Title: Dirty Little Secret
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Owen Harper
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Rating: R
Table: prompt_palooza
Prompt: 42, Secret
Author's Note: Continuation of Danger Zone.
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Owen Harper, unfortunately. Please do not sue.

***

Owen sighed as he sat by the Doctor's bed, looking over at the sleeping Time Lord. He'd gotten the Doctor back to the Tardis after the disastrous encounter with the Master, and insisted that the Doctor rest after they'd gotten off that planet.

He didn't know that much about the physiology of a Time Lord body, but the Doctor had told him enough for him to know that the other man was more physically resilient than a human. Still, he wanted the Time Lord to take time to recuperate from what he'd been through.

A fat lot of good he'd been to the Doctor, the first time he'd been called upon to really earn his place with the other man, he told himself bitterly. No matter what the Time Lord said, he couldn't help but feel that he'd been bloody useless.

Oh, all right, he'd managed to get the Doctor out of there, thank goodness. But that wasn't the point. He should have been able to watch the other man's back, to be sure that the Master wouldn't be able to get to him in the way that he had.

He hadn't done a damned thing, really, until it came to finding the Doctor and getting him out of the predicament he'd been in. Then he'd actually been able to redeem himself a bit -- but he'd still been ashamed of how he'd felt when all that was happening.

He'd kept quiet about his feelings; he knew that it wasn't the time to say anything to the Doctor. It wasn't the time to bring those feelings to light, not when he was more than a little shocked by them himself -- and when he didn't really want them known.

How could he tell the Doctor that he'd actually felt aroused by seeing him tied up the way he had been? He'd been horrified, yes, but at the same time, there'd been something incredibly sexy about seeing the Doctor bound and helpless.

Owen hated himself for feeling that way; it was the first time that he could remember feeling ashamed of a sexual urge. He'd always accepted those feelings as natural, a part of who he was; he'd never thought that he'd feel his particular kinks were wrong.

After all, he didn't hurt anyone, did he? Not unless they asked to be hurt -- and it had been a very long time since he'd been into that kind of scene. He'd never deliberately cause a person pain if they were unwilling to experiment with it.

And yet .... a part of him had been getting off at the idea of the Doctor being so helpless. He hated that; he wanted to hide from it, wanted to push the idea away from himself and deny that he'd gotten hard from looking at the Time Lord when he'd entered that room.

They hadn't slept together yet. They hadn't become lovers. He was nothing to the Doctor but a good friend, a companion -- even though he wanted to be so much more, and he was almost sure that the Doctor wanted that, too.

But here he was, having fantasies about what he could do to the Doctor when the other man had obviously been suffering -- and could have possibly done a good deal of physical damage to himself if Owen hadn't gotten there when he did.

Even now, he was hard just thinking about how the Doctor had looked, how he'd been bound and bent over .... the thought of taking the other man in that position had taken a firm hold on his mind; the mental image wouldn't go away.

Owen almost groaned aloud as he ran one hand over his face, blinking. He had to stop this. He couldn't keep thinking of the Doctor in this way, not if he wanted to keep his sanity. His dirty little secret would have to stay just that -- a secret.

"It isn't a secret, Owen."

He looked up with a gasp; the Doctor was looking over at him, pale and wan, but awake. One slender hand was on top of the covers, stretched out towards him as though the Time Lord wanted Owen to take his hand -- or to move from the chair to the bed.

After a moment's hesitation, Owen got up from the chair by the bed, moving to sit down next to the Doctor and taking the other man's hand in his. He wasn't sure what to say -- or how the Doctor had known what he was thinking. That was more than a little disconcerting.

"I'm a telepath, Owen." The words were soft, gentle. "I don't go probing into people's minds if they don't invite me to -- but your mind was practically screaming what you were feeling, and I don't want you to feel that it's wrong."

Owen shook his head, swallowing hard. "It is wrong," he said in a low voice, unconsciously bending the Doctor's long, slender fingers and curling his own around them. "It was wrong of me to be so turned on by seeing you like that. I hate myself for it."

"Don't." The Time Lord's voice was still gentle, but the tone was stronger now. "It doesn't mean that you want to see me hurt, Owen. I know that. If you did, you wouldn't have gotten me untied and out of there as quickly as you did."

"It's not that I liked seeing you hurt -- or knowing what could have happened to you if I didn't get you untied," Owen whispered, not meeting the Doctor's eyes. "It's that I liked seeing you bound like that -- and that I couldn't help thinking I'd like to have you at my mercy."

"I think I'd quite like that, too -- but under different circumstances," the Doctor whispered, lifting one hand to place it on Owen's cheek. "You surely can't think that the attraction is one-sided, Owen. I've wanted you since .... well, since we were on New Earth."

Owen blinked again, feeling as if he'd been hit in the head with the proverbial ton of bricks. What was the Doctor saying? This man wanted him? Why hadn't he seen this coming? He was usually on the lookout for this kind of chance.

Usually. But he'd changed in the time that he'd been with the Doctor; he'd been brought back to life, and maybe he'd left some of what he was behind him with his old life. Hopefully, he'd left most of the worst parts of himself and taken the good ones with him.

"If you're saying what I think you're saying -- then the feeling has been mutual since New Earth," he said, taking a deep breath. "I didn't want to say anything because I wasn't sure of how you felt. And it wasn't exactly the best time for me to bring up a subject like that."

"Of course not. You'd just been brought back to life." The Doctor shook his head, smiling a little. "But it was bound to come up sometime, Owen. A secret like that can't be kept for long -- especially when both of the people concerned are feeling the same way."

He nodded, feeling relief flood over him. Maybe he hadn't been so wrong to feel the way he did -- even though he would still wrestle with his conscience over that. At least the Doctor understood -- and what was more important, he returned those feelings.

Owen slid closer to the Doctor, wanting to take the other man in his arms but not quite daring to do so. What would he say to that? Would he pull away, protest that it was too soon? Or would his embrace be welcomed?

There was nothing for it but to jump right in, he decided, sliding his arms around the Doctor and pulling the other man close against him. If the Time Lord moved away, then he'd know that it was too soon, and he'd have something else to castigate himself for.

To his relief, the Doctor didn't seem to mind the embrace at all, settling comfortably into his arms. He raised a hand to stroke it through the Time Lord's hair, laying back against the pillows and trying to calm his racing heart.

"I'll try not to keep any more secrets from you," he told the Doctor, looking down at the other man. The Time Lord's head was resting against his shoulder, and he seemed perfectly comfortable in Owen's arms. "Though it's hard to hide them."

"It's impossible to keep secrets when your mind is screaming them out," the Doctor agreed, a slight smile curving his lips. "But I'm not going to intrude into your thoughts, Owen. That is -- unless you want me to know what's there without having to say anything about it."

"Oh, I think I'm fairly good at showing you what's on my mind," Owen told him, an answering smile on his lips as he bent to brush his mouth against the Doctor's. "I might not be up to full capacity yet, but I will be soon. And then you'll discover more about me than you might have wanted to know."

"I'm looking forward to that time," the Doctor murmured as Owen tilted his head back to kiss him more eagerly, his arms sliding around the young man's neck and pulling his head down as they both let themselves spiral into another world.

***