Title: A New Hope
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Michael Cutter
Fandom: Doctor Who/Law & Order
Rating: PG-13
Table: 100_tales
Prompt: 11, Sunrise
Warning: ongoing story, past non-con
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Michael Cutter, unfortunately. Please do not sue.***
The Doctor stood looking out over the city of New York, spread out before him in the grey light of dawn. It had always been an imposing city, but one that he didn't know very well. Though now that he was going to marry Michael, he would get to know it better.
This was the city where his love had been born, the city that he'd lived in all of his life until he'd joined that life with the Doctor's. He felt that he should learn more about this city, if only because it was a place that would always be dear to Mike's heart.
His lover had insisted on coming back to the city, on letting his friends know that he was engaged to the man he loved. They'd seen Mike's former boss, and some of his other friends, and accepted their congratulations. But still, they lingered here, somehow reluctant to leave.
The Doctor couldn't help wanting to go out into the city and try to find the men who had hurt his beloved, to find a way of making them face justice for what they'd done. And he couldn't help but wonder if that was part of what held Michael here, too.
He knew that his lover hadn't managed to put that part of the past behind him yet. He'd tried, and he'd done a credible job of it -- but there were times when resentment seeped through, a need to find the men who had wronged him and make them pay.
Michael would want to try them through the human justice system -- but for the Doctor, that wasn't good enough. He knew all too well how many criminals could slip through the cracks of that system, and he didn't want to see that happen. Not this time.
That was, if they ever found the men who had kidnapped and raped Mike. He sighed softly, crossing his arms over his chest. They might not even be here in New York; they were probably long gone by now, having gotten away with their crime.
He really shouldn't be standing here naked in front of the window to watch the sunrise, he thought as the first rays of bright sunlight began to arch across the city skyline. Someone could look up and see him -- or look from another one of these high-rise windows.
What did it matter if anyone saw him? A naked man shouldn't be a sight that people feared. And no one here knew him; it wasn't as though anyone would recognize him. Besides, he didn't have to be ashamed of his body. He looked good without his clothes.
But there was the human sense of propriety, the notion that being naked was somehow a bad thing. The Doctor had never believed that; it was a peculiarly human concept, this idea that nudity was shameful. Still, it was something that he usually bowed to whenever he was on Earth.
On the Tardis, he wouldn't have to do that. He'd become quite accustomed to being naked on the ship; and Mike had gotten used to it, too, even going so far as to shed his own clothes when they were there. He seemed to enjoy the freedom their nudity gave them.
This wasn't the Tardis, the Doctor reminded himself, still not turning away from the window. This was Earth. There was a different set of rules here, rules that he needed to abide by during his sojourn on this planet. He had to remember their prejudices and idiosyncracies.
He almost jumped as he felt Mike's arms slide around his waist from behind, drawing him away from his thoughts. The Doctor leaned back against his lover, closing his eyes and enjoying the feel of those warm hands moving up the front of his body.
"What are you doing up so early?" Michael asked him, nuzzling his unshaven cheek against the Doctor's. The Time Lord liked the feel of that slightly scratchy stubble against his skin; it was a feeling of strength and masculinity that he associated with his lover.
"I couldn't sleep," the Doctor told him, turning his head to nuzzle Michael's cheek with his own. It occurred to him that he needed to shave, as well, so the other man was probably feeling just as much stubble from their impromptu embrace as he was.
"And you decided to watch the sunrise over the city?" Mike asked, his voice soft. "I used to do that a lot in the mornings before I went to the office. There's something magical about a sunrise. You never know what the day is going to bring when you first see it."
"Our days in New York haven't always been good ones," the Doctor murmured, wishing that there was a better way to bring up the subject that was foremost in his mind, but knowing that there wasn't. "And I wish that there was some way to fix that."
Mike shook his head, his arms tightening around the Doctor's slim waist. "There isn't. All we can do is try to find the men who kidnapped me and make sure they're brought to justice. There's got to be some way to do that, but Lupo says the trail came to a dead end."
"The police don't know where to look now?" The Doctor scowled, his small hands curling into fists. "That makes me wonder if they've really tried to find those monsters. You would think that when a crime like that is committed against someone who works in law enforcement --"
Michael's soft words cut him off. "They did, sweetheart. They did their best. But we didn't give them much to go on. If we're going to find those guys, we'll have to do it ourselves. And I'll be honest -- I don't know where to start, unless we go back to where they were holding me."
"Are you ready to do that?" the Doctor asked, worry evident in his voice. "I know that it happened quite a while ago, but that was a traumatic experience for you, Mike. I don't want to go there and have you break down. Don't push yourself into something you aren't ready to deal with."
"I-I don't know if I'm ready to go there again," Michael admitted with a sigh. "But I have to do it sometime, Doctor. I can't keep pushing what happened to the back of my mind and trying to pretend it didn't happen. I've got to try to get some closure."
"If you don't, then you'll never be completely free of those memories," the Doctor whispered, nodding as he looked out of the window again without really seeing the glory of the unfolding sunrise. Instead, he was seeing how Michael had looked when the Doctor had rescued him.
The look in his lover's dark eyes had broken the Time Lord's hearts -- he'd never seen anyone look so terrified, so alone. Had that been the way he himself had looked when he'd been held captive time and again by the Master, and others had saved him?
He didn't really want to know the answer to that. This was about Michael, not about him. Somehow, he had to help his lover through this, help him find the men who'd taken away such a large part of his security and self-confidence. He had to help Mike put this behind him once and for all.
His gaze focused on the magnificent sunrise spreading across the glittering buildings of New York; it was beautiful, the new day dawning in a blaze of color. The Doctor drew in his hreath at the sight; he'd never seen this city looking so bright, as though it held out a new hope for them.
"I know I won't," Michael answered, his voice soft. "I want to get some closure, Doctor. I want to have some peace of mind. I don't want this anger to stay with me forever. I've seen too many people become twisted and warped because of something like this. I don't want to be one of them."
The Doctor didn't want that for his lover, either. It made him shiver to think that Mike could become like that; it would be all too easy for him to let his anger and helplessness in the face of what appeared to be an impossible situation turn him into someone he didn't want to be.
"We'll find them, love," he said softly, placing his hands over Michael's. "We'll find them, and we'll bring them to justice. You might not be working for the human justice system any more, but that could be a good thing. It gives us a little more freedom to maneuver."
Mike nodded slowly, sighing as their fingers twined together. "We'll have to plan our first move," he said, his voice gaining strength. "But it looks like that move might just be going back to where it started, where you found me that day. Don't worry. I can deal with it."
The Doctor nodded slowly, hoping that his lover was right. They would go back to that place, search for clues, and hopefully not let anything take them by surprise. Just going there might actually give Michael a sense of freedom, being able to face it without breaking down.
"All right, love," he said softly, squeezing the other man's hand. "We'll go there. Today. And we'll try to find some clue that might lead us in the right direction. I want us to be able to put this behind us for good, and start our life as a married couple without any baggage."
Mike bowed his head to brush a kiss against the Doctor's cheek, the gesture an unspoken agreement. "I want that, too," he murmured, loosening his grip on the Time Lord and stepping away. "And the best way to make that happen is to get started on the path."
The Doctor nodded, turning away from the brightly shining sun and moving towards the bathroom. He would shower and get dressed, and hopefully be ready to face the new day ahead of them and whatever surprises, good or bad, that it might decide to bring.***
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