Title: Never Gone
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Ianto Jones/Tenth Doctor
Fandom: Torchwood/Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
Table: 17, 5_prompts
Prompt: 5, Excerpt from a poem by Pablo Neruda
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own Ianto Jones or the Tenth Doctor. Please do not sue.

***

"You wouldn't consider ever leaving me, would you, Ianto?" the Doctor asked softly, looking out over the bridge that he and Ianto were standing on. The sun shone down on them, shining on the water stretching out in front of them and making him squint.

Ianto turned to his lover, a slight frown marring his brow. "Of course not," he said softly, reaching for the Time Lord's hand. "Whatever put that idea into your head? I could no more leave you than I could rip out my heart and still survive."

"If you left me, it would rip out both of my hearts," the Doctor murmured, still not looking at the other man. "I've been thinking a lot about that lately -- what I would do if you left. I know that you won't, but I can't help wondering what my life would be like."

Ianto was silent for a few moments, gazing out over the water with a contemplative look on his features. When he spoke again, his voice was soft, barely audible to even the man standing beside him. "My life wouldn't be worth living without you in it."

"I wouldn't know what to do if you left," the Doctor said, turning his head to look at his lover. "I could say that I would carry on as usual, even though I'd be hurting -- but there would be so much to it than that. I couldn't carry on after losing my soul mate."

"Our parting is inevitable, at some point," Ianto said gently, moving closer to the Doctor and wrapping one arm around the Time Lord's slender waist. "I'm human, after all. I don't have your life span, Doctor. I'll age and die. You know that."

The Doctor nodded, another sigh escaping his lips. "Of course I do. And I'll be prepared for that when the time comes -- I hope. It's an inevitability that we can't escape. But it would be very different, knowing that you were out there in the world somewhere -- and not with me."

"We've been there before, in a way," Ianto pointed out. "When you were going out on your trips into time and space, and I stayed behind on Earth to keep working with Torchwood because you thought it was the safest place for me to be. But even then, you were never gone from my heart."

The Doctor nodded, a small smile quirking his lips. "And I was wrong about that, wasn't I? You were in far more danger going on missions with Torchwood than you would have been with me. Or if not more, at least just a much danger. I should have realised that."

"You did realise it, and that's all that matters," Ianto assured him, pulling the other man closer against him. "I'm here with you now, Doctor, and that's where I'm going to stay. You don't have to worry about me leaving. Ever. I can promise you that, with all my heart and soul."

"Don't leave me, Ianto. Not even for a day," the Doctor whispered, turning his head to gaze into his young lover's face. "If you do, then I'll end up wandering the world looking for you until you're with me again. There's nothing else I could do."

"I don't ever want to leave," Ianto murmured, feeling a lump starting to form in his throat. He'd known that the Doctor loved him with all of his hearts, that they were soul mates -- but the look in the Time Lord's eyes, the love written in his expression, was nearly reducing him to tears.

"Sometimes I feel that there are all these little drops of anguish gathered somewhere in me -- not just at the thought of you leaving, but for all the other times people have left me," the Doctor said, his tone hollow. "That they're just waiting to break free inside me."

Ianto couldn't think of anything to say to that; all he could do was turn and gather the Doctor into his arms, giving the other man silent reassurance of his nearness, letting him know that he wasn't alone and that he had someone to lean on.

"I think about living without you, knowing that you've chosen to make a life somewhere else -- maybe with someone else," the Doctor choked out, shaking his head, "and I feel like there's something inside me that's choking the life out of me."

Ianto shook his head firmly, one hand moving up and down the Doctor's back, trying to soothe the Time Lord. He knew that the other man was becoming agitated, and his mind flailed for a way to take his lover's mind off this subject.

"My hearts would be lost without you," the Doctor whispered, the words so soft that Ianto could hardly hear him. But those words went straight to his own heart; and his own words were spoken so sincerely that no one who might have heard them could have denied their heartfelt meaning.

"My heart would stop beating if I walked away from you," he said quietly, his words meant only for the man in his arms. "I was only existing before I met you, Doctor. I didn't start living until the first time you looked into my eyes and smiled at me."

"What about Jack? And Lisa?" the Doctor asked, pulling away slightly and meeting Ianto's blue-grey gaze with his own. "I know you loved them. I wouldn't want you to deny those feelings just to appease me, Ianto. You shouldn't have to."

"Yes, I loved them." Ianto's voice was firm, but still soft and loving. "And there'll always be a part of me that still does. You never forget anyone that you've ever truly loved. But they weren't my soul mates, Doctor. They could never have been what you are to me."

"No one has ever been what you are to me, not in all my lives," the Doctor told him, raising a hand to cup Ianto's cheek. A soft smile curved his lips, bringing an answering smile to Ianto's face. "And no one ever will be again. There's only one soul mate, you know."

Ianto nodded, placing his hand over the Doctor's on his cheek. How had he been so lucky as to find this man? Most people searched for their entire lives for their perfect soul mate, and never found them. He hadn't had to search that long, and his angel had fallen right into his arms.

"Don't leave me," the Doctor whispered again. "Not even for an hour. Not even for a minute. Having you by my side has given me a new lease on life, Ianto. You've given me something that I've never had before, a bond that I thought I would never find."

"I'll never leave you," Ianto whispered, pulling the Doctor close against him and lowering his head to brush his lips across the Time Lord's soft mouth. The contact was electric; he could feel sparks of desire shoot through his body at the mere touch of their lips.

He could almost feel an answering rush of desire in the Doctor; their arms tightened around each other as their kiss intensified. He didn't care who was watching; let the whole world see how they felt about each other. It made no difference to him.

He would never leave this man, not in all of his lifetime. And when he was gone, his spirit would still linger on, to guide the man he loved, to keep him safe and to let him know that he would always be loved, even if they weren't together on a physical plane any longer.

The Doctor rested his forehead against Ianto's shoulder when they broke the kiss, leaning against him as though his legs were wobbly. After a few moments, he raised his head, looking at his young lover with a soft smile. "I think it's time we were heading back to the Tardis, don't you?"

Ianto nodded, returning the smile, his heart leaping in his chest. He couldn't mistake that look in the Time Lord's eyes; there would be no more talk of leaving, only the expressions of love between their bodies and souls that needed no words to be understood.

***