Pairing: John Reese/Jordan Hester
Fandom: Person of Interest
Table: 1, stories_a_z
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely John Reese or Jordan Hester, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.
***Jordan gasped as his body arched up against John's, his arms winding around the other man's neck to pull him close. Every time they made love, the sensations were more pronounced, more intense; he wasn't sure how much longer he could hold himself back.
As though John knew what he was thinking, he slowed his pace, pulling out excruciatingly slowly as he gazed into Jordan's eyes, then thrusting back into him just as slowly and deeply, wringing a soft cry from Jordan's lips with every movement of his body.
John claimed him each and every time they made love, putting his mark on Jordan's heart and soul as well as his body. He knew that there was no way he could ever be with anyone else after John; he belonged to this man, for the rest of his life, into eternity.
No one else could ever make him feel the way John did; no one could wring these emotions from his heart. He had always held himself aloof from every other lover he'd ever had; no one had ever seen into his heart in the way that John did. He'd never let anyone scale the walls he'd built up.
Even before he'd had to deal with the case of identity theft that John had helped him get through, he had been a loner, always having a hard time letting anyone in. Those walls didn't come down easily; most of the time, they never came down at all.
The identity theft had only made him withdraw more into his self-imposed shell; John had been the first person who he'd ever trusted enough to open himself to completely. When he was with John, he felt opened, exposed, as though he was getting close to someone for the first time.
When he was with John, naked and vulnerable, their bodies joined together in a primal embrace, he didn't stop to think about the dangers of letting someone into his life and his heart. All he could think of was how badly he wanted this man -- and how much he loved John.
He could no sooner extricate himself from this relationship than he could reach into his own chest and rip out his heart and expect to keep living and breathing; John Reese was the breath of life to him, the one person in the world who he couldn't live without.
In the past, he would have held back from letting anyone get this close to him, but with John, all of his usual caution fell by the wayside. This man was a part of him; they belonged together, brought to each other by a fate that had, for once, seemed to smile on them both.
Jordan gasped as John thrust hard and deep inside him again, his long legs tightening around his lover's waist. He was close to the edge, so close; he could sense that John was nearly there, too, and he wanted them both to tumble over that precipice at the same time.
Part of him wanted to make this last longer, but another wanted to soar into the clouds with John, to let his body find a shuddering release and float gently back to the ground in the arms of the man he loved. He was caught between the two extremes, unsure of which he wanted more.
He gasped when the next thrust came, his body arching upwards again. Each movement of the other man's hips brought him closer to that precipice; he would fall from that dizzying height at any moment. His body was ready to take that plunge, taut, trembling, ready to let go.
One more thrust, another soft cry dragged from his throat, and he was falling, tumbling from the lofty heights that John had taken him to, spinning as he fell, his senses reeling, fireworks seeming to explode all through his body as he held on to John like a drowning man clutching at a life raft.
When Jordan opened his eyes again, John was leaning over him, a slight smiling curving those luscious lips, his gaze riveted on Jordan's face. He couldn't tell what thoughts were behind that enigmatic gaze, but he could clearly see the love written on John's features.
Jordan raised a shaky hand to stroke gentle fingertips down John's cheek, almost unable to believe that this man was here with him. How could he have fallen in love so deeply, so quickly, without any warning as to how intense his feelings would become?
When he'd first met John, before his identity crisis had been resolved and he'd settled back into his life, he had felt as though he was drifting, unclaimed, lost at sea. Now, he knew exactly where he belonged, and where he wanted to be. There was no doubt, no hesitation.
He wanted to say three words so badly, but he wasn't sure if they would chase John away from him, out of their bed and into his clothes. He knew that John cared for him -- he'd proved that many times over -- but he had a hard time putting his emotions into words.
And he also had a hard time accepting the fact that his love was returned. Jordan didn't know what ghosts lingered in his boyfriend's mind that made it so hard for him to believe that he could be loved, but whatever they were, he was determined to banish them for good.
The problem was knowing just how to do that. He didn't want to say anything that might make John feel uncomfortable, but he couldn't hold the words back. They came to the surface far too easily, whether he felt that he should say them or not.
"I love you," he whispered, his voice so soft that he was sure John had to strain to hear him. He almost held his breath as soon as the words were out of his mouth, hoping that he wouldn't feel John's body stiffen and pull away from him. That wasn't what those words were intended to do.
It seemed as though John wasn't gong to answer, but after a moment, his soft voice filled the room, saying words that Jordan had thought he wouldn't hear for a very long time. "I love you, too," he said, the words going straight to Jordan's heart and lodging there.
John loved him. He'd said it, so he had to mean it. He had known that John had deep feelings for him, of course; he'd never doubted that, not from the beginning of their relationship. But to hear the words actually spoken -- that was something altogether different.
"I know I don't tell you that often enough," John continued, his voice still very soft and husky with emotion. "But I do feel it, Jordan. I wouldn't be here with you if I didn't. Don't ever doubt my love for you, even if you don't always hear me say those words."
"I won't," Jordan managed to whisper around the lump that had suddenly developed in his throat. He wasn't unclaimed and unwanted any longer. He wasn't adrift in an endless sea, with no rock to cling to that would always be there. He was where he belonged.
Maybe John felt the same way he did, Jordan mused. Maybe he, too, felt as though he was unclaimed, as if he needed the structure and security of having someone to loved, someone who loved him and wanted to be with him. He wouldn't be at all surprised if that was the case.
John might seem like someone who was used to being on his own, and who even wanted to be that way -- but Jordan had seen glimpses of the man underneath that mask, the man who was looking down at him now. The man who wanted -- and needed -- his love.
Slowly, hesitantly, he tried to articulate his feelings. "John ...." he began, swallowing hard, unsure of just what to say. "When I first met you, when we first started this relationship, I felt like I was .... unclaimed. As if nobody would ever want me, even with my identity back in place."
"You shouldn't feel like that," John told him, his voice full of compassion. "I can't imagine anybody not wanting you, Jordan. But I understand how you feel. It's hard to deal with coming back to a life that you'd thought was behind you forever."
Jordan nodded, though he wasn't entirely sure that John knew just what he meant. "I don't feel like that any more. And I've got the feeling that you've felt the same way for a long time -- for different reasons. I don't want you to feel like you're unclaimed, either."
"I haven't, since I've been with you," John said softly, raising a hand to stroke Jordan's cheek. "Whenever I'm with you, I feel like I've finally come home. You give me an oasis in an ocean of troubled waters, Jordan. I hope the two of us will always have that safe harbor."
"You'll always have that with me," Jordan told him, his own voice a little unsteady. He had never expected to be loved like this -- much less by an incredible man like John Reese. This was beyond his wildest dreams, something that he'd never thought he could have.
Yet John was here, in his bed, holding him in those strong arms and telling him that he was loved. Could anything possibly be better than this? Jordan didn't think so; he was sure that he had reached the pinnacle happiness. He only hoped that he could manage to stay there.
"And you'll always be safe and loved with me," John answered, leaning down to brush his lips gently across Jordan's. Jordan could feel his pulse leap and race at the contact; suddenly, all he could think of was John kissing him, pulling him closer, making love to him again.
He was no longer unclaimed. He would never have to feel alone and adrift again, not as long as he had John in his life and in his heart. As their kiss deepened from tenderness to passion, Jordan gave himself over to the rising tide of desire, hoping that it would never have to end.
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