Title: Living in Another World
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Michael Cutter/Ryan O'Halloran
Fandom: Law & Order/Law & Order: Special Victims Unit
Rating: PG-13
Table: 1drabble
Prompt: 40, Alternate Universe
Warning: Mentions of rape, previous non-con
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Michael Cutter or Ryan O'Halloran, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

***

This was harder to deal with than he'd thought it would be.

Michael leaned his head back against the comfortable leather armchair in his office, staring up at the ceiling. This wasn't how he wanted things to be.

He knew that he couldn't be the prosecutor on Stuckey's rape trial, as much as he wanted to be. He had too much of a personal involvement. The plaintiff was his boyfriend, and there was no way that anyone would see him as an unbiased party.

Hell, he wasn't unbiased. How could he be? There was no way that he could lay any claim to that, not given his personal relationship with Ryan.

No one could honestly say he was an unbiased party.

So much of the time lately, he felt that he was living in an alternate universe; the world felt as though it was spinning too fast on its axis, and he couldn't catch up.

There was so much happening in their lives, so much that Mike felt he couldn't take part in. The last thing he wanted was for his boyfriend to have to face Stuckey in that courtroom on his own, but Ryan would have to do just that. It couldn't be helped.

He had a court case of his own that day, a prosecution that he couldn't put off. He'd been working towards it for several months, and he had to be there.

But that meant leaving Ryan to face his demons alone, which he hated doing. He was sure that Ryan could handle himself, but he still wanted to be there.

He wanted to be as supportive of his boyfriend as he possibly could, but Ryan understood that he had his own responsibilities. Still, he'd wanted to be there in that courtroom by Ryan's side, to show the world that the man he loved wasn't alone.

If only he could do that, put his own work aside until all of this was resolved. But the world didn't stop its revolutions because of the problems one couple faced.

If he was living in another world, maybe that would be possible.

But he didn't live in another world, Michael thought with a sigh. He lived in this one, where he was only one man, and he couldn't be in two places at the same time.

He had tried to get his own court date moved, but he hadn't been able to do so. This was an important trial, and people had been waiting for a long time to get justice. He would have to do his job, even though he knew that part of his heart wouldn't be there.

It would feel as though he was in an alternate universe when he was in one courtroom, and Ryan was in another. But each of them would have to get by on their own.

Then, at the end of the day, they could be together with their victories.

***