Previous part of Heart and Soul.

***

Chapter Ten.

Ianto walked around the edge of the ditch. The ditch surrounded the circle that encompassed the main area of the Standing Stones. This is not true henge he said to himself recalling what he had read over the previous weeks.

'You look puzzled", Jack said as he joined him.

"I was thinking this is not a true henge", he said following further along the edge.

"Explain", Jack requested as he kept pace with Ianto.

"Well henges have either a circular ditch or a raised ramp of earth approx 65 feet across with two, three or four entrances. This one has a circular raised ramp of earth around the outside, and a very deep ditch that runs around the inside of that" he paused

"Best guess is they dug out the ditch forming the ramp", he said thinking out loud, "it has four entrances which form a cross and meets dead centre", he stopped to take a look around and catch his breath as he came to one of the entrances.

"Then there are the stones", he said as he pointed at the arrangement of stones which appeared to follow a pattern of larger stones approx 1 meter high, with a smaller stones in between each larger stone which ran around the inside of the main arena. Even with a number of stones missing the pattern was evident.

*********** (ramp)

************(ditch)

************edge)

X X X (stones)

x x x

x

"And to deepen the mystery are those", he now pointed across at three massive stones which stood in a straight line along the north entrance, "and those," he said swinging his arm to now point at three massive stones to the south.

X X X

entrance

"Maybe they once went all the way around and were capped with top stones, like Stone Henge", Jack commented recalling Ianto's report and the hours of reading he had spent over the past weeks.

"Not flat enough", Ianto said as he indicated the pointed top of each.

"And X marks the spot", Jack said as he walked away and moved into the centre of the circle.

Ianto took a photograph of the centre of the circle now highlighted as Jack stood in the middle.

"X marks the spot", Ianto said as he joined Jack.

"How old you do think this circle is", Jack asked as Ianto joined him.

"There is no exact date", Ianto said as he took more photographs, "these types of structures started appearing all over northern Europe approximately 5000 years ago".

"It's impressive just to think of how much work was involved in doing this", Jack commented as he looked around and took in the whole site, "the logistics must have been enormous".

"Just imagine trying to move one of those", Ianto said pointing at one of the massive stones which stood just behind the north and south entrances.

"I would be interested to find out where the stones came from", Jack asked "if they were local or came from further afield, we should see if they came from a local quarry", he added as he watched Ianto move away to stand near the three north stones.

"If the biggest stones went all the way around I wonder where they went", Ianto said as Jack joined him.

" You mean, used locally", Jack said after a few moments.

"Something that big might have been used as a foundational stone, for something like a church for example", Ianto added.

"Possibly, I wonder if other groups of standing stone sites have been pilfered, sorry commandeered, for local building materials" , Jack said thinking out loud.

"Well we should defiantly come back soon", Ianto said taking a close up of each stone

"and stay longer, bring a theodolite and map the position of each stone see if any other site shares any similarities".

"Agreed we need to come back", Jack said looking at his watch and saw it was nearly one pm , "let's have some lunch".

"Thanks", Jack said as he took the lunch box Ianto handed to him. He had planned to take his assistant out for lunch. However, when he had picked him up at his apartment , it was clear from the large bag Ianto had with him he had prepared everything needed for a picnic lunch including the tartan travel rug they were both now sitting on.

He opened the box, and took out a sandwich and checked the filling. He looked at Ianto who was opening his own lunch box. He shook his head trying not to smile.

Ianto caught his grin. "I've done it again haven't I" he said as he took a bite of his own sandwich.

"Yep", Jack said his mouth full.

"You know I am sure you're having me on" ,Ianto said in all seriousness.

"Chicken and avocado, my favourite", Jack said as he chewed, "and delicious".

Ianto opened one of two flasks and poured a coffee from the first flask then handed it to Jack.

Jack took the cup then leaned back enjoying being outside in the sunshine. This part of the country was not renowned for its fine weather and nice days like this were too good not to enjoy, he glanced at Ianto – the view was marvellous.

"It's stunning around here", Jack said taking a drink from his cup.

Ianto nodded, "I've always liked it", he said in agreement.

"Have you lived up here a long time", Jack asked taking another bite of his sandwich.

"I moved up here September last year" ,Ianto replied as he now poured a coffee for himself from the second flask,.

"It's beautiful, I can see part of the attraction", Jack added after a few moments.

"That's one of the reasons", he replied leaning back and taking in the view. 'My girlfriend and I spent a holiday up here a while back and we sort of fell in love with the place", Ianto added

"I've often thought of coming up here myself , doing a tour", Jack commented in an attempt to keep the conversation going.

"We were camping, must of rained almost every day", Ianto said a faint smile on his face.

"Does she work at the University", Jack asked openly knowing it was a loaded question.

"No I came up here on my own", he replied as he looked at Jack. After some consideration he opened his wallet and took out a small photograph and handed it to Jack.

Jack brushed any crumbs from his fingers and took the photo it was Lisa smiling, "This is Lisa", Ianto said matter of factly, "she died a year ago….cancer".

'Ianto I am sorry", Jack commented now sitting up as he handed the photo back.

"I couldn't stand London any more…. too many reminders" , Ianto continued placing the photograph carefully back into his wallet, "when I saw the job in the journal section I thought….." he paused as he looked into the distance.

"We had a camping holiday up here, the one with all the rain, the summer before she became ill, she loved it so much…. we often talked about moving up here, starting a family…" he stopped mid sentence.

"What must you think of me", he said as he looked at Jack realising he had shared more that he had intended ,"you ask me a question and I start giving you my whole life history".

"How did you meet", Jack asked hoping that by asking for more information he could ease his embarrassment.

"We worked together for a drug company Opus Pharmaceuticals. She worked in one of the research labs, I worked in the technical library, she kept coming down hanging about lunch times ….." he smiled and looked out across the henge to the hills in the distance keeping whatever he was going to say to himself.

"I know this is going to sound strange ", Ianto said after several moments had passed,

"I sometimes wish Rosemary's idea's about reincarnation were true".

"Oh", Jack commented as he worked through the information Ianto had shared.

"Wouldn't it be amazing if you could meet up with loved ones in some future place and time, have a whole new life…. ", he said wistfully.

"Yeah" , Jack managed to say catching his breath at the comment as he looked at Ianto, and take them in your arms and tell you how much you love them and promise you will never let them feel neglected or invisible again.

Both of them now looked into the distance taking an occasional sip from their cups as they kept their thoughts to themselves.

Ianto stood up and brushed the crumbs off himself, then looked at this watch,

" It's getting on so I'll pack this lot away and then I thought I would take another walk around and take some more pictures".

"I'll join you", Jack said as he got up and stretched. He then bent down and took up the rug before he shook it out and folded it up and followed after.

Ianto packed the car making sure nothing would roll around. What had possessed him to tell Jack about Lisa he berated himself. It was not like him to open up like this, he hated telling people about what had happened to Lisa. He kept it to himself because he hated the pity in people's eyes when he did. They treated him differently afterwards – like he was going to break or something. He had not meant to say anything, but he had seen something on Jacks face ,when he had been talking, a look that suggested he had lost someone, someone significant and he would understand.

Jack sat down at his desk and stretched, it had been a long day and was not over for him.

Gwen was right the logistics of running Torchwood this far away were daunting and he had several hours of conference calls to be completed tonight.

He looked at his watch another hour before the link up. He yawned he could really use a cup of Ianto's coffee about now, he thought as he took a sip of his own brew. At least it was hot and strong and sighing he wondered how many cups he would need tonight.

He picked up the camera, it had been an interesting day. It was their first field trip and he had been given an insight into Ianto's new memory matrix. He turned the camera on and began to scroll through the photographs.

He sat back and smiled as he looked at the content at each photograph. Ianto had been very through as he had come to expect, no aspect had been missed with great attention to detail. However a casual observer might question the subject of each picture.

There were photographs of the henge, stones, the ramp, ditch, and how each stood in relation to the other, but they all had one other thing in common. He was sure Ianto was completely un aware of what he had done because every photograph had Jack in it somewhere. He continued to flick through and several more caught his attention, he raised his eyebrows, some very interesting photographs indeed.

He sat back and pulled his lip thinking, he knew instinctively it would be better for Ianto if he uploaded the photographs himself. If they were deliberate then that was one thing, but he was pretty sure they were not. If not then taking them had been a subconscious act. He was pretty sure Ianto would never have handed him back the camera if he was totally aware of the content

This was difficult he thought should he wipe the photographs from the cameras memory, he reached forward but stopped himself. They should remain he decided, when Ianto came to look at them he would have to question why he has taken them, he would have to examine his motivation. He then turned off the camera and placed it on Ianto's desk.

***

Ianto stood and took the young woman's hand giving it a firm shake.

"This is Toshiko Sato", Jack said as he introduced her to Ianto.

"This is Ianto Jones my research assistant", He said introducing him to her.

"Toshiko is here today to finally set up the server link I told you about", Jack added.

Ianto let go of her hand, "Jack told me you were coming", he said taking a step back from her , turned and picked up a pad of notes that were on his desk.

"I'll just get out of your way then", he said as he raised his eyebrows looking at Jack, "I'm going to library to see if I can find if an aerial survey was ever done of the local area".

"Ok we'll meet back here later and go for lunch, be back around 12.30 pm", Jack said as he saw Ianto smile hesitantly and nod in reply.

As Ianto left Jack shut the door, "It is so good to see you", Tosh said as she threw her arms around him.

"Good to see you", Jack replied embracing her.

"How is Ianto doing", she asked as she broke the hug and went to sit down in the chair in front of Jacks desk.

"He's doing Ok", Jack nodded as he answered now sitting on the edge of his desk, "You know Ianto he always gives one hundred and ten percent".

"Really he's doing ok?", she asked as if she didn't quite believe his reply ,"I have been so worried about him", she paused looking at Ianto's desk, "You know I have never forgiven myself for not being able to stop all this", she added sadly.

"Tosh this wasn't your fault", Jack said surprised she blamed herself.

"If only I had known", she took a breath, "he kept so much to himself ", she paused and looked up at Jack, "you know he never shared any part of his relationship with you, with any of us," she halted, "we knew you and he might be …... we suspected, Owen was very crude about it…but none of us really knew".

"I know", Jack said quietly realising this was difficult for Tosh to share.

"And today he looked at me like I was a complete stranger", Tosh said tears filling her eyes.

"I understand, all those memories all those times, you shared are gone", he replied sadly reflecting her thoughts

"Has there been any progress", she asked after a few moments as she composed herself.

"Slowly, very slowly" he said as he looked at the closed door, "Its one day at a time, but just lately, there have been some indications that Ianto has retained some kind of memory".

"Really!" Tosh said in surprise, "actual memories?"

Jack shook his head, "No more like impressions, shadows, feelings, sensations perhaps", he tried to explain.

"What do you mean", Tosh asked not sure she understood.

"I'm not completely sure myself", Jack added after a few moments, "there's been times when just for a moment…. there is this look on his face", he stopped as he recollected the times he had caught Ianto looking at him.

" He calls it deja vu", He said smiling gently.

"Deja vu", Tosh repeated intrigued.

"He has this feeling he knows me from somewhere but can't quite work it out ", Jack tried to explain.

"Have you found how he rebuilt his memories yet ", she asked the question they were all wanted to know.

Jack shook his head, " No, but I did find out that Lisa died of cancer", he told her, "and he moved up here because they had a holiday camping up here one summer".

"That is interesting", she commented, "cancer in this case being a metaphor for the conversion taking over her body and destroying the healthy parts and replacing them with cancerous cells".

'Yeah", he said, "got that one figured".

"You have to admit it's very clever", she added.

"His intelligence has never been in doubt", Jack said , as Tosh now stood and opened her lap top. She indicated Jack should move so she could get past him and start work on his computer.

"You know Ianto is such a private person there is probably a lot more going on than he would ever let you suspect" , she said as she started to type.

"Yeah", Jack said thinking about the photographs and Ianto's uncanny ability to anticipate Jacks needs. He smiled as he recalled that every day, at exactly the right moment he needed coffee, there was Ianto handing him a mug.

"I'm sorry this has taken so long Jack", Tosh said as she worked, "but we have been very busy, with requests from UNIT".

"I read the reports, I was sorry to miss Martha Jones", Jack added.

"She said to say hello", Tosh added as she pulled out a flash drive.

"Oh I need to warn you", she added not looking up from her task, "you know how John Hart your … caused an incident earlier this year well", she took a breath ," he's been trying to find out where you are… if he does he might try to come and see you up here".

"What" .Jack exclaimed standing bolt upright.

"He called in", Tosh said keeping her eyes firmly on the screen in front of her in an effort not to catch Jacks gaze, "Well when I say called in, we found him waiting for us last Tuesday morning down loading information from the sever".

"How did he get in", Jack asked raising his eyebrows as he saw deep red flush across her face.

"I'd rather not talk about, I'm rather embarrassed if you want to know" , Tosh replied.

"You didn't", he exclaimed leaning forwards.

"Does he know where I am", Jack asked after a few moments had passed seeing Tosh was not going to reply.

She took a breath, "Gwen wouldn't tell him and he won't get anything out of me" Tosh corrected herself , "us…. you know what I mean".

She looked up from her task to see Jack trying very hard to keep the amusement he felt from showing on his face.

"He's a bit miffed he can't track you via your wrist strap", she advised nodding towards the leather strap on his wrist.

"I've turned it to non response mode", he replied standing then walking around his desk to watch her work.

"That's why he's been hanging around giving us the third degree", Tosh replied continuing to type.

"Us" Jack retorted.

"Jack leave it", she stated sternly looking up at him, "I've already had to endure enough from Owen and Gwen", she took a sharp breath, "especially Owen".

"Did he say why he was looking for me" ,Jack asked as Tosh continued to work.

'Said he had some news, apparently he's had found someone", she said as she pulled out the flash drive, stood up and moved across to Ianto's desk.

"That's all he said", Jack asked curiously as he now sat back down at his desk.

Tosh placed the flash drive into a portal at Ianto's computer, "Anyway", Tosh warned 'Better beware", as Jack sat back in deep thought.

Several moments passed as she worked away typing, "Has he found out about your coffee making skills yet", Tosh asked not looking up.

"Never lets me near", Jack said leaning back and putting his hands behind his head

"Well that something positive" she said as she concentrated. "If he has retained that survival instinct, then there is hope".

Ianto stood behind the front desk of the Journal section setting up a computer search for any aerial surveys over past 20 years for the Standing Stone or any of the surrounding district. He was intent on setting up visual reference to place the stones within the landscape.

"It's great to see you", Rosemary said as she joined him, "I've seen you in and out but it's been a while since you came and said hello"

"We've been busy" ,Ianto replied, "I've been busy" he corrected himself,

"and I know how busy you …"

Ianto looked up as Mary passed by carrying several journal caddies.

"How's the lovely Captain", Mary said giving him a wink.

"He's good" Ianto said shifting uncomfortably trying not to add anything to the tone of the conversation that would lead to what he knew was coming.

"Good, is that what you call it", she added, "You know anytime you want Ianto, I will trade places with you in a heartbeat".

"Me an' all", Sarah piped in as she entered pushing the library cart to the front desk area as she joined them, " you just let us know and Mary and I…"

"Yeah working with the Captain , you lucky sod", Mary interjected wistfully giving Ianto a nudge, "fancy being close enough to get a whiff of that aftershave of his", she added now nudging Sarah who nodded and raised her eyebrows up and down a few times.

"You know what Ianto, I had a lovely dream about him the other night", Sarah said after a few moments looking into distance.

Rosemary rolled her eyes as they continued.

"Did you indeed", Mary interjected "he must be dream cheating, cause the other.."

"Have you two got nothing better to do than harass Ianto," Rosemary interrupted them as she watched him begin to blush, "back to work the pair of you" she told them.

"Thanks", Ianto said gratefully as he watched Sarah and Mary move reluctantly back to their tasks.

She placed her hand on his shoulder, "any time", she said following after them.

Ianto took a deep breath and returned his attention back to computer as he waited to the search to complete. Dreams he had to admit they were strange, the other night he had dreamt he had been in warehouse trying to rescue a pterodactyl with nothing more than a bar of chocolate, dark chocolate if he recalled correctly.

He had a vague recollection Jack had been there as well, flying around ,hanging from one of its legs. He blushed and breathed out, that's right, Jack had fallen into his arms and they had rolled around the floor and almost ended up kissing each other. He felt a hot flush across his chest as he remembered how their lips had almost touched.

He took a deep breath, what he had once read, dreams were a mine of repression and or wish fulfilment'. What the hell did that mean he thought , that he wanted to kiss Jack, or have Jack kiss him. Maybe you just want some kind of adventure with a dinosaur he told himself, as long as Jack joined him it could be interesting…..his thoughts were interrupted as the computer completed its search and with a click of the mouse he sent the results to the printer

-@-

"What's your problem today" Jack asked as he and Ianto began to unpack the equipment out of the back of his car in an attempted to understand Ianto's sullen mood. He had been brooding ever since he had picked him up to come out to do the survey at the standing stones. It was their second field trip and he had been looking forward to coming back here. This time he had lunch plans that didn't include lunch boxes, but it was clear something was bothering his assistant.

"It's nothing", Ianto stated as took out and unfolded the tripod for the theodolite.

Jack looked at him surprised at his tone "Well sounds like something", he retorted.

Ianto held the tripod and began to extend each leg.

'You've hardly said a word since I picked you up", Jack added. "Is it something I've done or not done", he took a look at Ianto, "or something I could help with?"

"It's not you, I'm annoyed at myself", he explained looking up surprised Jack could think this was about him.

"Is there anything I can do to help then"? Jack repeated his offer, as he took out the case that held the theodolite.

Ianto let out an audible sigh, "I have lost something, something I thought I had put away very carefully, I was looking for it this morning and its gone", he explained angrily.

"That doesn't sound like you", Jack commented as he opened the case that contained the main piece of the equipment.

"It's not like me" he repeated Jacks statement, "and it was left to me because my grandfather knew I would take care of it properly", he handed the now extended tripod to Jack.

Ianto hesitated and closed his eyes for a second as he struggled to admit what had occurred he – took a breath, "It's my grandfathers stopwatch, I've misplaced….lost it", he said standing still.

Jack dropped the tripod at the significance of Ianto's statement hit him.

"Maybe, you put it somewhere safe", He said slowly his voice cracking as he bent down to retrieve the tripod.

"No I've looked, searched my whole bloody flat", he said anger and frustration evident in his voice, "It was the only thing ever left to me of any significance and I've lost it"

He now took the tripod from Jack and began to set it up ready to place the theodolite on top, "I can recall I put it somewhere very safe", he stopped and he closed his eyes in an effort to recall, "Nope" he declared, "can't remember".

"What…." Jack attempted to say but found it hard to speak and coughed to clear his voice,

"What was it like", he managed to ask.

"It was silver, antique, and very old fashioned", Ianto replied too caught up in his description to see the look of shock on Jacks face, "with a chunky knob on the top" he mimicked the action of pressing the button.

"When did you last have it", Jack asked cautiously as he finally got control of his voice as placed the theodolite on top of the tripod.

"That's the problem Jack I can't remember" he said tightening the large screw that held the theodolite to the tripod. "I can't bloody remember".

Jack tried as best he could to concentrate. They were making a detailed survey of the stones so they could precisely map them out, but he was having difficulty focusing.

He was not sure he was fully in control even now and it was four hours after they had arrived. His heart rate had gone down at least he thought. He resisted the urge to feel his pulse.

He saw that Ianto was now in position with the marked stripped pole and he looked down the eye piece noting all the figures in a small pocket book he was carrying with him. He looked and waved to Ianto who now moved into position by the next stone.

Tosh was right there was a lot more going on for Ianto than he realised – a lot more.

Ianto held the stripped pole moving backwards watched for Jack to indicate when to stop.

Where the hell could he have put it? He had racked his brains trying to remember, all he had was this vague recollection he had put it into a large grey cupboard. Problem was he had never owned a large grey cupboard and when he thought about it had never been in any place that might find the sort of cupboard he recalled. And why the hell would he put one of his most a treasured possessions in such a place, so the image must have come from one of those bloody dreams.

Those dreams he thought of the vivid images that had started to wake him, in the middle of the night for weeks now. It was like he was dreaming he had lived some other life and some of the them. He felt himself flush hot, at what had occurred only two days before when he had been awoken by a particularly erotic dream about Jack. Last time he had awoken like that he had been twelve. It was so embarrassing he's your boss for gods' sake he told himself.

He took a deep breath, it was only after that awakening that he had recalled his stop watch and began to look for it. How the two could be connected he couldn't fathom but he had to admit that the dream had included some incredibly innovative ways of using a stop watch which he was sure …

He brought himself back and saw Jack wave and he moved to the next stone. And secondly he would have to come back on his own and retake all those photographs; thank god he had been the one to check them. What the hell would Jack think if saw them? What the hell had been going on for him to have taken them in the first place? He was interrupted as dream images of himself with Jack flashed through his mind again and he bit his bottom lip in remembrance. He shook his head to clear his thoughts, concentrate on the task he told himself and watch for Jacks instruction to move.

He saw Jack waving frantically he moved backwards again and looked up briefly as he saw Jack now running towards him. He tried to make out what he was shouting, too late he felt something give way and his left foot slipped from under him and he fell backwards.

The ditch was steep and he rolled several times... He landed with a heavy thump on top of a partially exposed boulder. He struggled to breathe but found it impossible other than short staggered breaths.

He attempted to push himself up on to his knees but found it momentarily impossible. It was like his brain was sending instructions his body was refusing to obey. He opened his eyes now and found he was looking at grass and grey stone. He heard movement to his left and he tilted his head slightly and saw Jack sliding towards him fear written on every line of his face.

"Ianto" Jack shouted as he reached him. Ianto was face down, right arm twisted under him at the bottom of the ditch.

"I'm Ok", Ianto struggled to say but found himself unable to speak. He tried to get onto all fours but slumped back down again. He managed to pull his right arm from under him and brought his wrist into view, it looked very odd and for the moment he could not work out why.

"Ianto", Jack repeated as knelt down next to him and put his hand on his head, as he did Ianto attempted to move again.

"Don't move", he repeated emphasising each word as he saw Ianto struggle to rise.

"I'm fine" Ianto said as he found his voice and tried to shrug off Jacks hand.

"Trust me you're not fine", Jack said placing his hand on Ianto's shoulder in an effort to get him to hold him still.

He felt him try and move again, "Ianto keep still", he commanded using his most forceful voice.

Surprised more by Jacks tone than his request Ianto laid still as he felt Jack run his hands firmly over his body in order neck , chest, pelvis, back, down one leg then down the other leg

'Ahhhhhhh" Ianto cried out as Jack gently felt around his left knee he then ran his hands down to his left ankle "Ahhhhhhhh" Ianto repeated

"I'm going to take off your shoe on your left foot", he told Ianto ,"your ankle is very swollen and your shoe is restricting the blood flow I will try and be as gentle as possible"

Ianto gritted his teeth as he felt his foot being supported and his shoe eased off , even so he let out several grunts of pain.

"Does it hurt anywhere else", Jack asked kneeling by him side his hand on his back.

"Just my wrist, knee and ankle", he told him his voice filled with agony as he now rolled over and sat up with Jacks help.

"Well its clear your wrist is broken", Jack told him as he took off his great coat and placed it around his shoulders. Ianto looked at his wrist and now recognised why it looked so strange. Jack looked up the bank and then at Ianto as he pulled out his phone.

Ianto saw him and his eyes widened , "No please ,I can make it to the car", he pleaded his voice breaking up with pain.

Jack looked down at Ianto as he cradled his broken wrist, his face twisted in agony and pale as his white tee shirt, and his ankle tuning a deep blue.

"Ianto", Jack said as he breathed out in frustration.

"Please Jack," Ianto asked again as he saw a stubborn look cross Jacks face

Jack thought for a moment, "Alright I'll make a deal ,if you can stand up and walk one step, unassisted I won't call an ambulance", he offered.

Ianto put his left hand down, to give himself some leverage, now he put his uninjured right foot down and pushed up, but the movement jarred his wrist, he bit his lip in pain and sank back.

"Hand me the pole" he asked as he contemplated his second attempt.

Shaking his head Jack picked put the pole and put it Ianto's his good hand. He stood back as Ianto now used the pole for support. His second try was no better and he fell back defeated.

Jack pursed his lips then dialled 999 "I need an ambulance…"

***

Chapter 12

The young doctor placed the series of x-rays on the light panel.

"The good news is your left ankle is not broken, but you have twisted it very badly along with your left knee, there is some evidence of ligament damage so you will still need a cast ,your wrist is broken here, here and here" he pointed to each fracture evident on the film," and you have dislocated your thumb."

"How are you for pain", the doctor asked as now he turned and picked up the chart before glancing at his patient. The nurses had advised him he was being very stoic and if it were not for his friend who was overseeing every aspect of his care, he would not have agreed to any pain relief and it had only been after some persuasion the young man had agreed.

"Fine" Ianto croaked.

"If you need any more let the nurse know", he began writing on the chart, "you've only a minimal dose and your injury is significant". He looked to Ianto and then back to Jack.

'I've written he can have up to 5xxx per hour if required", he said to Jack as he put the chart back on the end of the bed.

"I'm arranging for a theatre now", he saw the look of consternation on his patients face

"Unfortunately a break this bad, where the nerves through the carpal tunnel have been compromised, it will need some delicate work to set it", he explained then smiled "trust me you are better off unconscious", he touched Ianto's good foot.

"How long do you think he'll need to stay", Jack asked thinking about what arrangements needed to be made.

The doctor looked first at his patient then at Jack " a break this severe will need a significant reduction, there will be substantial swelling, and he will need to stay at least 48 hrs, firstly because he is having an anaesthetic and secondly we need to monitor the swelling, we put on a cast which can be split if necessary.

"Thank you Dr Jacobs", Jack said as he put his hand on Ianto's good arm.

"I'll send the nurse in and get that cast on your leg'", he said "might as well get that done here".

Ianto lent backwards into the back rest and looked at the ceiling. , "I don't know what to say", he said trying to keep his focus. "all this bloody fuss caused because…"

"This was my fault I should have been paying more attention", Jack interrupted what he knew was going to be another apology, "I'm just glad you are OK" he said putting his hand on his good knee.

"I still reckon I could have got here on my own", Ianto said contritely looking at Jack.

'Right", Jack commented recalling how Ianto had required nitrous oxide, and morphine, for the pain. Then it had taken a good 20 minutes, with two ambulance men, Jack and a helpful tourist to get the stretcher out of the ditch and into the ambulance.

He saw Ianto was about to say something more but was interrupted as two nurses entered with all the equipment required to set a cast.

Jack sat beside the bed waiting for Ianto to regain consciousness, he would be more comfortable now his wrist was in a cast. He stood and kissed his forehead then ran the outside of his fingers down his face and under his chin, then put his hand on his cheek cradling his face.

Thank god he was not more seriously injured. He had been so deep in thought, it was not until too late he had seen how close to the edge of the ditch Ianto was. He had attempted to get his attention but Ianto thought he was asking him to move further backwards. He had been horrified as he watched Ianto lose his footing, flail then tumble over the edge.

He saw Ianto's eyes flutter and he took his hand away. He would have a heart attack later when he stop berating himself for being so stupid. He cursed himself, even with his best intentions Ianto was the one who ended up paying the price for his inattention.

Ianto opened his eyes. "How ya' feeling" Jack asked gently.

"Terrible", Ianto replied

-@-

"Well you have two choices" Jack said ". in a tone that left Ianto in no doubt of his intention, as they sat in his car outside Ianto's apartment building, "you either accept my help to get you back to your apartment, or I take you back to my place".

With his right wrist broken and left leg in a cast from the mid thigh down it was technically possible to use a single crutch, but right now Ianto was in no state to even contemplate such action. He was badly bruised because Jack he has seen them, and despite two days of bed rest all of Ianto's movements screamed how stiff and sore he was.

He watched Ianto's face as he struggled to accept his offer. He knew how fiercely independent Ianto was and knew he believed he could cope. Jack had done as little as necessary, but this was something Ianto had accept he could not do on his own. He reached over and took off his own seat belt and put his hands on the steering wheel looking forward as he waited.

As he heard the seat belt click, he opened his car door and got out. He then went around and opened the passenger door. Ianto reached up and held onto the handle above the door before swinging his left leg out. He then turned his whole body and swung his right foot out before he straightened up on his one good leg. He attempted to steady himself but toppled forward. Jack caught him and held on to him and then moved to his left side and took his weight. With slow awkward cautious hops they made their way to the apartment entrance.

Ianto leaned against the door frame of his apartment. Exhausted he felt like he had run a marathon, his breathing was heavy and fast. How he thought he could have made it on his own, he could not contemplate. However, he would rather have made it on his own then to let Jack see any more loss of dignity. All he wanted to do now was get inside and collapse, with any luck now he was home he could persuade Jack to leave.

He reached down and pulled out his keys from his trouser pocket and handed them to Jack. Opening the door Jack helped him over to the sofa. Ianto slumped into the seat. He closed his eyes as fatigue and discomfort began to overwhelm him. He opened them again to see an open hand with two pain pills and another hand holding out a mug of water

"It's been four hours", Jack said as he handed over the pills, followed by the mug.

"I'll be fine now, I just need a good sleep" Ianto said putting them into his mouth then taking a sip of water, swallowed then handed the mug back.

Jack smiled, "listen the choice is still yours", he advised him in all seriousness reminding him the conversation in the car.

Ianto looked up and saw the same stubbornness on Jacks face he had seen at the bottom of the ditch over the ambulance debate, he nodded perceptively, resigned he had to accept he needed help.

Jack turned off the light and turned around about to say goodnight but then realised Ianto was already asleep. Instead he closed the door with care making sure it made no noise.

Ianto had been dead on his feet, foot he told himself, he had not wanted to eat just get to bed. Jack had agreed, Ianto looked grey with fatigue having had no real sleep at the hospital.

He had not offered his assistance other than get him onto the bed then waited outside as he undressed. After several moments Ianto had called him back to help him get his tee shirt over his head as could hardly lift his arms above his shoulders

Jack had carefully eased the tee shirt off, and he noted several massive bruises had deepened from deep purple to black down his back and right side where he had glanced off several boulders on the way down the steep bank of the ditch.

Jack had cut along the seam the left leg of a pair of jeans he had brought for him to wear home ,which made them easier to remove and he did not require his help. Jack had exited the room before this and waited outside finally knocked and entered to check Ianto was Ok and saw he was already under his duvet and had his eyes closed.
-@-

Jack went into the kitchen and put the kettle on and he looked around for the first time.

This was a small compact apartment, the main living areas comprised of a small kitchen which flowed in a larger lounge. He was curious to see what Ianto had kept with him and from what he could see on the surface, the flat was in essence the essential Ianto.

He saw a familiar picture on the shelf of the book case and picked it up. It was Lisa and Ianto very much in love.

He heard the kettle boil and he put the picture back into place. He went back into the kitchen and began opening cupboards to find something to drink. He found one shelf full of air tight containers, he opened one and found it full of coffee beans he took a deep sniff of the rich aroma. He noted the label and placed it back then noticed this was one of several containers. If this was what Ianto used at home, he really must adore coffee. As much as Jack loved coffee even he only treated himself to something this exceptional on rare occasions. A sheet of paper caught his eye and he pulled it out and as he unfolded it he saw it had his name followed by a recipe for a blend of beans.

A growing realisation occurred to him why the coffee Ianto made for him at work might be so good, he calculated how many cups they got though in a day. He put lid back on and the containers back into place along with the folded sheet.

He opened another cupboard and found what he was looking for. He emptied the mug he had used earlier into the sink and put the tea bag he had found in and poured in hot water. He looked through several more cupboards trying to find something he could eat. He came across a half eaten packet of crackers and he shook out several into his hand.

As he realised how little food was in the kitchen he now opened the fridge, except for some milk it was empty. He picked it the carton and checked the use by date before he gave it a sniff and with a grimace poured it down the sink. He rinsed out the carton and then put it on the bench. He picked up the mug and with his fingers pinched the corner of tea bag lifted it out of the mug and dropped it into the sink.

This was not right, Ianto's flat kitchen in Cardiff had been an Aladdin's cave of ingredients, in fact he had to watch his waist line around Ianto. He smiled no one other than Jack knew of Ianto's delight in cooking up a storm and he had partaken of some memorable feasts.

He took a sip trying to recall what he had seen Ianto eat at the office. The odd sandwich he recalled, but mostly coffee, he put his foot on the bin peddle. If he was eating out then there may be a few fast food wrappers in the bin , the lid lifted ,it was empty except for a few empty cans of soda, he took his foot off the peddle and the top closed.

When the doctor had examined him he was shocked he could see his ribs and he had to admit Ianto looked and felt thin. He took another sip, he would make sure he kept an eye on how much he ate from now on, some more dinners out and maybe he could order in lunch for them each day he thought.

Another thought came to him, the last time he had been that thin was after Lisa had died, it had clear to all of them that he had stopped eating, and only appeared to drink coffee. Was this an indication he was grieving over his loss of Lisa? Then again perhaps this has nothing to do with Lisa; he looked toward the closed door, if nothing else it was an indication Ianto that for whatever reason he was not looking after himself.

He took the crackers and went into the lounge. It was very tidy, everything had a place and there was a place for everything. In the corner of the lounge was his DVD and CD collection along with his boxes of graphic novels and comic collection. From what he could tell Ianto had continued to grow all three with his usual enthusiasm. Although he noted all the new purchases were unopened and were still in their wrappings, there was quite a collection, many months worth he observed.

He now moved to the bookshelf and began to look though them to see what books he had taken with him when his eyes caught a substantial folder on the bottom shelf. He picked it up, it was heavy, he put it on the coffee table and turned it over.

On the front in large black letters was "READ", he opened it.

It was thick with several sections, each with a coloured divider.

On the front divider was another simple instruction.

"Start with the red section'

Following the instructions he turned the red divider over to the first page

On the page was a list of facts.

1: your name is Ianto Jones

2: your birthday is 19th August

3 you were born in 1983

4: you are 24 years old

5: The date today is Tuesday…

6: you are in a flat.

7: This is your flat, you live here.

8: The address is …..

After several hours he closed the folder and placed it back where he had found it.

It was one mystery solved. He had he always known that Ianto was smart but this document was a work of genius. Ianto had been able to reform his memories because he had left himself detailed information about every aspect of his life.

He had documented, catalogued, created, and fictionalised where required with great care his entire life using his real memories as template for his new ones. The cancer / cyber conversion being one example. If he had read it shortly after he had come to from the sedative effects of Retcon his new memory matrix would have formed as he had anticipated. He had created a brilliant work of fiction to start a new life. The motivation Jack was all too aware of, but if he wanted a new life, why did Ianto look so unhappy.

Jack took a deep breath Ianto didn't realise it yet but this accident had allowed an opening into his life not possible until this moment. The folder was not a complete guide to all of his new memories however it had given him insight into the memory matrix Ianto had created.

He looked at the door and a deep sense of longing filled him, all he wanted to do was just take him into his arms, hold him tell him how much he loved him. Sitting in that office so close to him every day and not being able to act was one the hardest things he had ever had to do. There were times he ached to reach out to him. But he knew he had to take this slowly, for Ianto's sake.

He took a deep breath he had always known winning Ianto back was going to be a long hard road, and in truth he had no grand plan worked out. What he did know was Ianto needed time and space to understand and re-develop his own wants and needs as far as Jack was concerned. All the signs were there that deep within Ianto something was stirring, he looked at the door again. If he was right Ianto was reconnecting with deeply buried emotions. He smiled to himself, and he was pretty sure from the revelation about the stop watch, what some of those might be. And if the past was a guide he knew Ianto was a man who once he knew what he wanted would act and act with determination and speed.

All Jack could do was be around, build his friendship and allow things to develop, trust Ianto and wait for the moment when Ianto would act on his feelings. What the moment was and when Jack had no idea all he could do was to be ready and waiting. All he could do in the mean time was hold on his own feelings and hope it would be sooner rather than later.

***

Chapter 13
Part Three - Affairs of the Heart

Note: All and any inconsistencies in Ianto's speech and thoughts are delberate.

Ianto woke and for just a second he forgot what had occurred until he tried to move. He was not sure what hurt more – breathing or moving. He was laying on his front, his right wrist encased in plaster up to his elbow which was up near his head. One leg felt like it was covered in slightly damp concrete and his other foot was tangled in his duvet. He moved his free foot around in an effort to untangle himself but found it was only making things worse. He stopped to consider his options.

He lay for several more moments when he felt an urgent need to move, he realised he was desperate to pee. He was just about to attempt the effort to untangle himself again when the door opened.

He turned his head and saw Jack enter, he looked rumpled and he realised he must have stayed the night. With a swift action he untangled the bedding as best he could and helped Ianto sit up. He then straightened the bedding up and tugged the duvet so his chest was covered.

He then left for a few moments and returned with some pain pills and a glass. Reaching forward Ianto took the pain pills and swallowed them with a sip of water not sure what to say he nodded his in thanks.

"If you need help, give me a shout," Jack said as he closed the door. Ianto lay back grateful he was back on his own as he didn't think he could handle Jack witnessing any more of his helplessness, not after the past few days.

After a few moments he struggled and swung himself out of bed, hopping across the space between the bed and the door frame he made it into the bathroom.

Jack listened as he heard him make it back into his bed waited a few move moments then opened the door. He saw Ianto had grabbed a tee shirt and was pulling it awkwardly over his head. He stood back, and then he placed banked pillows as Ianto settled back. With Ianto comfortable he left briefly, and retuned with a mug of coffee and handed it to him, "If I've got this right you like black, two sugars", he said.

Taking the offered mug he took a sip, "Jack thanks for this," he said sincerely.

Jack nodded in reply as he knew that this small thanks was a deeply felt appreciation of Jacks efforts.

He took another sip of coffee, and sniffed. He could swear he could smell cooking. His stomach rumbled as he realised he was hungry and he then tried to recall the last time had eaten anything. He had nothing in the flat to cook so he must be so hungry if he was imagining the smell of cooking.

His thoughts were interrupted as Jack now entered carrying a tray loaded with a plate filled with fried eggs, bacon, a sausage, mushrooms, black sausage, tomatoes , hash brown and toast and he struggled to sit up as best he could.

"Not sure what you would like," Jack lied knowing full well everything on the tray was everything Ianto loved for breakfast and placed it on the cover over his legs.

"This is amazing," Ianto said in appreciation of the feast in front of him as he picked up the knife and fork on the tray.

"I figured you hadn't eaten properly since the day before yesterday, so you must be famished", Jack said as he left taking the now empty coffee mug and leaving.

Ianto dove in to the breakfast with enthusiasm, and Jack was right he was hungry. It had been a long time since he had eaten a home cooked meal. Jack returned with two mugs and placed one back on the tray and smiled that his efforts were so appreciated.

Jack knew he was not the best cook in the world. In fact Ianto had once commented that after 140 years you would think Jack would have picked up something beyond the most basic skills. But the one thing he could cook to perfection was breakfast. Jack had enjoyed cooking breakfast for both of them whenever he had slept over and from the way Ianto attacked the food on his plate it was evident his gesture was very welcome

Ianto put his knife and fork down on his cleared plate and picked up the mug, as Jack removed the tray.

"That was brilliant," Ianto said as he took a sip of coffee as Jack stood looking at him.

"I am glad you enjoyed it," he said smiling as he stood in the door frame facing Ianto.

"Oh and when you are feeling better you and I will sitting down to review how we order in coffee supplies for the office," he turned and left Ianto to enjoy his coffee.

Ianto froze the mug suspended halfway to his mouth,"fuck," Ianto mouthed silently, as Jack headed back to the kitchen.

-@-

Jack watched as Ianto sat on the sofa his leg resting on the floor as he sorted through the pile of DVD's he had accumulated over the past months. He was in sweats, something Jack had to admit he had never seen Ianto wear, in fact until this morning had no idea he had even owned a pair. He was pleased to note that Ianto was now managing to move around using the one crutch. It had been several days now but despite this progress he was only capable of basic movement around his apartment, bed to couch to bathroom, back to couch.

His bruises were fading and he looked less uncomfortable. Jack hoped Ianto would be occupied enough while he left as he would take the opportunity to attend the Torchwood tasks that needed his attention.

"Ok," Jack said taking Ianto's choice and placing it in the DVD player. "Is there anything else you need before I go," he asked. Ianto looked up and smiled and shook his head "nope."

"I'll be back with lunch around 1 o clock," Jack said as he turned to check Ianto had everything he might need, "if you need me you can reach me on my cell phone," he added as put on his coat and headed for the door.

Ianto made himself comfortable, and attempted to watch the film he had chosen. This was without doubt one of the strangest weeks of his life. Against every argument he could muster Jack it seemed was on a mission and would brook no argument, he was staying around to help until Ianto was fully mobile.

He was not sure what to think of Jacks help. He had had to rely on his own resources for so long coping on his had become something he just got on with. Lisa had often berated him on his fierce independent nature. He had explained when you had no one for so long, you had to rely on yourself.

At first, he had resisted Jacks help hating to be molly coddled, but then realised Jack would not do for him anything he could do for himself. As he gained greater mobility Jack had stepped back and allowed him to do what he could, only stepping in if it was necessary, something Ianto was very grateful for.

He wondered at first why Jack was so intent on helping and he still found it hard to believe that Jack felt responsible for what had happened. He had pointed out he should have been paying more attention and now because his clumsiness he had lost his assistant. However Jack had made it abundantly clear Ianto was more than a work college, he was a friend. As a friend it was ok to offer help.

He rubbed the back of his neck as a deep sensation developed at the base of his skull, a friend, he had to admit he had never thought of Jack in those terms. Well true he liked Jack, there was something about him that made him so good to be around. That might explain all those dinners, he thought and why Jack consulted him on every decision or why he kept his company at weekends, and the thought developed, Jack thought of him as a friend.

Well to be honest, he thought it was just part of Jack's management style, a way of motivating him, treating him like an equal whose opinion actually mattered. It had not occurred to him until this very moment that Jack might like him. He felt a warm feeling grow and he smiled , when was the last time he had made a friend, someone who was not just a passing acquaintance, a real friend, a long time he told himself a very long time.

-@-

"You remember Toshiko?" Jack said as he entered Ianto's flat.

Ianto pointed the remote at the DVD player to place the movie he was watching on hold then looked up surprised at the visitor.

"Jack told me what happened so I asked if I could come and visit," she explained holding out her hand smiling, "to see how you are."

Ianto shook her hand smiled briefly, then indicted she sit down next to him on the sofa.

"Toshiko has come to bring us the survey I told you about", Jack said as he disappeared into the kitchen and began emptying the white paper bags filled with lunch he had bought, on to plates.

Tosh handed him several thick folders, "Jack said you were a bit bored and I was up here anyway and thought you might like to have look through," she said quickly.

"Thank you," Ianto replied taking the folders not quite sure how to react to Tosh. He had only met her once in the office weeks ago. He was surprised she remembered him at all and even more amazed Jack had spoken to her about him.

Jack came back into the room holding a mug and plate full of food which he handed over to Ianto.

Ianto put the folders on the floor, then took the plate and mug of coffee from Jack balancing the plate on his good knee.

"Jack told me you've had an accident, a pretty serious one by all accounts," Tosh commented indicating the cast on his wrist and leg, as Jack now handed her a plate of food.

"I've broke my wrist, " he lifted the cast for her to have a better look, "and I twisted my knee and ankle," he indicated to the cast on his leg.

"How did it happen," Tosh asked picking up the roll from her plate and taking a bite.

"We were out at the Standing Stones , the ones we've been investigating, I was over by the edge of the ditch and without looking I stepped back, lost my footing and next thing I had fallen in," he explained.

As he came back into the room with his own plate full of food, Jack shook his head as he heard Ianto put the blame on himself. "What actually happened was Ianto had his back to the edge. I was directing him to where he should be going. I didn't realise he was so close to the edge, and before I knew it he had slipped and fallen," Jack corrected him.

Ianto picked up the sandwich on his plate, "still reckon I could have got out of that ditch on my own," he said as he took a bite.

Ianto looked as Jack raised his eyes to the ceiling, followed by the stubborn look he had seen over the past week cross fleetingly over his face.

"How much longer do you need the casts for?" Tosh queried, silently amused as she observed the private moment that passed between them.

"Cast on the wrist another six weeks if I'm lucky, ten if I'm not," he replied, "and three weeks for the leg."

"Well I am very pleased to see you're alright," Tosh told him smiling. "Being stuck at home is no fun," she added "especially when you are involved in something so interesting".

Ianto nodded, "Yep stuck at home and bored," he agreed as he picked up the remote and turned off the DVD player with the remote.

"Well I was thinking about you being at home and thought you might find these useful," she leaned down opened her substantial hand bag and took out a roll of paper. She smoothed them out and handed him a number of articles.

Ianto took the articles and began to scan the titles. They were a collection of local legends and stories collected approximately 100 years ago some pertaining to the Standing Stones of Emin.

"Thank you Tosh," he replied using her nick name unwittingly.

Jack took a long drink from his mug, and looked across at the both of them relaxing into each others company. Tosh had wanted to come the day after the accident to check how Ianto was. He had argued Ianto would find it very strange someone he had met for less that 45 seconds would rush to his side. It had taken all of his powers of persuasion to get her to hold off until now.

Tosh had lost more than just a friend he realised when Ianto had wiped his memories. What depths of pain must Ianto have been in to want to forget his close friendship with her. He took a breath, he didn't need to wonder, he knew, it was laid out in black and white. He re-read Ianto's journal on a regular basis to remind himself what was at stake here and never to forget his own culpability. He only hoped he could make it up to both of them. Using this opening to renew her contact with Ianto he was aware she was eager to be more involved and wanted to visit more often. He wondered if Tosh had told Gwen yet. He smiled and wondered what Gwen would say as another Torchwood operative drifted up here, as he saw Tosh take out a permanent maker from her bag.

"Its traditional when someone is in a cast to write a message," she said indicating to the pen in her hand, as Ianto held out his arm. With a flourish Tosh began to write several Japanese symbols firmly on the cast.

"There all done," she said as she finished.

Ianto looked down to examine the message along the length of the cast.

"It says get well soon in Japanese, " she told him and smiled.

Ianto looked at the series of symbols and smiled in return.

"You look after yourself, " she said standing, " and I'll see you as soon as you are up and about. I'll be back and we can go out to the henge and set up those monitors," she said as prepared to leave.

"Thank you for all the articles," he said as she picked up her bag and walked across as Jack opened the door. "And the message," he called out.

"I'll walk you out." Jack said following her.

"What did you write on his cast," he asked suspiciously as they approached her car.

Tosh smiled looking a little smug, "let's just say, Ianto might find it interesting if he could read Japanese, " she said.

"Tosh what did you write," Jack repeated this time with an edge to his voice.

" It's a good luck message," she replied nonchalantly as she opened her car door.

"Toshiko," he said not convinced as she pulled the door closed , unwound the window and started her car.

"Toshiko," he repeated as she backed up and pulled up beside him.

"I wrote a note asking him to hurry up and remember because we all miss him," she explained then drove away.

As she did she looked back in the mirror to see Jack walking back into the building, "amongst a couple of other things, she said to herself smiling as she changed gear. " like how much you love him."

***

Chatper 14

Jack moved to turn on his computer as Ianto set about making their first batch of coffee for the day. They had fallen into coming in together since the accident. It had begun because Ianto couldn't walk the entire distance while his knee and ankle injury healed and Jack had started picking him up and driving him in. Now he could make the full distance they met outside Ianto's flat and walked in together. It was a morning ritual he knew they both enjoyed and the walk through the park-like surroundings of university made it a pleasant start to each day.

Using his password access he logged onto the Torchwood server. Normally he would never do this while Ianto was here but something was wrong.

He clicked onto the message server; nothing. He paused briefly then checked to ensure the link was functioning, according to the pop-up it was 100%. So if the link was up he should have received something. He set up a diagnostic programme just to double check. He watched as he waited for the programme to complete its scan. A beep advised him there were no issues. He took the hot mug of coffee from Ianto, took a sip and sat back.

Normally Gwen, Tosh and Owen forwarded him a substantial amount of reports, updates, notifications and personal messages daily, but there had been nothing for three days. Compounding this was his inability to raise any of them on his cell phone. He had left several messages, all of them unanswered. He sat back pulling his lip and looked across at Ianto as he now sat at his desk organising the journals he had been engaged with. He made a difficult decision, leaning forward he turned his computer off.

"Ianto," he said, "I have to leave." Ianto looked up. "Something important has come up which I need to deal with."

Ianto looked across at Jack in complete surprise. This was the first time Jack had indicated he was involved in anything outside of the four walls of this office, the university, surrounding countryside or this project.

"How long for?" He stammered, not sure how he should take the news.

"Three days," Jack said looking at the concern on Ianto's face. "One day there, sort things out, one day back," he said thinking out loud then added, "five tops." He stood up and walked across to Ianto's desk and put his hand on his shoulder.

"Is there anything I can help with?" Ianto asked hoping this could be an opportunity to repay Jack's kindness over the past weeks.

"No," Jack replied shaking his head, "unfortunately, I need to check this out myself."

He pulled out a set of keys from his pocket and began to manoeuvre one of keys off the ring. "I had this cut for you in case you ever needed to get into my flat," he said as he saw the surprise on Ianto's face. "It was in case if I wasn't around and you needed to check something," he explained quickly.

Ianto stood up and took the key. "You have my cell phone number, you can call me on that number, or text me, anytime." He paused to look at Ianto directly, "I will leave my phone on at all times." He took a breath, "I'll call you tonight after I arrive, just to let you know I 'm Okay," he added as he saw Ianto nod his understanding.

He looked Ianto directly into his eyes. "I will be back, I promise," he said.

Ianto saw his concern and smiled gently, misunderstanding the intent.

"I'll be fine," he advised, "I've got plenty to do." He indicated to the number of journal articles and large rolls of paper on his desk.

"I'm hoping to complete mapping out the survey we did, then I want to start working out where we should place all the monitors Tosh is bringing up." He stopped to take a breath. "And if I finish that I'm going to follow up any other local stories about the areas see if there are any other landmarks with similar legends."

Jack nodded as he listened. "Good but don't overdo it," he admonished. "Your hand is still in a cast."

Ianto smiled, it had taken him a while to get used to the way Jack looked out for him but he understood it as genuine concern borne out of friendship, "I'll be careful, no overdoing it, "he said.

"Good," Jack said as Ianto reached out for his coat and handed it to him.

He paused, reluctant to leave. "Three days, five days tops," he repeated resisting the urge to hug Ianto goodbye.

Ianto smiled. "I'll be fine," he said.

"Ok," Jack said as he opened the door. Looking at Ianto one last time he saw him return to the task at hand.
-@-

Jack stepped warily through into the Hub as the main door rolled aside to let him enter. He could see nothing that was immediately wrong. The lights were fully on and he could see Tosh at her work station and he noted she had a different look; she was not wearing her glasses and she was showing cleavage.

"Tosh!" he called out. "What the hell is going on? I've been trying to get hold of you for three days!"

She turned in surprise towards him as someone he did not recognise came out of his office down the short steps to join her. It was a young man with blond hair and from the way he walked up to Tosh and touched her it was clear this was someone she knew.

"Jack," Tosh called out in greeting, pleased to see him as he walked up to join her. "How was the conference?"

"What conference? I had to leave Ianto to come down here. I've been unable to raise any of you for days and I 'm in no mood..." he paused as he looked at the young man, "and who are you," he demanded of the stranger standing with Tosh with an inane grin on his face.

"Jack you are such a kidder," the man said as he reached out and grabbed his arm. "Remember." As he did Jack's face broke into a grin.

"Yeah, but had you going for just a second right?" Jack laughed along with Adam.

"Not even for a second," Adam replied, grinning.

Jack moved across to his desk, took his cell phone out, turned it off and then placed it in the top left drawer of his desk, closing it firmly. Then he took off his coat and hung it on the coat rack.

"I came as soon as I could. Fill me in on what happened?" he asked Adam, Owen and Tosh as they gathered in his office.

"Everything was fine here, normal Torchwood day," Owen began to explain.

"Like any day could here could be normal," Adam retorted.

"As I was saying," Owen continued glaring at Adam, "a nothing out of the ordinary day, no incursions, or rift activity and only one weevil sighting," he explained.

"Gwen went home. Next thing I get a call from her, she's screaming about having this intruder in the house," Owen continued.

"We race over there thinking the worst and she's holding a gun on Rhys," Tosh added.

"Rhys!" Jack exclaimed.

" Poor bloke was scared to death she was actually going to shoot him, convinced he was stalking her, pointed out all the photographs of them together, she was going on hysterically how he must have broken in and put them there, until Rhys pointed out the engagement ring on her finger, " Adam continued.

"We brought her back here, and I've run every test I can think of, but so far nothing has indicated what might have caused her to forget him," Owen advised. "There's no sign of long term damage or alien intervention, but I must have missed something, so for now it's a mystery to me why she does not remember Rhys."

"Any rift activity?" Jack asked, deep in thought.

"There was something about four days ago," Tosh said shaking her head, "but for once nothing came through."

"Where's Gwen now?" Jack asked.

"Staying with a friend. She refuses to go home, poor Rhys is beside himself with worry," Tosh replied sadly.

Jack pulled his lip. "Why don't we set up a video link? Owen you bring Gwen back here., I'll go back and set up the connection and see Rhys, get him to tell Gwen some of their experiences , might trigger a reaction," he said.

"Good idea," Tosh agreed. "I'll get everything set up." She stood up and moved back to her work station and began to work setting up the video link.

Jack sat with Rhys on the sofa in the flat he shared with Gwen. Rhys was in his dressing gown looking very distressed as he watched Jack set up the small digital camera.

"Ok Rhys," Jack said adjusting the screen so it captured Rhys head and shoulders.

"Is this really necessary?" Rhys asked angrily

"She needs to remember, "Jack replied firmly. "Where did you meet?" he asked.

"At college," Rhys explained. "Fancied her the moment I saw her. Not just her looks mind, I mean she is a looker," he shook his head then put his head into his hands as he broke down.

"Tell me about your first kiss," Jack prompted aware of his distress.

"It was in the supermarket, I was going to make spaghetti bolognaise and I realised I didn't have any garlic, then I thought can't kiss a girl with garlic breath..."

Adam turned to Gwen who was back at the Hub watching and listening, "Do you recall any of this? "He asked her.

"Sort of," Gwen paused. "It's like I'm seeing what he's I saying, but I don't remember how I felt."

Adam put his hand against Gwen's face. "Believe me when I tell you that that is your fiancé.Your memory is just playing tricks on you that's all," he explained as he comforted her.

Rhys looked at Jack as he turned off the link. "This is all your fault isn't it ", he stated angrily "Bloody pills to make you forget, Gwen told me, is this what happened to Ianto? Bloody magic pills..."

Jack looked momentarily confused, and interrupted him not sure what the hell Rhys was talking about, "I assure you, I did not do this," he said adamantly.

"You had better fix this Jack," Rhys demanded.

"I will, as soon as we work out what is going on," Jack advised. "Right now Tosh is going though the archives looking for anything that might help; Owen is doing every test he can think of." He took hold of Rhys by the forearms. "I will fix this" he promised.

"Better bloody had," Rhys stated as he sat down back into the sofa.

-@-

Scrolling though the lines of information Ianto rolled his neck to ease the stiffness standing in front of the library computer too long had caused. With Jack gone he had decided to fast forward the review of literature and get as much done as possible He wanted to show him how much he had managed to achieve during the time he had been away.

He rubbed the sore spot on his neck again as he reached down and pulled out his cell phone. Why had Jack not returned any of his voice mails or texts? Jack had said he would leave his phone on at all times he recalled. Jack had called late that first day to advise he had arrived and Ianto had given him a run down on what he had done that day, but since then nothing.

He wished he had some other way of contacting him. He swallowed down the feeling of panic that had been growing over the past days. Perhaps something had happened to him and he couldn't respond, maybe he had had an accident and was critically injured somewhere.

He took deep breath as a wave of anxiety filled him. He checked his phone again, who could he call? He knew so little about the Captain, where did he come from and where was he?

Tosh he thought suddenly. He had met Tosh, maybe she could help. He picked up his notes and headed back to their office as fast as he could.

-@-

Tosh walked into the board room at the Hub. "Any idea when this came through? I t has a low meson energy reading," Tosh asked handing an ornately carved box to Adam.

"I think I found it during an excavation," he said, taking the box from her and examining it as Jack entered the room.

"Okay," Jack said as he place a large metal box on the board room table. "Let's start going through the archives and see if we have anything that might help restore memories, starting with this."

Adam moved and put his hand on Jacks shoulder. "Remember, we set up a search of the archives at the beginning of the year. I left the completed report you asked for on your desk."

"Of course," Jack said momentarily perplexed, "remind me what we found?"

"Nothing, we found nothing," Adam explained. "A systematic search of the artefacts and archives has found nothing that would help. There are several objects that Owen reckons have possible medical applications, but who knows?"

"Oi!" Owen said indignantly as he came into the room, "I am still determining their function."

Gwen entered the room and joined them, her long face and hands in her coat pocket indicated how miserable she was feeling.

"How's it going?" Jack asked kindly as he put an arm around her shoulder as she joined them.

"I'm Ok," she said sadly.

"You don't sound Ok, should you be at work, I did give you several days off," he added concerned.

"No I'm sick of being at home, it's all still a blur, thought I might be better off being here," she explained.

Jack nodded to the others who left to work on various task, as they did he gently led Gwen to his office.

-@-
Starting from the top of Jack's desk Ianto systematically searched its contents. He scrutinised every scrap of paper, he opened every book and shook it just in case something, anything might fall out. He checked every page of the address book he had found, but it was no use as it only contained contacts regarding their work, and he recognised all of them. He opened the left drawer then the right. He turned on Jack computer but to his dismay found it password protected, after three attempts at guessing what it might be, the security programme pop-up told him he was now locked out.

There was nothing. His hope of finding a way to contact Tosh had failed and he slammed the right drawer shut in frustration. He sat for several moments and looked at the rain as it hit the window, pondering what he was going to do now. 'What was her full name?' He thought. 'Toshiko Sato. It wasn't like it was common name. He stepped over to his computer and began to search the names in the white pages.

Several numbers came up scattered thought out the United Kingdom with the initial T Sato and he sat back. 'This was crazy,' he thought, 'I am now going to start calling complete strangers, and say

"Sorry to bother you I'm looking for Toshiko Sato, small Japanese woman er yeah, do you know her, well actually, I'm looking for Jack Harkness, Captain Jack Harkness…".' He put his hand to his forehead. 'This is not right' he thought, 'I can't just ring random people in the hope one of them is the person I am looking for.'

He sat back trying to think as his stomach churned with worry. When Jack came up here to set up this project he must have given the University all sorts of information including, who he was working for. A project of national importance; wasn't it that what Rosemary had said? Someone somewhere in this university must know who was funding this project; they must have some contact details. He picked up the phone and called the secretary to the dean.

-@-

Gwen sat down in front of Jack's desk as he closed his office door then took his chair and sat down next to Gwen.

"How is it going, really? He asked her.

"It's still blur but I'm beginning to recall things," she a slight smile touched her face. "I recalled Rhys the Rant last night."

"Rhys the Rant?" Jack repeated, encouraging her to speak.

"He had a go at the checkout operator at our local store last night and I just burst out laughing," she told him.

Jack listened smiling, as he nodded in understanding recalling how Gwen had shared this part of Rhys's personality with him on previous occasions.

Gwen leaned forward." I know you told me to take some time off, but I came back to work for a reason," she explained. "Rhys keeps telling me something is wrong, and about some bloke called Ianto. He reckons, I should remember him: Ianto Jones. He said he was a Torchwood operative who went missing. "

Jack shook his head as he thought, "We've never had an operative here called Ianto, do you think whatever caused your loss of memory might be affecting Rhys?" he asked, concerned at her comment.

"I don't know Jack, all I know is he is very insistent." She took a deep breath. "He said you didn't just come back from some conference, you've been away for months, and apparently I've been running operations, that's how he knows about Torchwood. With you gone and all the time I was here running things, it caused a terrible strain in our relationship and we almost broke off the engagement because of it. He said I told him about Torchwood with your approval and from all accounts it was pretty volatile. He demanded proof and I brought him here and showed him around the Hub and introduced him to Tosh and Owen."

He shook his head as he looked at her, " I recall we brought Rhys into knowing about Torchwood, because he followed you here and you insisted we didn't Retcon him, because he had been lied to enough .You were very vocal if I recall, " he said certain of his recollection.

"Yes that's what I remember too," she stood up as she continued, "but it's not like Rhys to make something like this up and he's certain." She began to pace as she explained more of what Rhys had told her.

Jack watched her as he listened.

"Ianto was the archivist administrator at Torchwood. He always wore a suit, and made very good coffee," she said. "You and this Ianto were having a work place romance, nothing in the open but quietly in the back ground. After you went off with the Doctor, Ianto had some kind of breakdown. He was such a private person none of us knew anything about it until it was too late. We found he had engineered his own disappearance and taken some kind experimental dose of Retcon, which destroyed his memoires," she took a breath.

"Apparently we searched for him for weeks with no luck. Eventually Tosh found him by setting up some kind of search programme based on his car. When you came back and found he was missing you raced to where he was in the hope you could jog his memories. You've been there with him ever since, until you arrived back a few days ago." She took a breath and sat down leaning towards Jack. "He told me I had explained it like a tragic love story."

Jack tapped his top lip with his finger as he looked at Gwen. As much as she might deny the possibility, could whatever had affected her now be affecting Rhys, he wondered? He would talk to Owen and get him to go and check Rhys out, maybe there was some indicators that could shed some light on what was going on here.

Ianto Jones, Ianto Jones, he repeated to himself. It sounded familiar, but living in Wales should he be surprised? Ianto was unusual, but Jones was one of the most common Welsh surnames.

He stood up, and went to his office door, opened it and called out to Adam who was standing alongside Tosh as her work station. "Adam, are you ready yet? That weevil wont' catch itself you know." He then opened his right top desk draw taking out his revolver, checked it was loaded, put it into the holster then buckled the belt around his waist.

He put his hand on Gwen's shoulder for reassurance. "Let me assure you Gwen I've been here a long time and I'd remember if we had ever had someone working here called Ianto Jones."

"Are you certain Jack, absolutely certain?" Gwen asked as she observed the sad look that now formed on Jack's face as he started to speak.

"Gwen I'm certain and do you know why?" He took a sharp breath. ", I made a decision a long time ago, no work place romances, and no long term relationships outside of Torchwood either," he said quietly, "and I have kept that vow for over 40 years."

Gwen looked up at him her eyes widening. "Tell me you haven't been on your own all this time?" she asked, shocked at his revelation.

"The trouble with being immortal Gwen is you have to watch every one you care age and die or die too young." He hesitated for a moment then added, "It would take someone incredibly special for me to cross that line again," he revealed quietly.

"Maybe somewhere out there, there is someone, there has to be," she added hoping she could lighten his thoughts.

He took a deep breath. "I don't think so Gwen, a soul can only cope with so much loss and grief, I couldn't risk opening myself." He paused. "Not again." He saw the sad look on her face. "I've had the odd passing liaison," he admitted," but no-one I have let in, and certainly no one within Torchwood," he said after a few moments has passed.

"If you're sure Jack," she said still not convinced.

"I am. There has never been an operative here called Ianto Jones," he said as he stepped out of his office. "Come on Adam let's go!" he shouted, heading for the garage as Adam raced to join him.

-@-

With extreme reluctance Ianto turned the key in the lock and opened the door to Jacks flat and stepped inside.

He had been gone nine days and all his efforts to find him had come to nothing. The University had been no help, the project was independently funded, and the arrangements were classified. The secretary had advised him she was not unsympathetic to his situation but there was nothing she could tell him to assist him further.

He took a look around. It was a bit of a mess as Jack had obviously left in a hurry. There was a mug on the kitchen table with a spread out newspaper underneath. He walked over and picked up the mug it was half filled with brown liquid, a film of scum across the top. He took it to the sink, emptied it out, and filled it with water leaving it to soak. He returned to the table and picked up the paper hoping there was something underneath. The table was bare. He folded the newspaper placed it back neatly on the table.

He had gone to the Police and asked them to search if there had been any reports of accidents involving the number plate of Jack's car, but none had been reported. His next step they told him was to have him listed as a missing person.

He opened the door to the bathroom and looked in. There several towels were on the floor. He bent down, scooped them up, and threw them in the washing machine.

A search using every available resource, limited as it may be, had found nothing. He was in no phone directory, or electoral register. He had googled the name and found a single reference from World War Two, the Battle of Britain. There had been Captain Jack Harkness; an American. He had been an air pilot killed during a training exercise in 1941. He had found this out using the Imperial War Museum archive and paying a large fee to access his military records. The photograph included was not Jack. Well it been a last straw and it couldn't be him anyway Jack looked to be about 39 to 40 years old, if he had been that Captain Harkness he would be well into his 90's. Ianto admitted it was a measure of his desperation that had led him to check in the first place.

He walked through and opened the bedroom door. The bed was unmade. He opened the wall cupboard; some of his shirts were still here on hangers but nothing else. The flat was devoid of any personal effects. If he removed the shirts there would nothing to indicate he had ever been here. He sat on the side of the bed and saw he had missed something. He picked up what looked like a science fiction novel; he flicked through it and put it back.

He picked up the pillow and held it to his chest. Its smell reminded him of Jack and he closed his eyes. He was frightened, scared for Jack and himself. As each day had passed the terrible feeling of loss that had haunted him had returned worse than he had ever experienced and had become all encompassing. It had made sleep impossible and he could barely swallow, let alone eat.

He had tried to work out why the feeling was so distressing and he had come to realise it centred on losing Jack. He lay down on the bed and put the pillow under his head. He was gone, disappeared. People went missing every day never to be seen again. It meant he would never see Jack again.

Ianto lay on the bed trying to breathe through the feelings of panic that now overwhelmed him and he fell into a black state, his mind swirling. He suddenly felt sick. he sprang up, just making it to the bathroom he threw up into the sink. There was nothing in his stomach but that didn't stop the terrible retching. As the sensation eased he sunk to the floor.

Several moments passed and he pulled himself up and turned on the cold tap to rinse the sink as he did he leant forward and took a mouth full of water from the tap and spat it out. Making his way back to the bed, he lay down and wrapped the sheets and blankets around himself. Holding the pillow to his chest, he closed his eyes against the terrible emptiness that began to overtake him. 'Where are you Jack?' He asked himself over and over again.

-@-

Jack pulled himself out of the man hole on the waste ground and saw Adam waiting for him exposed by the feeble security light.

"Jack was it down there? The weevil?" Adam asked as Jack pulled himself into the light.

"Yeah, of course," Jack replied, suggesting he did not really want to talk.

"You ok?" Adam asked. "What did you see?"

"My past," Jack replied.

"What about the past? Is it your childhood?" Adam put his hand on Jack shoulder, "I've always been here for you Jack, from the very beginning. I'm the one you can confide in, remember?".

Jack took a deep breath. "It was meant to be buried, I buried that memory over 150 years ago.

Why now?" he asked, angrily walking away leaving Adam to follow.

"Well maybe it's time. Maybe up until now your subconscious has been protecting you, but you can't block out the past forever," Adam said encouragingly as he followed behind him.

"I can't afford to remember," Jack said forcefully.

"Jack talk to me, please," Adam pleaded. "I can help trust me," he paused. "Just tell me what you see. Where are you, Jack?".

Obeying the instruction Jack closed his eyes, "Boeshane Peninsula, my home in the 51st century. We lived under the threat of invasion. They came without warning, we thought they would pass over like they always did, but they didn't... not that day," he explained, his voice shaking.

"Who?", Adam asked quietly.

"The most horrible creatures you could possibly imagine. Their howls travelled before them. Dad told me to take Gray, he was my little brother," he took a sharp breath. " One minute I was holding his hand , I don't know when he let go, one minute his hand was in mine," Jack told him now very distressed. "I screamed out his name, I don't know when he let go, he was just behind me. I retraced my steps hoping I would see him again, I ran all the way home".

"What did you find?" Adam asked.

"My father was dead, my mother was covered in blood. She asked me where Gray was, "he told Adam, appalled at the memory he was reliving.

"It was my fault, I searched for Gray for years, and I never found his body!" Jack shouted at Adam.

"It wasn't your fault," Adam comforted Jack.

"I let go of his hand, it was the worst day of my life. It's the last thing I want to remember." He told Adam angrily as he stalked off towards the SUV.

***

Chapter 15

Tosh held the strange gold carved box turning over in her hand. "So according to the molecular breakdown this potentially complex alien artefact is in fact made of wood," she stated to Owen in disgust.

"Perhaps it fell in the crate by mistake, picked up meson energy with the other stuff in the crate Jack found," Owen tried to explain.

"I don't think so," Tosh answered sarcastically. " Adam brought it back from an excavation."

"I think Jack brought it in, I recall it was included in a box of various artefacts," he tried to explain, hurt by the disdainful look on her face.

"No, I'm sure Adam found it on an excavation some months back," she stated as Jack entered the room.

"No, I was sure it was you Jack, who brought in the box," Owen said to Jack expecting him to agree with him.

Jack took the box from Tosh and turned it over in his hands. "I don't recall bringing it in," he replied, examining it.

"Adam brought it in," Tosh argued.

"If he did it will be noted in the artefact log," Owen told her.

"No point looking," Tosh told them both. "Adam found it during an excavation."

Owen let out a sigh as he looked at Jack then glanced at his watch shaking his head, "I've had enough for one day, this argument can wait for tomorrow," Owen said as he turned to leave.

Tosh watched as Owen left and checked her cell phone and began to smile as she read the text message, "I've gotta go meet Adam," she said to no-one in particular , as she turned and made her way out towards the Hub exit.

Jack continued to examine the box. There was something compelling about it which he couldn't put his finger on. He looked up briefly as both Tosh and Owen left. "Think I'll go and check the log," he said to himself.

Jack walked into his office and put the box on his desk and sat down. Looking around for the artefact log, he pulled open the left top drawer. It was stuck as if it had been jammed shut. He gave it a hard sharp tug, as he did so the contents shot forward in a jumble. "Ha, here you are," he exclaimed as he saw his cell phone. He had looked everywhere for it and it had been in here all along.

He turned it on. There were 32 phone messages and an almost equal number of texts. How long since he had checked it? He looked at the date, ten days. Unconsciously he turned the phone off and began to put the phone back into the drawer. He stopped himself and turned the phone back on and scrolled through the list. As he did so, he again felt an overwhelming compulsion to turn off the phone, and felt himself begin to put the phone back into the drawer.

He hesitated. There were so many messages from the same number. Someone had obviously been trying to contact him. He heard a voice in his head telling him it was important he check his messages. Fighting the temptation to turn it off and return it to the drawer, he scrolled to the first message and began to listen.

Moving with speed Jack opened the small fridge in the lab; he pulled out the caddy of blood samples. Where was Adam's? He spun the caddy around checking each one, it was missing. Another vial in particular caught his attention, and he pulled it out, reading the name on the label his face became even darker. He put the samples back and went to Gwen's work station. Turning it on he began to search through all the CCTV footage from the previous days. If he was right Adam did not exist until approximately ten days ago.

He observed the extensive footage as Adam went through his memory routine touching along with the phrase, remember , remember ,remember. It was like he was recalling a man who didn't exist. He looked at the footage again as a deep rage began to build inside him.

Adam didn't exist, but Ianto Jones did. At first he had no recollection of him but as he had listened to each message the voice had literally resonated in his mind and his memory of Ianto returned.

The man he loved, and told he would only be gone for three days. He looked at his watch, 3.30am. He set up the system to check the trace on Ianto's car he had put there on his first visit to the university. He watched anxiously for it to indicate his location. His heart leapt in fear as he realised his car was not where he expected it to be. He looked again and he took in a sharp breath as he saw it was parked at his own apartment. He now let out the same breath, he knew the location of the car, but was Ianto there with it? He placed his palm over the icon. 'Please,' he prayed, ' let Ianto be ok.' He dialled the number and it rang- rang- rang- rang- rang- rang-rang-rang-rang at last he heard an anxious voice reply.

-@-

Rhys opened the door of the flat he shared with Gwen. "Gwen's gone, she just left, " he told Jack in a concerned whisper as he looked over Jack to check they were not being observed.

"I saw her leave," Jack replied as he followed Rhys down the hall into the main living area.

"What the hell is going on?" Rhys asked as they both stood by the sofa. "I don't like lying to Gwen."

" I need your help," Jack told him matter- of- factly.

"My help? You must be desperate," Rhys replied honestly.

Jack crossed his arms and explained what he had discovered.

"An alien," Rhys said in astonishment. "An alien who is feeding off every ones memories."

Jack nodded. "He plugs himself in by touch and creates false memories of himself and when he does it displaces the real ones," he explained.

"That's what happened to Gwen then?", Rhys asked.

"Yeah," Jack replied.

"How did you figure this out?" Rhys asked. "I mean it's been days."

"I found my phone full of messages from Ianto. He's been trying to contact me for ten days," he replied

"So he does exist," Rhys stated.

"Yeah," Jack agreed. "Long story... let's just say he is a person of significant importance to me and..."

"Is he ok?" Rhys asked, concerned.

"He's ok for now, worried sick for me. How he really is I won't know is until I get back," Jack said, recalling the phone call earlier on that morning.

Rhys walked into the kitchen. "Right," he said, filling up the kettle. "I need my Gwen back and you need to get back to Ianto. How do we sort the little sod out? " he asked.

Jack raised his eyebrows. "The first thing you need to know, is on no account let him touch you."

"Understood, " Rhys said nodding.

-@-

Jack stood outside the Hub running through the plan he had worked out with Rhys.

First step isolate Adam. Second, destroy every computer record; wipe all the CCTV footage and every scrap of evidence of Adams existence. He had come up with a plan to explain the destruction of the data. Torchwood was about to experience the worst computer virus in history. Alien in origin it would literally wipe every trace of electronic data from the time Adam turned up.

Jack would then take Owen and Tosh and administer Retcon to them. He would use Ianto's technique to restore a false memory of the last two weeks in theory this would allow their real personalities, to return.

Rhys would take Gwen home and administer Retcon there. He had offered Rhys the same opportunity but he had declined. He had advised Jack that if he knew what had happened then any questions Gwen may have his reply would deepen her new memories. Secondly, if this was ever to occur again Rhys would be able to alert Jack.

Jack steeled himself for what was to come because he had something planned for Adam. For this plan to work he had to remember. He was aware he would have to live with the revived memory of his brother. It was his most painful, shameful memory, but he would suffer it for Ianto's sake. By doing so maybe he could atone in some small way for failing both Ianto and Gray. The door rolled open and he stepped through.

Jack entered the Hub observing the morning activity with Tosh at her work station, Owen walking down the steps from the green house. He entered his office took off his coat, and waited until he saw Adam was seated at his desk.

Taking his revolver out of his desk he checked it was loaded. Now he walked out and stood behind Adam and cocked his gun close to the back of his head.

"Speak to me Adam if that is even your name," Jack stated.

"What" said Adam in surprise as he turned around to face Jack.

"What the hell are you doing?" Tosh asked shocked.

"He didn't exist until ten days ago," Jack replied keeping the barrel of the gun facing Adams head.

"Can you tell me what's going on?" Adam asked as if this was a joke being played on him.

"Jack we've known him for years he's part of the team", Owen pointed shocked at Jacks actions.

"He just made you think that," Jack said calmly.

"You know me, Jack you recruited me three years ago," Adam stated with desperate edge to his voice. As he spoke he reached out to touch Jack's arm

"Ha you don't get to me that way," Jack stated jerking his hand away to avoid Adams touch.

"Who is Ianto Jones?" He asked the group briefly glancing at each of them.

He saw nothing on their face except for a growing realisation on Gwen's face at the significance of Jacks confession the previous day came to her.

"Exactly, none of us would have ever forgotten him, except for him." His face twisted as he spoke. He's has been feeding himself on our memories by touch and by doing so he disturbed our real memories".

"I have no idea what you are talking about," Adam said doing his best to pretend this was all a mistake.

Jack grabbed the front of Adams shirt, and lifted him to his feet ",I'm taking him to the vaults".

"Jack this is ridiculous," Owen tried to point out trying to keep up with events.

"Jack No," Tosh cried out now distressed as Jack grabbed Adam lifting him to his feet.

"Move!" Jack shouted as he pushed Adam towards the vaults.

Tosh leapt forward and grabbed the gun from Jacks hand. "NO," she cried out she pointed the gun at Jack.

"That's not going to help," Gwen tried to reason with Tosh as she moved slowly towards her in an effort to take the gun from her.

"I'm just going to lock him up," Jack said as he tried to reason with her keeping his attention fully on Adam.

"Let him go," Tosh demanded pointing the gun at Jack.

"I'm not going to harm him," Jack told her quietly.

"Why should I believe you," Tosh demanded in sheer panic.

"Tosh we can talk about this," Owen advised keeping himself calm as he also moved towards Tosh along with Gwen.

"Let him go," Tosh said in desperation. As she spoke Owen and Gwen simultaneously grabbed the hand holding the gun . All three fell to the floor and after a struggle Owen wrestled the gun from her hands.

"This is what you've done to us," Jack snarled as he saw Tosh stand up and push first both Gwen then Adam. " Move," Jack demanded of Adam shoving him firmly.

"Adam," Tosh screamed out as Jack pushed Adam further towards the vaults.

-@-
Deep in an abandoned part of the Hub, Jack looked at Adam in revulsion as he tested the strength of the bars of his cell.

"Don't kill me I had to come part of your memories in order to survive, I didn't mean any harm," Adam spat out as he squirmed under Jacks gaze.

"You changed us," Jack told him.

"I made you better, you didn't remember who you were I helped you. Look at Owen all his cynicism gone he's a different man now, he's selfless, happier, " he paused. "Toshiko too, she has never been so confident," Adam told him proudly.

"And Ianto, you would have let me abandon him again. After all the hurt I caused, you would have me do that to him again, " Jack stated, visibly upset at the implication of what could have happened, what could still happen. Adam wisely remained silent as Jack fought for control of himself.

"Why us?" Jack asked finally after several moments had passed.

"All of you have such unique memories, especially you Jack. All those extraordinary memories you hold, some hidden, some absent. Your singular mind, that's what drew me here ," Adam advised.

"Good job, it's what we do best, wipe out aliens," Jack told Adam with crossed arms.

"I was in the void for so long, the colours of this world almost blinded me. It was so beautiful out there after the darkness and stench of fear ,don't send me back into the darkness" he beseeched as he saw the look on Jacks face.

"I don't intend to," Jack stated. "Right now Tosh, Gwen and Owen are in the process of taking a dose of Retcon. When they wake up they you will be erased from their memories and then there will be just me and one other left, " Jack explained the quietness in his voice disguising the rage he felt.

"So I get to live! So much for Jack the alien killer," Adam taunted.

Jack smiled a terrible smile, "You don't understand Adam, this place I've brought you is the deepest abandoned part of the Hub. No one comes down here, only I know it exists and I assure you after I leave here and close that door," he pointed to the massive metal, bolted door to the right of the cell, " no one is going to come here for hundreds of years."

He moved forward as he continued, "I'm immortal Adam, while I live ,you will remain here," he spat out the final word as he punched his pointed finger to the ground.

"Jack don't leave me here, " Adam pleaded, as he realised the full implication of Jacks words. "Not forever in this place, alone in the dark, trapped in this reality with no chance of escape."

He struggled against the bars putting an arm through in an effort to reach Jack.

"That carved box you found contains all the memories you and Ianto shared before you left. Let me go" he begged, "and I can make it so it never happened. You returned and he is waiting for you, you can hold him in your arms and tell him how much you love him. You can share his life with him just as you planned."

He looked at Jack who had his arms crossed, a cruel look set on his face as he listened in complete silence.

"Wouldn't it be lovely, Ianto in your arms safe and happy with you, "he said in his most persuasive voice.

"You could share that symbol of true love you found with him. Remember how the Doctor laughed and told you it was a replica, all the originals being lost to time. But as you held it images of Ianto came to you and it reacted. Then something came alive inside you for the first time, in how long Jack , how long ?" he shouted his voice rising in desperation.

"You lock me away and you lose everything I offer. You do this and he will never remember. His mind is locked. He will never recall what you once meant to him. He will never remember he loves you. It's all there, I can sense it, but the linkages in his mind are destroyed. I can give it all back to you, just don't leave me here" he screamed out.

Jack turned away towards the door, "Good bye Adam," he said.
-@-

His thoughts centred on Ianto, Jack took the turning to the right and followed the signs to the next intersection. If he travelled all night he would be back with him by morning. How he was going explain his absence at this point was beyond him for the time being, because Ianto deserved to hear nothing but the truth.

From his conversation Ianto had been more concerned that Jack was safe and unharmed in any way. In typical Ianto fashion he put his own welfare second and the relief in his voice was more than Jack could bear to hear. How could he have let this happen? He cursed Adam at what amounted to nothing less than emotional rape. The only positive to come out of this if there was one, was to thank God Ianto was not there. He shuddered to think, what Adam might have done to him if he had.

Tomorrow when Gwen woke up she would never recall what he had told her. He had kept that vow to himself for over 40 years. It had been someone special that had caused him to cross that line. Someone so exceptional he would have crossed that line if it had been the other side of the universe.

He thought back to those months as he has struggled with his growing feelings. How hard he had resisted not wanting to expose himself to being hurt again. This was Torchwood he knew from bitter experience, there were no happy endings. But this man, this man had affected him so profoundly he recognised his entire future existence would be impoverished without him in his life.

He smiled in remembrance at Ianto's attempts to seduce him, successful attempt he corrected himself. A willing seduction as there had ever been.

When Ianto had made his move, his resolve was melted by the taste of his kisses, his hands on his body, the smell of him. The weight of him as they entwined and called out each other's names in the release of their mutual passion.

As Ianto had slept, he had immersed himself in the closeness he so craved and had denied himself so long. He took in a sharp breath at the realisation of what he had lost. Why had he remained silent when he should have declared his feelings and intentions? He had been a true fool. One thing he knew for sure, he was not leaving Ianto's side again until he could share his life fully with him.

He pondered on the loss of his memories over the past days, he literally had no recollection of him not even a stray thought. Was this what it was like for Ianto? Was Adam right were the linkages damaged beyond repair in his mind? Did that explain the look of confusion he saw at times on Ianto's face, a disconnection between what he was feeling and what it meant?

A car passed him, and he now began to address the deep fears he held for Ianto. Had his disappearance triggered the terrible feelings of loss and abandonment that had led to his breakdown? He took a deep breath to release the tension he felt building in his chest. Would it set back the small beginnings that had shown such promise and which he had pinned all his hopes too?

So many unknowns and what the hell was he going to tell him?

Ianto lay in deep sleep, the first true sleep he had since he realised Jack was missing and for once it was a dreamless. The relief at the sound of his voice had eased all the fear he had felt and he had wept with relief. Again this effect Jack had upon him he could not fathom, right now he didn't care. All he could think of was Jack was on his way back, and he thanked god, he thanked the heavens , the universe, the dawn, the sun, the moon, the sky , and the stars that Jack was safe and would be here soon.

-@-

Ianto watched as Jack came out of the lift from his open door. As Jack approached his apartment door Ianto moved towards him and without warning hugged him. Jack was momentarily taken aback as Ianto threw his arms around him in a spontaneous hug of relief at seeing him safe. With Ianto's arms around him, he struggled not to become lost in this longed for moment of physical intimacy and retuned it with the same intent.

"What happened, Jack?" Ianto asked his face creased with concern as they pulled apart. Jack followed Ianto into his flat. He pulled out two kitchen chairs and they sat facing each other knee to knee. Before speaking he took both Ianto's hands into his and looked directly into his eyes.

"Ianto I am not going to lie to you," he paused briefly knowing this was going to be tough. He had thought long and hard of what he could say and decided that Ianto deserved the truth. "Right now in this very moment, there is no explanation I can give you," he said.

"I need to know Jack. You were gone ten days. I can't begin to tell you how worried I've been," he struggled to control his voice.

Jack kept his gaze, "I will tell you this, it was not at my choice and I ask you to trust me that I would never...never willingly have kept out of contact."

He took a breath knowing what he had to say next was going to be difficult. "There is an explanation, and if you ask me in one year I will give it to you," he said.

"Jack I need an explanation now," he burst out visibly upset as he struggled to understand Jack's reply. "You have no idea what I've been through," he struggled to find the right words. "I was terrified, something had happened to you, I thought you must have been in some terrible accident or you had been killed...that... that... I would never see you again," he stammered not able to stop himself as he momentarily lost control.

"It was ten days Jack," he repeated as he fought to control himself not wanting Jack to know just how much his disappearance had affected him.

Jack listened and watched trying to hold onto his own emotions as Ianto expressed in his body language how much his absence had cost him and was visibly shaken by what he saw.

"You deserve to hear the truth, but I doubt you would believe me," Jack said honestly the words catching his breath as he spoke.

"What could be so farfetched, I wouldn't believe you?" Ianto burst out letting go of his hands and sitting back.

Jack took a breath, thinking of how Ianto might react if he told him the truth.

"I am human being from the 51st century. I'm 140 years old, can't die and am basically immortal. I'm head of the Torchwood Institute that hunts down alien technology arming humanity for the future.

I fell in love with you, yes YOU, but I was so used to shielding myself, I failed to see you loved me. I have caused you immeasurable hurt and I am trying to do everything in my power to make it right.

I set up this whole project so I could come up here be by your side, in the fool's hope you might remember you loved me. And if that fails, I cling to the hope that some miracle might occur and you will fall in love with me all over again. I ache for you. Every moment I spend not being able to touch you or tell you how I feel is torture.

Oh and an alien infiltrated Torchwood and for 10 days I forgot you existed."

"One year Ianto," Jack repeated, "and I will tell you everything."

"Everything," Ianto repeated not sure if he fully understood what was going on.

"Everything," Jack said with sincerity.

Ianto drew back. "Or is it something else," he said his eyes narrowing as a realisation dawned on him. "That you don't trust me enough, to let me in on what really happened," he said as he worked it out in his head.

"No, Ianto. No, I would trust you with...," Jack said at Ianto's outburst as he stopped himself before he said too much.

"There is so much secrecy Jack. I'm supposed to be working on a project of national importance and no one has heard of it or you, "he said thinking of his efforts over the past days which had only deepened the mystery surrounding Captain Jack Harkness and the project he had set up.

Jack sat back thinking ,he had promised himself that he would not lie to Ianto, but his partial reply had only made things worse. He could see the man was shrinking into himself, radiating distress, confusion and distrust, to move forward he had to tell him something. He took a deep breath.

"I'm head of the Torchwood Institute, which is based in Cardiff, Wales. That's where I've been for the past ten days. Toshiko Sato also works there," he saw the surprise on Ianto's face at his admission.

"If you look Torchwood up you won't find any information, because we are a highly classified organisation that works outside the normal channels of government. We have our own brief and act independently depending on circumstances." He looked at the uncertainty on Ianto's face , " and if need be, I can get any number of people on the phone right now including the head of UNIT or the Prime Minister to confirm every word I've told you. "

Ianto sat back in thought. "Torchwood, so that's who I'm working for," he said after several moments passed thinking the turn of events may actually require him to ask for proof.

"In a manner of speaking, but in reality you are in fact working for me," Jack corrected him.

"Why me?" Ianto asked as he worked through the information as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Out of all the people here, some with years of experience in research, experts in their respective fields, why me? I was nothing but a glorified clerk come tea boy. I find information, catalogue it, then file it and make coffee." He looked at Jack. "Rosemary said you asked for me personally, why?"

Jack took a long blink as he heard the phrase tea boyand tried to formulate a response.

"You truly believe that don't you, that your just a glorified fact finder and filer who just happens to make good coffee," he said looking at Ianto as he came to realise he was actually describing what he believed his role within Torchwood had been.

"You are far more than that to me... more than just a tea boy," he said vehemently. "I couldn't have done this project without you; your efforts have been invaluable. So why you," he took a breath, "because I saw in you the potential that you have demonstrated in full measure from the moment you came on board, enthusiasm, intelligence, hard work, the ability to ask questions that have led this research in surprising directions," he looked at Ianto's face as he spoke and smiled as he continued.

"I am not sure you know this, but I stepped back months ago. Every direction this project has taken has come from an idea you came up with and," he took a deep breath as he took a risk.

"And you are a good friend; it's a connection I felt between us from the very first moment we met. I thought this is a man I would really like to know," he looked at Ianto,"really like to know," he repeated hoping Ianto would understand the intent of his statement.

"Why not someone from Torchwood? Surely one of them could have done the same...better," Ianto argued.

"We're a small team and none of them had the right combination of skills that would fit my needs for this project, I could only find that skill base in you," Jack stated categorically.

Ianto sat back as he tried to take in what he was being told.

"And I never -ever - want to hear you describe yourself to me or anyone else, as just a tea boy," Jack stated adamantly.

Ianto smiled shyly. "You still want me to make you coffee right?" he asked knowing the amount inexplicable pleasure it gave him, to make Jack happy even in this small way.

"Ianto. Your coffee is the only way I make it through the day," he replied in all honesty.

"One year," Ianto said as studied Jack's face openly for the first time.

"I promise Ianto," he replied, "one year today". He watched as Ianto sat back mulling over the conversation wondering what he was going to do or say if Ianto did not accept. Several moments passed as he watched Ianto study him, then take away his hand from the back of his neck.

"Right then in that case," Ianto said standing. "I'm gonna need that proof."

Jack looked at him and pulled out his cell phone. "Who would like to speak to first?" he asked him candidly.

Ianto thought for a moment, "Well I've never met the head of UNIT, but I've seen the Prime Minister on television so I reckon I would recognise her voice," he said firmly.

Jack smiled as he placed the call then handed the phone over to him and listened to the conversation.

"Prime Minister." he heard Ianto say, "yes, yes, I know who you are. I need to confirm...Torchwood Institute, Cardiff, got it. Captain Jack Harkness, head of. Thank you for taking the time to speak to me Prime Minister. Sorry to have bothered you," he handed the phone back to Jack and picked up his diary which was laying on the coffee table. Jack watched as he turned to the calendar at the back for the next year.

"One year today Jack," he said looking at him as he ringed the date with the pen he had picked up from the coffee table.

"The last 10 days have been hell," he said rubbing both hands over his face. "I need coffee," Ianto said as he made his way to the kitchen and begin to take out coffee canisters.

Jack stood walked and over to join him as he saw Ianto pull out the grinder.

"One year Jack, and it had better be a bloody good explanation," he said as he set up his coffee machine.

"I promise, it is," Jack replied with as much sincerity as he could, as he placed his hand on Ianto's shoulder. 'What you make of the truth will be another matter,' he said to himself.

***

Chapter 16

"This is a magnetoresistive sensor." Tosh said handing a small palm sized mushroom shaped device covered in a soft plastic coating, to Jack who then passed it to Ianto, "it's designed to pick up local variations in the earth's magnetic field," she explained.

Ianto turned the sensor over in his hand, then handed it back to Tosh who placed it back in the case along with a large number of others.

"How does it differentiate from the normal background magnetic field? "Ianto asked.

"Good question," Tosh replied as she now turned to her laptop which was on Jacks desk. "I've set up this as a demonstration," she told them as she motioned to the screen.

"When I was getting this all ready, I set up a way to ensure the sensors were calibrated in such a way that they would use the earth's background magnetic field to register the variations within a particular band," she pointed the programme now on the screen.

The screen now had a ruler down the right hand side and across the bottom. "Let me show you," she said as she clicked her mouse and lines began to appear across the screen.

Ianto and Jack moved closer and saw information was now worming its way across the screen from right to left.

"The green line is the earth's magnetic field. As you can see although it has a slight variation of movement, it has no extreme highs or lows". She explained.

"In other words, the green line should remain where it is right now, in the middle of the screen," Ianto commented.

"Exactly," Tosh replied. "However," she continued, "this is what the Unit survey noted. " She clicked her mouse again and this time a red line went across the screen sometimes crossing above and below the green line.

"It shows slow pulses of magnetic energy radiating outward," she told them.

"Like the ripples in a pond if a stones dropped in," Jack commented.

"Good analogy, that's exactly what it might look like and it will be interesting to see if it's still continuing or just something that was a one off ," she added.

Tosh moved away and picked up a small case and opened it.

"This is your main data collector", she said as she pulled out what looked like a sealed black box with several connectors and an aerial and turned it on.

"We need to bury this on site. Then once a month someone needs to go out and download all the data it has collected. You then bring it back here and upload into programme on this computer," she indicated the laptop.

"I've set up the laptop with a wireless connection, so you can do this from a car," she added

Ianto smiled at Jack, "Definitely a plus, with the weather here so changeable," he said as he saw Jack nod in agreement.

"It can go from sunny to rain in minutes," Jack added, thinking of the last time they had been at the stones. They day had begun with beautiful weather but within the space of two hours a massive storm had developed and they had only just managed to complete mapping the stones before it hit.

"I'll set up the actual programme now," Tosh said. "Once you have all the information on the lap top you can down load it onto your main server." She turned to Jack's computer and with a click of her mouse closed the demonstration programme she had shown them. With another click she now loaded the full programme she had created. A small logo appeared followed by several pops ups, then the main intro screen.

"This is excellent work, Tosh," Jack said.

Ianto moved across and picked up one of the mushroom shaped sensors and began to examine it more closely. From what he could tell it was it was a completely sealed unit with no obvious on or off button.

"How do you turn the sensors on?" Ianto asked as he turned it over in his hand.

"If you turn it over you onto its back, and press in the centre, there is a small button under the coating," Tosh replied.

Turning the sensor over, he pressed into the centre. He felt a small movement.

"Right," Tosh said as she completed the set up, "I'll show you now to transfer the information from the data collector, to the main programme.

Ianto and Jack now joined Tosh. Now she began to go through each step required to transfer the information from the lap top to the computer.

"All set to go," Tosh said now turning back to her lap top.

"Okay now I need to show you this, I calibrated each sensor, so it will match the information with its location at the henge." She clicked her mouse and a visual representation of the henge came onto the screen.

"Looks like all your hard work has paid off Ianto," Jack said moving aside to let him see the screen.

"All we need to do now is head out and place each sensor as indicated from your survey ," Tosh added finally.

"So that's our next step," Jack said as Ianto placed the sensor he was still holding on his desk and picked up a large roll of paper.

"I've worked out the exact location for each sensor," Ianto said to both of them as he unrolled the paper and pinned it to the large board that had set up for just this purpose.

"That's odd," Tosh said as she worked at Jack's computer. She looked up, "Ianto have you still got that sensor I saw you with earlier?" Tosh asked.

"Sorry, I was checking to see how it operated." He said as he picked up the sensor from his desk top turned it off and handed it back to her.

"That's Ok, it's just." She looked at the screen, "odd," she commented as she looked at the computer screen and saw that the red line indicating the sensor Ianto had held , had shot off the top of the screen.

"Everything Ok?" Jack asked seeing that her attention was completely absorbed by the information on her lap top.

She picked up the sensor again, "I think it just needs calibrating," she said as she watched the red line slowly returning back to the centre green line."

"Right," Ianto said as she joined them in front of the board. "As I was saying, I've mapped he exact location for each sensor, it should create a good overall picture of the immediate surrounding area. I thought it would be a good idea if we also placed some of the sensors further away to see how far variations radiate out."

Jack stood and listed as Ianto explained where each sensor was to be located and his reasoning for each. He smiled to himself at his young assistant's growing confidence. He wondered if it had been after Jack had told him that effectively Ianto was leading the research.

No, he thought it was something else. Something he couldn't quite put his finger on it. All he could say was that in the right circumstances, Ianto now took the lead. He had a more general air of confidence about him. If he had to put money on it, he would say it had begun after their last visit to henge. It was like something inside Ianto had turned on and he was more like his old self now than any time since the project had begun.

He listened in amusement as Tosh and Ianto started on one of their scientific debates. Well he was certainly more comfortable in Tosh's company he was pleased to note.

"Early start tomorrow," Jack interrupted them both looking at his watch. "And Tosh has had a long drive to get here."

"Yes," Tosh said as they began to assist her to re-packing the equipment.

"We'll pick you up at 7.30 am," Jack said to her as they got ready to leave.

"Your car or mine?" Ianto asked him.

"We could take mine," Jack offered.

"Well mine's been in the garage for a while about time it had another run," Ianto advised.

Jack nodded at the offer, "Ok you pick me up 7.30," he said.

"7.15," Ianto told him, "we have to pick up Tosh at 7.30."

"Ok 7.15 it is," Jack said in agreement.

"And be ready," Ianto warned him.

"I wasn't that late last time," he said as he put on his coat.

"How long can it take to put on your coat on and lock up," Ianto said to him as Tosh smiled at their banter.

"Long day tomorrow," Jack said not replying as he shook his head smiling at Ianto comments. "Get a good rest," he added as he followed Ianto out.

-@-

Using a small digging tool Ianto dug a small deep hole, using the sensor as a guide he measured it to see if it would fit it did. Taking a sensor from the case he turned it on, and covered it with dirt. He stretched his back then pulled his copy of diagram to see where the next one was needed. He stretched his back again, as he looked around. He saw Tosh waving at him, holding up a flask and a cup. He looked at his watch and taking the digging tool went to join her.

"Thanks," he said taking the offered cup. "Where's Jack?" He asked looking around hoping this was his opportunity to finally get Tosh on her own.

"Oh he went off to bury the sensors required over there," she pointed to Jack who was just visible on far right.

Ianto took a breath and felt a flutter, he was almost out of sight. Good this was the moment he had been hoping for ever since he had found out Tosh was coming up. It had almost been impossible and he was beginning to worry he would never get her on her own.

"How's the wrist holding out?," Tosh asked indicating the wrist support on Ianto right hand.

"Not too bad," Ianto replied.

"Any soreness and I can take over," she offered.

"No it's good," he said as he took a sip and looked shyly at Tosh, "Jack tells me you also work for Torchwood?" He asked quickly not wanting to waste the opportunity.

"Yes," Tosh replied Jack had advised her that he had told Ianto about Torchwood and he might have some questions.

"Have you known Jack long?" Ianto asked quietly.

"About three years now," she replied.

"Cardiff," Ianto said hesitantly, "Jack tells me you're based in Cardiff."

"Yes ,that's where we're based," she replied chirpily.

"I went a couple of times, when I was younger with my Dad. Recently I recall seeing something about the Millennium Centre," he said conversationally.

"Yes, the Centre it's amazing, right next to the bay," she advised not sure where his questions were going.

"It's such a long way up here I,... I , guess Jack's family must miss him?" he asked struggling to get the question out.

"No, he's on his own," Tosh told him thinking Jack would be most interested in the line of questions.

"He's on his own then," Ianto repeated after several moments had passed as tried to formulate his next question.

Tosh looked at him. "Oh he did have some one, but he lost him," she replied.

"Him,", Ianto repeated under his breath looking into his cup.

"Yeah, he was pretty devastated," Tosh added, "but I get the feeling just recently he may have found someone special."

Ianto looked up at her as she finished speaking . "Oh I see," he replied as he took a sip from his cup, but found it impossible to swallow. He saw Jack heading back towards them he threw the remainder of the coffee away and walked off.

"Are you two having coffee without me," he said as he joined them. Tosh took a cup and poured him one as he saw Ianto move off.

"Interesting conversation," Jack enquired as he watched as Ianto return to his task.

"He asked some questions, "Tosh told him.

"Torchwood?" He asked curiously.

"You," she said as she saw Jack nod his eyes following Ianto.

'That's good news, " he said as he smiled as he kept his eyes on his young assistant.

"Really, "Tosh exclaimed as she watched Jack gaze reluctantly return to her.

"Yeah," he said as he let out a sigh of relief, "let just say it's the first positive sign I've had that things are moving forward for a long time," he told her honestly. "So what did he ask"? He said taking a drink from his cup.

"He asked if you had any family in Cardiff. I said you were single. You did have someone important, but lost them. And now it looked like you may have found someone special," she told him excitedly.

Jack looked at her as his face dropped and took a deep breath, "So you told him I may have found someone."

"Yes, him of course," Tosh exclaimed.

"Tosh." He looked her in total frustration as he took a breath and breathed out trying to find the right words. "What he will think is I've found someone and it's not him." He saw the look of confusion on her face.

"One of Ianto's core issues was he didn't believe he was worthy of being loved, especially by me," he explained as he let out a breath in frustration.

"Oh Jack I'm sorry," she said realising her mistake. " I was just trying to help."

Jack looked at Ianto and he didn't need to be psychic to know how he might be feeling. He had taken a risk to find out more about him and had had his hopes raised and dashed in the space of a single conversation.

"Fix this," he demanded looking at her.

"How?" she asked him.

"I don't know," he said almost shouting . "Just do it."

Ianto knelt on the ground digging the next hole. 'Well' he told himself' ' you had to ask. Of course someone like Jack would have someone and even if he was on his own he wouldn't be interested in you.' The word tea boy sprung into his head. He reminded himself he had promised Jack he wouldn't refer to himself in that way anymore, but the word still came into his mind.

Alright then, predictable, reliable and all the other 'ables' he could think of. He looked across towards Jack and Tosh who were deep in a heated conversation . From what Jack had told him he had had an amazing life. He was head of some major organisation that was so classified he had had to call the Prime Minister to have it confirmed. He struggled to breathe; the type of person Jack would be interested would be dynamic, sure of themselves, not boring like him.

He wiped his face dry with his hand. Why feel sad for something that could never be and never would have been? He stabbed the ground, the information fitted in perfectly with how he felt. He placed the final sensor, and stood up, and now he would go and re- take those bloody photographs.

Jack looked up from the chart as Ianto stalked around the henge taking photographs. He did not need to see his face to know that he was unhappy. He had hardly said a word for hours; what must he thinking? He kicked the ground, every time there was movement forward, it was smothered. He was beginning to think this endeavour was cursed. He looked up and saw Ianto frozen on the spot, as he watched he saw him stagger and drop the camera, he threw the chart down and raced over.

"Are you Ok?" he asked Ianto as he arrived. Ianto bent down and picked up the camera off the ground.

"I'm fine," Ianto replied sharply as he examined the camera trying to make it work.

"I'm fine," he repeated tensely as he saw concern on Jacks face as he continued to check the camera for damage . He turned it on and off repeatedly, but it remained dead.

"Perfect," he said through his teeth handing the camera to Jack as he stormed off. "I've wrecked the camera."

Jack took the camera as he watched Ianto walk off, trying to decide if he should follow. He saw Tosh race over to join him.

"What just happened?" she asked.

"I'm not sure, Ianto said the cameras ruined," he told her.

"No, I was calibrating the sensors and suddenly they went off the chart," she told him.

"What!" Jack exclaimed giving her his full attention.

"They showed a micro burst of energy right," she looked around "here" she told him indicating the spot where Ianto had been standing.

Let me see the camera?" she asked as Jack gave it to her and she opened the back and held her scanner to it.

"Ianto is right, this camera its ruined , but I don't think dropping it did this kind of damage," she said as she reviewed her scanner. "Every electrical connection has been disrupted. " She handed the camera back to Jack.

"What?" he repeated taking the camera back from her and trying to turn it on, not sure if he fully understood what she was saying.

"It's has been subjected to some kind of energy burst. I will need to analyse the data, but from what I've seen, I would say it was a micro burst of some sort," she said thinking out loud.

Jack took the camera back. "Ianto," he said out loud looking around for him and ran off towards him. "Ianto was holding the camera," he shouted back at Tosh.

Ianto stood with back to one of the massive stones on the far right hand sides looking out at the hills in the distance, from the clouds massing it would be raining soon. He had come to loathe this place, every time they came out here something happened. First was all those photographs. Then he fell and hurt himself, he grabbed the back of his neck. The third time they had come back to finish mapping the stones he had gotten a violent headache, so bad it felt like his brain was on fire . He leaned back into the rock, and this time his tentative hopes had been dashed. 'But Jack was never a real possibility' he told himself 'so why did he feel like he did? What the hell was the matter with him?' He saw Jack on his way over he took a deep breath and braced himself in an effort to control how he was feeling.

"I'm sorry," he said as Jack joined him not quite sure he could explain his behaviour in a way that would not further embarrass himself.

"Sorry about what?," Jack asked not sure what Ianto had to apologise for.

"Sorry I stormed off," Ianto replied.

"Are you Ok?", Jack asked, relived to see that Ianto didn't look as if what had ever occurred had affected him. He was about to add something more but stopped as he saw the look on his face.

"Look I'm having a rough day, I just need some time to myself," he added looking at the hills not trusting he could look at Jack and keep his feelings in check.

"Ok ,is there anything I can help with?" he asked as he saw Ianto close his eyes, swallow and shake his head.

"I need some time to myself," Ianto added after a few moments his voice clearly shaking.

Jack took a breath to respond when Ianto spoke again, "Please Jack."

"I just wanted to see you were Ok," he said in reply.

"Please," he asked again a tinge of desperation edging his voice, as he did he felt Jack's hand on his arm.

"Tosh and I will finish up , we'll call you when we are ready to go," he said gently them moved away.

He nodded not sure he could fully trust his voice to reply and looked into the distance trying to work through the turmoil of emotions that flooded through him. He tried to organise his thoughts, but found it was impossible to even try. He placed his hand over the spot Jack had touched him and let out a long sigh and closed his eyes.

-@-

Jack watched with Tosh as Ianto drove away. As the car turned the corner Jack headed back to his apartment. Tosh could see that Jack was upset, as he opened his apartment he, moved to sofa at the end and pulled his legs up and put his arms around his knees ,his head on his knees and broke down.

Tosh closed the door. Not knowing what else to do she knelt next to him and put her arms around him. As she did he broke into deep sobs. Several long minutes passed before Jack composed himself. Finally he lifted his head and wiped his face dry with his sleeve.

"I am not sure how much more of this I can take," he said his voice shaking. "I sit in that office everyday and I see something is wrong, he's thin, he looks exhausted. I have no idea what's going on for him and today, when I saw the look on his face when he thought...," he struggled to speak.

"I am so sorry Jack, I wasn't thinking," Tosh said as Jack put his hand out and she took it in hers.

"What am I going to do Tosh if I can't make this right?" He asked her. "Do you know what my biggest fear is? It's that the damage is so deep it's irreparable. What if it's not just his memories? What if he can never move forward with anyone? What if I am responsible for destroying any hope he has of ever being able to form meaningful relationships?"

He took a deep breath and looked at her. "I'd walk away right now if I knew he could find real happiness with someone else. I would bear it because he deserves that in his life. He deserves to be loved," he wiped his face and looked at the ceiling. "To see that look on his face today, knowing he thought I would not find him worthy, "he sighed. "The truth is Tosh I am not worthy of him," he said adamantly.

"Jack". Tosh commanded. "Look at me." He turned his face towards her surprised at her tone.

"What if, today his questions are a positive sign Ianto is making progress. I saw him hesitate today, but it didn't stop him asking. The first steps when you are interested in someone is to ask those questions. You're checking things out, finding more information, seeing if you can follow up on how you feel. "

She took a breath. "There is something you need to know, you talk about the look on his face, well I saw a look too, when I said one particular word."

Jack turned and blinked at her puzzled as she spoke.

"That one word was him," she said and she noted Jack straighten a little.

"If I recall correctly, he asked about family, yours. I said you were on your own, that you had someone in the past, and you were devastated when you lost him. Oh he tried to hide it but for a split second I saw hope," she continued.

"Ianto doesn't remember you come from the future where people no longer have," she paused as she recalled the phrase she was looking for. "What did you call them, quaint little categories, he lives in a world where there are." She looked at Jack directly. "I bet Ianto has moved internal mountains to ask those questions. It may be he's worked up the courage to speak because he has developed feelings for you and wants to find out if can act on them. How would it be if he made a pass at his boss and found himself out of a job or slapped with a sexual harassment suit or had his lights punched out?"

"And if you want the truth, from the look on his face it looked to me like one more hurdle had been overcome." she said finally.

Jack turned and pulled Tosh onto the sofa with him and put his arms around her. "Tosh, you are wonderful," he said as he kissed her forehead.

"Don't give up hope, not yet and I will have a word with him, you wait and see" she said.

"And tomorrow," she added "we need to work out what happened out at that henge."

***

Summary: Jack has returned from his time with the Doctor. In his absence Ianto has disappeared. An investigation has uncovered a single powerful dose of Retcon is missing. What will happen when Jack returns and finds Ianto is missing?



chapter 17

"What happened yesterday?" Jack asked as he sat at his desk he turning the camera over in his hand.

"I am not sure," Tosh told him truthfully.

"I need answers," he told her.

"What did you see happen?" she asked him.

"I was watching Ianto," he admitted unashamedly. " I glanced down at the chart, when I looked up he was literally frozen on the spot, after a few moments he staggered , dropped the camera, then he caught his balance," he explained.

"Let me show you the data," she advised as she sat at Ianto's desk and pulled up the programme which showed the energy spike. The screen filled with the representation of the henge the sensors showing the exact epicentre of the energy spike.

"As you can see it's not a general burst, it was very specific to the exact location Ianto was standing," she indicated at the screen.

"So what you are telling me is that while Ianto was standing on that spot, there was, what? " He asked then recalled what she had stated the day before , "a micro burst?"

"It was more than that, it was a single extremely powerful focused micro burst of energy," she advised as she looked at Jack.

"Magnetic energy, right?" Jack stated trying to make sense of the information. "That's what the sensors are designed to pick up," as he spoke he saw Tosh shake her head.

"From what I could discern from my scanner yesterday I would have to say no," she replied

"What! But that's the kind of energy signature the sensors are designed to register," Jack stuttered.

"Absolutely, all I can say is there was energy picked up by the sensors, but it was not magnetic," She replied. 'It has a different signature, like colours; for example red and a variation of red could still be called red. The best I could say is that it's close but not the same, variations on a theme."

"Then what?" he asked baffled.

"Jack I have no idea" she replied honestly. Jack sat back in concern and picked up the camera and held it out to Tosh who walked across and took it from him.

"This camera is ruined , you said yesterday every electrical connection had been disrupted. That sounds like a burst of electromagnetic radiation," Jack commented. "Maybe that's what the UNIT satellite picked up: a low energy EMP event," he added.

"This was not an EMP event," Tosh replied emphatically. "If it had been every electrical device within a wide area would have been disrupted."

"You said it was focused. If it was focused then its effects would be restricted." He saw Tosh shake her head as he spoke.

"The burst was focused ,but extremely powerful. I mean if this had been an EMP as focused as this was, I calculated last night that every electrical device with a two kilometre radius would have been affected, including our watches and the car." Jack looked instinctually at his watch and it was still working.

"Secondly," Tosh continued as she took out her scan . "An EMP leaves no residual energy. It occurs, that's it, and it's over. " She put her scanner over the camera and showed the results to Jack.

"See the energy is still there fading away very gradually," she added as Jack looked at her.

"Not just the camera, Ianto as well," she admitted seeing the look of shock on his face.

"What?", he demanded sitting bolt upright.

"I scanned Ianto on the way back, as he was driving, that burst of energy went through him as well".

"Why didn't you tell me this yesterday?" He demanded,

"Well he stalked off and we were focused on the camera, you went to check on him," she took a breath. "You were not in exactly a communicative mood, during the ride back, neither of you said a word, and as I could see he had come to no obvious harm," she took another quick breath. "In truth, I didn't think of it until we were on the ride back. I got to thinking that as he was holding the camera the pulse might have gone through him so I scanned him."

"And?" Jack asked concerned.

"The same energy signature was there dissipating at the same rate as the camera." she replied.

"You know I don't think this has anything to do with the camera," she said thinking out loud.

Jack blinked "What?" he burst out his thoughts focused on Ianto as he thought he should go and check on him.

"You know, something happened in this office the day before yesterday. At the time, I thought nothing of it." Tosh got up and began to pace in an effort to order her thoughts.

"One of the sensors registered a reading. That's right, it was the one he had turned on ,carried around then put on his desk, at the time I thought it just needed calibrating, but I wonder," she said to herself.

"Explain?" he asked not sure what she was talking about.

"I was showing you both the equipment. I turned on the main data collector, then went back to setting up the laptop, to demonstrate how to download the information, when it showed up on the main system there was a anomaly at the time I thought" she said thinking out loud.

Jack interrupted her "In plain English."

"Oh sorry, Ianto was handling one of the sensors and turned it on. When he did it registered the same energy as yesterday. It was at a level the sensor could detect," she said looking at the confused look on Jacks face.

"Has anything strange happened while you've both been at the henge?" she asked him changing the subject.

"Strange in what way?" He asked not sure where she was going with her questions.

"Involving Ianto?" She queried.

"Strange involving Ianto, "he repeated now thoroughly confused. Then he recalled the photographs Ianto had taken on their first visit and how had opened up to him, which considering how reticent he had been up until that point it had been a little unusual.

"Kinda, not really," he struggled to reply. "Nothing I could say for definite".

Tosh raised an eyebrow "Think Jack?" She commanded.

Jack took a breath, "There was a reason why he was taking photographs yesterday , and he was replacing the first set he took on our first visit. He told me he had accidently wiped them and needed to retake them," he explained.

"And that's not true?" Tosh asked as she observed Jack's reluctance in answering her question.

"Not exactly," Jack replied uncomfortably, the photographs were something Ianto would want anyone to know about.

"Anything else?" Tosh asked when she saw Jack was not going to reply.

"He had that accident, and a bad headache the last time," he replied after some thought.

"I wonder if this has happened to him before," Tosh asked thoughtfully as she looked at the concern on Jack face.

"Happened before ," Tosh repeated. "If he has enough residual energy to set off one of the sensors, then maybe I can work backwards using the data from yesterday," he voice trailed off as she stood deep in thought.

Jack watched bemused as she pulled out her lap top and began to do some calculations, about 20 minutes passed as he watched, finally she pulled her computer around.

"Well I've extrapolated backwards using the data from the sensor the day before yesterday and last night and I would say the last time this happened was." She turned the computer screen towards Jack as he took note of the date.

"Was that the date of the visit, when he got the bad headache?" She asked as she saw him nod.

"How bad was it?" she asked him.

"Bad enough he made no protest when I offered to drive him home in his Audi," Jack advised.

"That must have been one hell of a headache." Tosh stated stunned that Ianto had allowed anyone to drive his car.

"Yeah first and last time I'll get to drive it," Jack replied wistfully.

"I think Ianto has been pinged," Tosh stated categorically.

'Pinged." Jack repeated surprised at her statement. "That's not very scientific Tosh."

"Alright then, something, unnamed has directed a powerful extremely, narrow, focused burst of unidentified energy at him," she explained. "As I said pinged and pinged at least twice, maybe every time you visited."

Jack stuttered "Is it dangerous?" He asked as visions of Ianto being hurt came to him.

"I don't think so," Tosh said thoughtfully.

"How can you be sure?" Jack challenged.

"We can't be sure without doing a full work up on him, but if I had to say, I would say no," she postulated.

"Again, how can you be so certain?" he asked.

"Has he come to any harm, as far as you are aware?" Tosh asked. "You spend the most time with him you would know."

"Not on the surface from what I can tell," he added thinking.

"I think it might be a good idea to get Owen up here and check him out just in case," she advised as she saw Jack nod in agreement.

Tosh picked up the camera, " You know the energy disrupted the electrical connections," she said as she saw Jack also making the connection.

"We need to get Owen up here ASAP" Jack stated.

"You know this might not be the first time this has happened" she said quietly thinking.

"You said that he might have been pinged each time we have visited," he said.

"No I meant to others," she said.

"Others, you mean other people who have visited," he said.

"Do you know what I think," Tosh said thinking about the information she had given Ianto when she had visited just after his accident. " I think it's about time we took note of what the local legends and history are around this landmark."

"Do you know what I think?" Jack repeated her statement . "We need to get Ianto in here now."

"Agreed," Tosh replied as she saw Jack pull out his cell phone.

"I need see he's ok and you can also have that word," he indicated to Tosh as he heard Ianto answer his phone.

-@-

Jack watched as Ianto walked into the room. He always marvelled at how Ianto maintained his standard at dress but today Ianto looked more than a little dishevelled. He was wearing faded jeans and a black tee shirt covered with a hoodie. The black shirt highlighted how pale and tired he looked. But he was relieved to see Ianto did not appear to have been outwardly affected by the events of the day before.

"I'm sorry, I know it's a Saturday, but Tosh and I were having a discussion, when she recalled you had done a lot of work on the local history surrounding the henge," Jack explained.

"Looks like you had a rough night, you up for this?" Jack asked seeing the dark look Ianto gave him.

Ianto looked at Jack.

'No I'm bloody well not up for this,' he thought. 'I was perfectly content lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling, contemplating the misery of my existence. I've had no real sleep for weeks. My nights are filled with the most horrible nightmares. Last night I dreamed I was bound up like some kind of animal being slaughtered as my throat was being cut and I woke up screaming.

Because of this I haven't eaten properly for weeks and I am surviving on a combination of coffee, caffeinated sodas with the odd dry cracker thrown in. And if truth be known if you didn't take me out to dinner once a week I would have starved to death by now.

I'm terrified you might disappear again at any moment like you did before, but this time you won't be back. I have no explanation for the why I feel this way, I just do

I think I have fallen in love with my boss. Yesterday I found out that there is no chance for me not even in the slightest degree because he has already found someone.

But I'll smile and pretend that everything is ok because that what expected of me.

"What can I help you with- Sir" Ianto replied.

Jack winced as he heard Ianto call him sir. He hated it when Ianto hid behind a mask of obsequiousness as the perfect assistant and was clear indication that he was as unhappy as he looked.

He put one hand on Ianto's chest and the other on his back. "I am sorry but this is important we really need your help," He added

"When I was last here I gave you some whole of journal articles I had found out about the local area stories and such. " Tosh reminded him as he sat down at his desk. "From what Jack tells me you have created an extensive data base of all the local legends.

"I wouldn't say all, " Ianto replied as tiny edge of a smile lifted his face. "I'm still waiting for some information from the British Library."

"Can you give us a summation of what you learnt?" Jack asked.

Ianto moved over to the filing cabinet and pulled out several files. "Where would you like to start?" he asked.

"Let's start with the oldest and work forwards?" Tosh suggested helpfully .

He threw the files on to his desk top. "Let me at least get some coffee on then I will start with the most interesting," he added.

Several hours passed as Ianto began with another noted tale.

"It's been noted and even I agree with this, that the arrangement of stones look like the iris of an eye," Ianto said as handed both Tosh and Jack a diagram. "This ties up with the idea that the henge is the eye of a sleeping dragon. It is said that if the dragon ever awakes it will eat the stars."

"Another one around the same theme, is about a race of dragons who lived in the stars, one dragon in particular when rogue and began to devour planets. As the planets were inhabited this was upsetting to everyone. So it was trapped here by a group of other dragons for all eternity. The stones around the outside representing the bars of a cage."

"However the most detailed legend and held as local knowledge by the locals and where it gets its name comes for an old English epic poem which was first transcribed from an old manuscript in the 1700's. This transcription was itself taken from a much more ancient document from approximately 900CE and was noted as coming from an oral tradition that goes much further back. What is strange is the 900CE transcription was done at the insistence of the Founding Abbot at local monastery. It was lost during the time of Henry the VIII when the monasteries were disbanded. It was rediscovered hidden in one of the crypts at the local church in Emindale sealed in a lead box." He took a drink of his now cold coffee and continued

"It runs to around 200 verses so I'll summarise," Ianto added as he saw the look on Jack's face, " There was Heaven, where those who lived among the stars dwelt. Many Gods lived here among the stars."

"There were many different kinds of Gods and a disagreement broke out between two of them. And a war began in Heaven. It went on eons and eons and both sides became the destroyers of worlds. Eventually it went on for so long neither side could remember what they were fighting about. Each side was evenly matched so sometimes one side won, then the other. In between those who lived under the heavens suffered the most."

"Even though the true cause of the war was lost, both sides fought themselves to ruin, but neither side would give in. Eventually both sides were on the point of annihilation, both having constructed weapons that would win the war by destroying the other.

On both sides there were those that saw the coming genocide and decided to act. They were called the wise brothers and wise sisters."

"They stole one of the terrible weapons and hid it in a place neither side could find and sent an ultimatum, stop fighting or we will destroy everyone from both sides, nothing will remain, not even a memory. Only the fanatics wanted to keep fighting and it was the lesser Gods on both sides who overthrew them, Then both sides came together and worked towards peace. All the terrible weapons on both sides were destroyed except one."

"There were such differences between the two races of Gods that a war could break out in the future. So it was decided that the one weapon stolen by the six beings would remain hidden. Three beings from one side and three from the other chose to remain with the weapon for eternity keeping if safe. They lie, forever watching, ready to use the weapon to destroy both sides if a war starts again. According to the locals the three large stones on the left are called the three brothers the three big stones on the right are the three sisters."

"It goes on that the two sets of gods have now become one and the purpose of the weapon has been lost so it sits here waiting. Finally, there is a note added about a prophecy that in the future, an Immortal and the lonely God, will call on the sleeping brothers and sisters to assist in saving the universe from a great future evil. The locals call it the Eye of Emin; Emin meaning God."

"This is fascinating," Tosh commented as she jotted down notes.

"Just a couple more," Ianto added as he looked at his watch seeing it was now almost the middle of the afternoon.

"This one celebrated in the local village church at Emindale, " Ianto said as he handed them photocopy of stained glass window. "In medieval times there was a legend that this was the eye of a sleeping serpent hence the circle, that when it dreamed it would heal people especially children."

Jack looked up suddenly alert, as he also saw Tosh sit up. "Oh," he said.

"There was this small boy ,who had been born to a couple who thought they would never had children. However the child was born with no speech and was clearly slow. He had some affinity with animals wild or tame so he was put to work looking after the village sheep. One day while with the herd, he fell asleep at the stones. When he awoke, there had been a miracle. Before he couldn't speak a single word he now could take on a full conversation. At first the locals thought it was witchcraft but the boy could quote the bible word perfect. He went into holy orders starting up a local monastery whose work centred on healing the sick."

'Any dates around when this might have happened?" Jack asked.

"Well the monastery was set up around 920CE, so if you believe this then it could have been anytime around 880CE onwards," Ianto advised.

"Did it become a pilgrimage site for healing like other places in the middle ages?" Tosh asked

"Strangely no, there were no further documented healings so it just disappeared off the radar," Ianto advised. "Except for this " He handed Jack and Tosh photocopies from a news paper article from the 1920's. "This is a report from the local newspaper. A local family were denying rumours that their daughter who had been visiting the stones with her brother had started to speak. She had been diagnosed as a childhood schizophrenic and had stopped speaking some years before. Apparently according to the report she returned from the stones and slept for two days. When she awoke not only could she speak, she awoke with an abiding passion for numbers. She went on to influence modern ways of seeing the universe, but leading a normal life in every other way."

"I wonder how many more there were?" Tosh asked thinking out loud.

"Pardon? " Ianto commented not sure what she meant.

"Locals, like this family whose children were healed but who didn't want to draw attention to themselves."

"Tosh and I got talking last night. She has a theory that the stones have some other purpose that what appears on the surface," Jack advised cautiously.

"No doubt. " Ianto advised trying to keep the sarcasm from his voice. "That the whole mystery surrounding standing stones is no one knows why they were built or by who."

"You have to admit," Tosh pointed out, "it is in intriguing that this stones would appear to be taking an active role in healing people." She paused to order her thoughts. "I mean what is the criteria they use, how would they choose?" she added then saw the warning look on Jack's face. "Why some and not others..." she trailed off.

"So your saying you believe that the stones are somehow healing people ,children!" Ianto burst out.

"Yes. Why not, it's a valid hypothesis?" Tosh stated back.

"What? So there really is some kind of sky snake that lives under the ground choosing to heal people," Ianto snapped.

"Well something is going on," Tosh told him after a few seconds.

Ianto took a deep breath as he looked directly at Jack, "Look, I don't believe in miracles or happy endings. It's more likely the children were misdiagnosed or it was just simple co-incidence," he argued.

Seeing the look on Ianto's face he could swear he felt his heart actually ache. He stood up and looked at his watch it was 2.30 in the afternoon. "I think that's enough for now it's a lot to think about."

Ianto stood quickly. "Right, I'm off home." he said relieved he could finally escape back to his flat.

"Tosh and I were going out for a late lunch," Jack said in an effort to stop Ianto leaving.

"Please join us," Tosh piped in taking Jack's lead.

Ianto shook his head desperate to leave. "Look thanks and all that, but right now I'm not good company," he explained.

"My treat, I insist," she said as she saw him brace himself. "Look I would really like to thank you." She looked at Jack who was looking at her nodding at her trying to make sure she continued, "

for all the hard work you've done."

Jack watched as Ianto face smoothed into his nice mode the perfect mask as he hid his pain, smile and get on and endure.

Following behind Ianto it took every ounce of his control not to spin the man around take him into his arms.

-@-

Sitting down under the tree by the lake, Ianto sat watching the ducks throwing bits of his muffin at them taking the odd sip from his soda. It was a beautiful late summer afternoon, the trees shading the diners from its heat.

"What is it about ducks?" Tosh said trying to lighten the moment.

"They're greedy," Ianto said as he tossed another bit of his muffin at one of them.

"When I was little we had this park where we lived. My grandmother and I used to go there every Saturday to feed the ducks. She called them God's little mischief makers, always to making people laugh."

Jack smiled at her attempt to make conversation. He gave her ten out of ten for effort. At least they had got him here. He would wait a few moments and disappear for a short while, and Tosh could have her word.

As he threw another piece of the muffin looked up as he heard Tosh gasp.

"Oh no!" Tosh burst out as shrank down in an effort hide herself and put her face into her hands.

Ianto looked up, surprised at her actions saw a man heading towards her calling out her name.

"My little Toshiko, my little rose," his voice rang out as he pulled one her hands way from her face and kissed it.

There was a brief struggle and she snatched it away and stared angrily at him. As she did the man pulled up a chair next to Jack.

"Jack, here you are at last." He said as he looked between Jack and Ianto. "And I see your still playing lost and found." Ianto glanced between Jack and the strange man. Jack was sitting with his arms crossed a look of thunder on his face.

"What part are you up to Jack, the part where he's found? " The strange man studied Ianto then added, "No. By the look on his face he's still lost."

Ianto stared in open mouthed astonishment. He had thought Jack had been dressed theatrically when he first met him but he had nothing on this person. He looked like a gunfighter who was wearing a jacket that might be found in some 80's revival rock show. And those boots!

As he looked closer he looked like as if he was actually armed. He looked up across at Jack whose face was growing darker with every moment.

"John Hart." he said as he narrowed his eyes.

"Jack," he replied in the same tone. "Well isn't this pleasant, a nice Saturday by the side of the lake having lunch, oooh." John Hart took Ianto's glass and took a long sip, screwed up his face and looked at the contents.

"Is this what passes for a drink on this planet?" He said, as Ianto snatched his drink back. There was a brief tussle as some of soda spilled onto the grass. As he recovered the glass Ianto looked into the glass then back at John Hart.

"I remember this one time on Aterion 5 , Jack and I had this bender ,wow, there was this one being, he had 15 appendages and 7 orifices ... " he started to say conversationally.

"What do you want?" Jack interrupted glaring at him.

"A hello would be nice for a start big boy," John replied as he took a deep breath. "Do you know how hard it has been to track you down?"

"I had no desire for you to find me," Jack replied leaning forward now

"I remember when all you had for me was desire," John Hart replied rolling the word desire and raising his eyebrows up and down.

Jack stood up and pointed towards the trees. "Move" he commanded.

"Oh my Toshiko," John Hart said as he stood up. "I will never forget those fabulous weeks the earth or should I say the universe shifted on it axis," he blew her big a kiss.

"MOVE," Jack shouted at him as he grabbed John Hart's arm and began dragging him towards the trees by the pathway next to the cafe.

"What did he mean nothing but desire for him?" Ianto asked as he watched them move away unable to tear his eyes away at the spectacle of John Hart being led away by the elbow by Jack.

"It's complicated," she advised taking a quick sip of her drink to steady herself. "John Hart and the Captain were partners, lovers." she explained as Ianto jerked his head around to look at her.

"In what way lovers!" he burst out startled at her revelation.

"In every way," she struggled to explain.

"But I thought, he just said you and him," Ianto sputtered as he saw her turn a deep red.

"Yes. Yes "She swallowed, "I had a temporary lapse of good judgement". She tried to explain.

"I wouldn't call weeks temporary," Ianto stated. He was about to add more but stopped when he saw the look on her face.

"But you said him and the captain," Ianto said reeling at the events and revelations of the past few moments.

"The problem is" Tosh said realising this was her moment to set the record straight. "They were in the past, but they're not now. I mean Jack's not interested in him". She added quickly, "Look yesterday I know I said Jack had found someone special, but I should have made myself clear. " She paused "It's you!" she said in a heavy whisper.

"Me!," Ianto said startled.

"Yes," she whispered. "He would never want you to know I told you this Ianto, but he secretly has feelings for you."

"Has he said so?" he stammered.

"Not in so many words, but I've known, look...he's not said anything because he's not certain you would be interested in him."

She stopped as she saw Jack return with what she could swear was a split lip.

He looked at Ianto and Tosh, it would appear he had interrupted something, Tosh was biting her lower lip and Ianto... Ianto was looking at him and by the look Tosh had said something. Good. Tosh had set the record straight he was on his own and looking, he smiled at Ianto, looking at him right now.

"You Ok?" he said to Ianto.

Wide eyed and blinking Ianto struggled to order his thoughts "Yeah, yeah" he stuttered "I, I think I'm, I'm about as good an Ok as I have been for some time."

"Good." Jack said taking up his sandwich and taking a bite he winced slightly as filling stung his lip.

-@-

Jack dragged John Hart through the trees to a place where they could not been seen from the cafe.

"What do you want?" Jack asked.

"I thought I would come and check out your new domestic situation," he said "how's it working out there, lover boy figured it out yet."

"Leave him out of this" Jack said fury in every word at the mention of Ianto.

"You used to take better care of your lovers." John remarked . " He's pretty cute, you know if it doesn't work out, maybe him and me," he paused, "you know there are things he and I could do that would ensure he would never forget me."

"Go anywhere near him and I can't guarantee your safety," Jack replied steel in his voice.

"I remember when you felt like that about me," John said.

"What do you want?" Jack interrupted his arms crossed.

"I met your little team, team Torchwood, they're doing very well without you. Tosh was a most incredible distraction, wow who would have thought..." he stopped as he saw the look on Jacks face

"You were explaining what you wanted," he interrupted.

"I wonder if tea boy , oh that was his nick name wasn't it" John said sarcastically, "can ever give you what we had once?"

"Don't ever let me hear you refer to him as that ever again," Jack said through his teeth.

"Whoa did I hit a raw nerve," he said as he stepped back wards as Jack took a step towards him.

" Lost boy, then", John retorted as he saw Jack launch himself at him. "You used to have better taste," he said as he threw a fist as Jack collided with him.

"Not from what I can see," Jack grunted has he floored John.

"Is that it?" Jack asked as he stood up over John. "You've found me mission accomplished."

"You could leave all this," John said with an almost desperate edge to his voice as he felt his ribs. "Come with me, the fun we could have," he offered.

"I have unfinished business," Jack said looking back towards the lake.

"Ah love, I remember it well, I hope it works out for you" he replied as he pulled out his wrist strap and began to disappear.

"Oh by the way, I found your brother" he said as he vanished.

"Gray" Jack cried out in surprise.

-@-

This can't be right,' Ianto said to himself, as he laid in bed trying tried to make sense of the swirl of jumbled, mixed up thoughts that raced through his mind.

'You'

'What the hell was Tosh talking about'? He might have secret desires for the Captain thanks to a recent revelation, which he admitted explained a lot of the content of his dreams, well the enjoyable ones anyway.

And what the hell had John Hart meant by playing lost and found and by the look on his face he was still lost?

Jack and John Hart!

John Hart and Tosh!

This would take some serious thinking to work out.

What did he mean on this planet, and that outfit? The man looked like a reject from a bad science fiction convention. Well maybe that explained the comment.

He didn't get it; this was like one of those chaotic dreams that plagued him.

He secretlyhas feelings for you, isn't that what she had said. Wouldn't that be ironic if Jack was lying right now thinking him about him, while he was here thinking about Jack. He pulled his hand though his hair and let out a deep breath.

She must be mistaken; he couldn't even begin to imagine someone like Jack would be interested in someone like him.

He knew he desired Jack plain and simple. He filled his senses, he loved being around him. 'Truth was there was nothing plain and simple about all this, he told himself, 'you've had fallen in love with your boss.'

'He secretly has feelings for you' he recalled how his heart had leapt in his chest when Tosh has spoken those words. You know Tosh has known him, a lot longer than he had. No, Tosh was being nice, no matter what he might feel, Jack would not be interested he was sure.

Jack was a friend, a good friend, first real friend he had had since Lisa. He took a deep breath let's just think about this for a moment, you found out Jack was on his own, Jack had lost someone important and has now found someone special,

'YOU'

The one thing he hated about all this was feeling of hope that had surged through him when she had spoken. 'Look,' he told himself 'you were incredibly lucky, you found Lisa, the time you had together was short , but someone loved you and you loved them.' Even in his wildest dreams he couldn't image he could be so lucky to have someone like Jack in his life. He should be grateful for what was.

He turned over onto his back; he wished Tosh had not said a word. He was a nobody, nothing, someone like Jack wouldn't look twice at. And he hated that her words had for a fleeting moment, had given him the hope that there might be the faint possibility, that Jack might feel something for him.

God, if only he knew for sure. If he knew for sure, he would...'Yeah what would you do", he asked himself as felt swept apart by his feelings, 'well it would start with a kiss', and he heard a voice in is head say. And he felt his breath catch as he imagined his lips on Jacks, oh to taste him Lisa had told him he tasted all sweet and salty at the same time. He wondered if Jack tasted like that.

There were other things he had quite a list he would just love to pull out and unbutton that shirt, undo that belt buckle, run his down and feel...'.'What did another man' erect penis feel like' he thought "bloody nice" he heard a voice in head say. If his dreams were any guide you could grasp each other's as the same time and... He turned over on his front.

Had he ever wanted Lisa this much, he tried to recall. Sort of, he had loved her, they had made love. But he couldn't recall the same intensity of sheer lust he felt for this man. If only, if only he knew for sure, he turned back over on this his back, wild dreams that's all he had. Sometimes he wished that horrible creature from his nightmares would tear him apart for real. He turned over again and saw the time on his clock was 4.34 am he let out a deep sigh as another image came to him this time of Jack on his knees, his mouth on his ..., groaning he got out of bed and headed for the shower.

***

Next part of Heart and Soul.

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