Title: Demons
By: jiskah
Pairing: Reid/Morgan
Rating: PG-13
Dislcaimer: Nothing's mine. All belongs to CBS and Ed Bernero. I really would like to have Reid for me. :)
Author's Notice: I was depressed so this turned out more angsty as intended but I like it.
Summary: Everybody has their own demons of the past to fight with and the demons of the BAU members are more than bad and can destroy a relationship between the two most haunted persons.

***

Spencer was lying in bed watching the familiar ceiling. He couldn't sleep, not because of nightmares. The thing that kept him awake was the person next to him with shadows of the past as bad as Spencer maybe worse than Spencer's. It was a hard fight for both of them as they had noticed their attraction towards each other. Now they were a couple but still it was a daily fight. They agreed not to delve into the others past but it was a hard job. Their cases often came close enough to their demons and if it weren't the cases it was something one of them said without noticing it would dredge up the other one's demons. This shouldn't be a problem but both were stubborn as hell and didn't want to go to a therapist or talk with the other one about it. What happen in the past should stay in the past.

With a heavy sigh of frustration Spencer stood up. As long as his brain was focused on these problems with his lover he wouldn't be getting any sleep. Silently he sneaked out to the living room and turned on the TV. He preferred reading more than watching TV but he knew he wouldn't able to focus on the pages right now. Spencer flipped through the channels in the hope that he would find something interesting. After a short time he heard footsteps behind him and knew what was coming next. A hand was laid softly upon his shoulder.

"Hey little one, what are you doing? You should be a sleep."

"I can't."

Slowly his lover came around the chair and faced him.

"Having nightmares?"

"No, no nightmares. It's just I can't stop thinking, that's all."

"Thinking about what? No secrets, honey."

Spencer thought about his chances to lie to his lover and not get caught. But seconds later he knew there was no chance, he had to be honest.

"I was thinking about us being together."

"And?"

"You know I love you, right?"

"I do, just like you know I love you. What's up?"

Again a heavy sigh.

"I think we need more space between us. We are too close."

"Is this the answer about you moving in?"

"Yes and no. I really do love you but if I move in we don't have any chance of avoiding each other if something happened."

"So this is about the day before yesterday? Because I threw you out?"

"Not really it was just one incident of many that brought me to this. I am going to lose you and I don't know how to stop it."

"You are not going to lose me. What are you talking about? I am here with you."

Spencer became frustrated. He never was good with words when it came to relationships.

"I know you are here, it was a metaphor. The more we hang out together, doings things together the more I am going to destroy you. We both have enough to face with our demons."

His lovers face became icy.

"That's it? The same old story about my past or yours? What do you want? Shall I tell you all the nasty details of what happened to me?"

"You don't understand. For god's sake I want to leave it in the past. But there are times when I say something that brings up your past and you freak out just like I do whenever you get close to my past. That's what I mean. I don't want to walk on eggshells anymore and I don't think you want to either."

Spencer waited for any reaction. The tension coming from his lover was more than he could bear. The genius reached out for the other one's arm and pulled his lover into his arms.

"Spencer, why are you doing this?"

"Because I love you more than is good for me."

"So why do you always start a fight about this?"

"Because I care about you. We are both stubborn. I think we should try to stop this and finally look for help."

"You mean therapy? You know both of us can trick them without them even noticing."

"I know. I don't mean necessarily therapy."

"I don't get what you are trying to say."

"A support group. We both know that no one understands you better than someone who has gone trough the same things."

"I'll think about it but you know it will be complicated with our job."

"I know, but you can be sure of two things."

"Two?"

"Yeah, first: I love you and won't let you down. Second: If you want me to help you or need to talk to me I am right here for you."

"Same for me, Spencer."

Smiling Spencer lent down and kissed his lover on the forehead.

"That's all I could ever ask for, Derek."

***