Title: Here, There and Everywhere (a babble)
Author: Sam
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pairing: None
Rating: FRC – humor
A/N: This started with an IM with a friend about an ofc I had for Spencer that lasted all of 5 seconds before she went the way of my other ofcs for the boys. I had a bunny ask me what would happen if an actual psychic ever had cause to work with the BAU?
Disclaimer: Not mine, no money made.

***

"Go here." 

 

Spencer shook his head, ignoring the dirt road looming up in the distance.  "But our profile doesn't indicate anything out that way." 

 

"Go here." 

 

He frowned, glancing at the self-proclaimed psychic from the driver’s seat of the SUV.  Hotch and Gideon rode ahead of him, Morgan and Elle with JJ behind them, Spencer in the middle carrying Garcia and their so-called psychic, Jenna Murphy.  "But there's nothing - " 

 

"*Go* *here*." 

 

"Alright alright, we'll go *there*!"   His hands gripping the wheel, he turned left, just making the cutoff and leaving the cars behind and front of him scrambling to keep up.  "Jeesh, irritating much?" 

 

Jenna’s blue eyes turned to him, but it wasn’t her voice that scolded him from the passenger seat.  "Boy, don' make me take a cookin' spoon upside yo'r behind!" 

 

Spencer stared, startled for a moment before the sharply demanded, “well?”  goaded him into a hastily sputtered, "Yes ma'am!" 

 

Apparently their only ‘witness’ was not only actually psychic and channeling their latest victim, but others as well.  Spencer would be willing to bet that he had just been reprimanded by Abigail Summins, a 78 year old southern grandmother of 14 who, according to the loving family memorials, had had no trouble in life with tanning the behind of anyone who contradicted her.

 

Spencer didn’t think he was quite up to being the first after her death.

 

Behind him, Garcia chuckled “cooking spoon?” and Spencer groaned.  It was going to be a long drive.

 

end