Title: Alone
By: scifichicx
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: PG-13
Note: This is a very experimental way of writing Ianto, with his viewpoint turned into a sort of poetry. I don't think he would actually write anything this way, even if the thoughts were in his head.
Summary: Ianto thinks of Jack while he's gone with a mixture of praise and curses.

***

And then I'm left alone.

You're the sun. You burn impossibly bright. You light the way, warm the heart and consume all that gets too close. You dazzle and burn. Ice grows over in your wake. You blind, leaving your imprint on the back of the eyes. All that's left is the negative of your smile. Branded to remember- or to keep from forgetting. So in the chill of night all I can do is remember the warmth lost. The sun always sets.

Why is it that moths kill themselves for a flame?

You're water. You are somehow everywhere at once. Slipping over and seeping in and thusly knowing everything. You soothe and wake with cool, knowing rivulets. You know how to be exactly what will quench. You cover, until the lungs are gasping for breath. Only sometimes do you let the lips break your surface to chance an escape. You rush and flow with torrents and storms. You flow in so gentle it tickles the nerves. The tide always ebbs.

What draws a sailor back to his merciless sea?

You're a shadow. Hidden behind beautiful eyes that have see too many pains. You fade when you wish, or appear stark and black. You slither and flux. You comfort from the heat. Soothing shelter until the worst of high noon can pass. You appear to be what your not and still give yourself away. The shadow always recedes.

When does the fear of the dark truly fade?

When did I say you could break me this way? Take me in and heal me just to set me aside. When did I give myself permission to drown in you? Pushing on until I throw myself into black.

No, I don't blame you. I always knew. You have a heart for yourself and the world. A heart for wonderful things. I always knew. Still, when we were tangled, breath breaking into chilled air and bodies lost in connection, I wondered. When I heard my own name, scrapped from the honey of your voice and felt you surrender just a little... so help me god, Jack, I even hoped.

But never expected.

And now I'm left alone.

***