Title: Time and Tide
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Jack Harkness
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Rating: PG-13
Table: 50ficlets
Prompt: 47, Time & Tide
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Jack Harkness. Please do not sue.

***

The Doctor walked along the sidewalk, hands shoved into his pockets, eyes on the ground in front of him. Fortunately, there weren't many people around, so he didn't have to worry about bumping into anyone as he trudged along.

One foot in front of the other .... one step at a time .... though he knew where those steps would lead him in time. Back to the Hub; the place that was always his ultimate destination when he came back to Cardiff. The only place he felt drawn to here.

Of course he would feel drawn to it. Jack was there; the immortal who still held him in a grip that he felt he'd never be able to break free of.

What was it about this man that so fascinated him? Jack had been like a lodestar to him from the first time they'd met; there had been an instant attraction between them, even though he'd been in another body, and his personality certainly hadn't been the same.

Still, he was the same man inside in so many ways -- including the part of him that had fallen in love with Jack. They'd actually consummated that relationship since he'd been in this new body, and Jack had seemed to be devoted to him.

The end of their relationship had been more or less a mutual decision, he told himself, sighing without realizing he'd made a sound. He hadn't wanted to end it, but he'd understood Jack's reasons for wanting to do so.

That wasn't entirely true. He didn't really understand why Jack had wanted to walk away from him, from something that he'd through was precious to them both.

But the immortal had his reasons for anything he did, even if he didn't reveal them to others. The Doctor was fairly sure that Jack had ended their liaison because he was afraid of falling in love -- and he didn't want to let himself be that open.

Yet, the two of them kept meeting; he kept coming back to Cardiff, on the pretense of refueling from the RIft. He didn't need to do it so often, obviously, and Jack knew that. But they kept up the front for the rest of the Torchwood team.

When the others had all gone home and they were alone in the Hub, they fell into each other's arms, each of them taking what they needed. It was mutually satisfying, at least for a short time; but the Doctor knew that he wouldn't be content with doing this forever.

No, he wanted more from Jack than just being together furtively, as they were now. At least, to him it felt furtive; he hated feeling that they were somehow skulking in corners, hiding their relationship from anyone who might happen to be around.

He couldn't keep doing this. He wouldn't. He told himself that every time he came back here, always intending to end it for good.

But somehow, he could never bring himself to do that. He could run to the ends of the universe, try to pretend that he could be happy without the one man who had captured his hearts and soul, but he would always know that he was lying to himself.

Time and tide would always bring him back here, to Jack. Or to wherever Jack might happen to be, even if it wasn't in Cardiff working with Torchwood. There was a part of him that would always be drawn to the immortal, no matter where in time he might hide himself.

The truth was, he loved Jack. He didn't want the two of them to end; even if this hole-and-corner type of arrangement was all that the other man was willing to give him, he would accept it. He wouldn't be too happy with it, but he'd take what he could get.

Oh, that was so pathetic, a little voice in his head sneered. He was holding on to something that he should have put out of his life a long time ago.

Jack was too big a part of his life to just put him into the past. He would always be drawn to the other man, no matter how much he tried to push their relationship away from him. There was some fatal flaw in him that would always bring him back.

He was fairly sure that Jack felt the same way; the immortal hadn't been able to push the Doctor out of his life, either. From the way that Jack touched him when they were together in the darkness of Jack's bedroom, he knew that was true.

There was a hunger in the way that Jack took him, a neediness that no one else he'd been with had ever displayed. Jack didn't just want him; the immortal loved him, even if the words never came out. Even if Jack would never admit it to himself.

If only they could say those words to each other, their relationship would be so much easier for them both to accept. Neither of them would feel so .... alone.

The Doctor sighed again, turning around and beginning to retrace his steps back to the Hub. It was getting on for night, and he knew that Jack would expect him to come back. And in his hearts, he wanted to be back there with the man he loved.

Yes, time and tide would always lead him back to Jack Harkness, even if that little voice in his head kept telling him that he shouldn't be there. It might be a mistake in the long run -- but it was one that he couldn't keep himself from making.

***