Pairing: Severus Snape/ Lucius Malfoy
Warnings: Um, language, UST, angst
Disclaimer: Not mine, not likely to be mine
Feedback: Always appreciated, to firstname.lastname@example.org
Notes: There are some things you just have to write
Always surprising him, scaring him, making him jump. Like now, emerging from the shadows of the passageway, one arm pulling him into the corner, trapping him.
Like then, back then, silent in the dormitories, biting lips to keep from crying out and nails embedded into sweating flesh, tightening and pressing and the pain never enough to silence that blissful feeling.
And the suspicion that the other boy only found it even more blissful for that pain
And now, fixing him with those clear blue eyes, eyes that ran up and down, and then down again, and they knew and he knew, and even if the eyes didn't know the shiver from his body was all too obvious.
'Severus...' The sibilance drawn out, hissing over that warm strong tongue like a snake, words enough to melt him and all down his stomach the heat, and the pain of waiting and being alone for so long.
Back then, waiting in hidden corners, secret passages. His secret, their secret, because everyone wanted Lucius Malfoy, but Lucius Malfoy only had eyes for an ugly, gangly potions-obsessive whom nobody liked
Love can be like that.
'Have you reconsidered, Severus? Tell me you've taken up my offer. We could use a man of your talents'
Talking about potions, but not talking about potions
The words are forced and late. Stuck here pinned towards the only body he's ever had, and the body and his body meeting happily in the middle in the hip region, and that painful heat still searing his muscles. He dreams about this.
Love can be cruel
'You know why I left the Order, you of all people know why I can't serve * Him *. I won't have this conversation here, Lucius'
A sharp intake of breath and then he is pressed against the opposite wall so hard and fast he gasps, and tries to block the memories of then, and what would happen next * then * but not now, not now.
'You idiot Severus! Why must you be so stubborn? I know you hate Potter. I know you resent them all, I * know * you, Severus, I know you better than anyone, I know you want this.'
'And I know you, Lucius, and what if I told what I know to your darling wife?'
'Hah!' His arms are pinned to the wall again. Looks up into his face and close and so very, very close. 'I'd leave her, Severus, I'd leave them all, we could leave this damn country behind until it's all been done, and return to the New Order as Lords.'
Whoever initiated the kiss they soon forget, because it's been too long far too long and it tastes just as good as it did then, and yet is torture, because why do this when they could do that and the other, and maybe here is a good place, here and there and *there* ...
His eyes sparkle, and Snape can see the passion. It's nice to know Lucius burns too, burns at night as the mark throbs and his groin throbs and all the dark, wonderful, terrible things taunt and tease and make him beg for more, or possibly death.
Mouth right next to his ear, whispers into the depths
'I'd kill her, Severus, and the boy, and Potter, if you asked me'
A rare profanity, he cannot help it. Pushes and tries to move away, desperate, hating himself for the self -delusion that ever let him near this man, this monster, again.
'You... You... How can you even think those things? How can you bear to be alive when you're that sick? Why in all of Hades did you have to send your boy here? Why do you come here this way and put me through this? You're cruel and twisted and why the * fuck * did I ever think that could change?'
Lucius recoils, and his eyes blaze.
'You brought this about, Severus, not me. You left me; you had a personality crisis and messed up every part of my life. Shoved me into Narcissa's arms, made me have a child I despise. You had to go running to Dumbledore like a coward'
'I can never repent. What we did was terrible. But you know that. You know all of this. There's no point in saying it all over again.'
Moves away. Forcing himself to move.
Walks down the corridor, trying not to remember how it has ended in the past, trying not to run back and into the warm arms that need him so much, trying not to be the one thing an evil bastard has ever loved.
'Look at me and tell me you don't want this! Tell me you aren't lonely and sad and old, waiting for nothing and nobody. Tell me you've forgotten all those nights. Severus!'
Trying not to be the one that loved the monster, and failed to turn him into a Prince. He thought he could change Lucius, and Lucius changed him.
Twisted him into a monster.
The voice rings savagely down the corridor
'They all hate you, you know! They loathe you, they wish you would leave. No one wants you here Severus. Go back to your infantile students and see if they ever thank you for it!'
Everyone has monsters, but it is only the select damned that are in love with theirs.