Title: TGIF
Author: Medic One
Pairing: Emily/JJ
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds.
Summary: Emily and JJ try to hide how they feel from the rest of the team. No one's fooled.

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"The lady doth protest too much, methinks." William Shakespeare

 

CIA Headquarters, Langley Virginia. Friday 1615 hrs.

"What the f*** is this rubbish Barbie?" Emily's shout echoed around the bullpen and a brown folder went flying across the desks, paper tearing out and landing everywhere.

JJ came to her doorway.

"It's the file you asked for, Prentiss! Why? Don't you like the folder color?"

"It's useless, you bimbo. Half the information is in the wrong sections and the other half makes no sense!"

JJ stepped forward to lean on the railing that edged the mezzanine and look down the length of the bullpen at Emily.

"Well I can only make up a packet based upon the reports you give me. If your handwriting didn't look like a drunken spider had crawled through an inkpot I might be able to produce something closer to what you want!"

Hearing the racket Hotchner appeared from his office along the walkway. "What's going on here?" Emily looked up at him, her face twisted with anger.

"Why is she here?" She called. "She's useless! She's not even a proper profiler! All she does is make goo-goo eyes at the male reporters. Her brains are all in her tits!"

"Oh, what? Checking out my tits now are you Prentiss?" JJ retorted. " Something you want to tell us?"

"That's enough, both of you!" Hotch commanded.

Emily turned on her heel and headed for the exit. "I've had enough of this madhouse! I'll see you guys on Monday."

"At least I have tits, Prentiss. At least I look like a real woman, not some skinny ass dyke who checks out other women's bodies!" JJ got in one last shot at Emily's retreating back.

"Bite me!"

David Rossi stopped next to Morgan's desk, coffee cup in hand.

"Those two are so into each other!"

Morgan grinned "Hoo yah! You don't need to be a profiler to see that!"

Reid had been engrossed in a book the whole time, looked up at Morgan's exclamation. "Who's into what?"

Emily Prentiss' Apartment building, Alexandria, Virginia. Friday 20:00 hrs.

Prentiss had driven away from FBI HQ at speed, only to be caught in the Friday afternoon rush hour. Realising the pointlessness of sitting static in her car for an hour she had pulled off I-95 and enjoyed a coffee and pastry in a Starbucks.

Finally she pulled into the car park at the rear of her apartment stopping directly under a bright street light, fully aware of the little red Toyota that had followed her for the last mile. Behind her the smaller car halted in the shade of the building. She got out and turned as its driver alighted, blonde hair and pale legs faintly visible in the darkness.

"What now Jareau? Stalking me much?"

JJ stepped into the pool of light around Emily's car. She had changed into white kitten heels and a floral patterned shirtwaister with a pale pink cashmere pashmina to protect her upper arms from the cold night air. She had taken her hair out of its tight ponytail and brushed it until it shone in the half light like spun gold. Contrary to her demeanour in the workplace she exuded an aura of gentleness and sweet innocence. Emily thought she had never looked more tender or vulnerable.

"You bet your sweet bippy Prentiss! I'd stalk you to the gates of hell and back if I had to."

Emily's stern features broke into the wide happy smile that JJ loved to see and looked for on a daily basis.

"Oh good!" and she held out her arms to enfold JJ in a warm and loving embrace. Their mouths sought each other and JJ sucked on Emily's tongue, hungrily pulling it deep into her own mouth.

Finally JJ leaned back in Emily's arms without breaking hold and fixed her lover with a quizzical smile.

"Her brains are in her tits? Seriously?"

Emily threw back her head and laughed.

"Skinny ass dyke? Seriously?" she countered.

 

"Corroborative detail intended to give artistic verisimilitude to an otherwise bald and unconvincing narrative." WS Gilbert

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