Title: Here For You
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Ianto Jones/Tenth Doctor
Fandom: Torchwood/Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
Table: 1, 10_prompts
Prompt: 4, I'm here
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own Ianto Jones or the Tenth Doctor. Please do not sue.***
Ianto's eyes flew open when he heard the Doctor cry out; for a moment, he didn't remember where he was, what he could have been doing. The only thing that filled his mind was the fear and horror in the cry that assailed his hearing.
The clouds cleared away from his perception after a moment, and he sat up, reaching for the Time Lord and wrapping his arms protectively around the other man. He tried to calm his own racing heart, knowing that he wouldn't be much good at comforting his lover if he himself was shaken up.
They were in bed, safe on the Tardis. They hadn't been in some situation that was fraught with danger; no, they had been asleep, lying in their own bed on the ship. The Doctor must have had some terrible dream that had jolted him awake.
That had been happening more and more often lately, Ianto thought with a frown. He had no idea what could possibly be reaching into the Time Lord's slumbering mind and twining through his dreams, but he was determined to find out in any way he could.
"It's all right, love," he whispered, pulling the Doctor close against him and letting the other man lean into his embrace. "I'm here. You're safe." Those were the only words that came to his mind at the moment -- at least, the only words of comfort.
The Doctor was trembling in his arms, but at least he hadn't cried out again. Whatever the nightmare had been, it's influence was obviously gone; the Time Lord was taking deep breaths, trying to calm himself, holding a hand against his chest as though to monitor the beat of his hearts.
Ianto had no idea what he could say to calm his lover, so he simply held the Doctor, rocking slightly, hoping that the movement and being held would calm the Time Lord until he could speak coherently and put the nightmare into words.
After what seemed like a long time, but was in reality only a few moments, Ianto could feel the Doctor's hearts settle into their normal rhythm. He breathed a sigh of relief, leaning back against the pillows with the other man still clasped in his embrace.
"What's wrong, sweetheart?" he asked, keeping his tone soft and soothing. "I know it was a nightmare, but it must have been a really bad one this time. Care to talk about it, or is it still too close for you to be able to look at it clearly yet?"
The Doctor shook his head slowly, taking a deep breath before he spoke. "The truth is, Ianto, I don't know if I can actually remember it. It's still close, yes -- but the details are hazy in my mind. I don't know what caused me to be so terrified."
Those words brought a frown to Ianto's face; he'd expected the Doctor to have a clear mental image of what had snatched him from the arms of sleep into the waking world. The Time Lord had never had any problems talking about his nightmares before.
Well, not until recently. The frown deepened as Ianto thought back over the past few weeks. It seemed as though the Doctor's nightmares had been growing more and more pronounced -- and yet he was always unable to bring them to the surface once he'd awakened.
"That hasn't been happening until recently," he said aloud, hoping that the Time Lord was following his line of reasoning. "Do you think there's some reason that you're not remembering your dreams, when they're usually crystal-clear?"
"It's something to do with the Master," the Doctor murmured, taking a deep breath before he continued speaking. "I can feel his taint in my subconscious, Ianto. Somehow, he's found a way to breach the walls between my conscious mind and my dreams."
"How can he do that?" Ianto asked, unsettled by the Doctor's words. No, that wasn't the word at all -- he was shocked to his core by the knowledge that the Master could have such power, that he could wield that sort of control over the Doctor.
"He doesn't control me, Ianto." The young man let the fact that the Doctor must have read that thought slide by; they had more important things to worry about at the moment. "He can find a way into my mind through my dreams, but he can't insinuate himself there permanently."
A shiver went through Ianto at the thought that the Master might actually have some sort of control over the Doctor through his dreams. If the Master could do that, then that meant he was becoming more powerful -- and that was a terrifying thought.
"We're both Time Lords," the Doctor continued, sounding resigned. "That gives us a link that I can't escape from. He might not always be able to find me, or I him. But that link is always there -- and it's a connection that neither of us can deny."
"So in a way, he's always resonating in your mind, even when he doesn't know how to find you and even if you don't want him there," Ianto whispered, shaken by the Doctor's words. He hadn't realized that his lover had to carry his nemesis with him in that way.
"Yes," the Doctor answered, sounding weary. "He's always in the back of my mind -- not his presence, but the thought of him. The biggest failure of my life -- and the one of the biggest regrets. One failure that will always haunt me."
"Because you couldn't keep him from becoming what he is." Ianto didn't have to make those words into a question; he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt just what the Doctor meant. He, too, was attuned to his soul mate's hearts; he didn't need to have those feelings spelled out for him.
"If only I could have .... then he would be much less of a threat to the universe, and to himself," the Time Lord whispered, closing his eyes and swallowing hard. "That will always weigh on my mind, Ianto. The fact that I couldn't save someone I once thought of as a friend."
"You shouldn't think about that, Doctor." Ianto's voice was still soft and gentle, but it now held a hint of firmness that it hadn't had before. "It's in the past, and it's something you can't change. You need to focus on the present, not your history."
The Doctor nodded, sighing as he closed his eyes and leaned into Ianto's embrace. "I know you're right. But he's always been so wrapped up with everything about my life that sometimes it's hard to separate the past from the life I'm living now."
"He's not a part of your life now," Ianto whispered, feeling a shiver of fear move down his spine. "I'm here with you now, Doctor. He's not here, and if I've got anything to do with it, he never will be. I don't want him in your life, in any way other than as your enemy."
"I know, sweetheart," the Doctor answered, pulling back slightly to look at Ianto. "I don't want him in my life, either. But I can't deny that he's been a part of my life in the past, and that he's played a large part in making me the man I am. I don't like it, but it's an inescapable fact."
Ianto nodded reluctantly, sighing as he did. "I know. I just wish that things were different, and that he didn't play such a big role in your personal history." He kissed the top of the Doctor's head, closing his eyes. "Or that he knows you so well."
"Not as well as he might think," the Doctor said, heaving a sigh. "I might not be able to keep him out of my dreaming mind, but I won't give in to him, Ianto. Whatever he's planning, I'll figure it out. And the two of us will stop him, no matter what we have to do."
Ianto tried to hold back another shiver at the Time Lord's words. No matter what we have to do. He didn't like the sound of that -- but if there was a confrontation with the Master, he was going to keep his lover safe, even if he had to sacrifice himself in order to do it.
The Doctor apparently felt the shiver running through his body, as well as the uneasiness of his thoughts. The Time Lord sat up, tightening his arms around Ianto and brushing his lips gently across the young man's mouth.
"I'm here for you, love," he said, echoing the words that Ianto had said only a short while ago. "I'll always be here. I'm not going to leave you -- and I'm not going to let you do something foolish that would take you away from me. I need you too much."
Ianto closed his eyes to hold back the tears that were rising to the surface; he didn't want to cry. He needed to be strong for his lover, now more than ever. If the two of them had to deal with the Master, he couldn't afford to let any kind of weakness come through.
The two of them would be there for each other, no matter what trouble might happen to come their way. He believed that. He had to believe it. He had to hold on to that belief, that feeling that the Doctor would always be here for him, and vice versa.
If he lost that feeling, then he would have lost the Doctor as well. And that would be the end of him. Ianto buried his face against the Time Lord's hair, pulling the other man closer against the warmth of his body. The Doctor was here, safe in his arms -- and for him, nothing else really mattered.***
- Main Torchwood slash page
- New stories page
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- Amazon.com - Torchwood: Children of Earth
- Amazon.co.uk - Torchwood - Children of Earth [DVD] [2009]
- Amazon.ca link - Torchwood - The Complete First Season (7DVD)