Title: Trade My Life
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: John Reese/Jordan Hester
Fandom: Person of Interest
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely John Reese or Jordan Hester, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

***

John looked over at Jordan, sleeping peacefully in his bed.

For some reason, their lovemaking tonight had seemed more intense than it had ever been. They had seemed closer to each other than ever, more desperate to share their bodies.

He couldn't help but that on his part, that desperation had been born out of the talk he'd had with Harold about Jordan's presence in his life.

Harold was right about one thing -- being involved with him put Jordan in danger. There were always people who could target him, and who would see Jordan as a way to get to him. He didn't like the idea that his boyfriend lived with that kind of cloud over his head every day.

Well, Jordan didn't, because he didn't think of things like that. It was he himself who had to deal with that cloud, and it was one that never quite went away.

He hated to admit that Harold was right in even one of his prejudices against Jordan, but he couldn't deny that one day, he and his boyfriend would run out of luck.

The thought made him shudder. He didn't want to countenance it.

But he had no choice, John told himself with a sigh as he got up and went into the kitchen. He took a bottle of water out of the fridge, opening it as he leaned against the counter.

Maybe there would come a time when he couldn't keep Jordan safe -- and then what would he do? He might be caught in a situation that put him between the proverbial rock and a hard place.

He'd been in those situations before, he reflected, and they never came out well. He didn't want to deal with that again, though he knew that given what he was doing for a living, he really didn't have a choice there, either. He had to deal with whatever situations might happen to come up in his life.

And he knew one thing -- if anything happened to Jordan, the people who dared to lay a finger on him would be dead. No one was going to touch his lover and live.

If worst came to worst, he would trade his life for Jordan's. He would sacrifice himself so that the man he loved could live. Nothing was more important than keeping Jordan safe.

Harold simply didn't understand the deep love that he and Jordan shared. He might have loved Grace, and he might have disappeared from her life to keep her safe, but in the end, John didn't think that he really understood love. He'd run from it, rather than having the balls to stay and take risks.

All right, so maybe he was being unfair. But Harold really didn't seem to understand how he felt about Jordan, didn't seem to realize that Jordan was what kept him going, kept him alive.

With Jordan, he could see a future. One that he didn't want to lose.

He wouldn't let that future slip away from the two of them. It meant too much to him. Now that he finally had the sort of future he'd dreamed of, he would hold on to it.

Before Jordan had come into his life and he'd fallen head over heels in love, he'd never let himself so much as hope for a future. He'd never dreamed of one. He'd always pushed the idea away.

But now, that future was within his grasp, and he would do everything in his power to protect it. Though if he had to, he would sacrifice himself to ensure that Jordan had a future, that his life would go on. He'd trade his life for Jordan's in a second. He wouldn't even have to think about what he was doing.

He just hoped that things wouldn't come to that. He'd have to hope that he could keep Jordan safe, and that the man he loved would never be caught in the crosshairs.

Sighing softly, John finished the water, tossing the bottle into the trash can before he went back into his bedroom and slipped beneath the covers, wrapping his arms around his sleeping lover.

He closed his eyes, though he knew would once again be elusive.

***