Title: Four Letter Word
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Ross Jenkins
Fandom: Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
Table: 4, 50ficlets
Prompt: 10, Bond
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Ross Jenkins, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.***
Ross stretched and yawned, looking over at the man sleeping beside him before rolling over and draping an arm over the Doctor's waist. The Time Lord didn't awaken, but Ross could swear that he saw a smile start to form on those delectable lips.
Sometimes it didn't seem possible that he could feel such a connection to anyone, let alone a man who he hadn't even known a few short months ago. But he'd not only fallen head over heels in love with the Doctor, he'd discovered a connection that went deeper than love.
He couldn't help but wonder if the Doctor felt that way, too, but he didn't want to put the question bluntly to his lover. It wasn't something that he felt comfortable asking -- possibly because he was still unsure of just what the answer might be.
That was ridiculous, Ross told himself firmly. The Doctor had to feel the same bond between them that Ross did -- after all, wasn't he the one who had come searching for Ross because he hadn't wanted the two of them to be parted by an untimely death?
The Doctor would never have gone back in time to find him and prevent his death if there hadn't been a bond between them; Ross was sure of that. He'd felt it from the first time he'd looked into the Doctor's eyes, those fathomless dark eyes that never failed to mesmerize him.
He loved the Doctor, yes. But his feelings for the Time Lord went deeper than love; there was so much more to his feelings than what could be encompassed in one simple four-letter word that people threw around with far too much abandon.
Their bond went beyond just caring about each other. Ross was sure that it would strengthen and develop s time went on; the two of them would become closer with each day that passed, and he was confident that they would always be together.
Well, for as long as his human life span would allow them to be, anyway, he thought, moving closer to the Time Lord under the covers. He was seized with the sudden need to slide his arms around the Doctor, pull him close, and kiss those softly parted lips.
What was it about this man that aroused such passion in him? No one else had ever affected him like that, even when he thought he'd been in love. But he'd never felt this way about anyone before, never felt this primitive urge to make his lover a part of himself.
Was that part of what their bond was about? he wondered, pulling the covers up around the Doctor's bare shoulders and carefully slipping his arms around the Time Lord's waist, not wanting to wake him. Was it that overwhelming desire that had drawn them together, more than an emotional bond?
No, that wasn't true, he told himself fiercely, closing his eyes and resting his cheek against the soft silk of the Doctor's hair. Yes, he desired the Time Lord, but the emotional bond that they had with each other was far more important than the sexual attraction.
Lust was also a four letter word, he reminded himself, raising a hand to stroke the Doctor's hair. And for a human, it could be just as strong a motivation at times as love was. But it wasn't only lust he felt for the Doctor. There was so much more to his feelings than that base desire.
There were so many words that he could use to describe his feelings for the Doctor, but none of them would quite be on the mark. There didn't seem to be any one would that could possibly adequately encompass everything that he felt for this man.
Ever since they'd first met, there had been something about the Doctor that had attracted him in a way that no one else ever had, some elusive quality that he hadn't had a word for; so many words danced around in his mind, but none of them came forward and presented themselves.
What did it matter? he asked himself, smiling at the thought. He and the Doctor shared a bond that could only grow stronger over time; it didn't matter if they didn't have a word for the feelings that drew them to each other and held them together.
Their bond didn't need to be described in words; it was enough for Ross that it existed, that he could feel it in his heart. It was a spark deep within him, something that he could focus on and cling to, something that he knew would see him through his darkest hour.
That simple four letter word that so many people used without really understanding how deep its meaning could go seemed to be lodged in his brain, blinking at him in big neon letters. Love. Yes, love was the better part of what he felt, and that description seemed good enough at the moment.
He didn't need to ask the Doctor how he felt, Ross thought, closing his eyes as he snuggled under the covers with the Doctor in his arms. He already knew the answer to that question -- and he knew that the Doctor's answer was reciprocated in every way by his own heart.***
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