Title: A Bright Future
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Adam Jackson/Spencer Reid
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: Spoilers for the Criminal Minds episode "Conflicted."
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Adam Jackson or Spencer Reid, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.***
Spencer's steps faltered as he headed down the hallway from the lobby of the mental hospital to where he'd been told Adam's room was; he hadn't been here before in the few times that he'd come to see Adam. He had always kept his visits confined to therapy sessions.
This would be the first time he'd actually seen Adam -- the real Adam -- since that day in the police station in Miami. The young man had been trapped inside his own body by his alter personality for so long that Spencer didn't even know if Adam would remember him.
That was a possibility, he told himself, taking a deep breath to steady his nerves. Adam might not remember a lot of what had happened when the BAU was in Miami; it had been a traumatic time in his life, and his alter personality had protected him from so much of it.
But Amanda was gone -- and Spencer fervently hoped that the alter personality Adam had developed would stay gone. Amanda frightened him; he was the first to admit it. She was the part of Adam that was the dangerous equation, not Adam himself.
Adam was the victim in all of this, just as much as those young men Amanda had killed had been victims. Adam was just another in that trail of destruction that Amanda had left behind -- only maybe, just maybe, Adam could be saved. Spencer was at least going to try.
Maybe everyone would think he was crazy -- but now that Adam was himself again, and there was a good chance that Amanda wouldn't come back, Spencer knew that he had to take the chance he'd been given. He would regret it for all of his life if he didn't follow his heart.
Adam had never been far out of his thoughts ever since they'd left him behind; Spencer had even gone back a few times, without telling the rest of the team, to sit in on Amanda's therapy sessions in futile attempts to convince her to release Adam for good.
It seemed that she'd finally done so, without needing to be pushed into it by his coaxing. Spencer only hoped that it was for good; he had no desire to deal with the murderous alter personality ever again. He hoped that Adam was finally free of her.
He stopped in front of the closed door to Adam's room, swallowing hard before he reached out to knock on the door. He had no idea what kind of condition he would find Adam in -- and there was a part of him that was almost afraid to have the door open to let him in.
The door swung open, and Spencer stepped inside, almost not wanting to look at the young man who stood there in front of him. But he had to meet Adam's gaze at some point, and he couldn't stop his gaze from moving to the slender figure who had stepped back from the doorway.
Adam looked different from when Spencer had seen him in the hotel -- healthier, more clear and focused. The eyes that regarded him weren't clouded and confused, as they had been when the two of them had first met; these eyes were clear, calm and lucid.
He hadn't remembered Adam being .... well, so handsome. And he was even better-looking now than he had been before; the haunted, strained look was gone, even though there was a slight frown between his brows that made him look overly serious.
Spencer was sure that he could feel his heart turning over in his chest; there was no way that he could leave this young man here, or let him try to fend for himself in the world. More than ever, he was convinced that he was making the right choice -- for both of them.
"Hey," he managed to say, unable to take his eyes from the young man standing in front of him. He didn't really know what to say; he knew that Adam had asked for him to be here, but he didn't want to bring that up, or to ask just why Adam had wanted to talk to him.
"I'm glad you came," Adam said softly, his gaze riveted on Spencer's face. "You look just the same," he said wonderingly, one hand starting to reach out towards Spencer before he hastily put them both behind his back. "I thought you might have changed."
Spencer shook his head, raising a self-conscious hand to run his fingertips through his considerably shorter hair. "I cut off a lot of my hair," he offered, smiling a little. "My teammates think it makes me look like I should be dancing around in a boy band."
Adam laughed at that, a short burst of laughter that sounded out of place in this room. "I don't think that," he said, reaching out again, less hesitantly this time. "I just -- I want to touch you. To make sure you're real and not just something I dreamed."
"I'm real, Adam," Spencer said, his heart breaking at the words. Was Adam still so afraid to come out of the darkness he'd lived in for so long, to let light and life into his world, that he couldn't bring himself to believe that there was even one person who cared about him?
He had to force himself not to reach out and touch Adam as well, as the young man's hand rested against the warmth of his cheek. It should probably feel odd to stand here with someone's hand resting on his face, but somehow, it didn't. It simply felt as though he was in the right place.
There might be others who said that he was taking on an impossible task by taking responsibility for Adam. But someone had to do it -- and Spencer knew that the young man trusted him. Besides, this was something he wanted to do.
He'd felt an attraction towards Adam from the first time they'd met -- and it had broken his heart when he'd thought that Adam was lost forever. This was a second chance, a chance for them to know each other without any barriers rising between them.
Given Adam's background and what his father had done to him when he was only a child, it wouldn't be easy for them to move forward. But Spencer was determined to try. He wanted more than anything to give Adam the sort of life he deserved, a life without constant pain and fear.
"Did you come here because I was asking about you?" Adam queried, his head tilted to one side, his gaze still fixed on Spencer's face. "Or for some other reason? Are you here because you want to be, or just because you feel some kind of responsibility for me?"
"I'm here because I want to be here," Spencer told him quietly, more than a little started at the fact that Adam's thoughts seemed to be moving along the same lines as his own were. "And because you asked for me, too. I wanted to be here for you."
"You're the only one who is," Adam whispered, his voice trembling slightly. "I burned my bridges behind me with the hotel when --" He paused, then took a deep breath and went on. "When Amanda killed all those people. I can't go back there. I don't have anywhere now."
"Yes, you do," Spencer said firmly, deciding that it was time to let Adam know what he was planning to do. "You've got a place with me. I'm taking you back to DC with me, and you can stay in my place for a while until you get back on your feet."
"But -- they'll let you do that?" Adam looked shocked, backing up a few steps and squinting at him. "I'm supposed to keep seeing my therapist. I can't just leave here. They'd never let me. They expect me to toe a line, and I don't think that includes running away."
"You're not running away," Spencer tried to explain, wishing that he hadn't jumped into this subject so quickly. "You'll be with me, and your therapist knows it. Everything's already arranged, Adam. We can leave today, if you feel like you're ready to walk out of here."
"We can?" Adam blinked, looking shocked. "You mean you'll take me home with you? Won't the rest of your team think you're dong something .... well, a little crazy?" His voice was still shaking, but Spencer thought that the tremulousness was from disbelief rather than fear.
"They might, but they can't tell me how to live my life," Spencer said, surprised to find that he believed his words even more as he spoke them aloud. The BAU was a large part of his life -- but at the moment, so was Adam. And he wasn't going to choose between the two.
Yes, the people he worked with might think he was being a little reckless -- or even crazy. But he was perfectly within his rights to bring Adam home with him, to try and help him as much as he could. He felt that he owed that much to this young man.
"So -- does that mean we can leave any time?" Adam asked, looking uncertain. "I'd have to pack some things up, but I don't want to take anything that might remind you of .... her." He almost whispered the last word, a flash of fear flitting across his features for just a moment.
That look gave Spencer pause; he hadn't realized that Adam might be afraid of his alter, now that he knew Amanda existed. Had that alter personality somehow managed to threaten him while it was the dominant personality in that one fragile body?
If that was so, then he would have to take things even more slowly with Adam. There was always a chance that Amanda might reassert herself -- and if that happened, Spencer was terrified that this time, Adam could very well disappear for good and never be allowed his freedom again.
That was a bridge they would have to cross when and if they came to it. With a smile, Spencer held out his hand to Adam, indicating the closet and the bureau next to it with his free hand. It was time to get started on Adam's packing, then he could see about booking a flight back home.
"Come on, let's get started with packing whatever you want to take with you," he said softly, feeling his heart thump against his chest. They were both taking a step forward into a whole new life, and while he wasn't sure what awaited them, he hoped that they were headed for a bright future.***
- Criminal Minds - home page
- New stories
- Reid/Morgan
- Reid/Hotch
- Reid/Gideon
- Hotch/Rossi
- Hotch/Morgan
- Hotch/Gideon
- Prentiss/JJ
- JJ/Garcia
- Prentiss/Garcia
- Morgan/Garcia
- JJ/Reid
- JJ/Morgan
- Prentiss/Reid
- Hotch/Prentiss
- Morgan/Prentiss
- Other pairings
- Gen stories