Title: Think About It
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Spencer Reid
Fandom: Doctor Who/Criminal Minds
Rating: PG-13
Table: 1, fanfic50
Prompt: 17, Think
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Spencer Reid, unfortunately. Please do not sue.

***

"You know one of the things I love most about you?" Spencer asked the Doctor as he leaned back in one of the chairs facing the large viewscreens in the control room. "That you make me think. I mean, think in ways that being in the BAU didn't."

"And what are those ways?" the Time Lord asked, turning to look at his young lover with raised eyebrows and a smile on his lips. It wasn't often that Spencer said things like that, and when he did, the Doctor always listened to him.

Spencer didnt like to talk about what his life had been like for the past few months with the BAU, and the Doctor didn't blame him for that. The young man had been battling his Dilaudid addiction, and trying to hide it from his friends and colleagues couldn't have been easy.

But he was opening up more about that time of his life now, even though he still shivered and winced when he spoke -- always briefly -- about the terrible experience that had caused his addiction, and about some of the troubles he'd had after it was over.

The Doctor had often wanted to ask Spencer what he'd thought about during that time to keep him from falling ever more deeply under the control of the man who had abducted him -- but he didn't like to bring the subject up, knowing how much pain it caused his young lover.

After all, he'd been through the same thing himself, over and over again, each time the Master had gotten the upper hand and managed to keep him under control. And he couldn't help being fearful that the same thing might happen again.

Only this time, he wasn't worried about the Master doing something to him -- no, he was worried for his lover. Spencer wouldn't know how to deal with the Master; he wasn't used to the kind of mind-bending games that the renegade Time Lord enjoyed playing.

He would just have to protect Spencer as best he could -- and if the Master ever managed to corner the two of them, he would sacrifice himself to save Spencer from falling into those nefarious clutches. No matter what he had to do, he would keep Spencer safe.

The Doctor shook off those worrisome thoughts, turning his attention back to what Spencer had said. The young man was watching him oddly, a frown between his brows, his dark gaze searching the Time Lord's face as though something was bothering him.

"You weren't really paying attention to what I was saying, were you?" he asked the Doctor, his tone soft and concerned. "You were thinking about something else entirely. And if I know you, it's something that concerns me, and how much you worry about me sometimes."

"Are you sure that you're not a telepath, Spencer Reid?" the Doctor joked, trying to deflect his lover's question. He really didn't want Spencer to know that his words had come very close to the truth, and he didn't want to try and put his thoughts into words at the moment.

"Not that I know of," Spencer told him, his frown deepening. "What were you thinking about, Doctor? I get worried when I see you looking like that. It makes me feel like you're keeping something from me. You're not, are you?" he added, his voice rising slightly.

The Doctor shook his head, glad that he was able to answer that question truthfully. "No, I'm not," he said, with a reassuring smile at Spencer. "And yes, I was listening to what you were saying. My mind just decided to take a bit of a detour for a moment, that's all."

Spencer nodded reluctantly, sitting back in his chair and continuing with what he'd been saying. "You make me think about things that I never would have thought I'd be interested in when I didn't have a real life. You know, a life with a relationship."

"Relationships aren't the only thing in life, Spencer," the Doctor said, keeping his voice soft. "I wouldn't end what we have for any reason -- unless you wanted to end it, of course -- but they're not the only thing to strive for in life. I'd have thought you were happy with what you were doing."

"I was, in a way," Spencer said slowly, as though he was searching for the right words. "But I always wanted more. I always felt like kind of a freak, because I didn't really know what those everyday, normal kinds of relationships are like."

"All of your colleagues in the BAU haven't had such great luck with relationships," the Doctor reminded him. "Look at Aaron. His marriage fell apart. And the others -- well, most of them -- aren't romantically involved. So you're not the only one."

"Yeah, but ...." Spencer's voice trailed off; he sighed and shrugged, not looking at the Doctor. "Now that I've met you, I still don't know what a normal relationship is like, because we're definitely not normal. But I don't think I'd want something that most people would call normality."

"You and I aren't what anyone would call normal people, love," the Doctor said with a soft laugh. "So why should we settle for a relationship that seems normal to most? I'm happy with what we have. As long as you're here with me, I need nothing else."

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere else," Spencer told him, a smile crossing his features. "But what I mean about you making me think is -- you make me realize that I don't have to be like everybody else. That I don't have to fit in. That I can be loved for just being me."

"And you never realized that before with anyone?" The Doctor was surprised by those words; he'd thought that Spencer hadn't really cared what others had thought about him when he was living on Earth, but he had obviously been wrong about that.

"I always wanted to be more like other people, even though I was never really sure about how to conform when it came to relationships," Spencer admitted, a slight blush pinkening his cheeks. "Until I met you, I thought I'd be awkward about relationships forever."

"You and I will never be like other people, Spencer." The Doctor's voice was still soft, but there was an undertone of firmness to his words. "I accepted long ago that I was never going to fit in, either with my own race or with any other. And that really isn't so bad."

"It's never been about 'fitting in' for me," Spencer mused, thinking aloud. "Well, it was when I was a little kid. But now .... it's more about wanting what other people always seemed to have and I never thought I could, because I was so different. Until now."

"So what do you think about relationships now, from the vantage point of being in one that works?" the Doctor asked, smiling as he leaned back in his chair. "I'd like to know if you think it's better or worse to have your heart involved with someone, as opposed to being free."

"Being unencumbered has its advantages -- sometimes," Spencer said softly, reaching out to take the Doctor's hand. "But it's way better to be in love. To know that you've got somebody in your life and in your heart who you care about more than anything else in the world."

"It's good to know that you think that way," the Doctor murmured, looking down at the floor. This time, it was his turn to blush; even after nine hundred years and more, he was still unused haring such a compliment about himself.

"I always will," Spencer told him, squeezing his hand. "I finally feel like I can put all the things aside that I used to cling to, because they were what made me special -- being a genius and all that. Now, I can just be myself, and I know that you'll love me because of that."

"I'd love you no matter what," the Doctor said firmly, entwining his fingers more tightly with Spencer's. "I never thought I'd have a relationship like this either, love. And thanks to you, after nine hundred years, I do. You don't know what that means to me."

Spencer nodded, his smile growing wider. "And now, I can think about things that really matter. You and me, and our future. And how being in love has changed me so much -- for the better. What I did with the BAU was important -- but it's time for me to think about my own life."

"It seems to me that your life got off to a good start with your experiences in the BAU," the Doctor added. "And now, you're just adding to those experiences -- but in a different area of your life. And I hope that I'll be able to make that just as rewarding."

"I'm looking forward to having all of those experiences with you," Spencer said with a smile, leaning over to brush his lips against the softness of the Doctor's mouth. As their lips met, the two of them melted into an embrace, one that neither of them ever wanted to end.

***