Title: The Conversation
By: Inara
Pairing: 10/Jack
Rating: PG-13
Summary: There were things that Jack had to say to the Dr, but he wasn't sure where to start.

***

He leaned against one of the coral like supports that seemed to grow from the floor of the Tardis, its rough surface snagging at his clothes. Hardly seeming to breathe, he watched as the Doctor's long slender fingers slid gently over the console, coaxing it back into life, as he talked to her softly, under his breath, willing the Tardis to recover. So intent was he on listening, when the Doctor actually spoke to him, he almost jumped out of his skin.

'Aren't you going to say anything?' His voice had a harshness to it that Jack hadn't noticed before. Ever since he's returned to the Tardis he'd wanted to have what he'd begun to refer to as The Conversation, but now, when he was on the edge of actually having it, he wasn't sure whether it was a good idea. Instead, he played for time.

'How did you know I was here? Eyes in the back of your head?'

'Did you know,' The Dr stated evenly, still not turning to face him, 'that the Mogavi of Lerato 6 actually do have eyes in the back of their heads? Problem is they don't have any in the front so they have to walk everywhere backwards, or they bump into things.'

'Why did you leave me behind?' Jack blurted out, hating the raw emotion in his voice. For a moment there was silence, the only sound the gentle humming of the Tardis. 'Dammit Doctor, talk to me, you owe me that much.' The Doctor sighed, but kept his eyes fixed firmly on the console, as if the answers to then universe were written on its worn surface. Then he said softly, in a voice that Jack had to struggle to hear:

'I didn't know. After I regenerated....well, things didn't go the way they should. I couldn't remember who I was, what I was. If Rose hadn't been there...' He swallowed, not allowing himself to walk down that path again. He was on a different course now. He forced cheerfulness into his voice. ''Anyway, you made it. Didn't need any help from me. Head of Torchwood no less. Can't see anything wrong with that Jack.'

With quick strides Jack crossed the console room and grabbed the Doctors arm, spinning him round, until the two men stood face to face. 'You have no idea what happened to me,' Jack said quietly, looking into the other man's eyes and seeing the universe reflected there. 'I was alone on Satellite Five for a millennia. Alone, Doctor; you of all people should know what that feels like. God,' He gave a hoarse laugh, 'Thanks to Rose's gift I couldn't even take my own life, and please don't think I never considered it. Do you know how long eternity feels when you have no-one?'

The Doctor looked at him, seeing the anguish that Jack was trying to disguise, and it tore at him. He did know what it felt like, every day he felt it, tearing at his soul leaving a constant open wound.

'Oh yes,' He whispered. 'I know.' He let out a shaky breath. 'Every day I feel alone Jack, even with Rose, Martha, you...every minute I feel an emptiness that claws at me, and I know that I am the last of my kind. I try to listen for their voices, and all I hear is silence. So yes Jack, I know what it's like.'

He made to turn back to the Tardis, but Jack held on to him, needing the physical contact, worried that if he let go he would drift off into space.

'Tell me that if you had known, you would have come back.' The Doctor gave a small smile.

'I would have come back. Know this Jack, I will always come back for you. You will never be abandoned.' Jack cupped the Doctors face in his hands, and kissed him softly on the lips.

'That's all I need to know.'

***