Title: Past, Present, Future
Author: martyred-wings
Rating: NC-17
Genre and/or Pairing: slash, Dean/Castiel
Spoilers: For 5x04
Warnings: Spoilers for 5x04, m/m action
Word Count: 3668 words
Summary: Dean ponders the future, thinks of the past and makes a request in the present.


Dean sat alone, in the motel room, thinking over all that he'd seen, all he'd borne witness to during his brief trip to the future, and felt cold, weary, worn out. He hated the visions he'd seen, hated the way things had turned out, hated to see Lucifer possessing his own brother, deeming Sam aloof, cold, inaccessible to Dean.

He shuddered, remembered once more the sight of his brother in a pure white suit, looking deceptively pure and innocent, charming while saying the most evil things. Dean blinked, tears shimmering unchecked in his eyes, couldn't bear the thought of Sam, his Sammy carrying that monster inside him, letting it ride him, consume him with its evil taint. He saw again the memory of Sam standing on his future self's neck, pressing ever downwards until Dean's neck had broken. The complete lack of emotion on Sam's - Lucifer's - face had been unnerving, upsetting, unnatural. Dean knew that if he let things go that route, he'd have to kill him, kill his own brother, and the hunter knew that that one action would kill him too.

He remembered once again his future self, how determined he'd been, cold, sadistic, seemingly without care for another person. Dean turned away from the memory, didn't like even thinking of what he had become, knew that it was the circumstances, the regret over not saying yes to Michael and the subsequent fall out that had changed him.

Dean blinked again, memories shifting once more, remembered how Castiel had been acting, free, easy, revelling in debauchery, halfway to being stoned and inebriated at all moments. He wasn't acting like himself, wasn't Dean's Cas anymore. He was unshaven, unkempt, like he didn't care any more, and perhaps he didn't. The way he'd started talking when Dean and he had been alone certainly seemed to indicate that Castiel had lost hope, felt like he had nothing left to live for, nothing left worth fighting for. He'd given up, all because he'd been abandoned by the angels when they'd returned to Heaven, leaving him there, cut off from them, his place in Heaven, his powers, leaving him stranded and alone and mortal.

The hunter thought again of the wasted world he'd walked through, the infected people that were more like rabid animals, rampaging zombies than the humans they were supposed to be, remembered the filth, the devastation that had surrounded them all. It had been a depressing place to spend any amount of time in, even under duress. It was a world without hope, a world without a future, a world he wasn't even sure he wanted to save, unless things could be changed.

Even when he'd returned to his own time, faced Zachariah, and was offered the same conditions of accepting Michael, letting him in, Dean had still said no. The hunter hated himself for it, was determined to not let things turn out the way they had, was determined to find an alternative route than becoming Michael's vessel, and ultimately destroying himself in the process.

There had to be another way. There always was.

He sighed, felt the weight of the world and all of his decisions weighing down on his shoulders, turned his face to the cracked ceiling above him, as though seeking guidance, but not from Michael. Michael would be a last resort. His mind wandered over how he'd been pulled away from Zachariah by Castiel himself, left them both standing by the side of a moonlit road, as though waiting for a ride. He smiled at Castiel's remark of how they'd had an appointment, of Dean's plea to Castiel to never change, the almost smile that had crossed the angel's face at that.

A flicker of a smile finally crossed over Dean's face, at the thought of Castiel watching over him, smiled again at once more being reunited with Sam. He saw again in his mind's eye how he'd offered the knife back to his brother, had vowed to himself that he would protect Sam from Lucifer as best he could. He blinked, came back to the present and it was good. It was all he had, and he had the power to change things if he could, in the present.

He cleared his throat, shifted on his seat, wondered if Sam had finished up with Bobby yet, shifted again and looked up when he felt another's presence in the room with him.

"Hey, Cas," Dean said, smiling at the angel standing patiently by his side.

The hunter reached out, took Castiel's hand between his gentle fingers and caressed his palm lovingly. He'd missed Castiel while he was away, had felt his absence more keenly than he would a knife. Even though he'd liked the new version of Castiel well enough - he wasn't his Castiel, the Castiel he'd fallen in love with. Dean raised the angel's hand to his lips, kissed his knuckles gently, lips lingering upon the sensitive skin for an all too brief moment.

"Hello, Dean," Castiel replied, as he sat across from Dean, on the hunter's own bed, large blue eyes attentive, patient, loving.

"You alright?" Dean asked, not sure why he was even asking, just asking anyway.

"Yes. You?" Castiel responded.

"Yeah," Dean replied, before falling silent.

He glanced up at the ever watchful Castiel, before he said - "I'm glad you pulled me away from Zachariah, you know. I'm glad you came back for me."

Castiel merely shrugged, as though saying "of course." Dean fell silent once more, blinking into the gloom of the room, didn't know what to say next to fill the ever present silence. It was Castiel himself that broke it, voice gentle, yet still gruff as it cut through the air.

"What would you have me do, Dean? How can I make you feel better?" he asked, head tilted to one side as though trying to understand something he didn't yet.

"Nothing, Cas. Just stay with me okay? That's all I need," Dean replied, getting up from the chair to sit beside his angel, who watched him closely.

Dean smiled, caught a typically mysterious smile in Castiel's deep blue eyes, before he brushed his fingers through Castiel's hair. He leant forward, pressed a tender kiss to the angel's soft mouth, received a kiss in return. He felt Castiel's hand slip beneath his shirt, long fingers trailing over the thin material of his t shirt, murmured a note of approval at the contact. A sudden thought flitted across Dean's memories, and he pulled away, grinning at the angel. Castiel tilted his head once more, inquisitive smile lighting his features as though asking what was funny.

"Actually there is something you can do for me, Cas," the hunter said, still smiling, his eyes lighting up with amusement, as he thought of a past escapade with a girl called Rhonda Hurley when Dean had been nineteen.

He leant forward, whispered his request in Castiel's ear, expected a refusal, maybe for Castiel to hit him, something. Instead Castiel smiled, that mysterious lifting of his lips, that trapped star light in his gaze, made him look more human in that one instant, more touchable, accessible.

"As you wish, Dean," Castiel replied, his voice gruff, intimate, agreeable, not in the least offended by the request.

Dean grinned, couldn't stop the delight, the expectation from coiling through his body, the sudden lust that roared like a beast through his veins at the upcoming promise of seeing Castiel wearing panties. He remembered how he'd loved wearing Rhonda Hurley's panties when he was nineteen, felt again the lacy tightness against him, loved the look in Rhonda's eyes when she'd looked at him. He tried to imagine how Castiel would look while wearing a similar pair of panties, couldn‘t wait to see if his mental image matched up to the reality.

"Yeah? No argument? Don't think it a bit - kinky?" Dean questioned, gazing into Castiel's eyes, trying to see if it was truly what the angel wanted.

He pulled away, saw the lust trapped deep within his lover's eyes, knew that Castiel was interested, intrigued by the proposition, knew that Castiel really did want to do this.

"No, Dean. It's what you want, and I want to make you happy," Castiel responded, eyes telling a different story, that he wanted to be happy too.

Dean wondered why, all of a sudden, Castiel was being so biddable, wanted to do what Dean wanted, decided against questioning a good thing. He'd seen what Castiel could become in the future, was determined to prevent that from happening. Anything he could do to spare Castiel that he would. Suddenly this was more about Castiel‘s needs, than his own wants.

He leant forward, claimed Castiel's mouth in a needy kiss, tongue sliding into Castiel's mouth and licking inside sensuously. Breath blasted from nostrils, tickling against heated skin, played across each other's cheeks and ruffled in their hair. Dean leant in, fingers lacing through Castiel's soft hair, groaned against the feel of the angel's soft lips beneath his own, felt his need consume him, until there was nothing left but desire. He held his breath for a moment, revelled in the feel of Castiel's soft, silken lips working against his own, at the responsiveness of Castiel's mouth, at how Castiel's hands gently caressed Dean's body, skimming over his ass intimately.

He pulled away, saw Castiel lean in to steal another kiss, lips pouting in kiss swollen redness, eyes half closed as he claimed another kiss. The kiss ended once more, and Dean leant his forehead against the angel's shoulder, arms trailing around his waist to hold on tightly, never wanting to let him go. He needed Castiel, never wanted him to leave his side, felt Castiel's fingers gently stroke the nape of his neck, caressing the sensitive skin to send shivers through Dean's body.

Castiel exhaled gently, breath ruffling against Dean's ear, before he said quietly - "I need to go for a time. Tell me what panties you want, and I'll be back shortly."

Dean blushed suddenly, couldn't believe this was happening, leant forward to whisper his choice in the angel's ear, before Castiel disappeared, ghosting from Dean's grasp on wings of shadow. Dean had never felt so suddenly alone as he did in that one instant. His shoulders slumped and he stared at the floor beneath his feet, tried not to think of Lucifer riding Sam's body, tried instead to think of what Castiel would like in lacy panties.

He looked up, surprised at Castiel's swift return, wondered why he was even surprised. Castiel was known for his sudden disappearances and just as swift returns. The hunter frowned at Castiel, suspicious at the lack of panties held between slender fingers.

"I have them on, Dean," Castiel stated, patiently, as though reading Dean's mind.

Dean's eyes flickered, tongue unconsciously licking out over his full lower lip, wanted to strip Castiel as fast as he could so he could have a look. He stood, wordlessly, closed the distance between them, slid the angel's trench coat from slender shoulders. He leant in, nibbled gently at Castiel's exposed neck, suckled a bruise into the tender skin to mark Castiel further as his. His arousal grew, scented the air heavily to match Castiel's mirroring emotions.

Castiel's fingers skimmed teasingly over Dean's erect dick, bringing him to full arousal with one swift movement, made Dean groan against his neck, vibrations from Dean's lips shuddering through his body. His large blue eyes closed, lips parted, as he felt Dean's hands slowly slide his jacket from around his shoulders, easing it to the floor with one fluid movement. He turned his face to Dean's begged with encouraging little purls of need for another kiss, received one in searing intensity from Dean's willing mouth.

Castiel rested his hands upon Dean's hips, fingers tracing lazy circles against the skin hidden beneath t shirt, as his lover slowly removed his tie. Castiel murmured, a note of purring arousal following soon after, as Dean's fingers slowly unbuttoned the angel's shirt, fingers caressing against bare angelic skin with every sweep and pass. Dean murmured out his approval when his fingers brushed against his own amulet strung around the angel's neck, pulling away to smile down at it.

"So that's where you keep it," he murmured in approval, before Castiel reached for him once more, eagerly, showing rare impatience for Dean to do something.

Dean chuckled again, leant forward to suckle another bruise on Castiel's neck, overlaying the first with rapt attention, as he eased Castiel's shirt from his body, left it laying in the floor at their feet. The hunter's hands dropped to Castiel's ass, fingers digging in to make his lover whimper, before he caressed his ass lovingly, tenderly, erections grinding together beneath restrictive material. Dean hastily unbuckled Castiel's belt, couldn't wait much longer to see the panties on his lover's body, pulled Castiel's pants down just as hastily.

He looked down, groaned aloud at the black laced panties that Castiel was wearing, breath catching in his throat at the sight of the angel's erection straining against the restrictive material, pre-cum already staining the front of them in a wet patch. Dean knelt before him, still fully clothed, to nuzzle at Castiel's erection eagerly, kissing the tip of the angel's dick through the sheer material.

He heard Castiel whimper above him, felt the angel's fingers dig into his shoulders, painfully twisting his tender flesh as his tongue lapped at the straining material teasingly. Dean's gaze drifted up Castiel's naked body, smiled when he saw the angel's aroused expression, eyes closed, ripe lips swollen and parted as his lover bucked his hips against Dean in an impatient gesture.

Dean chuckled, mouthed at the head of Castiel's cock through the panties, heard Castiel purr loudly in undisguised want, need, lust, everything that he wanted to hear fall from those sensuous lips. He suckled the material deeper into his mouth, tasted Castiel's pre-cum heavy on his tongue, drew the angel's dick as far as he could into his mouth. His tongue laved against lacy material, against the sensitive skin beneath, toying with Castiel, to draw him on for longer.

"Please," Castiel murmured, fingers twitching against Dean's shoulders. "Please, Dean."

Dean's fingers slowly hooked around the slight waist band of the lacy panties, snagged them down in slow sweeps of questing fingers, letting Castiel's erection curl free towards his abdomen. Dean was tempted, leant forward to take Castiel's straining member into his mouth, took him in deep and heard his lover cry out expectantly.

He slowly suckled at the head, tongue lapping and flattening against the underside of his dick, felt the shudders working their way through his lover's body. He slowly took him in deeper, salty pre-cum and the taste of Castiel himself weighing as heavily upon his tongue as his dick. Dean's breath blasted from his nose, tickled across Castiel's erection as a small frown of concentration furrowed Dean's brow as he worked to pleasure his lover. His fingers dug into first Castiel's thighs, then his ass when the hunter shifted his hands, his own body to get a better angle.

He suckled eagerly, heard Castiel's breathing change, become more labored, deeper, mingled with murmurs of arousal leaking past temptingly full lips above him. He pulled away, heard Castiel's indignant response above him, smiled as he straightened to , remove his own clothes as swiftly as his eager fingers would allow him to.

"Get on the bed, Cas," Dean said, ignoring the indignant look stamped clearly on his lover's face.

Castiel went willingly, obeying Dean's words without question, shifting slightly against the bed once he was settled down upon it. The light thrown down from above glinted casually from Dean's amulet around Castiel's neck, seemed to make the metal glow for an instant, before the light was gone. Dean reached down, retrieved Castiel's tie from the pile of abandoned clothes littered around his feet, before he climbed onto the bed beside Castiel.

He leant down, claimed a kiss from Castiel's pliant mouth, felt the angel purr in contentment as he felt Dean tie his hands above his head, securing his wrists to the bedposts. Castiel shifted, tested his bonds, knew that he could slip them but remained bonded, a willing servant to Dean's whims. He smiled, remembered the times before when he'd been restrained with his own tie, felt again the adrenaline rush of extreme arousal coursing through his veins. He closed his eyes, thought of how Dean could touch him and not be touched in return, every sense, every emotion heightened by the experience.

Dean watched Castiel, eyes resting heavily upon his lover's body, as the angel's eyelashes fluttered against his cheeks, lips pouting sensuously in expectant need. The hunter's gaze travelled over the smooth expanse of skin laid bare before him, tempting him to claim his lover, cover his body with his own and take him, ride him, fill him with his come.

Dean's breath caught in his throat at the beauty of Castiel, tempting him ever onwards and he hastily reached for the lube in the bag flung beneath the bed some time before. He dropped it before he managed to uncap it, picked it from the floor, before he squeezed some of the viscous fluid over eager fingers, over eager palm. He spread Castiel's legs wider, knelt between them and watched as the angel's eyes drifted slowly open to watch him. Castiel angled his hips ever wider, giving Dean better access for what he wanted to do. Dean smiled, hunger evident in his heavy gaze, as his fingers played slowly across the tight ring of muscles surrounding Castiel's hole.

The angel whimpered, lips trembling as he writhed against he stirring of pleasure coursing through his body, whimpers of arousal squeezing past suddenly clenched teeth as Dean eased a finger inside Castiel's hole. Dean moaned at the tight feel of Castiel wrapping against his finger, felt the reluctance of Castiel's muscles threatening to reject his advances. He waited until Castiel relaxed slowly around him, before he pressed home his advantage, easing Castiel ever wider, ever looser.

Castiel's hips lifted from the bed, groans of need filling the air as Dean found his prostate, stroked gently across its muscled surface, watched as the angel fucked himself onto Dean's hand willingly. He added another finger, stretched him still further, made kittenish mewls of arousal burst from his lover's mouth, getting louder, more insistent the linger Dean stroked his prostate.

The hunter slowly pulled his fingers from his lover's body, smoothed lube over his palm, eagerly swept the liquid over his erection, enjoying the feel of his own hand surrounding his dick. He craved Castiel's warmth, his body, craved pleasuring his lover and receiving pleasure in return. His breath caught in his throat, caught the expression of want in Castiel's eyes, before he covered his lover's body with his own, felt Castiel's warmth, his skin beneath his.

Dean's eyes closed, lips parted, as he eased his cock inside Castiel's tight warmth, velvet surrounding him in a snug fit and he waited until Castiel's muscles relaxed around him before he fully sheathed himself inside Castiel. A murmur of arousal fell from his lips as he felt Castiel's tight warmth surround him in its dry heat, sensuous, pleasurable, right. He started to thrust inside his angel, felt shudders of pleasure course through his lover's body, felt his own mirroring shudders of pleasure rock through him.

Dean's hands grappled at Castiel's sides, latched onto his thighs and shifted to get a better position. He thrust harder, felt the shift of tension in Castiel's body beneath him as he hit against Castiel's prostate with every other sweep and pass and needy thrust. He watched as Castiel's eyes flew open wider, watched as his back arched from the bed, fucking himself desperately upon Dean's dick, purling mewls of pleasure bursting from kiss swollen, pouting lips.

Castiel's heels dug into Dean's ass, pushed him deeper into his own body, wanted to touch him with his hands but couldn't. He loved the feeling of everything seeming more intense through being denied the sense of touch, and he writhed beneath Dean, cries falling helplessly from his lips as he felt Dean moving inside him. He moaned, a long guttural note of aroused pleasure, clenched tight around Dean's cock, felt something give and Dean came, filled him with his release as the hunter shouted for him, body shuddering against his. Castiel felt Dean's fingers wrap around his dick, stroke the angel to his completion and Castiel came, filled Dean's hand with his release, with a scream of his lover's name.

Eyes blind and turned towards the ceiling, Castiel settled upon the bed, hands still held tight above his head with his own tie, and he shuddered when he felt Dean ease his dick from his body, gently kiss the angel's lips before settling himself beside him. Dean reached up, finally freed Castiel's wrists from his bonds, rubbed the wrists for Castiel to encourage blood flow once more.

Castiel settled himself into Dean's cradling arms, eyes blinking owlishly, sleepily up at the ceiling before Dean finally broke the silence hanging heavily between them.

"Don't you ever change, Cas," he murmured, fingers caressing the angel's slightly stubbled cheek.

Castiel merely smiled, eyes slightly warmer, as he settled further into Dean's embrace. Neither spoke again, their breathing perfectly matched, as Dean caressed Castiel, watched as the angel slowly drifted into sated sleep in his arms. His fingers ghosted over the amulet Castiel still wore around his neck, wondered briefly, almost jokingly whether it was the power of his own amulet that made Castiel so biddable, so willing to follow Dean's requests. The hunter shook his head, laughed at his own folly, before settling down once more, arms wrapped ever more closely around Castiel's body. Dean laid one last kiss upon Castiel's cheek, before sleep claimed him in its heavy embrace ....