Title: Ages of You
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Ten.5
Fandom: Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
Table: writers_choice
Prompt: #396, Age
Author's Note: The human version of the Doctor is being referred to as John Smith in this fic, since it's the Doctor's human alias and his clone needed a name.
Author's Note: Spoilers for Journey's End, somewhat. This is an completely alternate take on the ending of Season Four.
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor, or his human clone. Please do not sue.

***

"What are you going to think of me when I start aging?" Jamie asked the Doctor as the two of them sat cross-legged on a blanket on a sandy beach. He looked out over the horizon, not meeting the Doctor's eyes, almost as though he was afraid to look at his lover.

The Doctor turned towards his human clone, frowning at the thought. He hadn't really thought about what it would be like once Jamie started to noticeably age, though it was an inevitability. He was, after all, only human -- and humans did age rapidly.

Why did he even need to think about Jamie's question? He would still love the other man no matter how rapidly he might age. Jamie was his hearts and soul, the person who was closer to him than anyone else had ever been in all of his long life.

He would always love this man. Jamie wasn't just his lover; this man was part of him, the most important part. Jamie owned his heart and soul as no one else ever had, as no one ever could. And he would always see his lover as the man he belonged with.

How could he ever consider being with anyone else? No one could be what Jamie was to him; there was no one else who could understand him in the way that Jamie did. This man was literally a part of him; Jamie knew everything about him.

That added a spice to their intimacy that he could never find with another person -- and it gave Jamie an insight into his emotions that would also be impossible for anyone else to have. The two of them were meant for each other; that couldn't be more obvious.

Besides that, age didn't matter to him. He was already so much older than anyone else he could ever know that the years seemed to him a matter of great indifference. What did it matter what ages were? Age was only a number, one that he didn't measure anyone by.

He'd known Jack for years; the immortal was proof that maturity didn't necessarily come with age. And there had been people in his life who didn't have even a quarter of Jack's years who were far mature than he could ever hope to be in his wildest dreams.

What could he tell his lover to make Jamie feel more secure? All he could do was say what was in his hearts; the truth would be better than any lie that he could make up. And he owed it to the man he loved to be honest, to speak from his hearts and soul.

"I'm going to love you just as much as I do now," he said simply, hoping that Jamie didn't feel he'd taken too long to come up with that answer. It was what he'd felt in his hearts, and always would. It had just taken him a few moments to put those feelings into words.

"Are you sure?" Jamie's voice was uncertain; he didn't look at the Doctor as he spoke. "I'll be old and grey and ugly, Doctor. I'll have wrinkles and liver spots, I'll probably be stooped over, I'll have terrible eyesight. I won't be the man you know now."

"Do you think that will make me love you less?" the Doctor asked, his voice soft and little reproachful. "I'd never love you less just because of how you look, Jamie. You'll always have my hearts, no matter how old you get. You should know that by now."

"A part of me does," Jamie admitted with a sigh. "But there's another part that says you'll get tired of me when I'm not young and handsome any more. That I'm more of a mirror for you than even you realise -- and that I won't always be a mirror that looks flattering."

"What do you expect me to do, Jamie?" The Doctor sighed, closing his eyes and letting the words come out without thinking about them. "Take you back to Earth and leave you there just because you're not young any longer? Do you really think I'm that heartless?"

"Of course not!" Jamie's denial was quick, but his voice was suddenly breathless and trembling. "You'd never think of doing something like that -- would you?" he asked in a whisper. "If you would think about it, then maybe we should re-evaluate my being with you."

The Doctor shook his head, moving over on the blanket to wrap an arm around Jamie's waist and pull him close. "No, we don't have to do that. And you know that I wouldn't take you back to Earth just because you were aging. That's a fact of life, Jamie."

"I know it is -- for me, because I'm human." Jamie didn't meet the Doctor's eyes; he moved his hand to the sand beside their blanket, drawing patterns in it without any apparent reason to do so. "But for you? Age won't ever be a problem. I'm not like you, Doctor."

"And I don't want you to be," the Doctor said softly, raising a hand to turn Jamie's face to his so that he could look into his lover's eyes. "I love you just as you are, sweetheart. Through all of your ages, I'll still be in love with you. That will never change."

"Will you still want to make love to me when I'm old and grey and wrinkled?" Jamie whispered, his voice still trembling a little. "I don't want to lose any of the closeness we have, Doctor. Physical, or otherwise. I'm terrified that's going to go away once I start to age."

The Time Lord shook his head, smiling as he drew the other man closer against his body. "I can't imagine not ever wanting to make love to you, even when you're old," he murmured, nuzzling his cheek against his lover's. "You'll always be the man I want, Jamie. Always."

Finally, Jamie smiled, his dark eyes seeming to light up with love. "I don't have anything to be afraid of, do I?" he asked, his voice catching in his throat slightly before he cleared it. "I've been worrying and being paranoid for absolutely no reason."

"You have no reason to think that I'll ever get tired of you, Jamie," the Doctor murmured, his voice soft and husky. "Through all the ages of who you are, I'll always love you. As a young man, middle-aged, and old. You'll still be my Jamie. And you'll still own my hearts."

"Even when I'm not attractive any more?" Was it his imagination, or was Jamie's voice still trembling? Did he still sound upset -- or as though he didn't quite believe what he was being told? Well, the Doctor thought, he would chase that doubt away.

"Do you really believe that you could ever be unattractive to me?" he asked, bowing his head to trail his lips along the slender column of the other man's throat. "Even when you're old, grey and wrinkled, you'll still be the most beautiful man I've ever known."

"Really?" Jamie sounded amazed; the tone of his voice brought a smile to the Doctor's face. "Do you think we'll still be making love then, too?" His voice sounded hopeful; the Time Lord's smile grew wider, his own voice soft and seductive when he answered.

"We'll still be making love until you don't want to any more," the Doctor told him, his lips against Jamie's skin. "That's a promise," he breathed into his lover's ear, nibbling at the delicate earlobe. "I'll never want to stop making love to you, sweetheart."

"Me, not want to make love?" Jamie's laugh was soft and throaty; he turned his head, his own lips finding the Doctor's cheek and moving down from there. The Time Lord almost groaned as that soft mouth moved down his throat, mirroring his own movements of a few moments ago.

It didn't matter to him how much this man might age. He could never imagine not wanting Jamie, not having this man in his life or in his hearts. This was the relationship he'd waited for all of his life, the one that made him complete, the one he'd always wanted but never thought that he'd find.

"I'll always be with you, Jamie. Through all the ages of you, all the years of your life -- and into whatever might be ahead for us after this life is done," he whispered, unable to hold the words back. He wasn't sure where they came from, but they had to be spoken.

No, the Doctor thought to himself as soon as those words were out. He knew where they had come from. They were spoken from his hearts, from his soul, from the very depths of his being, the very core of him where his feelings for this man resided at their deepest intensity.

"And I'll always love you, Doctor," Jamie answered, his voice barely a whisper of sound in the Doctor's ear. "I'll always be with you, even after I'm in this realm with you physically any longer. I'll always be in your hearts, and I'll always be a part of you."

The Doctor didn't have any more words to answer those; he answered in the only way he could, with a gentle kiss that said everything in his hearts. Jamie's arms slid around his waist, pulling him close in a mutual embrace that made the world recede as they lost themselves in each other.

***