Title: Mad As A Hatter
By: Wisdom-Woman
Ratings: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Garcia x Morgan
Spoilers: None
Warnings: None.
Word Count: 849 - my shortest fic ever!
Author's note: I'm not making any money from this, so that means I'm poor, Reid-less, and I can't get sued. I also don't own Whoppers or Boston Legal.
Inspiration: Boston Legal, when Alan Sharp said 'You're as Mad as a Hatter!' in episode Race Ipsa. I also listened to Crazy by Gnarls Barkley while writing this fic.
Summary: Relaxation… William Shatner… And hilarity… What else does the Tech Goddess need? What indeed…

***

The TV was set to a pause as she sat down the bowl of popcorn, on her coffee table, she'd been popping two minutes before. The twelve ounce bottle of 7Up located next to the bowl on a coaster, she glanced at the TV and giggled. She fumbled with her hair, pulling it up into a messy up do, getting it out of her eyes as she turned back to her kitchen to grab the box of Whoppers she'd left on the island.

Her bright pink, fuzzy slippers made a muted shuffling noise on the carpet as she re-entered her living room, intent on finishing her DVD marathon of Boston Legal. Her faded blue jeans had random tears in them and her green tank top gave off the air of comfort as she flopped down onto her pillow-covered sofa. She reached for the remote and hit play as she poured the Whoppers into the bowl, mixing it up before plucking a handful out and munching.

Penelope Garcia giggled softly at Alan Sharp's quick remarks and took a swig of her drink, pay no attention to the knocking sound at her door. She watched Denny Crane as he flirted with poor Shirley and heard her door slam open, causing her chocolaty concoction to fly into the air. She let a scream tear out of her mouth as she scrambled for her Louisville Slugger.

"Garcia!"

"Derek! What the hell, honey! You could've broken my door!"

Derek Morgan stared at the bat-wielding hacker and blinked - once, twice…

"Sweetness, you gonna swing me to death?" He chuckled and moved the bat down and away from his head.

Penelope gave a frown and a shrug, "I thought I looked dangerous."

Derek chuckled once again and moved to help her as she knelt down and began to pick up the Whoppers and popcorn, the noise from the TV at a deafening volume.

"Well, no wonder you didn't hear me knocking. Sounds like the TV's too loud, baby girl."

Penelope's ears flushed softly, hidden by her bangs.

"What can I say, Boston Legal deserves to be blasted out of the speakers."

"Boston Legal - that William Shatner show?"

"Yes! Good God, that man's hilarious in this show."

"Never watched it before." Derek muttered as he took the wasted snack and threw it into the trash bin.

Penelope sputtered, eyes wide in shock as she snatched Derek's dark wrist in her pale hand and dragged him to her couch.

"Well then, Sugar, we're gonna watch my favorite episode!"

"I don't know if I should be terrified or not."

"Be terrified. Absolutely horrified, like a little girl, Sweet-cheeks."

Derek held the bridge of his nose to keep the coke from spraying out of his nose as he watched William Shatner on the little TV screen, next to him sat a joyfully tearing up Penelope - a snort escaping her lips.

"Well, well, well. My Goddess snorts."

"Oh hush, Chocolate Thunder, my favorite line's coming up!"

Morgan blinked and turned to face the screen, but kept his eyes on Penelope - he noticed her lips were moving to each word Alan Sharp was saying.

"'You're mad as a hatter!'"

Garcia bounced on her sofa, giggling hysterically as Derek snickered.

"I would love to have Spencer say that!" She cried out as the show ended and she truned the DVD player and television off.

"Well, that'd fit him." Derek muttered.

"What's wrong there, Hot Stuff?"

"Hmm, nothing. Just mulling over the hatter line."

Penelope giggled, "Trust a profiler to do that! It's a reference to Alice in Wonderland - y'know, the Mad Hatter and the March Hare?"

Derek chuckled loudly, "Halloween's coming up, Gorgeous. You be my March Hare, I'll be your Mad Hatter."

"Now you're mad as a hatter!" Penelope giggled and nudged him in the elbow as he turned the TV back on for another round of William Shatner.

"What is exciting is not for one person to be stronger than the other... but for two people to have met their match and yet they are equally as stubborn, as obstinate, as passionate, as crazy as the other." - Barbra Streisand