.
He felt as though a part of himself had fallen away, never to be found again.
But wasn't this what he'd wanted? To be falling away with Hannibal, giving himself to the man he'd wanted for so long, finally achieving the dream that he had thought would never come true. It hardly seemed possible that he'd reached that peak.
Slowly, Will raised a hand to press it against his chest, feeling the rapid beating of his heart. His hand was trembling, as was his entire body.
Hannibal was sitting back on his heels, regarding Will with a slight smile curving his lips, looking very pleased with himself. He tilted his head to the side as their gazes met, dark eyes locking with blue, his expression unreadable, inscrutable.
Without warning, he leaned forward, taking Will's face between his hands and studying him intently before placing his lips on Will's, the kiss hard and demanding.
Pure ecstasy shot through Will at the touch of those lips; he could taste himself in Hannibal's kiss, and he didn't find that unpleasant at all.
"I think you needed that very badly."
Will could only nod in acquiescence; he had indeed needed that release, had needed it for a long time. It was as though something in him had broken free, as if some of the barriers he kept so carefully erected around himself had crumbled to the ground.
It was exhilarating. And frightening. He hadn't wanted to let himself be so completely exposed, naked in more than just the physical. At this moment, Hannibal could see into his soul.
Hannibal reached out to him, taking his hands and slowly pulling him upright into a sitting position. Will winced as he sat up; he was going to be sore for a while, and a part of him wished that Hannibal had been a little gentler with fucking him.
He winced again at the sound of that word in his head. Fucking. What they'd done was more than just fucking, wasn't it? It had to be.
He couldn't call it making love. Not really. But it was more than just sex.
Hannibal knew him as no one else did. They might not have love between them -- at least not yet -- but they had something that no one else had given him. Something that he couldn't put a name to, but which existed nonetheless. Something that he wouldn't let go.
"You're going to be sore for the rest of the day," Hannibal said softly, reaching out to caress his cheek. "I'm sorry about that. I probably should have broken the mood, but I wasn't prepared to have you change your mind. I didn't want to take that chance."
"I wouldn't have," Will murmured, watching Hannibal as the other man uncoiled his lanky body gracefully, getting up and moving across the floor to pick up his robe and don it. Will suddenly felt very vulnerable, very naked, and very exposed.
Maybe that was because he was naked and exposed, he told himself wryly. More so than he'd ever been in his entire life.
He was completely vulnerable to this man, every nerve raw and exposed.
"I know you have somewhere to be," Hannibal told him, his voice suddenly distant, as though what they'd done had never happened. "I won't keep you. But I hope you'll come back tonight. I don't want another three days to go by before I see you again."
Will felt dazed, lost, confused. Hannibal was pushing him away one moment, and telling him to come back in the next. What did he really want?
Will watched as Hannibal gathered his clothes, then walked over and handed them to him, his expression grave. "I want this to continue, Will. I don't intend to let you go. But it isn't a simple thing between us. There's a great deal for us to discuss about what we both want."
Will nodded, unable to think of anything to say. He wanted to start a conversation, to say something about what had happened between them, but his mind was a blank.
For once in his life, he was completely speechless.
It was as though having sex with Hannibal had robbed him of the power to speak, or even to think, as if falling away with him into that incredible pleasure had taken away some intrinsic part of himself. But at the moment, it seemed like a worthwhile trade.
"I'll see you later tonight, Will," Hannibal said softly, a smile on his lips. "Come over whenever you want. I'll be here. Ready for you." With those words, he turned and left the room.
Will got dressed in a daze, not really thinking about what he was doing. He didn't look at the painting that had started it all as he made his way to the front door; he wasn't ready to see himself like that again. It still felt as though he was walking through a dream.
Had all of this really happened? It felt surreal, insubstantial, as if it would all fade away into nothingness if he thought about it too much.
No, it wasn't a dream, he thought, raising a hand to his mouth. Hannibal had done those things to him. They'd been together. It had finally happened -- and he didn't know what to do about it. He felt as though he was stuck in limbo, not knowing which path to take.
He needed to think about all of this, to turn it over in his mind. But there was really only on way to go, wasn't there? Forward, with Hannibal. This was what he had wanted, and now that he had it, he'd be a fool to let it go when it had only barely begun.
Will almost moaned as he licked his lips, closing his eyes, feeling unsteady on his feet. It was all such a rush, an incredible, mind-blowing experience.***
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