Title: Personal Space
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Cal Lightman
Fandom: Doctor Who/Lie to Me
Rating: PG-13
Table: Buffet 2, fc_smorgasbord
Prompt: 6, Fair
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Cal Lightman, unfortunately. Please do not sue.

***

The Doctor took a deep breath, looking into the mirror over the bureau in his bedroom on the Tardis to check his appearance. Did it really matter if he looked perfect or not? Cal wasn't going to care how he looked, as long as they were together.

At least, he hoped that was how the other man still felt about him. His feelings for Cal were as strong as ever, even after their enforced separation. But after several days, Cal might have changed his mind and decided to back away from their relationship.

A shiver went through his thin frame at the thought; he closed his eyes for a moment, swallowing down the fear that Cal would do exactly that. In the past few days, he might have completely changed his mind about wanting to be with a man, much less an alien.

He didn't think that was the case; Cal wasn't the sort of man to take the commitment they'd made to each other lightly. But this wasn't a relationship that would be easy for either of them, especially for Cal. He'd have to hide so much, at least for the present.

After all, it wasn't as though Cal could easily tell people that his boyfriend wasn't around on a full-time basis because he was a Time Lord from a different planet. That would be a wonderful way to be sure that he was locked away where the Doctor might never find him.

It wasn't even feasible, at the moment, for him to tell anyone that he was in a relationship with a man. The Doctor wasn't sure if that was something that would be well-received by the people who worked for him, but Cal had intimated that it wouldn't be.

And then, of course, there was the question of his daughter. It wouldn't be easy for Cal to tell her that he was involved with a man; she might be all right with it once she got used to the idea, but it also migh go over like a lead balloon with her.

He certainly didn't want to make life any more difficult for Cal than it already was -- so he'd decided to let his lover be the one who moved the relationship forward, no matter how hard it was for him to play the waiting game. He would, if that was what it took to keep them together.

If Cal didn't want them to be together any more .... well, there would be nothing he could do about it. He wasn't going to show the other man how hurt he was if that happened; he would merely smile and agree that they could still be friendly, without making any sort of commitment.

He would wait until he was safely back in the Tardis and away from Earth before he let his emotions out. And he very seriously doubted that he would ever see Cal again if the other man made the choice to sever their relationship. It would hurt far too much.

But none of this had happened yet, the Doctor reminded himself as he left his bedroom and hurried down the corridor to the control room. It was all in his mind; for all he knew, Cal would be waiting at the café they'd decided to meet at to welcome him with open arms.

He hoped that was the case; he'd been unable to think of anything other than the man he was fast falling in love with over the past few days. He'd tried to turn his thoughts away from Cal Lightman, but somehow, they always seemed to circle back when he wasn't expecting it.

There was nothing he could do at this point but hope for the best -- that Cal was missing him just as much, and would be glad to see him. Sighing, he headed down the short flight of steps and to the door, pulling it open and stepping out of the ship.

The Doctor blinked as he set foot on the pavement, unable to believe his eyes. Was he really seeing what he thought he was, or was he having some sort of hallucination? It didn't seem possible, but maybe his dreams really were coming true.

Cal was sitting on the park bench right across from the stretch of sidewalk that the Doctor had just stepped onto. He cocked his head to one side, then leaned back, spreading his arms across the back of the bench with a smile and a nod at the Time Lord.

"Hello, love," he said softly, holding out a hand to the Doctor. "Don't stand there with your mouth hanging open. Sit down here and tell me how you've been, and if you missed me as much as I've missed you. And if you still want to go get a cup of coffee."

The Doctor moved across the sidewalk to sit down beside Cal as if he was in a daze; he hadn't expected to see his lover at the moment he'd stepped from the Tardis into the sunlight. He'd thought that he would have to meet Cal in a crowded café, that they wouldn't be alone.

Well, they weren't completely alone here, he thought; there were people walking by at intervals, but no one seemed to take any notice of two men sitting on a park bench, staring at each other, their hands clasped so tightly that their knuckles had gone white.

It seemed lik a long time before he could find words; even then, he wasn't sure of what he wanted to say. When he finally spoke, the Doctor's words tumbled out with no forethought; he was surprised to hear what he was saying, but he couldn't stop himself.

"I didn't think you would want to see me again," he whispered, not looking at Cal. "I thought you would have decided that you couldn't keep seeing a man, let alone an alien. I thought you would decide that it was all too difficulat and walk away from me."

Cal shook his head, leaning forward and studying the Doctor's face. "You really did think that, didn't you?" he said softly, his gaze searching the Time Lord's. "You thought I'd leave you because you aren't like everybody else in my world."

The Doctor nodded, feeling miserable. He hated the fact that he hadn't had more faith in Cal; he wouldn't blame his lover if he was disgusted by that, if he got to his feet and walked away without another word. He shouldn't want to be with someone who didn't have complete faith in him.

He wanted to look away from that searching gaze, but he couldn't. Cal's eyes held him mesmerized, the gentle look in those eyes quite different from what he'd expected to see. There was no anger there, no resentment, only love and concern.

"I wouldn't have done that to you," Cal told him, squeezing his hand. His voice was still soft, the words meant only for the Doctor's ears, but his tone was strong and steady. "It might not be an easy road we're on, but I wouldn't give you up, Doctor."

The Time Lord looked up, meeting Cal's gaze and blinking in surprise. "So what do we do now? Hope that being with each other once in a while like this is going to be enough? Because I don't think it will be. One of us is going to get tired of it sooner or later."

Cal shook his head, frowning. "I don't think so, love. I don't want to be in a relationship where I'm tied down to a routine -- going to work by day, being with my significant other at night. And I know you're not going to stop wandering the galaxy. It's what you do."

The Doctor nodded, feeling hope start to burgeon in his hearts. Maybe Cal would be willing to go on like this -- with the strings attached. They might not be with each other every day, but did they really need to be as long as their hearts were connected?

"It doesn't seem fair to you," he began, only to have Cal reach out a hand and place a finger on his lips, shaking his head slowly. He had no idea what his lover would say; without realizing it, he was holding his breath as he waited for Cal's next words.

"It's fair to both of us," Cal said, running his fingers through the Doctor's hair. "Neither of us wants to be with anyone else, but I think we'd get bored with a relationship that's too predictable. So this is perfect for both of us. We have each other, and our personal space as well."

"By personal space, do you mean that you'll be seeing other people too?" the Doctor asked, unable to stop the question from coming out. He looked away, unable to meet Cal's eyes. If that wasn't what his lover meant to do, he'd feel horrible for asking.

"No!" Cal's voice was louder than it had been, his tone almost shocked. "Do you seriously think that after being with you, I'd want to make love to anyone else?" He reached out to cup the Doctor's chin, turning the Time Lord's face to look at him.

"I'm not interested in anybody else, love," he said softly, his gaze holding the Doctor's steadily. "I don't want anyone in my bed but you. I don't want a woman, I don't want another man. Not for even one night, one hour, one second. I want you. No one else."

The Doctor nodded, a wave of relief washing over him. Cal wasn't ready to give up on them, as he'd feared. They were still as strong as ever -- and judging from his lover's words, Cal was more emotionally invested in their relationship than the Doctor had realized.

"You're all I want, too," he managed to say, his voice feeling constricted in his throat. There was really nothing else to say; those few syllables said everything that was in his hearts, and he was sure that the expression on his face told Cal how happy he was.

"Come on," Cal said, smiling and standing up. He tugged at the Doctor's hand, pulling the other man to his feet. "Let's get to that coffee shop. I think we could both use a cup of coffee -- and then we can come back to the Tardis and spend some time together."

The Doctor privately thought that they could just as well skip the coffee, but if that was what Cal wanted, then he was more than willing to go along with it. It might not be fair that they couldn't be together all the time, but they were going to make the most of what time they did have.

***