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Title: You're the One
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Jimmy Palmer/Tim McGee
Fandom: NCIS
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1,186
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Jimmy Palmer or Tim McGee, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.***
"Jimmy, what's wrong?" The worry in Tim's voice was almost palpable.
Jimmy turned from the sliding glass doors in the living room, where he was looking out at the stars. It was a clear night, and the sky was dotted with pinpricks of light.
He loved nights like this, when he could look out at the stars and think about his relationship with the man he loved. Nights when he could see the sky clearly, and think.
But tonight, his thoughts were clouded by a fear that had begun to grow lately, a fear that Tim would get tired of waiting for him to be ready to take their relationship to the next physical level. A fear that Tim would end up walking away from him, his patience at an end.
Realistically, he knew that his boyfriend wasn't that kind of man. Tim had sworn that he would wait, and Jimmy had to believe him. His heart would let him do no less.
But still, it was frightening to think that he could lose Tim. He was terrified that at some point, it would be over between them, and he would end up alone.
Nothing had ever scared him so much in his entire life.
Even when he had been in the clutches of that madman, even when a part of him had been ripped away by force, he had never been as utterly terrified as he was now.
His heart told him that he had nothing to be worried about, but he couldn't quite wrap his head around that fact. His mind refused to listen to what his heart knew was the truth.
"Nothing's wrong," he said softly, trying to smile. Jimmy knew that he should talk to Tim about what he was feeling, but for some reason, that was the hardest thing he had ever tried to do. Every time he opened his mouth to speak about it, he found himself chickening out and not saying a word.
Somehow, he was sure that Tim knew how he felt, and wasn't saying anything either because he didn't want to cause trouble or rock the boat of their relationship.
Still, he couldn't help feeling that at the moment, they were in a very leaky boat, and that he was going to spend a lot of time frantically trying to bail them out.
"Yes, there is," Tim said, his voice firm. "Jimmy, talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking about that's making you so quiet lately. I think I have an idea of what's getting to you, but neither one of us can do anything about it unless you talk to me. You've been brooding way too much."
Had he? Jimmy thought with some surprise. Well, maybe he had. He'd certainly been brooding enough for Tim to nice, and now to comment on it.
Tim was right. He needed to stop brooding and start communicating, or else all of his fears would come true and he would end up losing the man he loved.
He had to talk to his boyfriend if he wanted their relationship to move forward.
"I .... I guess I'm just worried about some things," he managed to say as he moved into the living room and took in the worried, strained expression on Tim's face.
He hated himself for making his boyfriend look like this. It was obvious that Tim was under a lot of stress -- and Jimmy couldn't help feeling that it was all his fault.
"What are you worried about, baby?" Tim asked, his voice very soft. He sat down on the couch, and after a moment's hesitation, Jimmy sat down beside him, knowing that the time had finally come for him to voice his fears to Tim, and let his boyfriend know exactly how he felt.
He rested his head on Tim's shoulder, hardly knowing where to begin, then deciding that it would be best to just spit it out, to get everything into the open, front and center.
"I keep worrying that you're going to get tired of waiting for me," he blurted out, unable to hold his fears back any longer. "That I'll end up being alone. That you'll just walk away."
There. He'd said it, at last. A little crudely, but the words were finally out.
Jimmy rested his head on Tim's shoulder, almost wishing that he hadn't said anything. But he had needed to get the words out; he needed his lover to know how he felt.
Tim's arms were around him; his boyfriend was turning Jimmy to face him, placing a finger under his chin and making his raise his head so they were gazing into each other's eyes.
"Jimmy, that would never happen, not in a million years," Tim said, his voice a mere whisper. "I would never, never leave you. Don't you get that, love? You're the one, Jimmy. You're the only one for me. If I had to wait a lifetime and more for you to be ready, I'd gladly do it."
Jimmy could feel relief flood through his veins at those words; they were exactly what he needed to hear, and he could see the sincerity in Tim's eyes. He meant those words.
"It won't be that long, I promise," he murmured, unable to take his gaze from Tim's face. "I want us to be physical, Tim. I really do. It's just going to take some time."
Tim nodded, smiling as he stroked Jimmy's hair back from his face.
"I understand that, baby," he said, his voice still very soft. "I do. Believe me. I'm willing to wait for as long as it takes, Jimmy. Because I know when we're finally together physically, it's going to be amazing."
He knew that, too, Jimmy realized. When he and Tim finally made love, when they crossed that last barrier that still lay between them, it was going to be the most incredible experience of his life -- just because he would be with Tim, and he would finally have put all of his fears behind him.
"And you're the only one for me," he managed to whisper, though his throat felt scratchy with imminent tears -- tears of joy and relief that Tim understood how he felt.
This man was indeed the one. The only one, now and forever.
They didn't need any more words; the two of them simply snuggled on the couch, holding on to each other, Jimmy curled into Tim's embrace with his arms around his boyfriend's waist and his head on Tim's shoulder.
He felt more safe and secure than he ever had, and that nagging worry was gone for good. They were moving into the future with an optimistic outlook, and for Jimmy, that future looked brighter than ever.***