Title: Minimizing the Danger
Pairing: John Reese/Jordan Hester
Fandom: Person of Interest
Prompt: 39, Death
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely John Reese or Jordan Hester, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.
***He was always going to worry about whether or not he should be with Jordan.
John sighed as he turned over in bed, propping himself up on one elbow and looking down at the man slumbering beside him. Jordan's lips were slightly curved in a smile, as though he was dreaming about something pleasant.
John hoped that his boyfriend's dreams were more pleasant than his own troubles thoughts; he didn't want Jordan to think about what he was contemplating.
Was he doing the right thing by loving this man, by being with him? Or was he, as Harold had pointed out more than once, placing Jordan in danger simply by being with him? Was this the right thing, for both of them?
Would Jordan be better off without him?
John closed his eyes as the pain of that thought sliced through him; he didn't want to think that either of them would be better off without each other. He didn't want to think about what it would be like to be parted from the man he loved.
But as Harold had told him over and over again, Jordan's life could be in danger just by knowing John. He could easily become a target.
Did he have the right to expose his boyfriend to that? He didn't think so, but at the same time, he didn't want to be noble and tell Jordan that they couldn't be together for his own good. It sounded so stuffy and useless.
He wasn't going to bring about Jordan's death. If he thought that things were getting too dangerous for his boyfriend, he wouldn't break up with Jordan; he would simply find a safe place for his lover to stay until the danger had passed.
Harold would say that wasn't good enough, of course. But then, Harold wasn't the one who was deeply in love.
His professional partner would err on the side of caution, breaking his own heart rather than take any kind of risk. Harold had learned the hard way what it was like to lose those that he loved -- but then again, so had John.
He wasn't going to risk Jordan's life. But he wasn't going to walk away, either.
There was a way to do both -- to have the love that he shared with Jordan, and to keep doing what he did for a living. He didn't want to stop. He liked helping people, liked knowing that he made a difference in the world.
Jordan wouldn't want him to stop, either. His boyfriend supported what he did, and John knew that Jordan was proud of him.
He would find a way to reconcile the two, his love and his job. Yes, the danger was there, and it would never go away completely. But it could always be minimized. He could find ways to protect Jordan, to keep him safe.
And he would find those ways, no matter how well they might be hidden.
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