Title: Tail Play 2
By: Jessie Blackwood
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: R
Warning: ongoing series
Series: 1) Tail Play
Standard disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood or anything to do with it, it remains in the copyrighted hands of Mr Davies and the BBC. I'm not earning anything from it, I'm simply having fun with it and thank you for the opportunity. Any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.
Summary: An alien artefact tumbles through the Rift and causes a little problem with Jack's DNA. A cracky little fic, the result of a humorous discussion one night concerning the introduction of Alien DNA into 51st Century humans.

***

The ABBA song came to mind here....

I am behind you, I always find you, I am the tiger...

Something was tickling his nose. Ianto sneezed, mightily. He liked sneezing as a rule, when it could be done right; a loud release of air and not requiring a handkerchief. He hated the other kind, the kind that did require a handkerchief and left a distinct feeling as if he'd sneezed his brains into the hanky as well... He sighed, yawned, opened an eye, decided it was too early to wake up and closed it again. Moments later, he sneezed again. This time, he opened his eyes fully to see the culprit, an orange and black-striped tail whisking off out of view again.

"Jack!" Ianto exclaimed, exasperated. Jack smirked and leaned over, planting a kiss on his lips. "Mmph..." That effectively cut off the complaint that had been forming, although he was thinking of cutting off the tail if Jack didn't stop teasing him with it. When he was allowed up for air, he glared at the Captain and asked very tartly if he wouldn't like to start using a litter tray. "After all, I'm convinced you're starting to act like a cat as well as own an appendage like one. You've always been a bit aloof. Now you're downright annoying."

"Sorry, Ianto." Jack at least sounded contrite. And that kiss had been...well, nice as a matter of fact; definitely not aloof. Ianto raised an eyebrow. Jack smiled back, hopefully. Ianto's glare softened. Jack looked down at the bedclothes, then up again. Ianto allowed a small smile to tug his mouth up at one side. Jack grinned; he had been forgiven.

"Oh alright," Ianto capitulated. "I think we've got time before we have to go to work..."

TW

"Okay, Jack, it's okay, we'll have you fixed up soon." Ianto was helping the captain down to the medical bay; the man's features were contorted in pain and he was finding it hard to walk.

"What the fuck happened to you, Jack? Got stuck in your zip again?" Owen snarked, helping Jack to the table.

"No, you...ow... Christ, this hurts..."

"He trapped his tail in the car door." Ianto explained. "He's not got the hang of it quite yet. He shut the bloody door too fast."

Owen grimaced in sympathy. "Ouch, not a great way to start the day. Come on then, let me look. If it's like the rest of you though, it should heal quickly."

"If it's broken, though..."

"If it's broken, I'll set it, don't worry. Let me see. Oh yes, nasty..." Owen examined the obvious dislocation of the last four inches of the tail, the skin had torn as well. "I think I'd better give you a local anaesthetic and we'll go from there." Owen was filling a syringe. "Damn me, does this mean I'm turning into a vet now?" Owen grinned and administered the injection. Jack's relief was almost instantaneous. He leaned heavily against Ianto, looking grey. "There, we'll give this stuff time to kick in completely, then we'll sort you out."

TW

A short while later, the tail was straight again, the damage bandaged to protect it until it healed fully. Jack was resting on his bunk, lying on his side. Ianto was stroking his tail, scratching gently around the base, much to Jack's pleasure. He was purring again.

"How are you feeling now?"

"Been better..."

"You'll be fine. Next time, look before you slam the car door."

Jack chuckled. "Got me some Ianto-time though. Can't complain too much."

"I wouldn't advocate doing that again though. Must have hurt."

Jack shivered. "It did. Boy, did it hurt, like being kicked in the nuts..."

"Nasty. Well, you'll be fine soon. Take more care though, Jack. You wouldn't want to lose any of it. Owen might have had to amputate. Better not risk that again. It isn't like breaking a leg." Jack nodded, looking sick. Ianto soothed him, stroking the length of soft fur. "Shh, you'll be fine," he reassured, fingers tracing along Jack's side. The man sighed and closed his eyes. In moments he was asleep.

TW

The tail snaked across Ianto's body and Ianto grabbed it, stroking gently. Jack purred, a soft noise in his throat. Ianto blew on the tip, then kissed it. Jack shivered. Ianto let it go and the tail curled around his wrist, tip twitching. It's owner growled and rolled over, pinning Ianto underneath him. Ianto smiled and spread his legs. Jack lay down between them, his body warm as sunlight, the tail snaking around to stroke along a thigh. Ianto sighed and the tail snaked further,

More like a dominant male tiger than a cat, he thought. Then he felt where the tail had reached and moaned softly, his hips moving in response to the caresses. Jack growled again, a rough husky sound, and all other thoughts fled.

And if I meet you, what if I eat you, I am the tiger....

***

Next story in series - Tail Play - The Affair.