Title : Following the Breadcrumbs
Author : Melanie
Summary : Story number 9 in the series. Sometimes it takes someone on the outside looking in to give you perspective. This is for all intents and purposes a CSI/Division crossover. Pairings to be revealed along the way J.
Disclaimer : I’m just borrowing. All characters and everything else CSI belongs to Zuiker, Bruckheimer and CBS. All characters and everything else The Division belongs to Lifetime Television, Debra Joy Levine and lots of other people that aren’t me. I thank you all for such awesome characters. Please don’t sue. I’ve heard it’s impossible to get blood from a stone… Rating : R mostly for language.
Feedback : Goes here : Fivebyfive13@prodigy.net
Archive : Ask me and it’s yours :)
Author’s Note : The lyrics are from Athenaeum’s ‘Sweeter Love’. It tends to rip the soul from me. This story came so vividly to me in my head that I just hope I was able to express it in a way that not only makes sense, but also represents the characters in a way that does them due justice. Hope you all enjoy. And tons of thanks to all the people that continue to send me feedback after every installment…you know who you are and you rock! And a very special thank you goes out to Shatterpath for taking a sneak peak and giving me the thumbs up J

“I do not believe in fairy tales
I have bit off all my fingernails
I will never wash these sheets again
You know, the ones you left me in…”
 
Las Vegas, Nevada

Catherine heard the alarm go off over forty minutes earlier and burrowed deeper
into the warm blankets surrounding her…somehow holding her together in one
piece.  Squinting into the intrusive sunlight, she craned her neck to check out
the clock again, shook her head, and shoved her face back into the mattress
below her.  Her hands absentmindedly searched for the missing pillows, but
stopped when she realized she was still clutching them to her chest like a lost
lover that had finally come home.   Footsteps padded down the carpeted hallway,
no doubt coming to get her, but Catherine tried to ignore them and forced her
eyes shut tight.

“Mommy, I’m gonna be late for school,” her daughter said, tugging at Catherine’s
foot as it jutted out from underneath her tangled comforter.  “Mommy,” she said
again when Catherine didn’t respond.

Catherine pushed up and around to a sitting position, leaning back on her hands
and stretched her legs painfully.   She took in the appearance of the fully
dressed little girl standing at the end of her bed, backpack already slung over
her small shoulders and exhaled heavily.

“Have I ever let you be late for school before, Linds?” she asked, rolling her
neck.

Lindsey stared at her mother with knowing eyes and less-than-playful smirk,
hands crossed over her chest.  It was a look Catherine knew all too well.   She
had invented it.

“Right, don’t answer that,” Catherine said with a nervous grin, throwing off the
covers and climbing to her feet.

Five minutes later, with her hair pulled back, her bare feet stuck in running
shoes, and a sweatshirt thrown carelessly over pajama pants, Catherine finally
managed to meet up with her daughter at the front walkway of their house. 
Halfway to the car, she stopped dead in her tracks.  Hands flew to her pockets,
patting down every place she could have fit them.  She stopped and felt suddenly
disappointed and angry at herself.

“Dammit,” she said, clenching her fists and throwing her head back to look into
the clear blue sky.

“What?” Lindsey asked, tugging at her backpack.

“Keys are inside,” Catherine grimaced, not allowing herself to look at her
daughter because it would only make her hate herself more.  She felt the cool,
metal ring being pressed into her hand and finally turned her head to see
Lindsey staring at her with a strange look on her face.

“What?” Catherine dreaded asking.

“You’re going out like that?” she asked, pointing to Catherine’s worn
appearance.

“You want a ride?” Catherine asked in mock anger, advancing on her daughter with
menacing eyes.

“Yes,” Lindsey answered with a giggle as she ran to the passenger side door.

“Good,” Catherine smiled.   “Then get in the car, kiddo.”

The ride to Lindsey’s school was quick and silent; the only hint of waking life
the low chatter of the talk radio guys wafting from the small speakers.  Lindsey
mostly looked out the window and hummed the latest pop tune under her breath.  
Catherine tried to concentrate on the road, both hands gripping the wheel, as
she pushed thoughts of the trial and Sara as far from her mind as she could. 
Pulling up to the curb outside the front entrance of the school, Lindsey finally
spoke to her mother tentatively.

“Mom,” she began, staring down at her hands nervously.   “Sara left, didn’t
she?”

Catherine was caught off guard, to say the least.   But even worse, at the
mention of Sara’s name, she felt her heart crumble inside of her chest. 
Brushing the hair out of Lindsey’s face with a gentle hand, she answered.

“Yeah, baby.  She did.”

“Is she coming back?” Lindsey turned tear-filled eyes on Catherine that broke
her heart even more.

“I don’t know, sweetie,” Catherine admitted, pulling the young girl into a warm
and comforting embrace and stroking her hair.   “But I hope so.”

********************

San Francisco, California

There was a moist and steady drizzle coming down when Sara finally exited the
yellow cab and took her first step onto firm San Francisco concrete in more than
a year.   She stared up at the building as a rush of pleasant nostalgia rushed
over her and brought a genuine smile to her lips.   Feeling the tips of her hair
starting to curl up, Sara adjusted her backpack and slipped her sunglasses into
her pocket before moving towards the steps with a lightness and calm in her that
had been absent for so long she could hardly remember ever feeling at ease.  
She heard commotion down the street to her right and turned in time to see a
young man slipping out of police custody and running at her full speed.

Sara dropped her bag and stood completely still, looking at the building instead
of the human bullet speeding in her direction.   Making sure he had no idea she
was watching him out of the corner of her eye, Sara waited until the last
possible minute and stepped out in front of him.  There was a brief flash of
surprise and fear in the man’s eyes before she bent at the waist throwing her
shoulder into his midsection and using his momentum to flip him over her body in
a rush of blurred movement.  The man hit the ground with a thud and a loud
groan, sprawling his legs out and struggling to catch his breath.  Sara quickly
rolled him onto his stomach and pulled his left arm so far up his back, she was
almost positive it was going to snap.   Kneeling down on his back, she finally
turned in the direction he had come from.

“Anybody got cuffs?” she yelled, holding her free hand out.

Once she felt them dropped into her hand, Sara swiftly slapped them on the
fugitive and pulled him to a standing position.   Turning to regard her
assistant, she wasn’t quite ready for what met her.  Suddenly she was staring
into hard, determined blue eyes.  The face of a woman who definitely had cop in
her blood, her veins, the core of her being.  Sharp, dark hair framing her face,
hands on her hips, and attitude flowing from every inch of her body.  Looking at
this woman, Sara could almost swear she had met her match.   She wanted to take
a step back, but smiled at the stranger instead and handed over the young man
without taking her eyes from the unforgiving cop standing her ground in front of
her.

“Just squeeze until he screams,” Sara offered with a warm smile.  “Always works
for me,” she added and hurried up the steps and into the building without
turning back.

Stepping out of the elevator, Sara was met with the hustling and bustling of the
Division.  It looked exactly as it did when she had gotten the call from Grissom
and left for Las Vegas nearly two years earlier.  Try as she may, Sara couldn’t
manage to wipe the grin off her face as she sauntered down the hallways and
peered through the blinds near the familiar office space.  

Even more familiar was the tall blonde sitting at her desk alternately flipping
through a file, slugging on a hot cup of coffee, and throwing balled up pieces
of paper at the good-looking guy sitting at the desk across from hers.  And the
wider that woman smiled, the wider Sara smiled…and the harder it was for her to
keep her stomach from leaping up her chest and out of her mouth.

“Can I help you?” came another familiar voice from behind her.

“Still workin’ them like dogs, I see,” Sara turned to face the woman at her
back.

Kaitlyn McCafferty tried to keep the shock from her face, but even below the
cool exterior she had perfected so well Sara could tell she was surprised…and
pleasantly.  She looked exactly the same as Sara remembered her.   All fiery
hair and attitude; commanding, demanding.   She smiled.  So did Sara.

“You get fired already?” McCafferty replied only half-joking.

“Something like that,” Sara smiled back and gave a small laugh.  “Things haven’t
changed around here one bit.”

“I wouldn’t bet my pension on that if I were you,” the Captain warned with
sparkling eyes.

“You still think you know everything, huh Captain?” Sara teased.

“I knew you’d be back,” McCafferty answered, matter-of-factly.   “And here you
are,” she added and motioned for Sara to follow her in through the open glass
door.

“CD, look what I found,” she announced once inside, causing many sets of eyes
turned in Sara’s direction before walking towards her office and turning around
at the last minute.   “Glad to have you back, kid,” she said and disappeared
behind a closed door.

“I half thought you were joking,” CD said smiling from ear to ear as she stood
and took two long steps towards Sara.   “I have to say I’m glad you weren’t.”

“Me too,” Sara nodded and put her arms around the tall blonde in a very tight
and warm embrace, the air of being previous lovers surrounding them with ease. 
What seemed like a lifetime later, they finally pulled apart.

“You grew out your hair,” Sara commented, reaching out to touch the tendrils.

“So did you,” CD replied, shifting her weight from one foot to the other.

“I liked it better short,” Sara teased with a smile.

“I liked yours better curly,” CD countered.

“Give me a few more hours in this rain and you’ll be one happy woman,” Sara
said.

“Who says I’m not already?” the blonde challenged with one eyebrow raised.

“Uh hem,” came a throaty grunt-slash-cough from their right, interrupting them.

“Sorry,” CD shook her head, still slightly caught up in the moment.  “This is my
partner, Nate Basso,” she said motioning to the dark haired man rising to his
feet. “Nate, this is Sara Sidle, former CSI San Francisco and Las Vegas.”

“Good to meet you,” he said, holding out a hand and smiling handsomely.

“Hey,” Sara smiled back and firmly took his hand for a moment.  “What happened
to Angela?” she asked CD.

“Long, long story,” the blonde replied quickly.

“So what brings you back to this shithole?” Nate asked with a grin.

“Yeah, what does bring you back to our fine city?” CD added with wondrous eyes
and a sarcastic smile.

“I think you’ve lost your manners, Candace,” Sara countered with an evil glare
and turned towards a beautiful dark-skinned woman sitting near McCafferty’s
office obviously enjoying the show also.  “You haven’t introduced me to everyone
yet.”

“Right, sorry,” CD glared at her.   “This is Raina Washington . Semi-newbie, hot
off the Inspector line.   Worked her cute ass off to get here.”

“CD, what’d I tell you about talking about my ass like that?” Raina teased with
a smile before extending a well-manicured hand in Sara’s direction.  “Nice to
meet you, Sara.”

“Likewise,” Sara smiled back.   “I see you fit in around here just fine.   Takes
some kind of woman to keep CD in check.”

“How would you know?” CD slid at her with a sideways glance.
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“Hey when are you gonna give up that queer shoulder harness and shoot from the
hip like a real woman,” Sara shot back at her while motioning to her firearm.

“As soon as you stop running away every time your life gets the slightest bit
complicated,” the blonde answered with a heavy stare.

“Touché,” Sara replied, staring back.   “You know where I can catch a bus back
to Vegas?” she asked with a laugh, turning to an amused Nate.

“Hey, leave me out of this,” he said, putting both hands up in front of him.

“What time you get out of here?” Sara asked CD, both still smiling although a
little less radiant than before.

“’Bout an hour,” she guessed, glancing at the clock.   “Dinner?”

“So nice of you to ask,” the brunette replied.   “Meet you across the street?”

“Still the best burgers in town,” CD answered.

“Good to know some things will never change,” Sara smiled and waved a small,
subtle wave to all three of them before heading back out into the hallway.

********************

Las Vegas, Nevada

“Catherine?”

Nothing.

“Catherine?”

Still nothing.

“Catherine?” Nick demanded louder, snapping his fingers in front of her face.

“Huh?” she said, finally looking up from the dark abyss of her coffee and into
his concerned eyes.   “Sorry,” she apologized and closed the file she wasn’t
really looking at.

“DNA’s up,” he answered, placing a hand on her shoulder.   “You want me to get
it?”

“No,” she said, shaking her head and standing.   “I’m gonna have to face him
sooner or later.   Now’s as good a time as any.”

Nick nodded and waited for her to join him before heading towards the DNA lab. 
He could tell Catherine was slightly nervous and tentative by the way she played
with the ends of her coat sleeves like a little girl.   It was an innocence he
had never noticed in her before, something she had always hidden so well it was
overlooked.   She was coming apart at the seams and he knew it.   They all did.

“Hey, Greg-O,” Nick said, as he and Catherine filed into the room.  “Looking
like quite the stud today,” he added with a wink and smile.

“If you think that’s going to make me be nice to Catherine you’re wrong,” Greg
answered stiffly, staring down at his next specimen.

“Greg…”

“No, Nick,” Catherine said, waving him off.   “It’s fine,” she added and turned
to Greg.  “Results?”

Greg didn’t say anything, just grabbed a piece of paper from the machine, slid
over to the desk in his chair and threw it across the table at her without
looking up.  Then he slid right back over to where he was before and acted like
no one else was there.  Catherine picked up the paper, handed it to Nick, and
took a deep breath.

“Can you wait outside?” she asked her partner.   “I think Greg and I need to
have a little talk.”

“Sure,” he nodded and walked into the hallway, making sure to close the door
behind him.

“Save it,” Greg said, once Nick was gone.   “I have nothing to say to you,” he
didn’t look up, but had stopped processing the specimen.

“I miss her too, Greg,” Catherine said ignoring his protests, feeling her chest
get tight.  “And I’m sorry, but there was no other way.”

“You know what?” he said, standing up and kicking his chair to the floor next to
him so angry he was seeing red.   “Fuck you, Catherine.  My best friend is
gone,” he glared at her so intensely Catherine was sure he was trying to burn a
hole right through her.   “She’s gone hundreds of miles away.   And she left
because of you.  Because you gave up on her.  So excuse me if I’m a little
bitter.  If I don’t really feel like having tea and cookies with you when my
shift is over.” 

“She left because she wanted to,” Catherine said wearily, half trying to
convince herself too.

“No, she left because you broke her fucking heart,” he shouted back at her. 
“Tell yourself whatever you want, but don’t you dare come in here spouting off
that bullshit at me.”

“I’m in a position…” she tried, tears stinging her eyes.

“Fuck your position,” he cut her off.   “She would have died for you, she loved
you so much.   Christ, she almost did.  And you repay her by dropping her like a
bad habit the second things get rough.”

“You don’t know the first thing about our relationship,” Catherine stated,
starting to get angry at his insolence.

“Don’t I?” he countered, stepping closer.   “She told me everything, Catherine. 
The only thing she ever talked about was you.   Every second she was happy she
told me how much she loved you.   And the night you broke it off she told me how
much she hurt.   And I will never sit back and watch that again because it was
all I could do to hold her together.”

“What do you want me to do, Greg?   Huh?” She shouted back. “What?”

“You know what you have to do,” he answered.   “What you should do.  What I know
you want to do deep down.  But she’s not going to wait forever, Catherine.   In
fact, it might already be too late.”

Catherine felt the tears struggling and pushed them back down again.  She walked
to the door and turned back to see Greg gripping his desk with both hands.  
Running a hand through already messy hair, she spoke.

“Tell her I love her,” she half asked.

“Tell her yourself,” Greg spat and turned back to his machines.

********************
San Francisco, California

“So, you gonna tell me about her?” CD asked as she raised a french fry drenched
in mayonnaise to her lips.

“How can you desecrate a perfectly good fry like that?” Sara teased.

“You’re avoiding.”

“I am not.  Besides, how do you know there even is a her?” Sara asked, shifting
on her barstool.

“You wanna play games?” CD asked with both eyebrows raised.   “Fine, I’ll bite. 
God, I wish we’d gotten a booth so you’d have to look at me when I say this to
you,” she added with irritated determination.

Sara stared straight ahead at the bar top, trying to melt her beer bottle with a
single glaring look and trying to maintain a steady breathing pattern.  She knew
what she was in for and she wasn’t sure she was ready for it.   One is seldom
ready for the truth.   Not the watered down version.  The real, hard, concrete
truth.

“I know you,” the blonde said, piercing blue eyes staring down Sara’s flinching
profile intently.  “You can walk into a crime scene, step over a body like it
isn’t even there, and detach yourself from the entire world for hours at a time.
  You can drink and scrap and fuck until you just can’t seem to move anymore. 
And you can lie with such complete conviction that you’ve even convinced
yourself it’s the truth,” she added and turned in her chair, waiting for Sara to
look at her.   After a few seconds deep brown eyes met her own.

“But there’s only one thing that makes you run,” CD continued without wavering. 
“And that’s the fear of getting hurt.”

The words cut through Sara like the sharpest knife ever made.  Up until this
point, she had been fooling herself into believing that the choice to leave
everything behind had been made in an effort to make things easier on Catherine.
  But that wasn’t it at all.  Catherine had taken a step back, but Sara had in
turn pushed her so far away that she wasn’t even in sight anymore.  Instead of
staying and fighting…making Catherine believe that she wouldn’t give up…that she
wouldn’t go anywhere, Sara had just turned her back and walked away.  Not
because it was easier on Catherine, but because it was easier on herself.   Sara
turned back to her beer and took a generous drink.

“Sometimes, I really hate you.   You know that, C?” she said with a smile,
looking straight ahead.

“I think you’ve made that abundantly clear now and then,” the blonde replied,
turning back to her fries.

“Listen, C,” Sara said, shifting to look at the woman sitting next to her.

“Forget it,” CD said, waving a hand.   “Water under the bridge.   We were a
wrong fit right from the start.”

“I dunno,” Sara smiled.   “I remember it working pretty well for a while.”

“Because we both knew it would never really go anywhere,” CD shrugged and caught
Sara’s eyes. 

“Meaning?”

“Fuck, Sar,” CD said swiveling on her stool so she was fully facing the
brunette.  “I was married.   And you were sleeping with the entire thirty-eighth
precinct behind my back.”

“First of all, two women does not an entire precinct make,” Sara countered,
shifting to face her friend head on.  “And you being married didn’t make one bit
of difference and you know it.   You weren’t in love with him anyway.”

“No, I was in love with you,” CD answered with a heartbreakingly serious face
and turned back to her plate.   “Anyway, at least you learned never to mess with
married women.   It inevitably leads to heartache, however great or small.”

Sara looked down sheepishly, almost embarrassed, and turned forward in her seat
again.  She drained the last of her beer and motioned to the bartender holding
up the bottle and then two fingers.  Once he had come back, she opened one
bottle for herself and slid the other one down to the blonde sitting next to
her.

“I’m not finished with this one yet,” CD commented, holding the half empty
bottle to her lips.

“You’re gonna need it.   Trust me,” Sara confessed.  “She’s married.  Was
married,” Sara quickly corrected herself.   “Divorced, actually.”

“What?” CD choked, almost spitting her beer all over the counter.  “Did being
with me not teach you anything?”

“I know.  I know,” Sara nodded, playing with her napkin.

“Well, at least you waited until the papers were signed this time.”

“With her scumbag ex lurking in the shadows, does it really matter?”

“Depends on the woman,” CD answered truthfully.

“She’s amazing,” Sara admitted with a smile of remembrance.   “She works
overtime, raises an eight year-old by herself, and still manages to find time to
fit my sorry ass into her life.   And she never once complains about any of it.”

“Sara Sidle playing house,” CD smiled.   “You’re right; I do need this other
beer.”

“No, C,” Sara insisted.   “I really love her.  I love that little girl.  I think
I finally ended up where I always wanted to be.”

“Then what the fuck are you doing here?   I love you, Sar.  You know that,” the
blonde said, touching Sara’s arm briefly.   “But you are the champion of fucked
up decisions.”

“She can’t be with me right now,” Sara answered, slugging on her beer.  “Custody
battle.  Society, whatever.”

“And you just decided you couldn’t wait?” CD asked incredulously.   “No, you
were secretly waiting for that moment.   The second she gave you that out, you
took it.”

“She didn’t give me any other choice…”

“Bullshit.  Take it from someone who’s been in a relationship with you.   You
are a pain in the ass most of the time, but you’re worth it.   Now if you had
given this mystery woman a couple days to wallow in her unhappiness of being
without you, I’m sure you’d be curled around her like a baby right now.  But you
booked it out of there like your ass was on fire,” CD shook her head.

“Thank you Doctor DeLorenzo,” Sara said sarcastically.

“You can pay me later,” CD smiled back.

“I don’t wanna talk about it anymore,” Sara shook her head and drained her beer.
“ How’s things with you?”

“Divorced and never been happier,” CD replied, clinking her beer against Sara’s.

“And now the rest of the story,” Sara prodded.

“Work’s good,” CD shrugged.   “A little disturbing here and there, but good.  
Everything’s good.”

“Love life?” Sara asked.

“Don’t.”

“Come on.”

“Let’s just say there’s someone, but it’s nothing…it’s complicated,” CD
answered.  “It’s more like a dangerous flirtation.  But I’m not even sure it’s
really there.  It’s complicated.”

“Yeah, you said that,” Sara smiled.   “What about your partner?  What’s his
name, Nate?  He seems to have a little thing going for you.”

“He does,” CD nodded.

“And?”

“And nothing,” CD replied with a sigh.   “Let’s just say that I learned the hard
way that getting involved with someone at work, let alone your partner, is never
a good thing.   Anyway, moving on.”

“C…”

“Moving on,” the blonde reiterated.   “Where are you staying now that you’re
unemployed and homeless?”

“I hadn’t really thought about it,” Sara admitted.

“Where’s your stuff?”

“Right here,” Sara kicked the backpack at her feet.

“Where’s the rest of it?” CD asked, confused.

“Most of it’s in storage,” Sara answered.   “I’m keeping the apartment for now,
but I moved mostly everything out of it.  I’ve got some stuff being sent in a
few days.”

“Well, I’ve got a couch,” CD suggested with a smile.   “I know how much you like
them.”

“CD, I don’t think…”

“Listen, the hotels around here suck,” CD waved her off.   “As long as you keep
your hands to yourself, I can see no problems,” she added with a grin.

“As long as I keep my hands to myself,” Sara repeated with a smile, throwing a
few bills onto the countertop and grabbing her bag.   “Lead the way.”

On their way out of the diner, Sara stopped in the middle of the doorway causing
CD to bump into her.   The blonde didn’t move at all, in fact flirting with
disaster and desire by standing her ground.  Sara took a deep breath and looked
up into hard, lustrous blue eyes and found the air around her growing tight.

“I can’t make any promises,” she said in all seriousness.

“I know,” CD replied in a husky tone.   “We better go,” she added, and stepped
past Sara into the night.



Two hours later, after CD had tucked her in and headed off to her own bedroom
making sure Sara knew the door would lock behind her, Sara felt around the end
table in the dark until she felt the receiver of the cordless phone in her hand.
Thankful that the numbers were glow in the dark, she punched in ten of them and
held the phone to her ear.

“Hey, it’s Sara,” she said once the other end had picked up.  “I need you to do
me a favor.   Yeah…no, I don’t want anyone to know I called.   Thanks,” she
smiled, exhaled nervously, and waited.

********************

Las Vegas, Nevada

“You about done there, Nicky?” Catherine asked as she packed up her case and
walked away from the body at their latest crime scene.

“Uh, yup.   Just gimme a second to…” he trailed off, squinted and snapped a
bullet fragment from where it was burrowed into the wall and into the paper
envelope he held in his hand.  “All set,” he smiled and fell into step next to
Catherine.

“Good snag,” she commented.

“I learned from the best,” he complemented and turned to look at Catherine, her
downtrodden aura still intact.   “How you holding up?” he asked.

“Just fabulous,” Catherine answered sarcastically.   “Can’t you tell?”

“She’ll be back,” Nick said, squeezing a hand on her shoulder.

“Will she?” Catherine asked sadly.   “I’m beginning to think she won’t.   I
think I really fucked up this time, Nicky.”

“Maybe she just forgot her way,” Nick suggested squinting into nothing in the
distance.

“Maybe I should go remind her,” Catherine answered, her chest feeling heavy once
again.

“Maybe you should,” Nick turned his eyes to hers and nodded.

Catherine was about to say something else when the ringing of her cell phone
interrupted their conversation.   Nick smiled as she held up her finger
signaling ‘just a second’ and turned around to answer the call.

“Willows,” she said, kicking at the sand underneath her feet.  “Yeah.   Hey,
Trent.   No, I haven’t.  What?   Eddie’s lawyer what?  Eddie what?!?  Jesus,
you’re kidding me.   No, thanks Trent.   Yeah.  Goodbye.”

Catherine clicked off the phone and held it tightly in her hand.  She turned
around to face an anticipatory Nick and nearly lost her footing.   Her mouth
twitched up ever so slightly at the edges as her body was lost in mostly shock
and underlying joy.   Catherine shook her head and ran a hand through her hair
before speaking.

“What is it?” Nick asked, reaching out a hand to steady her.

“Uh…Eddie dropped the lawsuit and skipped town again,” Catherine answered,
feeling so overwhelmed that tears came to her eyes.   “Trent, my lawyer, said
that he signed over all his parental rights to me and then just disappeared.”

“Catherine, that’s great,” Nick smiled and pulled her into a warm embrace.  “So,
why are you crying?”

“She’s gone, Nicky,” Catherine breathed against his strong chest.  “She’s
gone…and for nothing.”

********************

San Francisco, California

“You’re home late,” Sara commented, glancing at the clock that read just after
eleven, as CD entered the condo and dropped her bag near the door.  “Rough day?”
she asked, noting the tension and aggravation in the blonde’s body language.

“Worst,” CD replied, sitting down next to Sara on the couch with a resounding
thud.

“Here,” Sara said, pulling the blonde to a sitting position and turning her in
the opposite direction.  

She carefully slid CD’s coat off from behind and threw it on the chair behind
her.  She did the same to the shoulder holster and then brought her hands up to
the blonde’s tense shoulders, kneading them with skilled fingers.   The throaty
moans they elicited from CD let Sara know quickly that she hadn’t lost her
touch.

“You’re so good at that,” CD said in a low tone, letting her head fall forward
as her shoulders were serviced.

“Tell me about it,” Sara prodded and then laughed.   “Your day, I mean,” she
corrected herself.

“Fifteen year-old girl raped and killed by her drug dealing boyfriend in the
middle of the afternoon,” CD answered.   “Now he’s on the run and we’ve got no
leads, no eyewitnesses, and no murder weapon.”

“So how do you know he did it?” Sara asked, moving her hands from CD’s shoulders
to her back.

“Left his DNA all over the place,” she replied, feeling her heartbeat speed up
as Sara’s hands got lower.   “And I mean that literally.  His blood was
everywhere.  Must’ve gotten cut somehow in the struggle.   It never gets any
easier, you know?” she asked, craning her neck to catch Sara’s eyes.  “With
kids.”

“I know,” Sara nodded and stopped her hands near CD’s waist, pulling her shirt
from her pants and slipping her hands underneath to bare skin.  “The day it gets
easy is the day it’s time to quit.”

“I think you should sleep in the bed tonight,” CD said quickly in a dangerous
tone, Sara’s hands on her bare skin igniting a fire deep within her.  “With me.”

“C,” Sara began, pulling her hands back and clutching them in her lap.

“Tell me you don’t want to,” CD said, turning to face Sara completely and look
her straight in the eyes.

“I do and that’s the problem,” Sara admitted.   “It won’t change anything.  It
won’t solve anything.  Yeah, I could sleep with you right now, but it wouldn’t
mean anything.   And you deserve more than that.”

“What if I said I didn’t care?” CD countered.   “That I don’t need it to be
anything more than it is?”

“I’d say you better get up, go to your room, and lock the door behind you before
we both do something we’ll regret in the morning,” Sara answered in a husky
tone.

“I stopped regretting things the day you left town,” the blonde answered
definitively and held Sara’s eyes as she leaned forward.

Sara closed her eyes, but didn’t back away and she was mentally kicking herself
for it when the doorbell rang and interrupted the disaster that was about to
take place.  She opened her eyes tentatively to see CD smile and laugh before
getting up to answer it.  Sara fell back onto the couch, exhaling heavily and
covering her face with her hands as she heard the door open.

“Hey,” CD said, after opening the door and taking a surprised step back. 
“Didn’t I just leave you?” she asked with a smile.

“Yeah, sorry,” the brunette that greeted her answered.   “I just left actually. 
I’ve been staring at this fucking file for over an hour,” she motioned with her
hands, “and I know I’m not gonna get any sleep as long as this guy’s still out
there.  And with Magda pulling overtime at the hospital, I was just…I mean, I…”
she paused and shook her head.  “You know what, forget it,” she said and started
walking away.

“Jinny, wait,” CD said reaching outside to grab her leather clad arm.  “Come
in,” she said, stepping back to allow the brunette entrance.

“Thanks,” Jinny answered with an embarrassed smile and stepped into the
apartment.   “Asking for help…well, it’s just not my thing.”

“You’re getting better at it,” CD smiled back at her and touched her shoulder as
she passed into the living room.

“Shit, I’m sorry,” Jinny apologized as she saw the figure on the couch.  “I
didn’t know you had anyone…” she trailed off as Sara pulled her hands away from
her face and the recognition set in.

“No, it’s okay,” CD said, motioning for her to keep walking.   “Sara, this is
Jinny Exstead.  She’s Magda’s partner,” she introduced them, noticing that they
were staring at each other intensely.  “Jinny, this is Sara Sidle.”

“So this is the infamous Sara Sidle,” Jinny commented.   Sara smiled and took
note of the sparkle in the other woman’s blue eyes.  “I should’ve known
yesterday.”

“Wait a sec,” CD said in confusion.   “You two have met?”

“Uh, yeah,” Sara answered, managing to tear her eyes away from Jinny long enough
to answer CD’s question and walk over to take Jinny’s outstretched hand.  “Gave
Exstead here an assist yesterday on my way in.”

“Tackled one of my skips like a linebacker,” Jinny grinned as she took Sara’s
hand.  “Thanks,” she said shaking Sara’s hand firmly.

“My pleasure, I’m sure,” Sara replied, holding the other woman’s hand a little
longer than necessary and seeing the subtle glare CD was giving her out of the
corner of her eye.   “And what did you mean by infamous?” she shot CD a glare of
her own.

“Yeah, I’d be pretty pissed if I were you too,” Jinny answered.  “I would’ve
expected you to be sportin’ a cloak and packin’ horns by the way CD talks about
you.”

“Really?” Sara asked, eyes glued to CD.

“No, kidding actually,” Jinny answered with a small smile that grew a little
wider when CD reached over and pushed her playfully.   “Only good
things…mostly.”

“I can live with that,” Sara said, shifting her eyes back to the brunette cop in
front of her.  “So, last I heard Ramirez was flying solo.   How come we’ve never
met?”

“Uh, yeah,” CD answered first.   “Jinny was uh…away pretty much the whole time
you were working with us.”

“Okay,” Sara said with furrowed brows, but finally got the hint to move on when
CD shot her a knowing glance.   “So where is Ramirez anyway?  I didn’t see her
yesterday.”

A silence fell over them like a blanket that just wouldn’t keep out the cold. 
The chill in the air flowed through them like an unwelcome guest.   Sara grew
even more confused.

“She’s sort of on leave right now,” CD explained while Jinny averted her eyes. 
“Her son’s got leukemia.”

“Ben?” Sara asked, surprised.   “Ben’s got leukemia?  Fuck,” she shook her head.

“Yeah,” CD nodded.  “She spends most of her time at the hospital.”

“Last case I had before…” Sara started but had to stop as memories of Catherine
flooded her mind and made it hard for her to formulate a sentence.

“What?” CD asked.  Jinny picked her head up in time to see Sara shake off the
images and collect herself.

“Uh, nothing,” she gave a fake smile.   “What’s in that file?” she pointed to
Jinny’s hands.

“Work,” Jinny answered.

“Raping, murdering drug dealer?” Sara smiled widely.

“Uh, yeah actually,” Jinny answered with a smile of her own.  “You tell her
everything?” she teased CD.

“Only the important stuff,” CD shrugged and held Jinny’s eyes too long. 
“Anybody want a drink?”   She pulled her eyes away.

“I’ll have a beer,” Sara answered and held out a hand to Jinny.  “You mind?” she
asked, regarding the file.

“Guess it can’t hurt,” Jinny answered with a shrug.

“Don’t speak too soon,” CD warned and headed to the kitchen.   “Coke, Jinny?”

“Yeah, thanks,” she answered and followed Sara to the couch.

Sara sat down and flipped open the file, stopping to read the coroner’s report
first.  There were signs of violent sexual intercourse; tearing, scarring.   The
girl’s name was Carmen Garcia and they matched prints and DNA from the crime
scene to her boyfriend, known drug dealer Juan Sanchez.   Carmen died from blunt
force trauma to the head.   Sara felt the couch give way next to her as Jinny
sat down and removed her jacket.  She flipped past the report and started on the
pictures.  The first one, a close-up of Carmen Garcia’s body, jumped out at her.

“Jesus, how’d you guys ID her?   Dental records?” she asked, noting the mess
Juan Sanchez had made of her face.

“Fingerprints,” Jinny replied, leaning closer to Sara’s shoulder to get a better
look at the picture.   “I’ve heard you’ve seen worse.”

Sara took a breath and closed her eyes for a moment, remembering the case that
had almost killed her months before.   She then turned her head to the left,
almost flinching when they collided with blue that was so close it was
unnerving.   Sara managed to catch her breath and speak.

“Depends on what you consider worse,” she escaped and managed a small smile
before turning back to the folder.   “How long you been sober?”

“What?”

“There’s no way anyone refuses a beer after staring at pictures like this all
day long unless they’re on the wagon,” Sara answered.   “Plus CD said you were
away , which either means you went fucking nuts or you were in rehab.”

“I’m tempted to get really pissed off at that comment, but for some reason I’m
not.   So either I really like you or those anger management courses are really
starting to pay off,” Jinny grinned.  “Besides, I thought you were unemployed.”

“Yes, I am,” Sara replied with a nod.

“So how come you’re still…how do they say it on your side of the shield? 
Following the evidence?” Jinny teased.

“I guess it’s in my blood,” Sara shrugged.

“I hear that’s not all that’s in your blood,” Jinny said, reaching past Sara to
grab the coroner’s report.  

“So, you and CD seem pretty tight,” Sara commented as Jinny flipped through the
report again.

“We are,” Jinny shrugged.   “Well, as ‘tight’ as we can be without actually
having to admit it.   I mean, I’m no open book…not by a long shot.   But she’s
got walls bigger than my last Visa bill.”

“She’s got trust issues,” Sara shrugged also.   “And those walls weren’t always
there.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, I should know,” Sara nodded solemnly.   “I’m the one who helped her build
them.”

“Then I guess I should be formulating all the ways I’m gonna kick your ass,
huh?” Jinny replied with a smirk.

“How about I help you solve this case instead?” Sara offered, holding Jinny’s
eyes in a silent apology for things the cop couldn’t even understand yet.

“Let’s see what you got,” Jinny said and turned her focus back to the file
folder.

“Okay, you’ve got a girl raped and killed with looks like a couple blows to the
head at least,” Sara scanned the picture.   “Defensive wounds on the arms.  Is
this the knife used to cut the perp?” she pointed.

“Looks that way,” Jinny answered.   “Got his blood and her prints on it.”

“So what are we missing?” Sara asked and spread out the pictures on the table. 
“He’s a drug dealer.  Probably a junkie, too.  But he left her pipe and her
stash on the table next to her.   He was probably high when it all went down.  
Something happened and he freaked.   There’s no way he would have left her there
like that and ran if he was in his right mind.  He would have gotten rid of the
body and cleaned up.   So what set him off?”

“Maybe it was when she told him she was pregnant,” Jinny offered, resting her
elbows on her knees and threading her hands together.

“Now he’s going down for double,” Sara shook her head.

“And statutory rape,” Jinny added.   “He’s twenty-four.”

“Jesus Christ,” Sara uttered.   “What is this world coming to?” she started
feeling anger rising inside her.

“I ask myself that question everyday,” Jinny agreed and scanned the photos,
looking for lost clues.

“Wait. Sometimes it’s not about what’s there.   It’s about what isn’t there,”
Sara said and fell to her knees in front of the coffee table.  “Here,” she said
and pointed to a wide shot of the scene.

“What?” Jinny asked, kneeling down next to Sara and leaning into her slightly.

“Uh, see there,” Sara pointed to a spot in between the couch and the body. 
“There’s a void.   There’s blood spatter everywhere, I’m thinking mostly his.  
But right there it’s missing.  It’s got a triangular base.  Maybe a lamp or a
sculpture or something,” she suggested.

“How did we miss that?” Jinny chastised herself and reached further past Sara to
grab the picture and examine it.

“Your guy, Sanchez, is going to need medical treatment for that knife wound,”
Sara said, eyes scanning the pictures again and noting the heavy blood loss. 
“I’ll bet once you corner him, he’ll confess.  Just seems like he’s running
scared.  As for your void…find it, find your murder weapon,” she added. 

“I’d ask you out for a drink sometime, but…”Jinny answered with a smile.  “I
don’t drink,” she laughed.

“And I drink too much,” Sara laughed and smiled.   A phone rang in the distance.
“So, am I off the hook?”

“Give me a chisel and a grappling hook and we’re even,” Jinny offered.

“Deal,” Sara smiled and shook the other woman’s hand.

“Sara, it’s for you,” CD stuck her head around the corner from the kitchen. 
“Someone named Catherine?   Says she’s from your crime lab,” she held the phone
up.

Sara retreated from Jinny’s warm gaze quickly and immediately felt herself go
pale.  She averted her eyes and stood as fast as she could, hurrying to the
phone while she tried to keep her heart from pounding through her chest.   CD
handed her the receiver as she brought the drinks into the living room and
sidled up close to Jinny on the couch.   At that point Sara was positive Jinny
must have been CD’s ‘dangerous flirtation’.  The two of them were a few hundred
yards away from subtle.  Sara raised the phone to her ear and walked as far into
the kitchen as she could get, hoping for a little privacy.

“Hello?”

“Hey,” Catherine said on the other end, her voice triggering a warmth and
longing in Sara that could be nothing other than hard, raw, unwavering love. 
“Listen, I know you probably don’t want to talk to me right now…”

“Catherine, it’s…”

“I just need to tell you something,” Catherine interrupted her, nervousness and
vulnerability apparent in her voice.

“Okay,” Sara conceded, twirling the phone cord in her hand tightly.

“Eddie skipped town,” Catherine said and Sara closed her eyes and took a deep
breath.  “Again.”

“Yeah?” Sara tried to play dumb, but it wasn’t really working.  “That’s great,
Catherine.  Really.”

“Funny thing is that somehow Scarpelli’s guys found out that Eddie was back in
town,” Catherine said sarcastically.   “Seems they weren’t too happy with what
he’d done to their boss. You wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?”

“No, but I can’t say I’m surprised,” Sara replied, picking at the countertop.

“I got a copy of the phone records, Sara,” Catherine said.  “How do you think I
got this number?”

“I called Greg earlier,” Sara suggested, knowing she was going down fast.

“Greg won’t even look at me,” Catherine admitted.   “I know you’re the one who
made the call.”

“So what if I say I did?” Sara asked in a soft tone.

“I’d say thank you,” Catherine answered and paused, drawing a deep breath.  “And
please come home.”

“Nothing’s changed, Catherine,” Sara shook her head.

“I know,” Catherine replied, her voice beginning to waver.   “I know I messed
up…but we can work this out.   I know we can.”

“I just can’t right now,” Sara said, feeling the air around her closing in.  “I
need some time.”

“I’m not giving up on you,” Catherine said quickly.   “On us.”

“Funny, I thought you already had,” Sara said, only half joking.

“Never,” Catherine replied, her voice thick with emotion.   “Lindsey misses
you.” 

“I miss her, too,” Sara replied, closing her eyes and forcing the tears away.

“So, how are you?” Catherine asked eager to lighten the conversation.

“Look in the mirror and tell me,” Sara answered, desperately trying to suppress
her want and need to just take Catherine back when she knew it wasn’t the right
thing to do.

“You’re not doing so good ,” Catherine admitted.

“No?”

“No.”

“Listen, Catherine, I have to go,” Sara said, desperate to hang up before she
lost it completely.

“Right.   Sure,” Catherine answered, struggling herself.   “I’m sorry.”

“I know,” Sara nodded.   “Goodbye, Catherine,” she said and quickly returned the
phone to its cradle.

Sara turned her back to the doorway and felt a wetness on her cheeks betraying
her.   Her breathing was ragged and uneven as she tried to keep from crying.  
She was running a hand through her hair when she heard the footsteps behind her.

“You okay?” CD placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“Uh, yeah.   I’m fine,” Sara answered with a weak smile and laugh as she wiped
at her cheeks furiously and raised her bloodshot eyes to CD’s.

“You don’t look fine,” CD said, removing her hand.   “So, her name’s Catherine,”
CD surmised.

“Yeah,” Sara answered, biting her lip to stop it from quivering.  “And I work
with her.   So it seems I’ll never learn my lesson.”

“No, you won’t,” CD smiled and pulled Sara to her tightly.   “But neither will
I,” she said quietly, gently rubbing Sara’s back as she cried on her shoulder.

“Hey,” Jinny said, stepping into the kitchen and quickly averting her eyes
uncomfortably.  “Sorry.”

“No, it’s okay,” CD answered, reluctantly letting Sara go.

“I’m the one who should be sorry,” Sara said with an apologetic smile. 
“Blubbering over here like a fucking idiot,” she added and wiped at her eyes.

“Don’t worry about it,” Jinny replied and gave her an encouraging and
sympathetic look.  “We’ve all been there.  Anyway, I just wanted to say
goodbye.”

“You’re leaving?” CD asked, disappointment apparent.

“Yeah,” Jinny nodded and gave CD a wide and somewhat nervous smile.  “Sara
cracked the case.   So I’m gonna get a little shuteye before I have to be back
at the office.”

“Right, I’ll walk you out,” CD replied and led Jinny towards the door with a
hand on her shoulder affectionately.

“Sara, I’ll be back to pick your brain later,” Jinny looked over her shoulder
and winked.

“I’ll be out shopping for wrecking balls,” Sara answered with a half smile.

“What?” CD asked in confusion.

“Nothing,” Jinny answered, shaking her head and tugging on CD’s shirt tail. 
“Come on,” she pulled the blonde towards the door.

Sara grabbed a paper towel and wiped her eyes with it.   Then she blew her nose
on it and threw it in the trash barrel.   Grabbing another beer, she jumped onto
the counter and waited patiently for CD to return so that she could say
goodnight and then go back to the couch and crash.  Sara leaned her head back
onto the cabinets and shut her eyes for a second.   When she finally heard CD
close the door again and opened them, almost twenty minutes had passed.

“What?” CD asked folding her arms over her chest at the sideways look Sara was
giving her.

“What are you waiting for, CD?” she asked.

“I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Dammit, CD,” Sara jumped off the counter.   “That woman would’ve ripped your
clothes off tonight if I wasn’t here.”

“I knew I should have made you stay in a hotel,” CD dismissed her and opened the
fridge, mostly just staring inside so she wouldn’t have to face Sara.

“Don’t tell me you were out there for a half hour trading recipes,” Sara crept
closer.

“Well, it’s not like we were making out,” CD countered, slamming the
refrigerator door and turning to face Sara head on.

“Why the fuck not?   You obviously want to,” Sara shot back.   “So does she.”

“Will you please just fucking drop it,” CD shouted, using arm movement for
emphasis.

“No,” Sara shouted back, stepping even closer.   “Why the fuck are you so
scared?”

“Maybe because I really like her,” the blonde admitted, her face so close to
Sara’s she could see the tiny yellow specks in her eyes.  “Maybe because I don’t
want this to be like every other failed relationship I’ve ever had.   Maybe
because I…” she paused and averted her eyes slightly.   “Because I don’t want to
wake up one day and realize she just left,” she said, piercing her eyes hard
into Sara’s and setting her jaw.

“CD, I’m sorry,” Sara flinched and reached out a tentative hand only to have CD
retreat a few feet.

“Forget it.  It doesn’t matter,” CD said sarcastically and gave a small shrug of
her strong shoulders.

“Yes, it does…”

“Look, I know you feel like you have to fix me,” CD said, shaking her head and
feeling her throat get tight.   “But we were over long before you took that job
in Vegas and we both know it.  That day…realizing you were gone…it was hard.  It
was real.   But whether or not Jinny Exstead and I act on our attraction to each
other doesn’t depend on your ability to right your wrongs.   So please just stay
out of it,” she stated, turned, and started walking away.

“You know one day you’re going to have to take a chance again, CD,” Sara called
after her.  “Whether you’re ready to or not.”

Only silence and the slamming of CD’s bedroom door answered her.  Sara turned
off all the lights and sat down on the couch feeling hot tears welling up in her
eyes almost immediately.  She stayed that way for hours until sleep finally
claimed her weary body.

She woke up just before noon and was thankful when she realized CD had left her
car keys on the end table next to her.  There was no note, a sure sign that the
blonde was obviously still angry and hurt.   Sara didn’t blame her.  She had a
way of making messes out of the majority of her relationships.

Two cups of coffee and a shower later, Sara grabbed the keys and was on her way.

********************

San Francisco, California
San Francisco Memorial Hospital

Sara was happy to duck by the emergency room entrance of San Francisco Memorial
Hospital and finally enter through the real front sliding glass doors.   She had
spent way too many nights following leads into the ER only to lose them moments
later.  She quickly made her way to the reception desk and questioned the middle
aged, curly haired blonde woman who had a habit of snapping her gum while she
was in the middle of a sentence.

“Benjamin Herrara, please,” Sara inquired.   “Might be under Ramirez.”

“Yes, that would be the pediatrics unit,” the woman answered after typing into
her computer for a moment.   “Cancer wing.   Fourth floor.   Follow the signs,”
she smiled and snapped her gum.

“Thanks,” Sara said and headed for the elevator.

Stepping out onto the fourth floor, the eerie smell of disinfectant crept
through her nostrils like a poisonous gas.   Staring at the bustle of doctors
and the abundance of full rooms, Sara realized that she had spent way too much
time in hospitals lately.   She was flooded with memories of her own shooting
and kidnapping and while it was still hard for her to digest they were just
memories and somehow lacked any concrete reality.  Like they had just been a bad
dream gone worse and now had seemingly disappeared save for appearing in bits
and pieces here and there.

Rounding the third corner, Sara saw a short, curly-haired Latino woman leaning
against the wall near a half closed door.   Her arms were crossed over her chest
and she was looking in the other direction.  Sara took a deep breath and managed
a smile as she continued to approach the woman.

“See something interesting down there, Ramirez?” Sara asked as she got closer.

“Just waiting for Gabe to come back,” Magda answered, paused, and then finally
looked at who was approaching her.   “Sara?” she asked and then smiled widely.

“In the flesh,” Sara answered and accepted the warm hug the shorter woman
offered.

“What are you doing here?” Magda asked, pulling back.

“Cruising hospitals,” Sara answered with a shrug.   “Thought I might as well
take in a spinal tap while I’m here.”

“Thank you, but you don’t have to do that.”

“Please, it’s the least I can do,” Sara insisted.   “So, let’s see the rock,”
she added and tugged at Magda’s left hand.   “We were all wondering when Gabe
would get his head out of his ass and make an honest woman out of you.”

“God, it’s great to see you,” Magda said, squeezing Sara’s hand tightly.  “Where
are you staying?”

“CD’s.   For now.”

“She called earlier.  She didn’t say anything.”

“She’s not talking to me right now,” Sara admitted, nodding.

“What’d you do this time?” Magda raised an eyebrow.

“What do I always do?”

“Opened your mouth again, huh?” Magda teased.

“Yeah,” Sara nodded and smiled.   “So where do I sign up for the excruciating
pain?”

“Right this way,” Magda answered, keeping a hold of Sara’s hand and leading her
down the hallway.



A few hours later, Sara stuck her head into Ben’s room and kissed Magda on the
cheek goodbye.  She was about halfway through the lobby when she swore she could
hear someone calling her name.  She stopped and turned around.

“Sara, hold up,” came the voice again.

“Hey,” Sara said, seeing Jinny approach from the other side of the lobby.

“I just heard what you did for Magda,” she said, coming to stop a few feet in
front of Sara.  “That was really great of you.”

“Everyone else’s been tested,” Sara replied.   “It’s really no big deal. 
Besides, having needles jammed into my spinal column is a hobby of mine,” she
smiled.

“Right.   CD told me you like pain,” Jinny answered.   “You have time for a
really awful cup of coffee?”

“Absolutely,” Sara answered and followed the shorter brunette to the cafeteria.

“Wow this coffee really is bad,” Sara commented once they had grabbed a table
and two steaming Styrofoam cups.

“I told you,” Jinny replied.

“Nah, you haven’t had really bad coffee until you’ve had the pleasure of
Catherine’s three day old recycled roast,” Sara said and immediately wished she
hadn’t.

“She’s the reason you came here?”

“It wasn’t so much coming here as it was running from there.  As CD felt the
need to point out to me the second I stepped off the plane.”

“She doesn’t hold back,” Jinny took a gulp of her coffee and peered into it,
rolling the cup in her hands.   “Listen, since I stopped drinking I haven’t been
a very social person.   I have a hard time trusting anyone…in fact; I have no
idea why I’m even telling you this.”

“I do,” Sara nodded.  “You see something in me that you recognize in yourself.  
I saw it the first day I met you.”

“Yeah, what’s that?”

“Fear,” Sara said simply and took a drink of her coffee aware of Jinny’s eyes on
her once again.  “You try to hide it with your game face, but it’s still there
under the surface.   We’re not as tough as we want everyone to think we are.  
No one is.”

“Yeah,” Jinny nodded and turned her eyes back to the cup.  “With all this stuff
going on with Magda and my rehab…and trying to readjust to living…I’m just
really trying to hold it all together for everyone…to be strong.   And it’s
hard, you know?  But CD…she’s been there the whole way.”

“And you’re not sure how to feel about it,” Sara stated more than asked.

“No, I’m sure how I feel about it,” Jinny picked up her eyes, revealing an
unbidden intensity that was staggering.   “That’s what scares me.  We’re
treading very dangerous ground; work, her baggage, my baggage.   Same sex
relationships in an old boys profession never go well.  I mean everyone in the
Division…we’ve been working together for more than a few years now, but with the
rest of the system the way it is we’re still a couple steps up from
complicated.”

“Look, if it’s one thing I’ve learned in the past year it’s that the world is a
very fucked up place,” Sara said and held Jinny’s eyes.  “But the one thing that
really matters at the end of the day isn’t all the bullshit you’ve been through.
The thing that makes living in this world bearable is coming home to the one
person who understands you so well you don’t even have to say anything.   And
once her arms are around you and you’re safe everything seems to make sense.”

“What I’m trying to say,” Sara leaned forward, “is that sooner or later you’re
going to have to take a risk because it’s worth it.   And you’ll never know how
great it can be unless you stop making excuses for why it won’t work and take
the chance that it will.   Because being a workaholic and coming home to an
empty apartment every night isn’t just incredibly lonely, it’s a sorry way to
live your life.”

Sara sat back, drained the rest of her coffee, and almost winced at the
bitterness it brought to her mouth.   Running a hand over her face, she was hit
with the realization that what she had just said was in fact the truth.   That
when all the superficial bullshit of the world falls away, the only thing that’s
left…the really important thing…is the connection between two people who would
rather suffer the torment of a thousand hells than be without each other. 
Lawsuits, custody battles, the pushing and pulling…the occasional lonely night,
heated argument, harsh word…death and work and misunderstanding…pain.   It
doesn’t matter.  Too bad Sara couldn’t take her own advice.  She was snapped out
of her reverie by the sound of Jinny’s fingernails drumming on the table
feverishly.

“You’re right,” she said and got to her feet, tossing her cup in the trash.

“I know,” Sara managed a smile and followed suit.

“I’ve gotta run,” Jinny said.   “We recovered a triangular based paper weight
from a dumpster near the Garcia’s apartment.  Weighs about five pounds.  Blood
and prints are being tested as we speak.”

“CD must be pretty happy.   I know this case had her a little rattled, too.”

“Yeah,” Jinny said and turned to leave.   “Hey, you wanna come to the station
with me?” she asked, turning back.

“I don’t think so,” Sara answered.   “We, uh, sort of got into it a little last
night.”

“What’d you fight about?”

“You, actually,” Sara admitted with a small laugh.   “I told her to stop sitting
on her hands and she didn’t really appreciate it as much as I thought she
would.”

“What’d she say?” Jinny asked, curiosity peaked.

“Same stuff you just said only louder and in a way more irritated tone,” Sara
answered.  “And she didn’t say I was right at the end, either.”

“She’s still got issues with you,” Jinny stated.   “That’s one thing I do know.”

“Yeah,” Sara nodded and frowned.

“So, I’ll see ya,” Jinny said stepping backward.   “And Sara, go home.  You know
this isn’t it,” she added with a smile and turned.

“Jinny, wait a second,” Sara quickly caught up with her and grabbed her arm
lightly.  “Thank you,” she said, once she had turned the cop around to face her.

“For what?”

Sara opened her mouth, but the air was soon filled with the static noise from
Jinny’s two-way.  There was the high-pitched voice of the dispatcher followed by
more crackling and then the cutting in of a very familiar voice that sent both
women into a sudden panic.

“This is unit seven in pursuit of suspect, driving north on Martin Street,” CD’s
voice boomed from the scanner.  “Suspect refuses to stop, speed increasing.  
Send backup immediately.”

“Martin Street ,” Jinny repeated.  “That’s Juan Sanchez’s neighborhood.”

“Let’s go,” Sara said and moved quickly towards the exit.

“Wait,” Jinny grabbed her and held her back.   “You can’t go anywhere.”

“Come on, Jinny,” Sara said in disbelief.   “It’s CD.”

“I know, but you don’t have jurisdiction here,” the shorter brunette answered. 
“You don’t have jurisdiction anywhere anymore and I can’t take a civilian with
me on a high speed chase.”

“The last things we said to each other were in anger,” Sara explained with a
determined look.  “You’re not leaving this hospital unless I’m sitting in the
seat next to you.”

“Fine,” Jinny said reluctantly, gritting her teeth.   “Buckle up, hold on, and
if we stop you stay in the car,” she instructed as they walked out of the
hospital.  She grabbed Sara’s arm and roughly pulled her to a stop.   “You stay
in the car.  You understand?” she reiterated in a dangerous voice.   “We’re not
in Vegas anymore.”

“Sure, I understand,” Sara answered and followed Jinny into the sedan.

********************

Las Vegas, Nevada

“You have everything?” Stacey asked as she dropped Catherine off at the airport.
Lindsey bounced up and down in her seat, smiling.

“Uh, yeah,” Catherine answered, checking everything.   “Clothes, ticket, heart
on my sleeve.   I think I’m all set.”

“You sure you want to do this?” her sister asked.

“Yes, I’m sure.  Positive,” Catherine replied.  “I have to do this.  I’m not
coming home without her so…”

“I’ll take care of Linds as long as you need me to,” Stacey said and gave
Catherine a quick tight hug.   “I’m proud of you, Cath,” she said, pulling back.

Catherine smiled, pulled open the passenger side door and leaned down to pull
Lindsey to her in a warm, playful hug.   She released the young girl and kissed
her on both cheeks and the top of her head.

“Mom,” Lindsey laughed and touched Catherine’s face.

“I hope I’m not too long, kiddo,” Catherine said.   “I’ll call you every day.”

“Tell Sara I’m waiting for her,” Lindsey said, playing with the chain around
Catherine’s neck.  “Make her promise to come home.”

“I’m gonna try, baby,” Catherine answered, blinking back tears and smiling.  “I
love you,” she said and kissed her daughter a few more times.

“I love you too, Mommy,” Lindsey said as Catherine closed the door.

“I’ll call you when I get in,” Catherine said to Stacey and headed for the
entrance.

“Good luck,” Stacey called after her and watched her disappear into the dense
mass of bodies.

********************

San Francisco, California

“Nate, come on.  You drive like my grandmother,” CD shouted, adjusting her
seatbelt to lean forward and place the radio handset back in the holder.

“Jesus, will you please shut up and let me drive?” Nate yelled back and gripped
the wheel harder as his foot leaned on the gas.

“We’re losing him,” CD said, watching the blue Cavalier speed further into the
distance.  “Gas is on the right, Nate.  Let’s go.”

“You really are a pain in the ass, CD.   You know that?” Nate shot at her while
weaving in and out of traffic, narrowly missing the bumper of a mint green Saab.

“So I’ve been told,” she replied, gripping the dashboard as Nate sped up and
came within a few hundred feet of the suspect.   “There, he’s turning,” she
pointed as the Cavalier pulled a corner recklessly and disappeared.

Nate followed the car, hitting the gas instead of the brake as he rounded the
corner.  Before he could even think, the telephone pole came upon them.   CD
braced herself with her arms out wide as she saw Nate grit his teeth and hit the
brakes.  It was too late.  The impact sent the airbags popping and a loud
crunching sound reverberated in the air around them.  

A few moments later, CD managed to push the airbag away from her body and
release the seatbelt.  Turning her head to the left, she saw Nate slumped
against the deflated airbag, his head resting against the steering wheel.   A
steady stream of blood was evident on the side of his face.   CD grabbed the
radio receiver and yelled into it quickly.

“This is unit seven,” she said, still trying to catch her breath.  “On the
corner of Martin and Eastwood.  Suspect still on the move.  I need an ambulance
now,” she said.  “There’s been an accident. Officer down.   I repeat, officer
down.”

CD checked to make sure Nate still had a pulse and then looked out the
windshield at their surroundings.   Her eyes stopped on the blue Cavalier with
its front end stuck between a fire hydrant and another car.  A tall Hispanic
male with a red windbreaker on stumbled from the car and made his way as fast as
he could into an abandoned broken down building near the wrecked car. 

CD ripped her own door open and placed unsteady feet on the pavement.  Leaning
forward to pull herself to her feet, CD felt a sharp pain across her chest to
her midsection.   Peering into her shirt, she saw the deep purple seatbelt
bruise and winced.  Watching the red figure across the street disappear through
a side window of the building, CD used the door to pull herself to her feet and
started off across the street after him.  When she reached the window, she
pulled herself up and inside only to find herself surrounded by darkness.

********************

“Officer down,” boomed from the radio as Sara and Jinny sped to the criminal
underbelly of the city.

“Shit,” Jinny said as she applied a generous weight to the gas pedal.  Sara
watched the speedometer climb to just over ninety miles an hour as they flew
through dense San Francisco traffic.

“Dammit, Exstead,” Sara said, gripping her seat.   “This isn’t Formula One.”

“I’m sorry I guess I skipped over the part where you shut the fuck up when
you’re in my car in my list of previous demands,” Jinny replied, pulling the
wheel back and forth to avoid oncoming traffic.

Jinny drove relentlessly until they reached the scene of the accident.  Slamming
on the brakes and throwing the car in park, they realized they were the first on
the scene.   Jinny immediately ran to the demolished dark blue sedan and reached
in to check on Nate.  She found him conscious and attempting to speak as Sara
ran up to her side.

“CD,” Nate mumbled and opened his eyes only a slit before closing them again.

“Hold on, Nate,” Jinny said and looked around the street for help and to see if
she could locate the missing amazon cop.   Instead she saw Sara inspecting a
blue Cavalier across the street and hustled over to her.

“I thought I made it perfectly clear that you stay in the car,” Jinny shouted at
Sara, who was kneeling down near the open door.

“There’s a blood trail,” Sara answered, pointing from the door to the droplets
on the ground.  “Looks like they go directly to that building over there,” she
said and started toward it.

“Stop,” Jinny commanded and grabbed Sara’s arm tightly to hold her back.  “You
can’t go in there.”

“The fuck I can’t,” Sara set her jaw and pulled her arm out of Jinny’s grasp
roughly.

“Give me your hand,” Jinny demanded, staring Sara down, the two women locked in
a war of wills.

“What?”

“Give me your fucking hand,” Jinny shouted, pulling the cuffs from her waist.

“I don’t think so,” Sara pulled away.

They were stuck in a staring match when two shots rang out one right after the
other, rapid fire.   They both turned their heads to the building, frozen in
place as the next shot rang out a few seconds later.   Without another word,
both Jinny and Sara rushed towards the broken window and took almost no time
climbing inside.   Sara hit the first floor of the abandoned building with a
hard thud, allowing Jinny to help her to her feet.  She followed close behind
the brunette cop as she shone a flashlight around the wide open space.  It
looked like a small warehouse.  Hearing a scuffling on the floor above them,
Jinny flashed the light on a rickety staircase on the far side of the room. 
Moments later they were on the second floor and face to face with overwhelming
fear.

Jinny pulled Sara down behind a small overturned table quickly, killing her
light when she realized the sunlight was pouring through a broken window close
to the middle of the room.  Peering up over the edge, they saw CD standing in
front of Juan Sanchez, both had their guns drawn and pointed at each other.  
Neither of them seemed to be hurt.   Sara shifted like she was about to move.

“Wait, you’re not armed,” Jinny held her down.

“So?” Sara commented.

“So everyone else in this room is,” Jinny pointed out.   “It’s not safe.”

“It never is.”

“Stay here,” Jinny instructed and peered up over the table again.

“I can’t,” Sara answered.   “It’s CD,” she stated with fear in her eyes.

“I know,” Jinny answered, the same fear reflecting back.   “Will you forgive
me?”

“Huh?” Sara asked in confusion, not ready for the impact of Jinny’s service
weapon colliding with her temple.   She hit the floor hard and didn’t remember
much after that.

The smacking sound broke the hard silence that had engulfed the building and
caused CD to turn suddenly to see Jinny standing up, gun braced in both hands. 
Juan Sanchez took that as his opportunity to turn the tables and knocked CD’s
gun out of her hands right before throwing an arm around her neck and pulling
her against him, facing her in the direction of the short brunette.   With his
gun raised to the side of her head, CD drew a long deep breath and couldn’t
manage to let it go.

“Drop the gun and let her go, Juan,” Jinny said, taking tentative steps forward.
“You don’t want to do this.”

“Stay back or I’ll shoot her,” he answered, sweat pouring down his face.  “I
swear I will.   I’ll shoot her,” he emphasized by pressing the barrel into CD’s
temple, making her flinch.

“Let her go, Juan,” Jinny repeated and kept advancing.   “I know you didn’t mean
to kill Carmen.   Everyone knows.”

“Fuck,” he said and shook his head.   “I didn’t mean it.   I didn’t.  One minute
we were just talking and then…God there was so much blood.   I killed my baby,”
he said and released his grip slightly.

Jinny kept creeping forward, her eyes stuck to CD’s in a silent promise that
everything would be alright.   She nodded, noticing CD swallow hard and shift
slightly in the young man’s arms.  Jinny stopped when she saw Juan Sanchez’s
eyes fly open, warning her to stay put.

“Don’t come any closer,” he warned, pointing the gun at Jinny and then back to
CD, gripping her shoulder tighter.   “Drop your gun.”

“Don’t drop your gun, Jin,” CD managed in a strangled tone.

“You, shut the fuck up,” Sanchez warned and pressed the barrel into her neck so
hard she was sure it would leave a scar.

“Juan, you’re already in enough trouble,” Jinny said.   “Do you really want to
kill a cop?   That’s a capital offense.  You’ll get the death penalty.  You
think Carmen would want that for you?”

“Why not?” he countered.   “I killed her.  I killed the baby.  Oh God I killed
the baby,” he said and his face crumbled.

What happened next would replay in both Jinny and CD’s minds for a long time to
come.  It was like it happened in slow motion.  Juan Sanchez grabbed CD’s
shoulder and pulled her away from him, throwing her back into the wall behind
him.  She hit the wall hard, collapsing to her knees and holding her midsection.
  Juan stared Jinny fearfully in the eyes as he raised the gun to the side of
his own head and cocked the hammer.   As soon as he closed his eyes, she
screamed and lunged forward, grabbing the gun at the last second and banging his
arm against the concrete wall as hard as she could, using her momentum for more
force.   He struggled against her, but three or four hard knocks later, the gun
dropped from his hand and onto the floor.   Jinny kicked it away and threw Juan
Sanchez to the ground making sure to squeeze the cuffs until he screamed.

With the suspect incapacitated and in custody, Jinny turned her attention to the
blonde doubled over on her knees next to the wall.  Rushing to her side, Jinny
put an arm around CD’s shoulders and raised her to a sitting position.   She
placed shaking hands on either side of the blonde’s face, pushing the hair out
of her eyes, and leaned forward to seize soft lips in a searing and confident
kiss.  CD’s lips gave her up willingly and after a breathless few moments, Jinny
pulled back.

“I was so worried that I was going to lose you,” she blurted out, a sudden
realization of truth.   CD searched until she held the brunette’s hand safely in
her own.   “Before I could…”

“I know.  Me too,” she replied.  “There are some things I need to tell you…”

“So do I,” Jinny replied quickly, feeling the air around her grow thick.

CD raised up to her knees and fell into Jinny’s willing arms, holding her
tightly and breathing in the scent of earth and spice.  She could finally
breathe again.  CD exhaled heavily and gathered the material of Jinny’s coat in
her hands roughly.

Sara came to just in time to see the two cops locked in a gentle embrace, their
lips searching and finding each other once and again.  She smiled and used the
sleeve of her shirt to wipe the blood from her temple.   Jinny Exstead had a
nasty right hook.   And it looked like Juan Sanchez was proof of that now too.

********************

Four hours and an Emergency Room visit later, the three women were finally on
their way back to CD’s condo.   Sara walked in front of the other two up the
narrow path to the front door.  CD had her arm around Jinny’s shoulders for
support.  She had broken two ribs and Nate had luckily escaped with only a
concussion.   Juan Sanchez was hauled off to the station for booking and Sara
had yet another head injury to add to the list.

As they approached the dark doorstep, Sara noticed a shadowy figure huddled near
the stairs.  As she got closer, whoever it was got to their feet and Sara was
almost positive she wouldn’t be able to take another step.   CD and Jinny slowed
as they came up close behind her, peering into the darkness in confusion.

“Hey,” the figure spoke, taking a step into the streetlight.

“Catherine?” Sara said in disbelief, stopping dead in her tracks.

“You didn’t tell me she was blonde,” CD commented close to Sara’s ear.  “You
really are a glutton for punishment, aren’t you?”

“What happened?” Catherine asked, taking a step closer and noticing the bandage
over Sara’s eye.

“It’s nothing, really,” Sara insisted, touching the wound and wincing.  “Exstead
hit me in the face with her gun,” she said motioning to Jinny, who had an arm
hooked tightly around CD’s waist.

“It was for her own protection, I swear,” Jinny said with a small smile.

“Oh, come on,” CD said.   “We all know Sara’s head is way too thick to sustain
any real head trauma.”

“I think I like her,” Catherine smiled.

“Oh yeah, right,” Sara said nervously, running her hands over her jeans. 
“Catherine Willows this is Jinny Exstead,” she motioned to the brunette.   “And
CD DeLorenzo,” she motioned to the limping blonde.   “The best cops San
Francisco has to offer.”

“I’d shake your hand, but I don’t think I have the energy,” CD said with a
smile.

“And my hands seem to be full,” Jinny teased and placed a hand on CD’s stomach,
steering her towards the door.   “I should get her to bed.”

“Yeah, you definitely should,” Sara commented with a wide grin.

“It was nice to finally meet you, Catherine,” CD said as she passed her and
stepped through the front door.

“So…” Catherine began once they were alone in the front yard.

“Yeah,” Sara agreed.  “What are you doing here?” she asked and shoved her hands
deep within her pockets.

“I told you I wasn’t giving up,” Catherine answered, very seriously.

“So you just dropped everything to come out here?”

“It was worth it,” Catherine replied, taking a step closer.   “You are worth
it.”

“I wasn’t worth it last week when you threw me to the sidelines because of your
legal trouble,” Sara said bitterly.   “Why should I believe you now?  Just
because Eddie’s gone now, it doesn’t mean he won’t be back in a few months to
stir things up again.”

“We don’t have to worry about him anymore,” Catherine stated.

“How can you say that?” Sara said loudly.

“Because Nick called about ten minutes after I landed,” the blonde explained. 
“They found Eddie’s body about two hours ago in an alley behind the Taj Mahal.  
Someone shot him in the chest six times.”

“Shit, Catherine,” Sara said, immediately wanting to kick herself in the ass. 
She stepped forward and placed a warm hand on Catherine’s shoulder, regret and
longing hanging in the air around them.

“Don’t,” Catherine pulled away.   “I refuse to cry for him.  I refuse to feel
for him and you’re not going to either,” she said angrily and turned away.

“He was your husband at one point, Catherine,” Sara said gently.  “It’s okay to
feel for him.”

“And what if I just don’t?” Catherine answered, hugging herself.  “Is that okay
too?   Is it okay that I’m glad he’s gone so he can never come back and fuck up
my life again?” she turned around and cast intense blue eyes on Sara.

“Yes, it’s okay,” Sara said firmly, pulling Catherine into her arms and holding
her tightly.  She only relaxed when she felt Catherine’s arms sliding around her
waist holding her back.  “God, I’ve missed you.”

“What are you doing here?” Catherine breathed against her chest.

“I thought you didn’t want me anymore and I just had to leave,” Sara said, her
voice wavering.

“You didn’t give me any time to explain anything…to deal with the consequences
of my actions,” Catherine said, pulling back but not breaking their contact. 
“It didn’t even take me a day to realize that I had made a mistake.   The second
I saw you walking away I knew I wanted to go after you.”

“I’m willing to fight the world for you,” she added, clasping Sara’s hands in
her own.  “I would never not want you.   In fact, I know that I want you
forever.”

“You can’t say that, Catherine, if you don’t mean it,” Sara closed her eyes and
took a deep breath.

“I don’t say anything I don’t mean,” she replied.   “You know that.”

“This is just so hard…so confusing,” Sara shook her head.   “I’ve been trying to
find a reason not to take you back, maybe because I’m just scared…maybe because
I think you need to suffer a little…but with you standing right here in front of
me I can’t think of any reason why I shouldn’t just get on the next plane back
to Vegas.”

“I know I can’t ask you just to forget what happened and what I did,” Catherine
said.  “And I know it’s going to take time for us to get back where we were.  
That it might be just like starting over again, but whatever it takes for you to
come home I’ll do it.  I’ll do anything, Sara.  Just come back with me.”

“Being here has opened my eyes to a lot of things,” Sara replied.  “And I don’t
want to make the same mistakes all over again.  I don’t want to give up an
amazing thing just because I’m scared.   I know that I love you and I never
should have walked away.   I…”

“Shh,” Catherine silenced Sara with a gentle finger to her lips.  “Don’t you
dare apologize to me.  I was the one who was wrong.”

Catherine leaned up slowly, giving Sara a chance to back away if she wanted to. 
Sara calmed those fears by meeting her halfway, their lips connecting slowly and
tentatively at first, like they were learning each other all over again.   Soon,
any reservations they had were stripped away by their need and desire for each
other, their tongues meeting and teasing each other not in a struggle for
dominance but in a subtle dance of comfort and forgiveness.   They separated
long enough to replenish their oxygen, Sara still struggling for breath as she
took Catherine’s face in her hands and looked deeply into her eyes.

“Promise me you’ll never let me go again,” she said softly.

“Promise me you’ll never run away again,” Catherine answered just as quietly.

Sara brought their lips together in a kiss that would prove that promise to be a
deal not to be broken by any circumstance that had come before or would come
again in the future.

“I can’t believe how much I love you,” Catherine said when they pulled apart.

“Neither can I,” Sara admitted with a smile that fell away as quickly as it
came.   “What are you going to tell Lindsey?”

“I don’t know,” Catherine shook her head.   “I was hoping you might have some
suggestions.   Come back to the hotel with me?” she asked desire hiding behind
the longing in her eyes.

“I am pretty tired,” Sara answered with a smile.  “Just let me grab my stuff.”

Sara picked up her bag and jacket and stuck her head into CD’s bedroom just long
enough to see Jinny Exstead curled around the tall blonde.  They were both still
fully clothed, Jinny’s head resting gently on CD’s chest as they both slept
soundly.  Sara smiled and closed the door quietly, making sure to lock the front
door on her way out.   As Catherine took her hand and led her to the rental car,
Sara looked back at the condo and realized that taking this time off had
definitely not been a waste.

********************

“I predicted this too, you know?” McCafferty said as she passed by Sara to the
doorway of her office.

“I’ll bet you did,” Sara smiled.

“You take care of yourself,” the older woman said, closing her door halfway and
then peeking her head back out.  “You’ve always got a job somewhere in this
department if you want it.”

“Thanks, Captain,” Sara nodded.   “I’ll remember that.”

“You better,” McCafferty gave a small smile and closed the door.

“I always knew she had a thing for you,” CD whispered in Sara’s ear. 

“Shut up,” Sara pushed her away.   “Nate, get well soon,” she said turning to
the bruised man sitting at his desk.  “And hold onto this one with two hands,”
she motioned to CD.  “She’s about to cut loose.”

“I think I can manage,” Nate tried smiling but it hurt too much. 

“What time’s your flight?” CD asked.

“I’ve got time for coffee,” Sara offered and led CD into the hallway.

They got two cups of coffee to go from the diner across the street and decided
to go for a walk instead of sitting still.   It took a couple of blocks for Sara
to find her voice and finally say all the things she had ever wanted to say.

“For what it’s worth, I was in love with you too, CD,” she said, holding her cup
in one hand and sticking the other into her coat pocket.  “And my leaving didn’t
change that.  It took me a long time to get over you.”

“I resented you for months after you took that job,” CD replied, keeping step
and looking forward.   “I blamed myself for your leaving…it was hard,” she said
and paused.   “But in order to forgive myself I had to forgive you first.”

“I’m not sure I deserve that.”

“You don’t,” CD smiled.   “But I think everything worked out for the best.”

“C, I don’t want you to make the same mistakes I did,” Sara stopped and turned
to look at her friend.   “I don’t want you to walk away from someone you love
just because you’re afraid it’s going to end badly.  You have to just close your
eyes and step off the edge, you know?   Because if you don’t, you’re just going
to miss out on what could be the best thing to ever happen to you.”

“God, if you had just known about all the times I wish you’d have felt that way
about me,” CD joked.  

“I think once upon a time I did,” Sara admitted.  

“But that time’s over now,” CD nodded.   “We’ve both moved on.”

“We have,” Sara agreed.  

“Just promise me you’ll call every once and a while,” CD said, as they headed
back to the station.

“Scouts honor,” Sara said, holding up two fingers.   “And you promise me that
you’ll give Exstead half a chance to get all the way in there,” she said, poking
CD in the chest with a sharp finger as they arrived in front of the building.

“We have an uphill battle on the way, but I plan on giving it a try,” CD said
with a smile.  “It was really great to see you again, Sar.   I didn’t quite
realize how much I missed you.”

“I know,” Sara nodded and smiled.   “Things are funny that way.”

“Yes they are,” CD said and pulled Sara into a long, tight embrace.  “Take care
of yourself in Vegas.  They call it Sin City for a reason.”

“So I’ve learned,” Sara said and pulled back.

“No you haven’t,” CD smiled widely and jogged up the steps without looking back.

Sara turned around, her arm up to hail a cab when she saw Jinny Exstead slamming
a guy in cuffs against the side of a squad car.   The cab stopped at the curb. 
Sara opened the door slowly and looked to the side to see Jinny staring at her
with her hands stuck in her pants pockets.   Sara paused and stared back,
flashing the other woman a wide smile and giving her a small wave.  Jinny just
gave a lopsided grin and a nod of her head and turned back to her suspect.   As
Sara ducked into the waiting car, she broke the cardinal rule of leaving.  She
looked back.

********************

Las Vegas, Nevada

“You owe me five days,” Grissom said, tearing up Sara’s resignation letter and
dropping it in the trash can next to his desk.

“Come on, Grissom.  I’m sure I’ve got five vacations days shoved somewhere,”
Sara pleaded.

“Yeah, up your ass maybe,” he replied with a grin.

“Something happen to you while I was gone?” Sara smiled back.

“What?  I’ve always been this funny,” he answered, nonchalantly.   “You’ll
probably need these,” he said reaching into his desk drawer and pulling out her
gun and badge and dropping them into her hands.   “Tonight,” he added.  “For
your first official shift after returning from your vacation.”

“Tonight?   You’re joking, right?”

“Assignments are up in twenty minutes,” he shook his head.

“I just got off a three hour flight,” Sara whined.

“I gave Catherine the night off so you’ll just have to cover,” Grissom smiled.

“You are an evil, evil little man,” Sara grinned and made her way to the door.

“Good to see you too,” Grissom called after her.


“Hey, I dropped a pair of panties on the way in.   You didn’t happen to come
across any did you?” Sara asked, sticking her head into the DNA lab to find Greg
with his back to her.

“I’m wearing them, actually,” he started to say and then stopped, his body
stiffening.  He turned around slowly, the biggest grin he had ever sported
playing wildly on his face.  “You’re a mirage, right?” he asked.  “I just need a
glass of water and you’ll disappear.”

“I hope not,” Sara answered with a smile.   “I just got my job back.”

Greg practically sprinted across the lab, throwing his arms around Sara so hard
that they careened into the door behind her and stumbled backwards into the
hallway.  Sara teetered, but Greg tightened his hold even more to make sure she
didn’t fall.  She tried to pull back, but he wouldn’t let go.

“Greg, I was only gone for like a week,” she said, pushing against his shoulder
lightly.

“That was seven days too long,” he replied, lifting her off her feet and
spinning her around before letting go.   “What are you doing here?”

“I figured I owe you a beer or two…”she paused and smiled.   “Hundred.  Come
on,” she tugged his hand.

“I’m working,” he pulled back.

“So, Grissom just gave you the night off.”

“No, he didn’t.”

“Are you really going to make me beg?” Sara asked, raising an eyebrow.

“It is tempting now that you mention it,” he pondered for a moment.   “But no,”
he smiled wickedly and tore off his lab coat, rolling it up into a ball and
throwing it behind him.   “If Grissom asks, I’m telling him you handcuffed me,”
he added, following her down the hallway.

“I’m only that kinky behind closed doors,” Sara turned to look at him and almost
bumped directly into Nick.

“Where are you two going?” Nick asked with a smile and steadied her with strong
hands, as he and Warrick passed on their way towards the break room.

“City sanctioned field trip,” Sara answered quickly.   “Grissom signed our
permission slips,” she laughed.

“Right,” Warrick said and squeezed her shoulder affectionately on his way past. 
“Have one for me,” he smiled.

“Aye aye, Captain,” Greg saluted and smiled before Sara grabbed his arm and
pulled him out into the parking lot.

They walked to her car in an excited silence, both Sara and Greg feeling
comfortable and more than a little elated.   Sara looked at Greg, smiled, and
then looked at the sky and smiled.   She could see the flashing lights of the
strip in the distance and was hit with an overwhelming sense of belonging.

“What are you thinking?” Greg asked, draping an arm over her shoulders.

“It’s good to be home,” Sara answered without hesitation.

END.

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