Title: Invisible
By: Librarian In Leather
Pairing: Ten/Jack
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: A little bit of personal canon exploring the Doctor's reaction to Jack.
Summary: Jack contemplates being invisible, a discussion about change, Galliphrey and Jacks condition and, of course, a little bit of closure.

***

Jack was lying underneath the Tardis console, trying to repair the damage the Master had done in creating the paradox machine.

'You too, huh?'

His mind kept replaying that scene in his mind, of all the things that had happened in the past year, that bit still confused him. Jack had never felt invisible before, intergalactic playboy; that was him. Until he'd said those words to Martha he hadn't really realised how much of a lost cause his relationship with the Doctor was or how far he'd fallen.

Before he met the Doctor, and since, if he knew someone wasn't interested he steered clear, he wasn't the sort to mope and pine after someone he couldn't have. But the Doctor was different. That thought made Jack snort in self-depreciating amusement. The Doctor was always different.

The Doctor was the one who'd rescued Jack, saved him from destroying the Earth, and made him a hero rather than a coward. But the Doctor was also the one who had abandoned him with no idea why it was that he couldn't die and didn't age. It was the Doctor who was prejudiced against him.

And the Doctor was changed, no longer the gruff northerner that Jack had known. Of course, he wasn't necessarily complaining. Jack, sliding out from under the console to retrieve a spanner, gave this new Doctor an appraising look. Definitely not complaining.

The Doctor looked up from his work, apparently aware that he was being studied. He grinned his manic grin; one that had been rare since the Masters death.

'Do I want to know what you're thinking?' he asked cheekily.

Jack grinned back but his face was still thoughtful. 'Just thinking how much you've changed. I still don't really know you like this. Of course,' his grin became cheerfully lecherous, 'I never got to know the other body as well as I would have liked.'

The Doctor rolled his eyes but he put down the circuitry he was working on and came to sit next to where Jack was lying, propped up on one elbow.

'I'm still me, Jack, I'm still the Doctor, I haven't changed that much.'

Jack stared at him, 'but I have, haven't I Doc? I may not have changed my appearance but inside I've changed more than you have.' He looked down at the grating and wouldn't meet the Doctors' eye. 'And it's driving you away. Everything I am is wrong. I've changed, I'm not particularly human anymore, I've seen the people I love age and die, I'll live as long as you or longer and everything I am drives away the only constant that I've had for the past 140 years.' Jack lay back down and slid underneath the console again leaving the Doctor staring in shock at Jacks legs.

It seemed like an age before Jack heard the Doctor moving around, he assumed the other man was leaving and cursed himself for pushing him away again. He was very surprised, therefore, when he turned his head and found the Time Lord lying next to him, staring at the underside of the console.

'You exist outside time, Jack, there's nothing I can do about that, not anymore, and that's the problem really, if...' he paused and seemed to lose it for a second but he pulled himself together when he felt Jacks hand on his. 'If the Time Lords were still alive we could fix this, we controlled the untempered schism! Little bit of time vortex, no problem, but their not here anymore Jack, their gone and now it's just me and I can't do it on my own.' He paused again and took a deep breath. When he started talking again his voice was quiet. 'Ever since the war, it's been so silent, in my head, I can't hear them anymore and...and I can't feel it, it's not just the Time Lords who were destroyed, Gallifrey burnt, it burnt and now it's gone,' his voice now came out almost as a whisper. 'Gallifrey; which existed outside time.'
Jack felt almost as if electricity jolted through his body at the last sentence. 'Gallifrey existed outside time?' he asked nervously, waiting for the Doctor to nod before he continued, 'A fixed point, never changing...like me?

The Doctor sighed, 'exactly, it's gone Jack and I can still feel the emptiness, but inside the emptiness is you, I can feel you inside my head and sometimes it's almost like Gallifrey's back and then I remember and it's like losing it all over again.' At last the Doctor turned to face him. 'Sometimes Jack, your presence is the only thing which drags me out of the darkness and sometimes it just brings the darkness closer because it reminds me of them so much, especially so soon after...' his breath caught in his throat.

'I'm sorry,' said Jack, reaching out to place his hand on the side of the Doctors face. 'I didn't realise.'

The Time Lord closed his eyes with a sigh, leaning into Jacks hand. 'It's not your fault Jack and I shouldn't have abandoned you, I just panicked and I should have come back, I should have-' Jack cut off the increasingly frantic tirade by leaning forward and pressing a kiss to the Doctors lips. For a second the Doctor froze in surprise, with his eyes still closed he hadn't seen the kiss coming and before he could kiss back Jack had pulled away.

'I forgive you,' the Doctor stared into warm blue eyes and felt a rush of gratitude towards the captain.

'Thank you,' he said and before he could think what he was doing he leaned in and kissed Jack.

It was Jacks turn to be surprised but once he'd realised he wasn't imagining things, the Doctor really was kissing him, he kissed back warmly, moving his hand to tangle in the Doctors hair.

'Doctor, have you seen- oh, ah, um-' the Doctor and Jack broke apart to see Martha frozen in the door to the console room, blushing. 'Sorry' she squeaked and turned and fled.

The two men lying on the floor, hands entwined in each others hair, met each others eyes and burst out laughing.

***