Title: A Torchwoody Christmas
By: BellaGwen
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: AO
Disclaimer: Torchwood and its characters belong to the BBC, not me. I'm just having some not-for-profit fun.
Summary: It's Christmas at Torchwood. There are presents, a weevil hunt, kissing and angst.

***

"Right, now that we are all here we can begin," Gwen Cooper was beaming a smile at her Torchwood colleagues as Ianto Jones walked into the conference room, carrying a tray of cups.

She was standing at Jack's usual place, at the head of the table, because this little event had been all her idea. Jack, Owen and Tosh watched her with varying degrees of smiles.

Tosh had been all for it. They'd never really marked Christmas at Torchwood before, but when Gwen had suggested they do a Secret Santa and decorate the place she had to admit it sounded like fun.

Ianto quickly put a cup down in front of each of them and took his own seat.

Owen sniffed the cup. "What is this?" he looked at Ianto with a grimace.

"Egg nog," Ianto gave Owen his best innocent smile. "I thought I'd get into the spirit."

Jack laughed out loud. "This is great Ianto, haven't had it in years," he took a mouthful with relish.

Tosh pretended to ignore her mug, looking politely at Gwen. They'd got off to a rocky start, she remembered, but now with the season of goodwill, she knew they were friends. She smiled, remembering Gwen's outrage when she told her they didn't put up a Torchwood Christmas Tree.

******

About two weeks before Gwen had stumbled to her desk dragging bags of shopping, an amount Tosh thought was impossible to amass in just one lunch hour.

"I love Christmas," she had almost yawned as she fell into her chair and gratefully accepted a mug of coffee from the attentive Ianto.

"So when are we putting up our tree then?" she'd asked. There was no reply from Ianto, Tosh or even Owen, who had come over to see what she'd brought back with her.

Seeing it was just shopping Owen lost interest straight away and was half way back to his desk when she asked.

"What would we want with a tree in this place?" he laughed "It'd only make more work for Ianto here, wouldn't it?"

"You're kidding?" Gwen was sitting up straight in her chair now. "No tree? What about decorations, surely you..." she trailed off seeing Tosh shake her head.

"I put a fairy lights screensaver on my pc," Tosh offered.

Ianto shrugged. "I brought in mince pies last year... or was that the year before...." He was half talking to himself.

"Jack," Gwen called as she saw him emerge up the stairs form the holding cells. "Is this true? No Christmas decorations?"

Jack smiled cautiously, not having heard the start of the conversation. "No Christmas decorations where? Have you found a bauble eating alien for us?"

Gwen wasn't impressed.

"Here, in the Hub," she gestured around. "We need some decorations."

"Never saw the need," Jack shrugged and turned towards his office.

"Well then," Gwen was determined, "now you've got me and we are having decorations."

Owen looked at Tosh who quickly looked away, stifling a giggle.

When they arrived the next morning it was to find Jack holding a ladder, with Ianto atop, fixing a fairy to the tree, under the direction of Gwen.

"Perfect!" she stood back. "All done. What do you think?"

She had put tinsel around the stair banisters, there were santas on everyone's computer and she had put a rather large tree in the middle of the room, covered in sparkly decorations and topped off with the angel she had made Ianto place.

"Bet you a fiver Myfanway's having that for breakfast," Owen whispered to Tosh, nodding towards the angel. The laugh was quickly disguised by a sudden fit of coughing.

"This is lovely Gwen," she managed when she recovered. "You must have been here all night."

"Tell me about it," Jack complained, picking a piece of holly from his hair and looking at it like it was a small alien. "Next time anyone wakes me up at 5 am to put thorny leaves on the walls I'm sacking you."

There was no spoiling Gwen's festive mood. "Now we have somewhere to put out presents," she smiled around at her colleagues.

"Don't do presents," Owen's voice came from behind a small mountain of Santa and holly.

"But we have to have presents," Gwen looked puzzled. "Not big ones or anything, but something."

"We've never exchanged presents here," Ianto agreed with Owen. "Had a few good nights out though." Both Owen and Jack could be heard chuckling at their respective desks.

"What happens at the Christmas party stays at the Christmas part Ianto," Jack called.

"I was saying nothing, sir," Ianto grinned as he headed off to make some coffee. He hadn't even been able to turn on the machine before Gwen corralled him into decorating the tree.

"Well we might as well do it properly," Gwen decided for them, grabbing a sheet of paper and a pen.

"You lot come here," she called everyone back. They watched as she wrote each of their names out, tore up the paper and folded each piece up small. She threw them into a clean cup and shook it.

"Now, everyone take a name, don't say who, but buy them a present and we can exchange them before Christmas," she offered the cup around.

"Ooo, secret santa!" Tosh squealed, "This is like being back in school." She picked out a piece of paper first and went off to her desk to open it.

Jack and Ianto did as they were told, pocketing the paper pieces, Ianto grinning happily.

But Gwen had to walk over to Owen's desk where the sound of some loud shoot-em-up was coming from his computer.

"Owen?" she said expectantly, offering the cup.

"Told ya, don't do presents," he kept staring at the screen. "Yes!' he hissed as a giant, blobby thing exploded on the screen. He turned around to smile at her. "But seeing as it's you freckles," he picked out a paper piece.


Gwen stuck out her tongue as she went back to her own desk. Carefully reopening the piece of paper she had folded up a few minutes before she smiled as she read: ‘Jack'

******

Two weeks later it was early afternoon on Christmas Eve and they were all sitting around the conference room with a small pile of brightly wrapped parcels. Gwen had been surprised that for a small office where everybody knew everything about everyone they had all managed to keep to themselves just who their Secret Santas were. She tried a few times to find out who had picked out her name but all she got was Owen joking he was buying Myfanway a nice bottle of barbeque sauce.

The Christmas Tree fairy twinkled in at them, having survived un-eaten, unlike the holly which Myfanway had found quite tasty.

In the middle of the conference table was a plateful of mince pies that Rhys had baked the night before. He wasn't pleased when Gwen had said she was going in to work on Christmas Eve, and they had had a row, but she'd found his peace offering this morning with a note saying take them to work. They'd gone down well. Owen had eaten three while they were waiting for Ianto.

"Who wants to go first then?" Gwen looked around. The men were suddenly very interested in the ground, in the eggnog, in the mince pies.

"I'll go," Tosh had a semi-excited, semi-nervous look on her face. "Happy Christmas Owen," she said handing him a large, square but thin package.

"Thanks Tosh," he took it looking a bit embarrassed.

"Well open it then," an excited Gwen urged.

Owen ripped off the paper to reveal a framed Japanese art print. He held it out at arms reach and admired it. "This is really nice Tosh, thanks."

She smiled back, a little bashful.

"Right Owen, you go next," Gwen prompted again.

He sighed and picked up the smallest box on the table. "Happy Christmas Ianto," he handed the box across the table, not looking Ianto in the eye. He felt really weird buying a bloke a present.

Ianto looked very pleased when he opened the box to reveal a pair of silver cufflinks.

"Nice," Jack nodded, looking over his shoulder, "you went to a real jewellers Owen."

"Was getting a present for my mum," Owen muttered.

"How is your mum Owen?" Tosh asked brightly.

"Same as ever, mumsy," he rolled his eyes.

"Next!" Gwen was not being sidetracked.

"That would be me then," Ianto said. He picked up a package and handed it to Gwen. "For our head designer," he joked.

She opened the box that she recognised as being from a very expensive Cardiff department store to reveal the most beautiful white, cashmere sweater. "This is gorgeous Ianto!" she exclaimed and threw her arms around him.

His eyes wide with surprise he hugged her back.

She admired it again before remembering. "That just leaves me and Jack — Happy Christmas boss," she handed a small parcel to Jack.

He had a curious expression on his face as he opened it. Gwen was watching him closely.

They saw his face freeze as he revealed a photo frame. Only Jack could see the picture that was in it.

"Gwen... how?" He looked stunned.

"It's your... your Dad, with Estelle, you know, during the war. I was talking to some of my mates from the station and they told me no-one had claimed her stuff. So I kinda helped myself.... I hope you don't mind....." Gwen spoke quickly.

Jack touched the photo and smiled softly. "This is perfect Gwen. Thank you."

"You're welcome," she smiled at him. "Now don't you have something for Tosh?"

"Yes, yes I do. Sorry Tosh," he handed the final present across the table. "I saw it and thought of you."

"Oh my god Jack," Tosh's eyes were wide open in surprise as she revealed a very old book.

"You got her a second hand book?" Owen raised his eyebrows.

"Owen, this is a first edition Dickens," Tosh flicked it open, "and.... Oh," she caught her breath, "Jack is this real?" She held up the book to show an inky scrawl-like autograph across a page.

Jack nodded.

"A friend of mine gave it to me a while back, but I think it's going to have a much better home with you," he said.

She looked like he was going to cry with happiness, but before she could Owen spoke up: "Right can we go to lunch now?" he said in a bored voice.

"Owen," Tosh hissed. "What?" he looked innocent.

"Got anymore of that eggnog Ianto," Jack asked as they got up to file out of the room.

Ianto looked pleased someone liked his concoction and was about to pour a mug when Jack's mobile phone started to ring.

Everyone stopped what they were doing as they heard Jack say "good afternoon Chief Inspector..... yes..... right.... Tell me where......"

Gwen, Owen, Tosh and Ianto looked at each other. There was dread but also anticipation in their expressions.

Jack snapped his phone shut.

"Anyone up for a quick Christmas Weevil hunt?" he grinned.

***

Driving Home for Christmas

The absolute last thing any member of Torchwood wanted to be doing on Christmas Eve was working. But as they sat in the range rover, slowly making their way across town through the last minute shoppers, the adrenaline was still pounding through all their veins.

Tosh was making some calculations on her computer. "If you take the next left we should avoid the worst of the traffic," she advised Jack.

"Why can't we just send in an exterminator,' Owen muttered. He'd had plans for this afternoon. He was annoyed.

"Come on Owen, it's not like you had anything better to do,' Gwen teased. "At least it's got me out of drinks with Rhys's weird cousins."

Now he was even more annoyed. His original plan for the afternoon would have saved Gwen from her ‘in-laws' too. But she wouldn't know that now.

Ianto was happily humming ‘Deck the Halls with Boughs of Holly' as he fiddled with his new cufflinks. He'd put them in straight away and was quite pleased and touched with Owen's gift. He didn't buy the ‘mother' story for a minute though.

Sitting behind Jack he could see Owen's side profile and saw him grimace when Gwen mentioned Rhys and his family.

Jack was barking orders at Tosh, looking for information on where they were going.

The phone call he had received earlier was from one of the top ranking policemen in Cardiff. Not many of them had his number, and when it was Christmas Eve even less were actually on duty.

"Captain Harkness, we have a problem," the Chief Inspector had said. "I think we've got one of your creatures." He'd given Jack the details of some strange happenings at a school. A woman had telephoned her locals station when she noticed movement in the building, when it was supposed to be closed for the children's' Christmas break.

The first policeman on the scene, a newly qualified recruit who'd been landed with the Christmas shift, had almost wet himself when he was chased by some kind of animal. It didn't take long for the alarm to go to Torchwood. No police officer felt like being brave on Christmas Eve.

The jeep pulled up to the gate of the school and the five Torchwood team members jumped out.

A worried looking middle aged man, wrapped in a big wool coat and looking worried, was waiting for them at the front gate. They'd been told to expect the caretaker.

"Captain Jack Harkness," Jack marched straight up to the man.

The man shook hands quickly and pointed to the school. "I've unlocked the gate, and the front door is open." He didn't need to be told to stay back; he rushed off as soon as Jack nodded his understanding.

All five walked quickly to the building, pausing at the front door. They could see it had been forced; the wood was splintered where the door swung open in the cold wind.

Jack gave quick ordered in a muted voice. "We need to find this bastard and get out with as little damage as possible." He led the way into the school entrance hall.

Inside was still, the quiet of an abandoned building, and cold. The heat had been turned off during the holidays.

Their footsteps echoed down the long, dim corridor.

"Spread out, yell if you find something," Jack whispered. "Tosh, Ianto, that way," he gestured to the right. "Owen, Gwen, with me." He started down the longer corridor.

As quietly as they could the teams opened classroom doors, checking inside. They found nothing on the ground floor.

Tosh and Ianto crept up the wide stairs to the first floor.

At the other end of the building Jack was faced with a choice. A stairs rose to the upper level, but another descended to the basement.

"I'll take this one," he pointed down into the dark. "I want you two to go up there."

"No, Jack, we should stick together," Gwen hissed.

"Go," he pushed her towards the stairs and stepped down. He heard her muttering over the com and quickly shushed her.

The stairs turned a corner after the first several steps, plunging Jack into darkness and causing him to turn on his torch. He walked on cautiously. All was silent.

******

Gwen and Owen held their handguns out in front of them as they reached the top of the stairs. They could hear the soft echoes of Ianto and Tosh opening doors, from the distance.

It was still early afternoon but the day was dark and the corridor gloomy, not many windows. As they slid along the walls they pushed open doors. Still finding nothing.

"Maybe it's gone," Owen whispered.

On cue they heard a crash from further down the corridor and they were running towards it, pelting around the bend in the middle of the corridor.

There was no sign of Tosh or Ianto, but there was a clattering sound from the nearest classroom.

Owen and Gwen came to a halt near the open classroom door. They made no sound. "Go!" Owen mouthed silently and Gwen sprung, gun first, through the door.

Adrenaline was pumping through her veins, overtaking any fear she felt.

Bursting into the gloom she scanned the room quickly. In a corner she recognised Tosh and Ianto, on the floor, in a mess of Christmas decorations and books.

"Oh for fuck sake," Owen cursed quietly.

"What happened?" Gwen asked helping them to their feet.

Tosh looked embarrassed. "I thought there was someone in here, I came in the door and saw a face staring at me. I dived out of the way...."

"Taking me with her," Ianto grimaced and rubbed his elbow.

"What did you see?" Gwen asked.

"This," Owen said with sarcasm as he pointed to a life-sized Christmas Crib on the wall behind the door.

"Sorry," Tosh muttered, "It startled me."

They were still talking quietly.

"Why are bothering to whisper. That racket would have woken the dead," Owen was still complaining.

"Shush grumpy guts," Gwen gave him a dig with her elbow. "Right. There's nothing up here. That means Jack needs our help. Come on."

They split into two groups again, going the opposite direction to the stairs they had come up.

******

Gwen and Owen had just reached the end of the main staircase when Owen held out hand to stop Gwen walking on. "Hear that?" he was barely audible. Gwen nodded. From what looked like a cloakroom they could hear a snuffling sound.

A look of determination set on Owen's face as he moved forward slowly. Gwen hung back just long enough to activate her com and say "found one" over the open link to Jack, Tosh and Ianto.

She had moved off after Owen when a breathless and hasty response from Jack came. "Bit busy. Can you deal?"

"Jack's got one too," Gwen whispered as quietly as she could, creeping up behind Owen. "We're on our own."

"Just great," he muttered.

It was hard to see in the large room. Long coat racks stretched across the room, almost meeting the wall at each end, just leaving a gap wide enough for school children to pass. It was a tight squeeze for Gwen and Owen to pass.

The room was dark. The only light from the long, narrow windows near the ceiling.

But as they made their way along the room Gwen and Owen could see the moving, bulky shadow of a weevil in the very far corner. It seemed to be searching left coats and jackets, ripping them apart, probably looking for food.

Gwen tapped Owen on the shoulder and indicated she would approach the weevil from the other side.

They were almost upon it before the animal stopped what it was doing and sniffed the air. It uttered a low, angry growl as it picked up the scent of humans.

Then suddenly it was moving swiftly in the direction of Owen. Lumbering without grace but with speed until Owen fired a shot into the air, stunning it. But only for a moment then it swiped out at Owen, causing him to duck.

He yelled at Gwen just as he heard the deafening explosion-noise of her gun. The weevil roared in pain in front of him, but had stopped moving forward.

It turned around, roaring, and limped a few steps in Gwen's' direction before she squeezed off another round. It took three more shots before the weevil fell to the ground, jerking and making a strangled noise.

Neither Gwen nor Owen moved for a full minute. Watching the animal grow still. It was bleeding across the floor.

When he was sure it was dead Owen jumped over the corpse and ran to Gwen, gathering her into his arms.

"You ok?" he asked. She was gasping for breath, holding on to Owen. She hated shooting anything, even a vicious weevil and he knew that.

"I'm fine," she managed, "you?"

"Not a scratch," he grinned.

"Good," she smiled back. "Ok. Let's find the others."

They made their way towards the entrance to the basement less worried about keeping quiet, considering the gunshots would have alerted any living thing in the area.

Long before they came to the stairs they could hear shouting from below.

Running down the steps they realised it was pitch dark down there. Somewhere in the distance a torch beam moved rapidly against the wall, as if the person holding it was running, jerking around.

"Jack, Ianto, Tosh?" Gwen called.

"Here," Tosh's voice came back from close by. She appeared out of the gloom. "If it comes this way I've got it."

"I'll stay with you," Gwen volunteered. Owen set off with his torch to find Jack and Ianto.

It took a few minutes for his eyes to get used to the dark, even with his torch, but he could hear the weevil and the shouts of Jack and Ianto as they tried to fore the animal out into the light.

Then he found Jack. His arm was bloody and he no longer carried a gun.

"What happened to you?" Owen cast a doctor's eye over the scratched arm.

"Got a bit close," Jack said wryly. "Lost my damn gun, but I found this in the caretaker's office." He held up a curved sword.

"Show and tell must be better then when I was in school," Owen observed.

Any further comment was cut off by a yell from Ianto. It sounded like he was in the next room.

"Jack..... in here...."

The other two men rushed to help.

The weevil was advancing on Ianto, who was backed into a corner. "My gun's jammed," he yelled in panic, seeing Jack and Owen appear in the doorway.

"Oi, ugly, pick on someone your own size," Owen shouted and threw his torch and the animal's back, trying to get the weevils attention. It worked.

It turned, growling and roaring in anger.

"Here we go again," Owen muttered, training his gun on the weevil as he edged to the left of the room. Jack went right, unnoticed by the weevil that was following the sound of Owen's continued insults.

Jack motioned to Ianto to get out of the room as he circled around behind the animal. It was moving towards Owen, but slowly.

Jack saw his chance. Trusting the blade in his hands would be sharp enough he raised it high over his head and with as much force as he could he swung it down and across the neckline of the weevil.

The roaring stopped. There was a gurgle and then a spurt of blood. The weevil fell straight to the floor and as it hit the hard ground the clean wound the sword had made became clear as the weevil's head rolled across the floor, away from the dead body.

Slowly Owen lowered his gun. "Bloody hell!"

******

It was a long, messy clean up. Even after they found the light switches and could see what they were doing.

Capturing a weevil was always preferable, Jack often repeated to his team, they were stupid beasts who didn't know any better, but some days they bastards were just so vicious there was no other way.

It was nearly midnight before the team finished the clean up and disposal tasks and found themselves back in The Hub.

Sitting around the boardroom table with Jack, Gwen and Tosh, Owen was the first to moan that it was Christmas Eve and the pizza place was long closed.

But as if on cue Ianto appeared up the stairs with a stack of pizza boxes.

"How did you get these?" an amazed Tosh asked.

Ianto grinned at the surprised and grateful faces. "All part of the job."

And then it was like they had never left after the Secret Santa present swapping, the atmosphere in the boardroom lifted.

There was a rush for pizza slices, the conversation laughing and joking, everyone in good spirits.

Jack pulled the ring on his can of coke and held it up to his colleagues, his friends. "A toast," he said, "to Christmas."

"Christmas," the other four echoed, laughing.

***

i Let's be naughty (and save Santa the trip!)




"Go home, eat brussles sprout, open your gifts, have a good Christmas people," Jack had dismissed his crew in the early hours of Christmas Day.

"Bloody weevils. Don't know why we can't just send an exterminator," Owen muttered as they descended the stairs from the conference room.

"Happy Christmas everyone, see you all in two weeks," Gwen smiled as she pulled on her coat.

"I am so jealous of you. All that sun and sand," Toshiko said as they walked out of the conference room together.

"It was Rhys's idea, said we hadn't been away in ages, bless him, I think he misses me being away so much now that I work here," Gwen told her.

Owen was following behind the two girls, pretending not to listen to the conversation.

At the end of the stairs Gwen turned a different direction to Tosh. "You not coming?" Tosh asked her.

"You go on Tosh, I just want to get a few things from my desk before I go," Gwen lied.

Tosh wished her a Happy Christmas and went off towards the lift.

Gwen didn't go her own desk though; she crossed to Owen's, where he was rifling through a drawer in his desk.

"Any chance of a lift home then, doctor Harper?" she gave him a cheeky grin.

He didn't smile back.

"Haven't you packing to be doing or something?" he snapped.

Gwen looked hurt.

"Owen....," she pleaded, her tone now soft, "don't be like this. It was a present from Rhys, I knew nothing about it till it was all booked and paid for."

"I'm not bothered," Owen shrugged. "Why would I be bothered that you're going away with your boyfriend?"

Gwen heard him sneer the word boyfriend.

"Oh be like that then," she said and turned on her heel to walk away. She had only gone a few steps when Owen caught up with her.
"It's not safe for a bird to be walking home on her own at this hour. Come on, I'm going your way," he waved his keys at her.

Gwen followed him towards the garage, not saying anything. As they passed Jack's office they saw their boss deep in conversation with Ianto.

The drive across the city centre took place in silence.

"Snowing," Owen had grunted as they pulled out of the garage but Gwen had murmured some in response he couldn't hear.

2 a.m. on Christmas morning they were the only vehicle on the roads of Cardiff and it wasn't long before Owen pulled up outside the building where Gwen had her flat.

He parked at the kerbside and turned off the engine.

Gwen made no attempt to get out. They watched the snowflakes building on the windscreen.

"I'm sorry for being rude."
"I don't want to go."

They both spoke at the same time.

"You go," Owen half smiled.

Gwen still wasn't looking at him when she said: "I think he knows Owen. I think Rhys knows I'm different. I think this is his way of getting us together, to be normal again."

She heard, and felt, Owen sigh beside her.

She finally turned to look at him. "Ask me not to go Owen and I'll stay." She grabbed his hands in hers; pleading with him to get her out of the mess she was in.

He shook his head sadly.

"I can't tell you what to do Gwen."

"Owen..."

He hated the pain in her voice.

She let go of his hands and sat back in the passenger seat.

They sat in silence for another minute.

"Look," Owen broke the silence, "I know I said I didn't do Christmas presents but," he paused. "Well, I got you something."

He pulled a small box out of his jacket pocket and held it out to her.
"What's this Owen?" Gwen was confused.

"Happy Christmas," he smiled at her opening the box.

"Oh Owen.... It's gorgeous," Gwen gasped as she the small box held a chain with a tiny, round diamond pendant. "It's like the one I showed Tosh in that window the other week..." she looked up from the box to his expectant face.

"Yeah, well, I might have been listening," Owen admitted.

There was a strange expression on his face. Gwen couldn't quite make it out... then she realised it was expectant, nervous. She'd never seen him like this.

She smiled. "It's gorgeous, you're gorgeous Owen Harper."

Gwen planted a kiss on his lips then took the box from him, and fastened the pendant around her neck.

Owen sat back and watched as Gwen flipped down the sun visor and admired herself in the small mirror.

"This must have cost you a fortune Owen."

"Meh.... It's only money," he grinned. "Anyway, it suits ya."

"Owen...." Gwen didn't know what to say.

"I know. You love it but you can't wear it. Rhys will wonder where you got it," Owen shrugged.

"No, it's not that...."

Gwen couldn't get the words out.

"Owen I do love Rhys. I do."

"It's not me you have to convince honey," Owen sounded bitter.

"Owen" Gwen sighed. She shivered.

"You're getting cold. Go in to your boyfriend."

"No."

There was another long silence.

Gwen shivered again.

"Oh come here you silly cow," Owen pulled off his leather jacket and threw it around her shoulders. As he pulled it closed around her he pulled Gwen closer to him.
"We don't need to talk about this now. You enjoy the sun, don't think about us in the dirty slush back here. I'll be here when you get back. If... you know," he shrugged.

Gwen looked pained.

"Oh god please don't cry on me," Owen tried to joke.

Gwen reached up her hand to Owen's face. "I'll miss you." She managed a weak smile.

"I'll miss you too," Owen was deadly serious, he leaned in to her hand. Then he turned his head and softly kissed the tips of her fingers.

He looked at Gwen to see here eyes were closed. Smiling to himself he leaned across the short space between them and touched is lips to hers.

The kiss was soft and gentle. Nothing like their usual frantic lovemaking.

Owen let go of the jacket he'd been holding closed around Gwen and moved his hands to her waist. Under his jacket she was warm and he longed to be closer to her, to be pressing his body against hers.

"Mmmmmm." He felt Gwen smile into the kiss. "You didn't do that under the mistletoe this afternoon," she grinned at him.

"You know there's only one woman I kiss under the mistletoe. And we wouldn't want to disappoint Tosh now, would we?" Owen teased.

This time it was Gwen initiated the kiss. She pulled Owen to her because suddenly she felt possessive and desperate to kiss him. She knew the Tosh thing was a joke, it didn't matter, but she knew she didn't want to share Owen with anyone.

"I want you," she gasped, breaking the kiss only long enough to say the words.

"You'll freeze."

"I don't care. I don't want to wait two weeks. I want you now Owen," Gwen was almost pleading.

"Right," Owen pulled away completely, leaving Gwen looking surprised and a bit lost.

He turned the key in the ignition. "You won't be missed if you're out an extra half hour." He pulled away from the kerb and sped back across the city.

Taking the lift to Owen's flat felt like an eternity. He'd dragged her all the way from the car to the lift and when the doors opened he stabbed the button for his floor and was pressing her against the wall and kissing her hungrily before the doors even closed.

His shirt was unbuttoned and Gwen's jeans belt was unbuckled by the time the doors reopened across from Owens front door.
He fumbled with his keys and had to pull away from their kiss to find the lock. Gwen let out a moan of disappointment but then they were inside the hall and Owen kicked the door shut behind them.

Gwen stumbled backwards until her back met the wall across from the door. Owen pressed his body against her, breaking apart to pull her t-shirt over her head and pull off his shirt.

He was kissing her again as he felt her hand go down to his jeans and pull open the buttons.

Somewhere in the back of his mind Owen remembered a half thought about wanting to bring Gwen back so they would be warm and comfortable, but that didn't matter now. He just wanted to be inside her, to possess her.

He kicked his jeans away as he pushed hers down from her waist. They were standing in a pool of clothes now.

He put one arm around her waist, pulling her even closer, feeling her soft warm skin against his. With his other hand he touched her breast, gentle rubbing the nipple the way he knew she liked it.

"Oh Owen," Gwen moaned as his hand moved to touch her between her legs.

It was his turn to moan when he felt how wet she was. He wanted to say her name but it caught in his throat. He couldn't speak words, he couldn't even think about anything other than fucking her.

Grabbing her by the arse with both his hands he lifted her up until she was pinned against the wall by his weight and her legs were wrapped around him.

He felt her hands on his cock as she guided it into her. This wasn't a time for playing and she didn't try.

They moaned together as Owen pushed his cock into her. They weren't soft and romantic. Gwen was sure, later, that the cuts on his back were from where she'd gripped him, even if he insisted it was a weevil swipe.

And she knew she would have bruises on her back from where she'd been thrown backward with each of Owen's thrusts into her.

But now she didn't care.

Owen pressed his face against her neck and he held her tight and fucked her against the wall.

With each thrust he rubbed against her.

"Ohgodowen," Gwen gasped as she felt his insides start to burn. She gripped his back even tighter. She could feel his hot, ragged breath on her skin.

Then she couldn't breathe and it felt like every muscle in her body was contracting. "Owen," she knew she was loud. She didn't care, she wanted him to know.

His eyes squeezed shut Owen gasped as he felt her tighten around him and with a final thrust he came, moaning incoherently.

For the next few minutes there was nothing but the sound of their panting breaths. Gently Owen lowered Gwen, sliding out of her as he did. But neither of them moved, their bodies pressed together, sticky and warm.

"Come on," Owen muttered after a while and lead Gwen by the hand to his bed.

"Set the alarm Owen," Gwen whispered as he threw back the plain white duvet. He did, and then joined her under the cover.

They lay face to face, not quite touching, smiling. "You are a kinky bitch Gwen Cooper," he teased.

"Yeah but you love it," she shot back with her cheekiest grin.

Owen seemed to take a deep breath and then wrapped his arms around Gwen and pulled her tight against him so her head was on his chest. "I love you so much," he said desperately, resting his chin on the top of her head.

Gwen had to struggle against him to push back far enough so that she could look up into his face. "What did you just say?" she looked puzzled. He'd never said that to her before.

"You heard me," he was embarrassed. Inside he was cursing himself for being so stupid. ‘Love her, how the bloody hell can I love her. That's not what this is about.' But he knew he did. He adored the woman.

He braced himself for the onslaught of abuse he knew Gwen would hurl at him for making things complicated, messy, difficult.

But she said nothing. Just smiled. And lay back as close to him as she could.

"Good," he heard her muffled voice.

And he smiled too.

He didn't want to sleep. He'd set the alarm for an hour and he planned to stay awake and savour every second he had with Gwen before... well he wasn't going to think of that now.

But it seemed like the very next moment the blare of the alarm woke him up. Gwen was already up, dressed and seemed to be putting a mug of coffee beside him just as it went off.
They didn't say much as he quickly got dressed and they went back down to his car. It was still dark and snowing when they pulled up outside Gwen's flat for the second time that morning. Already one or two lights inside houses on the street were ablaze. The first kids checking on their Santa haul.

This time Owen left the engine running. "Well merry Christmas and all that," he tried to sound cheerful.

Gwen smiled at him in a way that made him feel like a teenager with a crush. She laced her fingers through his and copied his gesture from earlier, kissing each one of them, her eyes locked with Owen.

"I know you want me to say it Owen, but I just can't," she was apologetic. He felt a vague falling sensation in the pit of his stomach.

"Oh but don't look so worried," she smiled, "I am coming back to you ... and I am going to let you say that to me again."

"I might have changed my mind."

"You won't."

She squeezed his hands in hers and he knew she felt the same, she just couldn't say it out loud.

"Be good while I'm gone. I'll be thinking of you every day," her voice had faded to a whisper now.

"Oh god now you really are going to cry on me."

Gwen laughed. "Good night Owen." She started to get out of the car. She leaned back in from the roadside. The snowflakes started to settle on her dark hair. "Happy Christmas."

As she walked up the path to the doorway and she heard the car's engine rev away Gwen felt a pang of emptiness. Her hand felt for the pendant around her neck and she smiled to herself as she unlocked the door to her home.

Owen watched her in his rear-view mirror as he turned the corner and saw the gesture. He smiled as she disappeared from view. He knew the situation was awkward, difficult, that it was tearing her apart, but he also knew that for a while he had made her happy. And she was coming back to him. For now it would have to do.

***

It'll be Lonely This Christmas

Jack sat back in his chair at the head of the conference room table and watched his team gather up their presents from earlier and leave for Christmas.

Gwen and Tosh seemed to be the most excited. Tosh was going to join her family, he knew, because she was taking a few days holidays. Gwen has been as schoolgirlie as Tosh about Christmas, especially when she'd been presented with Rhys' early present of a Caribbean holiday.

Jack had to give Gwen credit for creating a real atmosphere around the place this Christmas. He congratulated himself on recruiting someone who fitted in and worked so well with the team. But he frowned to himself thinking of the difficulties the New Year would bring her, wishing he didn't know.

He watched them walked down the stairs. This ‘thing' with her and Owen had been going on for a while now. He didn't want to know about it, didn't even mention it, but now he knew something neither of them did...

"Penny for your thoughts?" Ianto appeared beside Jack.

Jack smiled at him. "I guess I'm just reflecting on the season, Ianto," he said.

Ianto raised an eyebrow.

"Got any more of that eggnog?"

"For you, sir," Ianto inclined his head and went off, leaving Jack alone again.

He didn't feel mean for getting rid of him, he wanted to be alone with his thoughts for a bit.

Jack picked up the photo Gwen had we given him earlier and sighed as he felt a rush of emotion for the woman in the picture with him. They'd made a handsome couple. She'd made him laugh, always had. He had honestly loved Estelle and having to leave her had broken his heart. But he could never have told her the truth.

He was touched that Gwen had gone to so much trouble to get this for him. But he wouldn't keep it on his desk, not somewhere he could see it every day, he didn't want to be reminded of the rules and restrictions he had put on himself a long time ago. That relationships were just not a good idea when you had the life of a time agent. He had learned his lesson with Estelle. It was too hard to do it again. And now it was worse, now there was no way he could ever have that, not now, not the way he was...

Jack let himself feel miserable for only a few second before he physically shook himself and actually laughed aloud, but with a hint of bitterness, at his next thought: "thinking like that will do my reputation no good. Why would I want to limit my options?"

He took the photo and went back to his office, passing Gwen and Owen talking at Owen's desk. He didn't think they looked happy and it reminded him why keeping it fun was the only way.

He carefully put the photo into a bottom drawer in his desk, giving Estelle one last look.

"Here we go, sir," Ianto had found him. His reminder that he was limiting his options...and had long ago broken his ‘keep it fun' rule.

Ianto had brought a mug for himself too. He perched on Jack's desk, sipping from his mug and stretching out his legs beside Jack's chair.

He could sense Jack's troubled mood and was trying to think of something neutral to say when Jack sighed. It seemed he couldn't explain how he felt to himself, never mind to Ianto. He wanted to be alone... to think about the people he missed, that he probably wouldn't see again. Christmas made him morose.

But he also had a longing in his gut to grab Ianto and fuck him right there on his desk. Forget the dark thoughts clouding his mind and lose himself in something, someone.

Ianto was still looking a little ruffled from earlier. Not obviously but Jack knew him so well he could see Ianto's tie was a little askew, his hair a little ruffled.

"What are you looking at, sir?" Ianto noticed him staring.

"You," Jack was blunt. He gave Ianto an intense look that couldn't be misinterpreted.

Jack raised his hand slightly, from his side, and rested it on Ianto's leg, slowly stroking his thumb on the material of Ianto's expensive suit.

Their eyes were locked as Jack slid his hand up Ianto's leg.

He sucked in a breath as Jack's hand reached his trouser zip.

"Gwen," Owen's shout outside in the Hub made Jack snap back into his chair.

Ianto smirked. "An audience.... That would have been new."

Jack raised an eyebrow but he was distracted by Gwen and Owen.

"Is something wrong?" Ianto asked, following his frowning gaze.

Jack considered for a moment before decide to tell Ianto.

"I had a call from Rhys."

"Gwen's Rhys?" Ianto was surprised.

"He used her phone one evening, called me to arrange her surprise holiday, to get her time off," Jack said in a weary voice. "But he kept talking and told me he is going to ask her to marry him on this vacation." He sighed.

"Ah..." Ianto understood. He looked out across the Hub. Gwen and Owen had disappeared by now, without a goodbye. He didn't need to guess where.

"Never get involved with someone, Ianto," Jack said strongly, pushing himself out of his chair, and starting to pace his office. His dark mood from earlier came back in earnest.

"Those two are looking at nothing but trouble," he was talking about Gwen and Owen. "You know, Ianto, if you take my advice never fall in love," he sounded bitter now. "Men and women just cause each other hurt and pain. Love is a stupid, poetic notion for teenagers and cheap novels. No, Ianto, if you're wise you'll take what you want, when you want it and don't waste your life on someone."

Ianto was quiet. "Yes, sir," he muttered.

Jack paced a bit more before throwing himself back into his chair. He was tired and worn out. And now he was wound up as well.

Ianto swirled the dregs of his mug of eggnog, looking down into the cup.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Nothing, sir."

"Don't give me that," Jack spat out, annoyed. Ianto looked up at him and looked sad.

"Is that how you really feel, Jack? Getting involved with someone is nothing but trouble?"

And realisation of why Ianto was suddenly upset dawned on Jack. His expression softened and he reached for Ianto.

Ianto shrugged him off and walked away.

"Ianto, don't be like this, I didn't mean it like that, I didn't mean you," Jack followed him out of the office.

"Well it explains why you won't come to dinner with me tomorrow," Ianto spun round and said coldly.

"Ianto...." Jack said gently, "You know me, don't ask me to be something I'm not."

"I don't know what you are Jack. I don't understand. What do you want from me? Just someone to wait on you, bring you coffee, be here if you feel like a fuck?

"You disapprove of what's going on with Gwen and Owen, but at least they aren't alone tonight Jack." Ianto's face was contorted with his growing rage.

"You don't have to be alone...."

"It's not about me, it's you Jack, you... you let me start to get close to you then you push me away again. What do you want from me Jack? If it's just the odd fuck when you're lonely then tell me that, but don't pretend I have the problem here... that I am expecting something too much from you. I care about you. Don't you care at all?" The words rushed out.

Jack was stunned by Ianto's outburst. He wasn't the only one. Ianto looked shocked that he had said so much.

Jack knew he had broken his own rules with Ianto. But he wasn't about to admit it. He couldn't. It was his last line of defence. If he didn't admit how he felt they would both be better off.

Still he searched for something to say that would calm the man standing in front of him. He felt a chill as he stared at Ianto and saw the hurt and anger in his eyes.

Before he could say anything Ianto had turned and was marching towards the exit.

Jack felt a sinking feeling. This was not good. He didn't want Ianto to leave like this.

"Ianto, wait."

The Welshman spun around so quickly Jack almost ran into him.

"No you wait Jack," he spat out. "I've had enough. You just keep taking and never give anything back. Well I'm not doing it anymore. I'm sick of it. Of this place, of you, of your stupid games with me," he pulled a set of keys out of his pocket and thrust it into Jack's hand. "You lock up, I quit."

And he turned and went out the door, leaving Jack in a stunned silence.


******


Ianto was so worked up he was half way across the Millennium Plaza before he realised he had stormed out into the snowstorm without his coat. It was freezing, windy, and the melting snow was wet on his skin, on his shirt.

He was angry. Angrier than he felt in a long time... since Lisa. The memory made him even angrier at Jack. He felt stupid. That he'd let himself be used by Jack. He had always knows they would never be ‘partners' or any kind of established pairing, but he thought that at least he had meant something to the man that was his boss.

But what Jack had said, about keeping people at a distance, not getting involved, not caring, using them.....

Ianto felt so hurt by the words he's heard Jack speak that he felt physically hurt. There was a churning in his stomach, from anger or pain he didn't know, but he felt like he just wanted to hide somewhere dark, where the hurt couldn't find him.

By the time Ianto reached his home he was soaked through, and freezing. He was also exhausted. He hadn't slowed his pace since he'd stormed out of the Hub. He half thought Jack might follow him, and he was in no mood for more excuses or explanations.

As he wrenched off his wet suit and flung it on the floor of his bedroom, Ianto tried to ignore the small pile of perfectly wrapped gifts he had ready to bring to his family dinner the next day. There was one there for Jack too. He hadn't brought it to work today because of the planned Secret Santa. He'd bargained on having time alone with Jack, tonight or tomorrow. He'd hoped he could make Jack change his mind about Christmas day. He asked him every year to join his family. He never accepted, but this year he had hoped it would be different. After all, this year their relationship was different.

Ianto tossed and turned in his bed for a long time. Too angry too sleep. Preferring anger to any other emotion that might overtake him. But it was no good. He couldn't stop the angry tears when they started. The pain of thinking what Jack really thought of him coursed through him, breaking out in a loud sob he tried to muffle with his pillow. There was no one to hear him, but he didn't want to hear himself.

The tears burned his eyes and his head thumped in pain from crying before Ianto finally fell asleep. Probably about the same time Owen was driving home and Gwen was sneaking into bed beside Rhys.

******

Jack didn't sleep at all.

He felt bad. No, it was worse than bad. Bad was how he'd felt earlier in the night, when he was thinking of people he missed. Now he'd upset someone he didn't have to miss, someone who could be here with him right now if he hadn't been so thoughtless.

Jack had let Ianto go in his rage earlier. Following him had crossed his mind, but he figured they would only argue and say more hurtful things. He'd let him go to calm down. He hoped.

Now, after a few hours of pacing the Hub, trying to do some of the cleaning he normally left to Ianto, Jack was sitting at his desk, thinking. Drinking.

It was times like this, when he felt more emotion than he could deal with, that Jack wished he could sleep. Sleep had become his Mecca, the one thing he thought he would sell his soul for. If he had one.

He had the cctv feed coming through to his computer screen, watching the silent Millennium Plaza and the falling snow. It looked so peaceful out there, he thought.

Jack picked up the set of keys from his desk, the keys Ianto and thrown back at him. Turning them over in his hand he comforted himself with the thought Ianto's words were spoken in anger. He didn't mean them. He wouldn't quit. He couldn't quit. Quitting wasn't an option with Torchwood. But the look in his eyes...

What was that old phrase? ‘It's the quiet ones you have to watch,' Jack thought wryly. Well it sure applied to Ianto. He'd seen him angry before though. About Lisa. Maybe he shouldn't have been so surprised that Ianto would lash out at him now. It had been a very long day, they had all been tired. And it was Christmas. Just because he had been wrapped up in his own miserable thoughts didn't meant the others weren't feeling the same way.

Jack wondered if he'd missed something in Ianto's demeanour earlier in the day. It wouldn't be the first time, he thought sadly. He could do this job for a million years but he'd still be a flawed boss. He caught himself. It wasn't his skills as a boss that had started this. It was his... what... relationship skills? Is that what he had with Ianto? A relationship? What did that mean? Yes they spent almost every day together, yes they were spending a lot of nights together too. They had never talked about how they felt. It wasn't like that. At least he didn't think it was.

Jack sighed. He was getting nowhere thinking like this. He knew what he had to do.

******

Ianto had turned up on time for his family Christmas dinner. He'd been the doting uncle, the helpful son in the kitchen, the happy family member, eating, drinking, laughing along with the rubbish jokes from the Christmas crackers. But all the time there was a cold, heavy weight inside him.

He was just getting up from the television, having watched the Queen's Speech, when he heard his phone ring, deep inside his coat pocket. Instinct made him dash to answer the call, his instincts alert knowing a call on this day must be an emergency. It was only when he saw the name displayed on the screen he stopped and hesitated before pressing the answer button.

"What do you want, sir?"

"I'm outside." Was all he heard Jack's voice say before the call was ended.

Ianto considered ignoring him. Going back to the blazing fire and his sleepy family. But he knew Jack wouldn't take no for an answer. So putting on his coat he slipped out the front door.

It was a moment before he saw the Torchwood jeep a short way down the road. As he neared it the passenger door opened and he heard jack's voice. "Get in Ianto. I need to talk to you."

Ianto managed to get into the jeep and close the door without making any eye contact with Jack.

"I'm not going to mess you around. I'm sorry ok," Jack got straight to the point, blunt as ever. "I want you to take these back." He dropped the keys into Ianto's lap.".....Well say something," Jack was impatient.

"Do you think that by coming here, on Christmas day, and calling me away from my family I will be impressed?" Ianto's voice was low and serious. He still didn't look at Jack.

"I came here to apologise. I said I'm sorry." Jack stopped, hearing annoyance creep into his voice. He took a breath and went on. "What I said was dumb, ok. I did not mean to upset you. Now playing the sulky teenager doesn't suit you so snap out of it."

There was silence for a minute before Jack spoke again, this time in a softer voice. "Ianto..." he reached out and turned the younger man's face to look at him, "I do care about you."

And with that one short sentence Ianto felt a knot of pressure in his chest evaporate.

Jack felt Ianto relax and smiled. He caught Ianto's face in both his hands and planted a kiss on his lips. Ianto didn't resist, kissing him back, reaching out for Jack and snaking his arms around him.

After a moment Jack pulled away and smiled. "Come and see me later? We can make up," he gave Ianto a cheeky wink.

"We can talk," Ianto said.

Jack sighed. "Ok."

They regarded each other for a moment, neither sure what to say next.

"Get back to your family. They'll be wondering where you are," Jack said, leaning across Ianto to open his door.

"You could...." Ianto inclined his head towards the house.

"No Ianto." Jack shook his head, knowing that Ianto understood why.

Ianto gave him a week smile. "I'll see you later then."

He walked back toward the house feeling lighter than when he'd left it, only minutes before.

Jack watched him in his rear-view mirror and felt better, too. Yes he'd broken his own rules with Ianto. But there was no going back now.

***