Title: Sands of Time
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Ianto Jones/Tenth Doctor
Fandom: Torchwood/Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
Table: 1, 50scenes
Prompt: 4, Sand
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own Ianto Jones or the Tenth Doctor. Please do not sue.***
Ianto shaded his eyes, squinting into the sunlight and looking down the expanse of beach. The Doctor hadn't been anywhere in the Tardis when he awoke -- though he'd been nervous about going to look for the Time Lord. He didn't know his way around the ship, and he was fairly sure that he'd manage to get himself lost without the Doctor to guide him.
But still .... it didn't seem like the Doctor to go for a walk on the beach. There were many sides to the enigmatic man he'd fallen in love with, Ianto thought, allowing himself a wry smile. He didn't know what the Time Lord's habits were, after all. Maybe he came to places like this all the time -- though Ianto couldn't exactly picture him being enthused about the beach. Just one more thing he'd have to learn about the Gallifreyan.
He stepped out of the front door, looking back with a worried frown. What if he managed to accidentally lock them out of the ship, and the Doctor didn't have his sonic screwdriver with him? He'd probably be more than a bit upset about being stranded here if they couldn't get back into the Tardis because of something Ianto had done ....
The young man shook his head, laughing at himself. Of course the Doctor would be able to get them back into the Tardis, even if they got locked out somehow. He'd told Ianto several times that he was bonded to the ship; the Tardis was a part of him, in many ways. Ways that Ianto didn't quite understand, but that he was hopefully going to learn about.
After all, he told himself, he had time to learn. He'd come with the Doctor when the Time Lord had left his time, telling Jack and the others at Torchwood regretfully but firmly that his place was with the man he loved. Jack, surprisingly enough, had agreed. He'd had a long talk with Ianto about grabbing opportunities when they were extended, impressing the fact on the young man that this chance might never come again.
Jack had sounded so .... Ianto frowned, searching his mind for the proper word. He'd sounded like he regretted not taking the chance to be with the Doctor permanently when he could. Ianto knew that Jack and the Doctor had been lovers when Jack had traveled with him as his companion. How could they not have been? Ianto didn't hold it against either of them -- after all, he'd been involved with both men, as well.
He was actually glad that Jack had given up his chance with the Doctor, Ianto told himself. It might be a selfish attitude for him to take, but he didn't care. If Jack was still with the Doctor, then he himself wouldn't be -- he'd probably never even have met the other man. He'd probably have never even met Jack; the two of them would still be traveling around the universe, blissfully unaware of the fact that Ianto Jones existed.
But that wasn't how it had worked out. Jack had stayed with Torchwood -- and given him his freedom to be here with the man he loved. Wherever and whenever "here" was, Ianto thought, a smile flitting across his face. The Doctor hadn't told him where they were going, only that he thought they needed to relax for a while, and that they'd be there when Ianto awakened. That was the last thing he'd said before they had both fallen asleep for the night.
When he'd awakened, the Doctor had been gone, and he'd dressed and peeked outside, to see the beach in all its sun-baked glory. The blue of the ocean in front of him seemed to stretch out until it met the horizon; Ianto felt very small and insignificant next to it. The sea always affected him that way, he mused, kicking offhandedly at the sand. It gave him a sense of his own mortality, something that he was never comfortable thinking about.
Even less comfortable now that he had everything to live for. He sighed, looking down at his feet as he set one in front of the other, making his way slowly along the wet sand. He knew that he only had a finite number of years -- not the unlimited time that someone like Jack had. And yet .... the Doctor had chosen to bond with him. Was there something that he didn't know, some reason for the Doctor gravitating to him?
He didn't think the Doctor had any hidden agendas. Ianto didn't want to believe that there was anything cold and calculated about the way the Doctor had fallen in love with him. He himself had lost his heart completely to the enigmatic Time Lord; he would follow the Doctor to the end of time if he was asked to do so. He couldn't do anything less for the man he loved.
Where was he? It wasn't like the Doctor to be away from him this long, especially when Ianto didn't know where they were. He raised his hand to his eyes again, shading them against the glare of the sun on the water, gazing off down the beach. Yes, there he was. Standing at the water's edge, hands in his pockets, gazing out at the sea.
The Doctor was too far away for Ianto to see his expression, but the young man could close his eyes and conjure up a mental picture of his lover. Tall and slim; pale porcelain skin; deep, dark brown eyes; soft, luscious lips that Ianto couldn't resist kissing any time the Doctor was near him. And a body that he couldn't keep his hands off of. It was a potent combination, and Ianto couldn't help wondering why Jack had given him up so willingly.
Maybe it hadn't been willingly, Ianto thought with a jolt. Maybe he'd wanted to stay with the Doctor, and something had prevented him from doing it. After all, how could anyone give up such an angel? Still, Jack seemed contented enough at Torchwood -- even if he did have the tendency to brush away questions that touched too intimately on his past.
Ianto pushed the thoughts of Jack away as he headed down the beach towards the Doctor. He wasn't sure if the Time Lord had seen him, and he didn't know if the other man had left the Tardis without him because he wanted some privacy. But something drew him to the Doctor; he couldn't have kept away even if he'd wanted to. He had to be near the Gallifreyan; had to touch him, hear his voice, be as close to him as possible.
He'd never felt this way about anyone, not even Jack. Ianto only took it as more proof that the two of them were destined, meant to be since the moment of his birth. What other reason could there be for his overwhelming attraction to the Doctor? It went beyond the physical, even beyond love. It was something outside of both of them, something they couldn't control.
The Doctor turned around at almost the moment that Ianto was within close enough range to reach out and touch him, a smile spreading over his face as he held out a hand to his young lover. Ianto took that hand, pulling the thin man into his arms and nuzzling his cheek against the soft silk of the Doctor's tawny hair.
"Why did you come out here alone?" he asked softly, half-dreading what he would hear. Maybe the Doctor was contemplating taking him back to where he belonged; maybe he'd decided that he had made a mistake, and that Ianto wasn't the one who was meant to be with him, after all. Maybe this was going to be over before it had even begun.
"I needed to think," the Doctor replied, making no move to disentangle himself from Ianto's embrace. "So much has happened since I met you .... it was all starting to feel more than a bit confusing. I don't usually come to places like this, but the ocean has a way of calming me and helping me to sort out my thoughts."
"I hope those thoughts weren't troubling you too much," Ianto murmured, an icy fear clutching at his heart. What if the Doctor was thinking of breaking their bond, taking him back to Cardiff and never seeing him again? He didn't want to ask the Time Lord if that was the case; he didn't think he could bear to hear those thoughts translated into words. Words would make it all the more final, more real, more unbearable.
The Doctor shook his head, leaning against Ianto and sliding thin arms around his waist. "No, not troubling, exactly," he said slowly, frowning a little as he struggled to find the right words to express himself. "I was simply thinking of how much my life has changed in the past few weeks, and how much I have to live for now."
"You've always had a great deal to live for," Ianto objected, frowning at the Doctor's sobering words. He didn't like to think that the man he loved might have ever considered ending his life. For Ianto, a universe without the Doctor somewhere in it wasn't worth existing in.
The Doctor shook his head, those dark eyes meeting Ianto's and holding his gaze. "Not always. When I met you, I was feeling very disillusioned, and ready to let it all go. I doubt that I would have regenerated again, Ianto. Not that I couldn't -- I just .... didn't want to. I was tired of living. Tired of being alone."
"You aren't alone now," Ianto whispered, pulling the other man more firmly against him, molding the Doctor's body to his. His hands moved down, over the Time Lord's curvy hips, down his thighs, then back up to cup that firm, rounded ass in both hands. "You'll never have to be alone again, Doctor. You have me now -- and I'm not going anywhere."
"Do you know how many times people have told me that?" The Doctor's expression had changed from contemplative to melancholy, his voice almost breaking on the words. "Everyone. Everyone I've ever loved. Even Jack -- and he's the one person I've wanted to be with who actually did have forever to give. They all left me, eventually. Everyone does, Ianto. You may say that you want to stay with me, but I've given up on believing in forever."
"You shouldn't do that," the young man murmured, his eyes meeting the Doctor's, worry in his voice. "Don't ever give up. If you do that, then you're also giving up on me. On us, on what we have together."
"I suppose that all we can do is take things one day at a time," the Doctor said, pulling away from Ianto's arms and turning to look out at the sea again. Ianto shoved his hands into his pockets, feeling bereft without the Doctor in his arms. He ached to embrace the other man again, wanting nothing more than to feel that slender body pressed against his, to wrap his arms around the man he loved and know that he was here, he was real.
The Doctor bent to trail his long, elegant fingers through the pool of water around his ankles, rolling the legs of his jeans up a bit more. His fingers dug into the dry sand only a few inches from where he knelt, opening his hand slowly and letting the grains of sand sift into the air, falling to the ground to be absorbed into the wet sand under his feet.
"We're rather like that, aren't we?" Ianto said softly, kneeling next to the Time Lord and reaching out a hand to rest it on the other man's thigh. "All grains of sand in an infinite universe. None of us knows how long we have, Doctor. I can't know how many years I'll have to give you. But I'll gladly give you all of that time, and anything else you want, as well."
The Doctor's eyes met his, something in their dark depths that Ianto couldn't quite put a word to. Sadness? Skepticism? He wasn't sure, and he didn't want to ask the Doctor what he was thinking. But he desperately wanted to convince the Time Lord that he was sincere -- that he wasn't going to leave him like all the others. He was the one person who would stay, until the end of time. Now that he'd found the Doctor, there was no way he was going to give this man up. This was his destiny, and nothing was going to tear him away.
"I was thinking more of the idea that every day we have is like a grain of sand -- and that they slip away so quickly," the Doctor whispered, brushing the sand from his palm against his leg and standing up again. He shaded his eyes and looked towards the Tardis, then down the beach. There were no people around yet, but the place wouldn't be deserted forever.
"We should go," he said abruptly, turning back to retrace his steps up the beach towards the blue police box. "It wouldn't do for us to be caught here. Too many questions, ones that I'm not willing to answer. I don't even know if I'd have an answer that wouldn't sound absolutely ridiculous, at any rate."
"Doctor." Ianto put his hand on the Doctor's arm, making the other man turn towards him, brows raised in question. "Don't .... don't take me back to Cardiff, please. If you're displeased with me, with something I've done, then tell me, and I'll try to fix things. But I can't bear the feeling that you may not want me to be with you any more."
The Doctor's mouth dropped open, his eyes widening in surprise. "Not want you with me?" His voice was shocked, incredulous. "How could you think that, Ianto? You've given me a reason to live again -- a reason that I didn't have until the day you walked into my life. I've told myself over and over that I don't have anything to offer you -- so you being with me, of your own free will, is something I'll always be grateful for."
Ianto breathed a sigh of relief, pulling the Doctor into his arms again and nuzzling his cheek against the Time Lord's hair. "I was so afraid that you didn't want me any more," he murmured, relief making him feel weak and dizzy. "I couldn't bear losing you. You're the other half of my soul, Doctor. I don't want to go through the rest of my life without you. I couldn't. Something in me would wither and die."
The Doctor pulled back slightly, just far enough to look into Ianto's eyes, raising a hand to push back a few strands of dark hair that the wind had blown into the young man's eyes. "If you leave, Ianto, it will be because you want to," he whispered, his voice soft but strong. "I'll never give you up, not of my own choice. Never."
Ianto tilted the Time Lord's face up to his with one hand, his other arm slipping around the Doctor's slim waist. His mouth covered the other man's, kissing the Doctor until they were both breathless with desire.
"I think we should get back to the Tardis," the Doctor panted when Ianto finally released him from the insistent kiss. "Making love on the beach may sound romantic, but I don't fancy having sand in my intimate body parts. I've a feeling that would be bloody uncomfortable."
"I'd say that's a marvellous idea," Ianto laughed, twining his fingers through the Doctor's and following him back towards the ship. "No, not the sand!" he added when the Doctor turned and fixed him with a mock glare.
"Ianto Jones, if you dare to put sand in my trousers ...."
"The only thing that's going to be getting into your trousers is my intimate body parts," Ianto said softly, squeezing the Doctor's hand. The Time Lord flashed him a grin over his shoulder, hurrying across the beach to the front door of the Tardis and pulling Ianto inside with him.
Moments later, the blue police box shimmered out of sight, leaving the beach as empty and deserted as they'd found it when they'd arrived.***
- Main Torchwood slash page
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- Amazon.com - Torchwood: Children of Earth
- Amazon.co.uk - Torchwood - Children of Earth [DVD] [2009]
- Amazon.ca link - Torchwood - The Complete First Season (7DVD)