e = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});Title: A Time and Place
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Peter Carlisle
Fandom: Doctor Who/Blackpool
Rating: R
Table: 1, fanfic50
Prompt: 45, Hollow
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Peter Carlisle. Please do not sue.***
"Why is it that the hollow at the base of a man's throat is so sexy?" Peter murmured, lowering his head to kiss the Doctor's neck, working his way down to the tender area he'd just been talking about. "There's just something about it that fascinates me."
The Doctor moaned softly as his boyfriend's lips brushed over his collarbone, stretching his lean body out under the other man. "Maybe it's because that part of me is so close to my throat -- and you've always seemed to enjoy nibbling on my neck."
"Maybe I'm a bit of a vampire," Peter said, laughter in his voice. He continued to kiss his way down the Doctor's body, flicking his tongue over one small nipple, then the other, before moving back up to the base of the Time Lord's throat again.
"Mmm, that feels marvelous," the Doctor sighed, raising his arms above his head and settling himself a bit more comfortably on the pillows. Peter was kissing the hollow at the base of his throat again, those soft lips sending a shiver down his spine.
No one else had ever touched him in the way that Peter did; in spite of the fact that his lover had never been with a man before the first time they were together, he had certainly learned very quickly. The Doctor had been surprised at just how quickly.
But he certainly wasn't complaining. He and Peter had melded into the perfect couple; he couldn't imagine sharing his life with anyone else now. The thought of ever having another companion was ludicrous; no one would ever fit with him as well as Peter did.
Of course, Peter was human; he wouldn't be here forever. He would age and die, as all humans did. And the Doctor would be left a hollow shell, with no one in his heart, mourning the love of his life for what could be several more centuries before they finally met again.
His hearts clutched in his chest at the thought; he had to struggle to keep back a sudden sob. He didn't want Peter to know that he was thinking of things like this, not now when they were making love, when they'd had such a beautiful night.
Why was it that such thoughts could so easily reach into his mind and disturb the peace and happiness he had with Peter? It seemed that no matter how happy he was, darkness was always hovering on the edge of that happiness, waiting to step in at a moment's notice.
That hollow feeling was already starting to creep over him; the knowledge that eventually Peter would be taken away from him was affecting his ability to relax and enjoy what he shared with the other man at this moment, in the present time. He had to stop that.
He reached up to wrap his arms around Peter's neck, pulling his boyfriend down to him for a passionate kiss that took his breath away. If he kissed Peter often enough, hard enough, those thoughts would go away. They would be locked in the back of his mind, not allowed to escape.
It wasn't that easy to do away with them, though. Peter pulled back gently from their kiss, one hand gently smoothing back the damp tendrils of hair from the Doctor's forehead as he gazed down at the Time Lord. There was puzzlement in his gaze, a slight frown creasing his brow.
"Doctor, what is it?" he asked softly, his tone gentle and loving. "I can tell when something's bothering you, so don't tell me it's nothing. There's something in your eyes that tells me you're worried. I want to know what it is. Maybe I can help."
The Doctor started to shake his head, but found himself nodding reluctantly instead. He had no right to keep his feelings from Peter; this man was his lover, the other half of his soul. Peter deserved to know all that he was thinking, even if those thoughts were disturbing.
"I was just thinking about the inevitability of us having to part, because you're human," he said softly, not wanting to depress or upset Peter with his words, even though they were true. "I wish those thoughts hadn't popped into my head now, but I can't keep them away."
Peter nodded slowly, gazing at the Doctor with sad eyes. "I know, Doctor. I think about it sometimes, too. But what can we do? I'm not going to find the fabled fountain of youth, and I'm not going to live forever. We just have to take the time we have and enjoy it to the fullest."
"That's not always so easy to do when I can feel the future nipping at my heels," the Doctor whispered, trying to speak around the lump that had suddenly formed in his throat. "I don't want to depress you, Peter. But I can't stop thinking about the time when I won't have you here with me."
"Try not to think about it, love," Peter answered, sighing softly. "I know it's hard not to, but you can't let those thoughts overshadow the time we do have together. We have to live for today -- not worry about everything that could happen in the future."
He bent his head again to press a gentle kiss to the hollow at the base of the Doctor's throat; the Time Lord closed his eyes, letting himself relax and enjoy the caress. He didn't need to think about the future, not now. Peter was right.
Thinking of the time when he didn't have this man his life, and he would only be a hollow shell of who he was now, was self-defeating. And it would only take away from the time he did have with Peter, the time that they should spend living and loving.
That hollow feeling could be pushed away until later; he didn't need to let it take him over now. He needed to enjoy this time with the man he loved, and not think of the future. Besides, who knew what could happen in the years that they would spend together?
By the time Peter was older, they might have found some way to make him immortal. There was no telling what could happen. He could change in the same way that Jack had -- with some help from the Time Vortex. There were all sorts of possibilities.
But would Peter want that? the Doctor thought, a coldness creeping over him. Would he want to have an eternal life in an older body? How long would it take for something similar to what had happened to Jack to take place? And was it possible for that to happen twice?
Taking a deep breath, he determinedly pushed those thoughts away, locking them down and refusing to let them come through again. This wasn't the time or the place for them; he wanted to concentrate on Peter, not on his worries about their future.
"You're right, sweetheart," he whispered, reaching out to stroke soft fingertips down Peter's cheek and over his boyfriend's slightly scruffy jawline. "I shouldn't be thinking about the future now. Just about us, and how we are right here in the present."
Peter nodded, a smile curving his lips. "We have a long future ahead of us, I've no doubt," he said softly, taking the Doctor's hand in his own and bringing the Time Lord's fingertips to his lips, brushing a soft kiss across them. "And I want to enjoy every second of it."
"I'll try to make sure that you do just that," Peter told him with a smile. The other man lowered his head to the Time Lord's throat again, his soft lips teasing the Doctor's sensitive skin, making the Gallifreyan arch his back and moan his lover's name.
He needed to live in the present, rather than concentrating on the future. Yes, there might come a day when he wouldn't have Peter with him in body. But his lover would always be in his hearts and soul. Peter would always be here by his side in spirit.
And right now, he was here in the flesh. They were together, and they would be for a long time to come. He had to stop trying to look into the far-off future, and be content with what he had now. It was far better to live in the moment than to worry about what might happen later.
Closing his eyes, the Doctor gave himself over to the sensation of Peter's hands on his body, his lover's soft lips moving to places he didn't expect them to be. There was a time and place for everything -- and this was the time to concentrate on the here and now.***
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