Title: Growing up is hard to do
By: lilithangel
Pairings: gen
Rating: G
Series: 1) Jack could totally take Wonder Woman
Summary: a while back I wrote a couple of stories that had Owen and Ianto mentally regressed into children. I let them grow up pretty quickly but now I want to let them stay younger for longer. First Owen is twelve and Ianto is ten. They still have their Torchwood memories; they are just filtered through the minds of children instead of adults.

***


“What’s wrong?” Owen said to Ianto who was vigorously wiping his face with the handkerchief Jack had given him.

“I don’t like it here anymore,” Ianto whispered, “I want to go home.”

They had been let out of the cells under promise of best behaviour, although Owen had crossed his fingers behind his back. Now the two men were slumped on the sofa watching the other three work.

They were physically adult sized but still mentally young and Jack wasn’t prepared to let them out of the Hub.

“I don’t,” Owen said, “it’s much cooler here.” He kicked his feet against the sofa.

“My mum would make biscuits and hot chocolate,” Ianto said, picking at the pizza Gwen had ordered them.

“Really?” Owen said with surprise, “not out of a packet?”

“From scratch,” Ianto said proudly, “she lets me stir the mix too.”

Owen looked wistful at the thought and then shook his head. “I’m bored,” he said, scanning the room with the experienced eye of the terminally bored.

Jack was shut up in his office and Gwen was on the phone to someone at UNIT. Tosh was fully caught up in a computer program and nobody was looking at them.

“What are you doing?” Ianto hissed as Owen stood up quietly.

“Going to explore,” Owen said, “there’s tons of stuff down below that we’ve never seen. Come on,” he whispered, “while they’re not watching.”

Ianto dithered about getting into trouble, but he was bored too. Somehow he knew Jack wouldn’t let him go home and he knew too that his family wouldn’t know how to react to him. He gave in to the hopeful entreaty in Owen’s eyes and got up carefully.

They slipped into the tunnels without being seen and headed for the lower levels. Ianto didn’t want to go to the cells where the Weevils were, they scared him. Owen didn’t mind, he didn’t like them much either.

Ianto led the way through the archives with more confidence, even when Owen disappeared and jumped out at him with a roar.

“When did you stop being scared?” Owen said when his trick didn’t work.

“I like it down here,” Ianto said simply.

“Why?” Owen looked around the dank passages. “Okay it’s pretty cool and dungeon-like, but you’re such a fusspot.”

“Am not,” Ianto pouted.

“Are too,” Owen insisted, “you even dress like one.”

“Well you look like a hobo,” Ianto said with a sniff. “Why doesn’t your mum dress you better?”

“Don’t talk about my mum.” Owen shoved Ianto.

“I don’t like you,” Ianto said, shoving Owen back.

“I don’t like you either,” Owen shouted. He turned and fled down the corridor.

Ianto watched Owen go, his lower lip trembling. The familiar cabinets and corridors weren’t so comforting without Owen beside him.

“Owen,” he called out, “Owen, I’m sorry, please come back.” He hurried in the direction Owen had gone.

Rounding a corner Ianto nearly fell over Owen who was crouched against the wall.

“Go away,” Owen said, looking at his feet.

“I’m sorry Owen, I didn’t mean to be mean,” Ianto said, sliding down to sit next to him.

“You’re just lucky you’ve got a mother who cooks you biscuits and stuff,” Owen mumbled.

“Your mother doesn’t?” Ianto was shocked at the idea. His world had always had a mother who cooked and a father who took him for walks in the weekend; it was a shock to know that other parents didn’t.

“She’s busy with work and stuff,” Owen said, “it’s not that she doesn’t want to or anything,” he insisted, biting hard on his lip.

Ianto bit his own lip thoughtfully and patted Owen awkwardly on the shoulder. Owen flinched at the touch and Ianto pulled away.

“I wonder what’s down here.” Owen said after a moment, “there could be monsters or treasure or anything.”

“What sort of treasure?” Ianto said, his eyes lighting up.

“Anything really,” Owen said, “Torchwood’s been here forever. It could have been built over a Roman fort or an alien ship or anything.”

“What if we get lost?” Ianto said nervously, “we’re getting close to where I’ve never been.”

“We could use string, or leave marks on the wall,” Owen said excitedly.

“Have you got some?” Ianto said.

Owen hunted through his pockets and pulled out a short piece of string, along with two pens, untwisted paperclips and a packet of post-it notes. “Not going to be enough,” Owen said in disappointment.

“We could use the sticky notes,” Ianto said, “put arrows on them and stick them to the wall. Then we could follow them back and pick them up.”

“Cool,” Owen said in admiration. He shoved the paperclips and the string back in his pocket and handed Ianto one of the pens.

* * * * *

Upstairs Gwen had become suspicious of the silence and discovered their disappearance. Jack flicked through CCTV just in time to see two figures disappear into the lower levels.

“I’ll fetch them,” Jack said with resignation. “How long till they grow up again?” he said to Tosh.

“At this point either twelve hours or twelve years,” Tosh said with a groan.

“Not twelve years, please not that long,” Jack begged her.

Tosh laughed, “I’m working on it,” she promised.

Jack headed for the archives, determined not to let either Owen or Ianto get to him. It was hard to reconcile the adult bodies with the child minds, especially when Owen’s mind was still as sharp as razors and Ianto’s eidetic memory recalled things guaranteed to make Jack wince.

When he found the first of the post-it notes he had to grin even as he realised what direction they were heading. Each note had an arrow directing him to where they had gone. They alternated between carefully drawn with exactly matching arms, and big blocks with flared arms and off centre points.

He could hear voices down the corridor. Hushed and excited tones were discussing which door to open next. There was a lot of things down in the lower levels that nobody but Jack remembered even existed, and a lot that Jack was happy never to see the light of day, let alone the gaze of two man-children like Owen and Ianto.

He heard the words “I wonder what this does?” too late to do more than dash around a corner in time for a flash of light to blind him. When the spots cleared Jack saw Owen and Ianto sitting next to an open box looking guilty and trying not to cry.

“Are you two alright?” Jack said with concern.

“We didn’t touch anything,” Owen said defensively.

“We’re sorry,” Ianto said at the same time.

“You could have gotten hurt,” Jack scolded. He looked into the box to find an alien equivalent of a flash grenade. It was lying next to several more deadly grenades. “Upstairs the pair of you,” he ordered, angry and terrified at how close they’d been to really being hurt.

“You’re mean,” Owen said, kicking him in the shins and running off.

“We didn’t mean to do anything wrong,” Ianto said, his eyes welling with tears, “and you shouldn’t be mean to Owen.” Ianto turned and walked away with more dignity until he reached the corner and then he dashed off but not before Jack heard a choked back sob.

Feeling like the worst heel in the universe Jack headed back, grateful that at least they were following the post-it notes back and not running blindly deeper into the tunnels.

When he reached the Hub Owen was sitting stony-faced on the sofa with Ianto sitting next to him. Gwen and Tosh were fussing around them and looked accusingly at Jack when he walked up to them.

Jack ignored the girls and knelt down in front of Owen and Ianto. “Do you understand how dangerous it could be down there? You might have found something worse than a flash bang.”

“You didn’t have to yell at us,” Owen said sullenly, backed up by Ianto’s wounded look.

“I was scared,” Jack said and they both looked at him in surprise.

“You don’t get scared,” Owen said firmly.

“Yes I do,” Jack said.

“What scares you?” Ianto said curiously.

“Any of you being hurt scares me,” Jack said seriously.

Owen considered him carefully and nodded but Ianto was still frowning.

“You never said sorry,” Ianto said.

“I’m sorry,” Jack said gravely. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Didn’t scare me,” Owen said, “you were mean.”

“Then I’m sorry for being mean,” Jack corrected. He staggered back at an unexpected armful of Ianto.

Ianto wrapped his arms around Jack’s neck and hugged. Jack caught him and hugged him back. Looking over Ianto’s head Jack could see Owen watching wistfully.

“Do you forgive me?” Jack held out a hand to Owen.

Owen hung back until Ianto turned to look at him as well, then he let himself be pulled into the hug. It was awkward because they were all adult sized and Jack was still kneeling but nobody minded.

“How about I go and buy us some ice cream?” Gwen suggested smiling at the picture they made and the fact that Tosh had gotten pictures.

“Can I have orange chocolate chip?” Ianto said, instantly forgetting the rest of his bad mood.

“Sure you can,” Gwen said, “what about you, Owen, what do you want?”

Owen looked thoughtful. “Vanilla,” he said finally.

“Just vanilla?” Gwen said.

“I like vanilla,” Owen said firmly.

“Vanilla it is,” Gwen said, “Tosh, you want to give me a hand?”

“Sure,” Tosh said, “I’ll grab my coat.”

“Don’t I get to choose?” Jack demanded.

“You’ll have banana like you always do,” Gwen said with a roll of her eyes.

Owen laughed and covered it up quickly with a cough. He looked warily at Jack who just grinned back at him until he relaxed.

“How about we play cards while we wait for the girls?” Jack said.

When the girls returned they found Ianto soundly trouncing Owen and Jack at pairs.

“I’m beating them,” Ianto said proudly, “Owen bet us at Texas Hold’em and Jack is really bad at cards.”

Tosh grinned as she handed around the ice cream while Gwen fetched serviettes.

“These two are budding card sharks I reckon,” Jack said as the two ruined the effect with ice cream chin grins.

Gwen blinked as child faces overlaid their features for a moment and she could see what they must have been like when young. Ianto was using his serviette to wipe his face carefully, while Owen paid no attention to the ice cream he was dripping onto the table as he licked around the cone in perfect circles. Jack had taken a big bite and was struggling to combat the cold in his mouth with a very unflattering but endearing expression.

“What do you want to do after your ice cream?” Tosh asked them.

“Read,” Owen said instantly and Ianto nodded in agreement.

“What do you want to read?” Tosh said.

“The latest Harry Potter,” Owen said, “it’s in the desk over there.” He pointed to Suzie’s old area.

“What’s it doing over there?” Gwen said.

“Owen keeps it there,” Ianto replied.

“How did you know?” Owen said angrily.

“I know lots,” Ianto replied, “and I was reading it too,” he added.

Owen’s anger evaporated at Ianto’s sheepish smile. “I could read it to you if you like,” he said.

Jack watched from his office as Owen read with Ianto leaning over his shoulder. From a distance it looked like the two men were pouring over work, but they were so relaxed that Jack almost wished they could stay that way.

Until the Rift alarm went off and he and Gwen had to head out to handle things on their own while Tosh stayed back and babysat. Owen and Ianto might have been big enough to handle things but the childish minds wouldn’t cope with the monsters and Jack didn’t want to make them cry again.

They headed out and Jack begged Tosh again to work on restoring the men to their former selves. He really didn’t like how clucky Tosh and Gwen were getting around them.

END

***

Next story in series - The trouble with teenagers.