Title: Fairy Tale Gone Well
By: TheLovethief
Pairing: JJ/Reid
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: PG
A/N: Just one short silly piece for in between. This is not to be taken serious! No offence intended ;)
Disclaimer: Not necessary in this case, I suppose.
Summary: A brave young man finally gets what he wants. Parody!

***

Oscar Wilde once said: "Illusion is the first of all pleasures."

Once upon a time there was a young handsome knight who lived alone in a big city called Quantico.

Together with a group of six other very skilled knights he traveled through the whole country to catch evil monsters.

Those were his adventures. The young lad used to claim to be quite happy with his life. Due to his enormous intellect he was able to contribute important facts that were mostly helpful to solve the riddles they called "cases". That was rather satisfying for our knight.

But as soon as he arrived at his empty house the young man felt very lonely. There was no one at home to share his exciting adventures with.

Every now and then he headed off to visit his dear mother who spent her life in a far city called Las Vegas. She would often listen to his tales and be very proud of her gifted son.

Unfortunately the mother was very sick and sometimes not able to recognize him when he came around. This made him very sad. Because the young knight possessed a miraculous memory he could remember the time when he had been a little boy very vividly.

His heart ached when he thought back to the day his father had left him and his mother. The father was a knight himself, but not a very brave one. He went away to explore the world and find fortune somewhere else.

His son, our hero, had cared for his mother many years, until he had to move on and fulfill his duty as a grown-up knight. He was still feeling very guilty because he had to leave his beloved mother. And the poor lad himself felt so lonesome because sometimes she was angry with him and mad and didn't want to talk to him. Then there was no one at all he could tell about his dangerous and heroic adventures.

"Why am I always so alone", our knight wondered when he was back at home and he cried bitterly.

But in this very cold night when even the moon seemed to be laughing at him a new idea came to the knight. "I have to start a family! Find a beautiful wife and have a lot of children!"

Why had he never thought of this before? Once he had an own family he'd never be alone again. But there was a big problem. The young man was not aware of his own beauty and found it hard to talk to women. He decided to sleep a bit and think about a plan later.

The following day the famous group of knights started a new adventure. They chose to go there by plane, because it was so much faster than their horses.

Even though there was no round table in this mechanical dragon, the team of brave warriors sat in a circle. They spoke about the unknown monster which had killed so many innocent maids and lads and they agreed that this evil entity had to be caught.

Our young hero, however, didn't listen to their conversation because his heart and his eyes were both captured by the most lovely thing he had ever seen. Her hair was like gold and framed her beautiful face. Her eyes were blue like the sea or the purest sapphire ever found in the world.

When their gazes met his heart felt like melting and breaking at once. Suddenly the young knight knew for sure that this and only this heavenly creature was meant to be the mother of his unborn children.

Regrettably the lovely heroine didn't seem to notice how badly he wanted her to be his wife for all times. So he waited until all the other knights were asleep and cried bitterly again.

The adventure turned out to be a very difficult one. The monster they were told to stop was very wise and hid somewhere in the dark forest.

Our young knight was just wandering along the street alone. It was almost dark and he was very afraid of the unfamiliar noises he could here around him.

Suddenly he found himself surrounded by a bright pink light and a strange translucent woman with long silver hair appeared right in front of him. Wide-eyed he looked at her and couldn't say a thing because he was so scared.

She spoke to him: "You must save her before it is too late! Go to the place where it is always dark, where the trees are older than any man can ever be and where the squirrels play!" And with that the figure disappeared.

For some reason the young lad knew instantly that the mysterious fairy lady had meant that his golden-haired love was in danger and he ran towards the forest to rescue her.

The monster that had taken her was already awaiting him. And there at the edge of the woods began an enthralling fight between the evil creature and our young hero.

Our young hero won.

He cut the thick rope the beautiful maid had been bound with and she fell into his arms and her tears moistened his vest. Suddenly she realized how much she loved this equally beautiful young man and when he asked her if she wanted to become his wife she said: "Yes!"

And as soon as they arrived at his house back in the city called Quantico they started to start a family.

Nine months later their first son was born and he had the golden hair and the sapphire blue eyes of his mother and was already reciting books from the 16th century.

And they continued reproducing and were never on their own again and lived happily ever after.

FIN