Title: Nightmares Revealed
Author: Lil Jei
Pairing: Gabriel/Dean & Implied Dean/Castiel
Fandom: Supernatural
Rating: PG-13 possibly R
A/N: For a prompt over at Dean_Slash...Possible Gabriel/Dean Now. Implied Dean/Castiel Then.
Gabriel (or Gabriel and Castiel) find out some things about Dean's childhood they wished they hadn't...
Warnings: Past child abuse. Un-Beta'd. WiP.
Summary: Once a truth is learned it can't be unlearned.***
Night Of.
Gabriel had been back from the dead all of a month and he had already managed to screw it up. As soon as he had risen Lazurus style straight from the grave he'd known that everything had gone wrong. Not that the apocalypse hadn't threatened to be bad enough but now there was no heavenly presence on earth whatsoever and nothing left of Castiel either. Pride goeth before the fall their father had once said and Castiel had fallen victim to that very sin. So instead of going back up the heavens or finding some pagans to party around with he''d decidedly do the dumbest thing he could think of...go to the Winchesters.
A fat lot of good that had done him. He'd been shot in the face with cleaning products and poked and prodded for what felt like ever before they believed him. He knew that his reappearance had hit them like a punch to the gut...why him and not Cas? Those thoughts had hurt but then he'd known a long time ago that Cas and Dean had a profound bond as they liked to call it. Not so much anymore though Gabriel liked to think to himself in the more bleaker moments of Dean's depression.
He had known that Castiel had helped the eldest brother sleep through the night, he'd even peeked in on them in some of his more curious moments. But he had no idea why until tonight when he'd gone and screwed up. He'd gone onto their next mission to scope out the location...angel & pagan powers had to be good for something now. And he'd come back late and disgusted even more so than normal with humanity. But when he'd arrived to the hotel room Sam wasn't there...he used to enjoy "his bond" with Sam alot more before his death than he did now. The bond was practically gone due to the stark raving crazy Sam had going on these days. Gabriel felt bad for the kid but he knew he'd brought it on himself and whatever Castiel and Death had done to the kids head was beyond even an archangel to fix-though he had tried.
So with Sam gone all he had to do now was watch Dean-o sleep some. That's when he had noticed Dean-o wasn't sleeping to easy and smelt way to much like a brewery for his liking. He'd known the battles with the Leviathans hadn't been easy and then the recent run in with the Amazons hadn't helped but jeeze maybe the kid needed an AA meeting or two to sort himself out. Before Gabriel could stop himself the curious side of him, the trickster side decided to take over. He'd decided to meddle a bit and surf the kid's dreams. And now that he had he wanted to do the human thing and puke up all the candy he'd eaten today.
------Dreamscape-----
As soon as he landed in the dream he knew it wasn't just a dream but was a perverted memory of sorts. And that he was just the audience to whatever drama Dean's head had concocted. Gabriel was standing there watching a younger Dean and Sam sleep peacefully when all of a sudden the door slammed open and a drunken John Winchester tumbled in the doorway. He roughly started shaking Dean and whispering to him. Dean had woken when the door slammed open and Gabriel could only watch as Dean was not only woken up but dragged out into the hallway-all while Sam slept on.
He'd followed Dean and John without a thought and what he saw sickened him. He had always had a soft spot for children and now he knew just why it was that Dean made him "feel" so much. Gabriel stood there, stock still and watched as the father of two of the bravest humans he'd ever met abused his eldest son. He watched as John threw Dean to the ground and kicked him in the stomach and said "Get to it boy." He watched as Dean fumbled John's pants open and as he cried when he gave his beloved father a blowjob. He watched further as Dean was kicked away once more when John orgasmed and then stumbled into his own room. And he watched and felt sadness for Dean as the young boy just sat there on his haunches and rocked himself through some tears. And lastly he watched as Dean crawled back to Sam and wrapped himself around his younger brother sobbing quitely.
-----End Dreamscape-----
In all his research and observations of Dean"The Righteous Man" Winchester he would have never guessed that Daddy's love had translated so literally to the boy. And as he came back into the real world with a blink of an eye he knew that if Dean in the midst of all this chaos was still dreaming of the pain his father brought to him that Gabriel couldn't just leave it alone. For now though all he could do was take up Castiel's mantle and protect Dean while he slept on.
End Part One.
Beginning of Part Two.
Morning After.
Dean jerked awake, not able to catch his breath-it felt like a pressure on his chest uneasing. But as he lay there he knew enough about his body to know he'd had "that" nightmare again. It was always the same after that, not being able to breath and his heart racing. He didn't know why his other nightmares didn't cause the same but he was grateful for it. After he had the nightmare it always took his mind and body a bit of time to calm down.
Breathing in some more Dean took a glance around, without even a look he knew Sam had returned sometime in the night. What he didn't know was what else had him feeling so different. The reaction to the nightmare was as troubling as it usually was. And he couldn't honestly remember what had prompted it. The nights he had those type of nightmares were usually the worst. But today felt different, sure he'd had the usual gasping awake moment but for some reason it...
Oh screw it he thinks as he turns over to look at Sam some more whatever it was, was a blessing. He felt better than he had in years. It reminded him of Cas somewhat but he knew Cas was gone and Gabriel was back. In all fairness though it was about time one of them got a break and maybe it was good that Dean felt the hazyness instead of terror that normally remained with him for days. Maybe just by having Gabe here his mind relaxed, well one could hope anyway. With that he tried to look around some more, he knew Gabriel had left some time ago but just having the angel around was better than he had expected.
Both him and Sam had been shocked by the angel's initial appearance and had been a little more than rude, but it was all justifiable after everything though. But things in the last week or so had gotten better. Dean knew the angel's feather's were ruffled after he'd learned about the apocalypse and Castiel's turning but then whose "feathers" weren't ruffled over the whole damn situation. Dean knew he would go back and change things if he could, but he also knew that was the humanity in him, the constant regret and guilt that he and Sam would carry to their death. If only and what if's could only get a man so far.
And the last month had been an interesting turn of events. Gabriel knew alot about the "beginning", more so than any of their books and had been helpful more than once already. But the angel had flat out refused to help with some of their cases, citing his old past as a pagan god as being a conflict of interest. The Levitathans were one enemy that Gabe would fight against so most cases saw him off doing more research into them than ghosts or 'geists. But Dean knew the angel needed the cheering so when they got to the hotel room he cheerfully retold their adventures at Pluckie's. Not that Sam was thrilled because all the kid did was complain some more about his "tragic" childhood.
Dean wanted to scream at Sam sometimes and was really grateful when both the angel and Sam left him to his drinking and relaxing last night. It was all he could do to get through the day when Sam said that kind of shit. Sam knew nothing, nothing about what Dean had to do to survive his own "tragic" childhood. He wanted to tell his brother the truth some days but knew enough about Sam that telling would bring even more guilt on the kid, and he had enough for both of them some days. And Dean knew deep down his remincising was what brought about the nightmares, his own mind would betray him alot of times. Too many times to count did he wake up with the after-effects of remembering dear old daddy too discount his somber thoughts being to blame.
Turning over in bed again brought Dean face to face the missing angel. He sighs and with one look goes to sit up when a hand stops him. He knows without looking that Gabe "knew." And that the angel was the reason for his smaller symptoms this nightmare around. He doesn't want to admit that he jumps a little when the hand on his chest pats him once and the angel beside him says in a whisper "I'm sorry." Dean wants to deny it all, wants to scream denial but when he looks into Gabe's eyes and can't hold his glance he knows he's done denying his past, at least with one "person." He laughs a little when he says in a whisper right back, "Cas said that too." And there were no more words needed than those, both angels in his life knew his darkest secret and didn't hate him for it. It was the small things he could be grateful for, those small things he needed in life.
End Part Two.***
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