Title: To Have Loved and Lost
Author: Clarity
Rating: G
Pairings/Characters: Jack/Ianto
Warnings: It does ignore the Stopwatch thing - sorry. And it is unbetaed. Plus, I named the old man from the pictures that were taken down the Blind Watchmaker in a small homage to Prof. Richard Dawkins. No idea who he is really!
Summary: Based around the last three pictures in this gallery and a few which aren't there.

***

'I'll miss you.'

Jack unexpectedly found himself with an armful of Owen. Touched, he wrapped his arms around the man and told him the same, a small smile lighting up his face momentarily. 

Then he stepped back, giving each one of them a last glance goodbye. Toshiko's eyes were shining with tears but she wasn't letting them fall; not yet. He knew that would happen the moment he stepped out of their lives. Owen looked hugely wistful and for once, completely serious. Gwen was giving him a slight, pacifying smile as if she was telling herself over and over it was okay that he was about to walk out of their lives with so little explanation.

He gave her one last pat on the shoulder. After all, he was doing this mainly for her. For her and for Rhys, who didn't deserve to end up on a slab. 

The Blind Watchmaker had shown him much; things that would happen if he didn't go through the rift and hence seal it off. He was still dubious that the strange old man had been telling him the truth. It could all be mind games. But he wasn't about to take that risk. To see Gwen screaming in pain, the man she loved dead and cold; no, he couldn't let that happen. Wouldn't.

Just as he began to turn away, towards the exit, he caught sight of Ianto coming in from aside. He stopped, heart thudding low and heavy in his chest, and stared at him. 

Ianto looked on quizzically. He had no idea what was going on; no idea Jack was leaving forever.
 
Leaving without saying goodbye to him.

He could tell the others were waiting for him to go over and give the same speech they had received to Ianto, and were surprised when he merely turned away and left. 

Jack couldn't go to him, and he hated himself a little for that. But he knew it was for the best.

Because he knew too much of the pain it would cause if he stopped. 

The Blind Watchmaker had taunted him with a vision of his own future; of himself in love.

Stars and moons and oceans in love.

He had seen himself in love with sweet, snarky, beautiful Ianto Jones; holding him, kissing him, whispering his soul to him in ways he hadn't experienced since he had been with his dear Estelle. 

Somehow he just knew that when he saw that vision it was all real. The Blind Watchmaker wasn't lying to him. Truth was, he had already been feeling more than drawn to Ianto. He loved playing games with him, flirting with him, laughing at his IMs and had found a kinds of excuses just to be around him of late. Yes, Jack could see that developing into a lot more given time.

But now it would never be. Because he had to save Rhys, and Gwen, and all of the other people who would be hurt by the rift if he did not go through and seal it. He had no choice. Call it punishment, or providence, or fate. It was not to be.

Jack walked slowly down the long dark corridor and out into the night without looking back once.

***