Title: Photographs & Memories
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Ianto Jones/Tenth Doctor
Fandom: Torchwood/Doctor Who
Rating: PG
Table: 20_est_relships
Prompt: 20, Memories
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own Ianto Jones or the Tenth Doctor. Please do not sue.

***

Ianto turned the pages of the photo album he'd been keeping; it was hard to believe that it had filled up so quickly. So many memories of his life -- as it had been before the advent of Torchwood in his life, and after. The past melding into the present -- which would lead to the future.

He turned rapdily past the pictures of Lisa, and of people he'd known before he'd come to work for Torchwood. That was the distant past, something he didn't want to linger on. It was part of who he was, but it wasn't what he wanted to concentrate on now.

There were several pictures of Jack and the rest of the Torchwood team a bit further into the album -- and a few pictures of Jack alone, taken when he'd been in a contemplative mood. Pictures of Jack were few and far between, and Ianto considered himself lucky to have some of them.

The immortal didn't dislike being photographed, as far as Ianto knew -- he simply never took the time to stay still long enough to allow himself to be captured in pictures. And when they'd been together, Ianto had never seemed to have a camera at the appropriate moments.

But that was also a part of his past, and another thing that he didn't want to sentimentalize over. His past was a large part of what had made him the person he was -- but it needed to be put away and only looked back on when he wanted to relive those memories.

That wasn't what he wanted to do now. No, he was more interested in the recent past -- the time of his life when he'd felt happier than he'd ever have dreamed possible.

He'd been flipping through the pages of the photo album fairly quickly, smiling a little at some of the memories they conjured up, but putting them out of the forefront of mind as soon as they'd appeared. The pictures he wanted to see were further back in the album, ones that he'd just put there a few days ago.

Ianto's hands slowed, not flipping so quickly through the pages now. His fingertips touched the protective cover over the picture that, for him, marked the beginning of this phase of his life, a faint smile on his lips as his eyes settled on the photograph in front of him.

The Doctor hadn't known that Ianto was aiming a camera at him when the picture had been taken; he was standing on the balcony of this very flat, looking out at the bay of Cardiff. Ianto couldn't help but wonder what he'd been thinking, just what the melancholy expression on his face meant.

Had he been thinking about Gallifrey, and his life there? Had he been seeing, not the panoramic view in front of him, but something very different that no one else had seen? Had he been reliving some memory from his own distant past, something that Ianto couldn't share?

It didn't really matter, did it? He'd managed to capture the Doctor in a way that he rarely saw his lover -- at rest, thinking, not in constant motion as he usually was. It was a side of the Time Lord that he enjoyed looking at.

Not that he didn't love the Doctor exactly the way he was, Ianto told himself hastily. But sometimes .... it was nice to see the man he loved in a quiet mood.

Still, he wouldn't change the Doctor, not for any reason, he thought fondly, smiling again as he flipped to the next page of the photo album. Himself and the Doctor, a picture that Tosh had snapped only a few weeks ago. They looked so happy together.

Strange how he could feel so utterly happy and completely content, just from his lover's presence. He hadn't even been doing anything particularly important that day -- just sitting in his office, filling out some rather routine paperwork. A boring day, really.

And then -- the Doctor had made an unexpected appearance in the office, and his entire day had brightened. Suddenly, everything seemed easier to do, the minutes sped by instead of dragging themselves out, and he'd felt that he .... belonged.

The Doctor's presence always had that effect on him, he thought, leaning back and closing his eyes for a moment. There was something about the Time Lord that made Ianto feel .... he frowned slightly, searching for the proper expression. He couldn't quite bring a word to mind.

Loved? Needed? Wanted? No, it was more than that. It was all of those things -- but those words weren't the sum total of how he felt. There was more to how he felt than those few words -- much, much more.

But the words to describe his emotions didn't really matter. The important thing was that he felt them -- and that the Doctor knew how he felt. The Time Lord didn't seem to need words to tell him what Ianto was feeling; he always seemed to sense just what was in the young man's heart.

He'd never had a relationship like that before, Ianto mused, not even with Jack. He'd never been with anyone who could reach into his heart and soul and divine his feelings without having those emotions laid out in black and white. But then, the Doctor was someone special.

Ianto looked back down at the photo album, flipping a few more pages and smiling at the memories the pictures evoked. He and the Doctor standing by the Tardis .... the Doctor with all of the Torchwood team .... the Doctor sitting in that chair only a few feet away from him, reading a book.

He studied each picture, savoring the memories they all brought. It would be something to look back on in his old age, he thought, smiling to himself. All these pictures of the years gone by -- and hopefully he'd still be able to remember each and every one.

Would the Doctor still be young and beautiful then? Ianto didn't doubt that he would. He had the feeling that even though he himself would age, the Time Lord would still look just the way he did now -- just as beautiful and desirable as he'd been on the day they'd first met.

He sighed, not wanting to think that far into the future. It wasn't something that he needed to brood on, not now when he wanted to look at these photos and think about happy memories.

There would time enough later to think about the possibilities of what could happen as he grew older -- the Doctor could get tired of him, their relationship could falter and fizzle out. Any number of things could happen. He might not grow old with the Time Lord by his side.

No. That was something he definitely didn't want to contemplate. A world without the Doctor wasn't a world that he ever wanted to be a part of. Even if they weren't together, he couldn't bear to think of the man he loved no longer existing somewhere in the universe.

Those morbid thoughts would get him nowhere, Ianto told himself firmly, mentally shutting the door on those ideas and pushing them away from him. He and the Doctor would have many long years together. He was going to make sure of that, to the best of his ability.

As though his thoughts of the Time Lord had somehow brought the other man to his side, the Doctor came into the room, approaching the couch and looking over Ianto's shoulder. The young man leaned back, craning his neck to look up at his lover with an affectionate smile on his face.

"Pulling out the photo album?" the Doctor asked, quirking one eyebrow in question as his gaze rested on the book opened on Ianto's lap. "It looks as though you're having a bit of a trip down memory lane. No wonder you've been so quiet in here."

Ianto nodded, blushing a little. "I .... wanted to look back over the times we've had together. I don't know why; it just somehow felt like something I needed to do."

"There's nothing wrong with that. Sometimes we all need to relive the happy moments in our lives," the Doctor said softly, moving around to the front of the couch and sitting down beside Ianto, resting his head on his lover's shoulder. "I don't think I've seen some of these. Care to show them to me?"

"I'd love to," Ianto told him, sliding one arm around the Time Lord's waist and flipping back to the earlier pages of the album, smiling as he did so.

It was time he shared his memories with the man he loved. And, in time, he was sure that the two of them would fill this book with more memories that they'd be able to look back at together.

***