Title: Second Chance: Breaking
By: nancy
Pairing; Gil/Nick
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: non-graphic descriptions of torture
Series: Second Chance: Miracle, Second Chance: Breaking Away, Second Chance: Misonceptions, Second Chances: Fear, Second Chance: Captured
Summary: Experiments, revelations, and loads of pain, oh my!

Nick screamed and shouted for them to stop, struggling violently against the chains binding him to the wall. The iron shackles groaned and creaked, but held, even against his strength. In the next room, visible through a window, Gil was getting the beating of a lifetime. It was vicious and brutal, designed to inflict pain, but not a lot of damage. Gil was hanging in the straps that kept him upright, unconscious for the second time.

The torture stopped the moment Gil went under, but a bucket of water brought him around again only moments later. Groggy and barely able to hold his head upright, Gil struggled weakly when his right hand was taken by his tormentor and the first finger broken in two places.

“That’s enough.”

Nick heard the two words, but they didn’t penetrate right away. It wasn’t until the bastard hurting Gil moved away from his lover that he realized things were over, at least for the time being. He looked over at the man beside him in the observation room and if he could have killed Becker right then and there, he would have.

“Now that’s a good look for you,” Becker observed, grinning. “That’s the look we’re hoping to see a lot more often.”

“What do you want?” Nick asked for what had to be the hundredth time.

Becker stepped closer, but stayed out of reach. “You know what we want, Nick. We want your cooperation.”

Nick forced himself to stand upright and answered, “I’ve given you that!”

“Bullshit. You’re holding back and we know it. We know that you’re capable of a lot more than you’ve shown us, Nick, we’re just not sure how much more. We want to measure every single facet of your abilities and every time you shut us down, we’re going to hurt Mr. Grissom. Badly. I wonder how much he can take? He’s not a young man anymore, you know.”

Nick lunged at the other man, drawn up short by the chains.

“Should I have him start up on Mr. Grissom again?” Becker questioned, putting his hand over the intercom button in the wall.

Looking through the window where Gil hung limp and weak in his bonds, Nick felt something break inside and shook his head. He couldn’t make Gil go through that again, would have given them anything at the first punch, had promised to do so after the second, but Becker had ignored him and let the beating go on and on. Just to prove the point that they were helpless and he had all the power. “Please, just let him go. Don’t hurt him anymore. Whatever you want, I’ll do it.”

“And if we wanted you to kill for us?”

Nick met the other man’s eyes and replied sincerely, “Give me a gun and tell me who to point it at.”

A terrible, triumphant look surfaced on Becker’s face as he shook his head. “That won’t be necessary just yet. For now, we’ll get Mr. Grissom the medical care he needs and you will go back to your room. If we even think that you’re holding back again, Mr. Grissom will wish that he’d never been born.”

Nick nodded his understanding, then asked, “Can I see him? Please? I just…I really need to see him.”

Scornful, Becker agreed, “You can see him in a couple of weeks. Once you’ve proven that you’re cooperating, I’ll let you have a day with him. Soak it up, because you’re going to be too busy after that to see him for a long time.”

Armed guards entered on some unseen signal and released him from the chains, shoving him out of the small room and walking him down the hall. It didn’t take long to get back to his small, barely furnished room and once inside, Nick sat on the cot and put his head in his hands.

The last month had been a nightmare, culminating in this afternoon’s horror. He’d been poked and prodded and not allowed to even catch a glimpse of Gil the entire time. They’d had that one afternoon together and nothing more. He ached to hold his lover, to reconnect with Gil in any way, but that wasn’t possible. Something inside had been dying, these last weeks, and this afternoon had finished it off.

Curling up on the cot, Nick pulled the covers up around himself and huddled under them, staring at the wall. There had to be a way out, there had to be. He wasn’t going to stop looking for a way to get Gil to safety. He’d go along with whatever they wanted, he’d give them everything, but he was going to take, too. He was going to use their own fears and isolation against them and force a solution to present itself.

They could measure his body, but they had no idea that his brain had been affected as well.

* * * *

The next couple of weeks were just as busy as Becker had promised, but Nick didn’t care. He used the time in ways that they had no clue about. He made a mental map of every single area that he as brought into. He learned lock pass-codes by sound alone. He did everything that they asked of him, and then gave a little extra beside, just to make sure that they didn’t think he was skimping out on them.

Nick was invariably exhausted and wrung out, mentally and physically by the end of each day, but it was worth it. Almost two weeks to the day, Becker finally agreed to let him see Gil the next day. He was promised the whole day with his lover on the condition that the following day would see him extra buckled-down to work.

Gil looked pale and fragile against the pillows, sleeping restlessly when Nick arrived that morning. Thankfully, they’d put him back in that room from before and Gil was as comfortable as he could be, given the circumstances. Nick sat on the edge of the bed and brushed his fingers through Gil’s hair. His lover flinched in his sleep and pulled away as he woke up.

When Gil’s eyes widened in recognition, Nick smiled and greeted, “Hey baby, it’s good to see you.”

Gil launched himself at Nick, throwing his arms around Nick’s neck and holding tight. Nick’s arms went around his lover’s waist and he held on carefully, not wanting to put pressure on anything that might still hurt.

“You’re alive, oh God, you’re still alive,” Gil breathed, finally pulling back. Searching his eyes, Gil frowned and continued, “What happened? What’s changed?”

Nick cupped Gil’s face in his hand and whispered, “I won’t let them hurt you again, baby, I won’t. I’m gonna take care of everything, I promise.”

Shaking his head, Gil exclaimed, “No, Nick, don’t give in to them! Don’t, I can’t lose you too!”

“You haven’t lost me, Gil, and you’re not going to,” Nick stated.

Suddenly looking every year of his age, Gil shook his head and replied, “The first time you kill for them, you’re going to hate yourself. And then you’re going to hate me. Nick please, don’t do it. I don’t care what they do to me, I can’t bear to be the cause of your, your descent.”

Nick half-smiled at the reference. “I am so far down the slippery slope, Gil, I’m surprised you can even see me.”

“No, you’re not. Not yet, Nick. Please, don’t…”

Nick stopped the words with a kiss. It was soft and tender, just the simple press of lips to lips, and over in short order. Staring into his lover’s eyes, Nick whispered, “Trust me, Gil. Just trust me, okay?”

Gil searched his eyes and, after a long moment, relaxed with a sigh. “I always have, Nicky.”

Nuzzling his lover’s throat, nearly insane with need from the close proximity after so long apart, Nick murmured, “Need you Gil, need you so bad. Please? Please let me have you?”

Gil groaned and bared his throat, even as he gasped, “They’re watching.”

“Don’t fucking care anymore,” Nick growled, sucking on Gil’s throat.

And he didn’t care. One thing this had taught him was to take what he could with his lover, when he could. His sucked hard on Gil’s throat, marking him and thrilling to the helpless noise of lust it provoked. He pushed Gil down on the bed and seized his mouth, tasting his lover for the first time in over a month and desperate for more.

Already hard, he could feel Gil’s body respond nearly as fast, and rubbed himself sinuously over his lover. Gil moaned into the kiss, his fingers gripping Nick’s shoulders with bruising force, even the splinted one, as his legs wrapped around Nick’s hips. Breaking off, he tore open Gil’s shirt and licked and bit at the expanse of warm skin there.

Arching into him when Nick sucked on one of his nipples, Gil hissed, “More!” and raked his fingernails up Nick’s back, leaving a trail of fire despite the shirt in between and ordered, “Take me, damn it!”

“Fuck!” Nick exclaimed, then bit the nipple hard enough to leave indents of his teeth.

Gil groaned his approval and shuddered in response. Nick moved to the other nipple and did the same, almost breaking the skin this time. Gil shouted and his legs tightened around Nick, rubbing their cocks together even more. Nick pushed up, breaking his lover’s hold, and ran his hands up and down Gil’s chest in a heavy caress, pinching the nipples, then twisting them simultaneously.

“Christ, Nicky, please!”

Grinning fiercely, Nick yanked down the sweatpants to reveal the hard, leaking cock just waiting for him. He gripped it, stroking it slow and hard, twisting his hand around it while playing with the heavy balls below. “If you come before I do, you’re gonna regret it, lover.”

Gil’s eyes rolled back at his low warning and a burst of pre-come spurt from his shaft. His legs splayed wantonly as far as they could, offering himself on a silver platter. Nick bent down and licked delicately at the smears of fluid on the hot flesh in his hand. Gil gave a full-body shudder and cried out when Nick took most of him into his mouth, sucking hard.

Nick settled in for a long, getting reacquainted period with one of his favorite parts of Gil’s body, thoroughly enjoying the needy moans coming from above and the way Gil writhed beneath him.

* * * *

Becker watched, mostly repulsed by the actual fact of two men having sex, but fascinated by the depth of emotions displayed. It was raw and carnal, the most passionate of couplings that he’d ever witnessed and certainly something to which he’d never been party. When the door opened, he didn’t pay attention, so engrossed was he in the unfolding scene on the monitor.

“Get him out of there.”

His boss’ harsh order took Becker completely by surprise and he looked at the older man dumbly a moment. “What?”

“You heard me. Get Nick out of that room right now.”

Becker knew that getting Nick away from Grissom would take an army at this point. They hadn’t actually started intercourse yet, but that wouldn’t matter to the young man in question. “Ah, Sir, I don’t think that now is a good time to…”

“Do it now, or you’ll find yourself off the project.”

Snapping to, Becker nodded and agreed, “Yes, Sir!” even as he cringed at what was going to be a very, very ugly scene to come.

* * * *

Nick heard the door open when he was face-first in Gil’s ass, tasting and sucking on his hole with eagerness. Fury lanced through him and Nick jumped off the bed, putting himself between Gil and the intruders. There were six large soldiers, all armed with tazers and batons, and Nick knew, logically, that he didn’t stand a chance, even with his enhanced body, but he didn’t care. Rage coursed through him, looking for an outlet.

Still panting from their interrupted sex and barely focused, Gil threw himself on Nick and hauled him back before he could charge them. Nick staggered and fell sideways, stopping himself from falling on Gil and accidentally hurting him. Gil’s hands clamped down around his face and he said urgently, “Don’t fight them, Nicky, please! Don’t hurt yourself over this!”

On the edge of sanity, Nick took a few minutes to bring himself back, drawing in deep, shuddering breaths. He finally nodded and Gil swooped in for a last, desperate kiss before Nick was pulled away by several pairs of hands.

Nick threw them all off and shouted, “All right! All right! I’m going, don’t fucking touch me!”

The soldiers withdrew, wary, but kept one hand on their tazers as they left the room. Nick caught a final glimpse of Gil with his head in his hands, on the bed. His heart ached at the vulnerable sight and he wanted only to hold the older man and tell him that it was going to be all right, even though they knew that wasn’t true.

Not yet, anyhow.

* * * *

Shaken, Gil didn’t move from the bed after Nick was taken away. He crawled under the blankets and curled up underneath them, struggling to deal with what had almost happened. His body was on overload and miserable from not being able to reconnect with Nick and finish to their natural conclusion.

“Mr. Grissom? Are you all right?”

Gil flinched at Jessie’s soft question but didn’t face her as he answered harshly, “What do you think?”

“I’m truly sorry, Mr. Grissom, but we had no choice. Our superior ordered that Nick be removed from the room. We were going to let the two of you, ah, keep going with what you were doing, but he overrode us.”

Remembering the look in Nick’s eyes when he’d asked for Gil’s trust, Gil took a deep breath and released it slowly. Nick needed more time for whatever he was planning, and Gil would do his best to make sure that he got it. Forcing himself to sit up, he faced the young woman and asked, “When do I get to meet this superior of yours?”

Jessie shook her head, replying, “Probably never.”

Stiffly, Gil stated, “The next time something like that happens, you can finish working on your little side project all by yourself. You can’t make me do anything, since Nick’s far too valuable to threaten me with.”

“I understand how upset you are, but…”

“You understand nothing, young woman,” Gil informed her, almost gently. “You don’t understand what it’s like to be so finely tuned to someone that you can almost hear his thoughts. You don’t understand what it’s like to know someone so well and still want to know more. To want to know everything about that person. In short, Ms. Wells, you don’t know what it’s like to be in love and for that, I pity you. I doubt that you even have the emotional capacity for such emotion.”

“Is it worth it? Is it worth all the pain and suffering that you’ve gone through to feel that?” she questioned earnestly.

Lifting his head, Gil nodded once and answered simply, “Yes.”

* * * *

A split second after the door opened and Becker entered the room, the man said hastily, “Before you do something stupid, let me explain.”

Nick gritted his teeth and stayed where he was, not just because of the guards between him and Becker, but also because of the irritated cast to the other man’s face. It was the most honest emotion he’d seen from the bastard since day one. “I’m waiting.”

“I wasn’t going to interrupt your little knockin’ boots session, it was my superior who did it,” Becker explained. “He’s the one who put the kibosh on the whole thing, not me.”

“Why!?” Nick demanded.

“Because no son of mine gets involved with a man, let alone a man like Grissom.”

Nick felt punched in the gut at his father’s voice and then, seeing him enter the room, he actually staggered back to fall onto the nearest chair. Shock was the easiest emotion to identify, with betrayal fast on its heels.

Michael Stokes shook his head in disgust as he looked at Nick and asked, “What were you thinking, Nick? All my hard work almost down the drain because you wanted to run off with that man. All the years of research and painstaking work that I went through to make you the best of the best.”

Hand to his stomach, feeling sure that he would vomit, Nick finally managed to draw in a complete breath.

“Well? What do you have to say for yourself?” Michael demanded.

Astounded, Nick exclaimed, “Me!? What the fuck do you have to say for yourself!? This is my life you ruined! My lover you had beaten and still hold hostage! My career you took away!”

Michael waved a negligent hand and said, “Your career was always unimportant and you still have your life. You have more than your life, Nick, you have all these extra gifts and I won’t let you squander them. I suppose it’s just as well that you formed an attachment to Grissom, since it makes you a little easier to control. You always were too stubborn for your own good. You get that from your mother.”

It was unreal. The entire conversation was insane. Any minute now, Nick fully expected to wake up, drugged to the gills in some kind of nuthouse.

“In any case, I thought the time had come for you to know what’s going on so that you’ll buckle down and get with the program. I know that you’re still holding back, Nick, because I know you,” his father stated.

Nick shook his head, eyes widening in fear that Gil would be beaten again, and exclaimed, “I’m not! I swear! I’m doing everything I possibly can do, to the best of my abilities!”

After a long, tense moment, Michael finally nodded. “Good. All right then. Get some rest and we’ll start fresh in the morning.”

Dumbfounded, Nick just nodded agreement and watched as his room emptied out. It was a good thing he was sitting, because he was positive he’d be on the floor, otherwise.

* * * *

“Sir, there’s something I don’t understand,” Becker asked as they walked down the hall.

Michael glanced at him. “What?”

“Why did you let them, well, bond for lack of a better word last month if you were never going to let them ah, physically reconnect?”

Snorting, Michael said, “I could care less who my son fucks. I pulled him out of there to keep him off balance. Meeting me pushed him a little further. In a few days, I want you to let him see Grissom again, only this time, you can let them do whatever they want. I suppose it will be good to know how the serum affected his sex drive. He seemed perfectly heterosexual before being injected, but maybe Crane missed something. Make it seem like you’re doing them a favor. I think having it come from Jessie would be more realistic. You and my son haven’t exactly gotten along over the last couple of months.”

Becker nodded and agreed, “Of course sir.”

They parted ways a short distance later and on the final leg to his office, Becker could only be grateful that he wasn’t related to Michael Stokes, feeling a little sorry for Nick, that he was.

* * * *

Nick was exhausted the next morning, not having slept more than a short period at a time. His nightmares surfaced fast, a mix of Gil being tortured and his father looming over him, disappointed and angry, as he’d done since childhood. When he reached the lab where the physical testing was done, Nick informed Becker, “I feel like shit, so don’t expect a lot today.”

Giving him a sweeping look, Becker concurred, “You look like shit. Why don’t we change schedule to mental exercises for today. We wouldn’t want your father to think that you were skimping, now, would we?”

“No,” Nick agreed hastily. “But, uh, I’m pretty wrung out all around. I mean, yeah, of course I’ll do my best but still, don’t expect a lot.”

Becker eyed him for a long moment, then nodded. “All right. I think you’ve earned a break anyhow. Yesterday would be enough to put anyone off their stride.”

Though he wanted to question the good grace, Nick didn’t dare. Things were so off kilter and in the air that he barely knew up from down. The only thing he did know was that he’d do anything to keep Gil from being beaten like before. “Thanks.”

He was brought to another room, a largish one with comfortable furniture, a television, computer, bookcases, and stereo. Nick glanced askance at Becker, who shrugged and said, “Even evil, soulless scientists need downtime. Hang out and rest until lunch. Someone will bring you food, then this afternoon you can go through some mental exercises with Dr. Wells.”

Nick nodded, but didn’t move when the other man left. He looked around the room, but nothing appealed to him. Sighing, he moved to the sofa and picked up a magazine from the coffee table. Flipping through, Nick’s mind was anywhere but on the articles he was looking at. His thoughts rested solely on two subjects: Gil, and his father.

* * * *

“Wake up, Nick.”

Jolted instantly from sleep by his father’s voice, Nick stared up at the older man silently for a long moment, taking in the changes. He wasn’t home very often, and his parents sure hadn’t visited him in Las Vegas, not even once. He and his mother talked often, but he’d never been close to his father, despite trying to win his approval. Sitting at last, he asked, “What do you want?”

“A better attitude, to start,” Michael replied sharply.

Nick sighed, rubbing his eyes. “Look, I’m exhausted, on edge, worried about Gil, and just found out my entire life was a sham. Could you cut me some slack?”

Snorting, Michael ordered, “Stop being melodramatic.”

“Melodramatic?” Nick exclaimed.

“Grissom is fine and your life hasn’t been a sham.”

“Yeah? How can I believe that? How can I believe anything you say when you’re holding us against our will, and, and experimenting on me!?” Nick shouted, jumping to his feet. “You’re supposed to be my father, for Christ’s sake! You’re supposed to do what’s best for me, not steal my life and hurt the man I love! Oh that’s right, you don’t want a queer for a son.”

Taking a breath, clearly keeping hold of his temper by a thin thread, Michael replied, “Were you always this way, or did Grissom somehow bring it out of you?”

“No, Dad, this isn’t something you can lay at Gil’s feet. I’ve been fucking guys since high school,” Nick sneered.

Michael shook his head and answered, “At least you were discreet about it. We had enough to worry about with you, without adding that to the list.”

Indignant, Nick demanded, “Like what!? No, never mind. You know what? I don’t even care. I don’t know who you are, and I sure as hell don’t want to know anyone who can be as ruthless and cold blooded as you. As far as I’m concerned, I don’t have a father anymore.”

For a long moment, they stared at each other, then Michael said, “You start back up tomorrow. Enjoy the rest of your day off. It’ll be your last for a long time.”

Nick watched him go and didn’t even try to stop him. He knew that look on his father’s face and it meant he wouldn’t budge. He didn’t want to listen to what Nick had to say or what Nick wanted. The only thing that mattered was what he wanted or didn’t want, and in this case, that meant keeping Nick and Gil where they were, separated, with no hope of seeing each other ever again.

Sighing heavily, Nick sank back onto the sofa.

* * * *

Nick groaned at the feel of Gil’s hands on his body, arching into the touch that he would know anywhere in the world amidst hundreds of other hands and thousands of other fingers. Warm, soft lips kissed his throat and moved up to nibble on his ear before he heard, “Wake up, Nicky, it’s not a dream.”

Awake and aware the moment that Gil’s body covered him, Nick wrapped his arms around his lover and flipped them over so that he lay on top. Laughing breathlessly, Gil exclaimed softly, “Not so much noise, Nicky, and we’re on a time limit here.”

“How did you get here?” Nick demanded quietly, then decided he could care less as he took his lover’s mouth in a deep, wet kiss that went on forever.

Gil arched up against him and broke off the kiss to whisper, “I want you in me, now.”

“God yeah,” Nick agreed, grinding into his lover.

There was a frantic flurry of clothes being yanked off and a minute later, Gil was on his stomach, draped over the pillow despite his protest that it was Nick’s only pillow. Nick just chuckled in the dark and said, “I’ll be able to smell you for a long time after, baby, it’s all good.”

Even in the dark, Gil’s embarrassment at that comment was easy to see. Distracting him was simple, though, as Nick started up where they’d been so rudely interrupted; diving into his lover’s ass. The faint sour smell and bitter taste was heaven to Nick, the essence of Gil at his earthiest. In moments, Gil pushed back against him, groaning softly, and Nick devoured his soft skin for a long time, thrusting his tongue inside and wetting it as much as possible, in place of lube.

Finally, Nick lined up and forced his cock inside the tight hole, causing them both to moan, though Gil’s was more of pain, than pleasure. He paused to give his lover time to adjust, moving deeper into Gil’s body at an excruciatingly slow pace. His cock throbbed, desperate to gather the sweet friction that would push him over the edge, but Nick kept himself firmly in check.

Gil’s legs spread even further to give him more room and, after several minutes, Nick was fully seated in him. Covering Gil completely, Nick rolled them on to their sides and wrapped his arms around his lover. Nuzzling the back of his throat, Nick whispered, “I love you, Gil.”

Lacing his good hand with Nick’s, Gil squeezed and replied, “Love you too, Nicky.”

They just lay like that for a few minutes in a comfortable silence. Nick couldn’t even describe how it felt to be so connected to Gil, surrounding and being surrounded. His hips began a gentle roll as he murmured, “I’ve gotta have you, baby, need you so bad.”

Starting to breathe hard, Gil nodded, gasping, “I’m yours, Nicky, all yours.”

Nick took that as permission to go a little harder and did so, pulling almost all the way out before thrusting back in with a heavy slap of balls to ass. He kept the pace slow and even, his body settling into a groove designed to keep Gil buried in sensation. “I’ve gone all night like this before, remember? You couldn’t figure out if it was punishment or reward. I’m gonna do it for as long as I can, baby, gonna use you so good and hard, you’ll remember the feel of me inside you for a week.”

Gil shuddered around him, jerking back, trying to hurry the pace, but Nick wouldn’t let him. With a wicked chuckle, he bit Gil’s ear sharply and said, “Nuh uh, Gris, you’re not in control here anymore. You’re mine, baby, and I’m gonna make it so you don’t know your own name.”

“Oh fuck, Nicky, please…”

“Please what, Gris? Please go harder? Faster? Slow it down? You gotta be more specific, baby.”

Gil clenched around him, using the only weapon he had left to him, and begged, “Make me come, Nicky, please make me come!”

“That, I can do,” Nick promised, gripping the leaking cock and stroking it tight.

It didn’t take long, maybe six or seven strokes before Gil cried out, face buried into the mattress, and spilled all over Nick’s hand, panting and shuddering. Nick’s eyes rolled back a little in response to the ecstasy he’d provided to his lover, feeling his own body tense unexpectedly in a small orgasm, spilling seed in Gil.

Still hard, though, Nick kept up the smooth motion in and out of Gil’s pliant body, his lover limp in his arms. “God, you feel so good, Gil, don’t ever want to let you go.”

At that, Gil craned his head around, his mouth open for a kiss. Nick stretched up and took the offering, slowly devouring him, their tongues sliding together, back and forth between mouths. Nick broke it off to let Gil breathe, then recaptured it, wanting it all. To that end, his hand lightly played with Gil’s cock and balls, rolling and rubbing them, getting another rise from his lover easily, which told him just how starved for affection Gil was.

Little kisses interspersed the deep, sucking ones, and they were both panting in short order, light-headed from the lack of time spent on breathing. Nick’s thrusts grew in force and sped up as his body demanded its due, not nearly as patient as when he’d been able to have Gil any time he’d wanted.

“Gil, oh man, Gil, I need, I need…”

“Do it Nicky, fuck me, let it all go,” Gil ordered.

Groaning in need, Nick rolled him flat and started fucking him in earnest, driving into Gil’s ass harder and harder. Gil cried out in pleasure, writhing beneath him and trying to push back to meet the thrusts, but pinned too firmly to do so.

Humping almost violently into his lover, Nick lost himself in the sensations, the feel of his cock in Gil, who clenched and unclenched his internal muscles to increase the tightness and friction. The sweat and come that made the slide that much easier. The heavy smell of musk and sex in the air. The desperate noises Gil made as he neared his own orgasm, completely in sync with Nick.

His body tightened the same time as Gil’s and they came simultaneously; Gil buried face first in the mattress, humping against the pillow and Nick grinding his cock as deep as it could go inside Gil. The release was almost excruciating as he spilled in his lover to overflowing and collapsed on top of Gil, unable to move. Nick could feel the thudding of Gil’s heart and it was in time to his own, which only increased the goofy smile he knew was on his face.

“Did we just have an earthquake?” Gil teased, his voice a little shaky.

Chuckling, Nick gently pulled out, ignoring Gil’s sleepy protest and the fact that he was still hard because he hadn’t come a second time. Or, in this case, a third. “I want to make sure I didn’t hurt you, don’t move.”

“Lights?”

“Don’t need them anymore, not really,” Nick informed him, shifting down until he was level with Gil’s ass. He gently pulled the cheeks apart, wincing at the level of redness and Gil’s hiss of pain. Guilty, he apologized, “Sorry, baby, I shouldn’t have been so rough without any lube around.”

Gil looked back at him and shook his head. “I wanted you like that just as bad, remember?”

Snorting, Nick sucked on his finger for a moment to wet it then slowly pushed it inside and carefully felt around. There was a very small tear, nothing serious and he sighed in relief. “Watch your diet over the next couple of days and have a doctor check you over, just in case.”

Gil turned over, flinching a little as he did so, and reached out to pull Nick close. “I’ll be fine, Nick.”

Nick allowed himself to be pulled down, flipping the pillow so it was dry-side up, and curled up on Gil’s chest. Combing his fingers lightly through the gray hair, Nick sighed in deep contentment and murmured, “Don’t want to leave you.”

“I know,” Gil sighed, kissing the top of his head. “But we probably don’t have a lot of time left. Jessie had to pull some strings to get me in to see you. I think that…jerk…who runs the project is out of the building tonight or something.”

Chuckling a little, Nick commented, “I’ve called him worse than that, believe me.”

“Oh, I do,” Gil assured him, a smile in his voice.

They were silent for a while, then reluctantly, Nick said, “All this is my fault.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Apparently, my father’s the one who put this whole thing together. I’ve been part of some program since before I was born. Everything I am, is genetically engineered. The serum, that stuff they gave me that killed, but didn’t kill me, was just the last part of the program,” Nick admitted, terrified of his lover’s reaction.

For a long moment, Gil didn’t say anything, clearly thinking over what to say. He at last lifted Nick’s chin with a finger and said fiercely, “Everything you are, can’t be created in a lab, Nick. You are unique and wonderful, kind and generous to a fault. You’re honorable and sweet and stronger in your heart and morals and mind than any man has a right to be. All of that is what made me fall in love with you.”

Nick slowly relaxed at the blazingly sincere words and smiled. “You don’t know how scared I was to tell you, Gil. I thought you’d hate me for sure.”

“How could I? It would be like hating my heart,” Gil said simply, kissing him. “None of this is your fault. You’re a victim here, just like me.”

Nick curled up around him again and whispered, “I don’t know what to do here, Gil. How could he? My whole life was a lie until I left home. I don’t even know that man.”

Soothing fingers carded through Nick’s hair and Gil replied, “I’m so sorry, Nicky, no one should face that kind of betrayal, but especially not you. You deserve only good people in your life, my love.”

Nick warmed at hearing that, even as he tried not to think about the enormity of his father’s betrayal. Secure in Gil’s arms and love, Nick’s eyes closed against his will and he drifted into sleep.

* * * *

Nick Stokes and Gil Grissom are being held against their will at a facility 107 miles northwest of Las Vegas. If you wish to keep them alive, they need to be removed within 36 hours. I can not guarantee their safety beyond that. Contact and coordinate with Ryan Welsh at the FBI office. He can be trusted.

Jim stared at the email with a distinct sense of dissociation. He’d been searching for Nick and Gil for the entire time they’d been gone. The first month had been nonstop. It had only been the threat of losing his job that had reined him in, knowing that he couldn’t use the resources of the LVPD if he wasn’t on it.

For a long time, he just stared at the email, unable to grasp that the end was within sight. That Nick and Gil were both close enough to get to within a couple of hours. Shaking himself out of the spell of shock, Jim picked up his cell and dialed the FBI office.

“FBI Las Vegas, how may I direct your call?”

“Yeah hi. I need to speak to Agent Ryan Welsh.”

“One moment please. May I ask who’s calling?”

“Detective Jim Brass, Las Vegas Homicide.”

Jim’s mind was racing as he waited for the agent to pick up. Were they all right? Where had they been all this time, at that facility? What was the facility? Who was keeping them against their will? Too many questions and no answers at all. Hopefully, this Welsh would be able to shed some light.

“Special Agent Ryan Welsh. How can I help you, Detective Brass?”

Jim took a breath and answered, “This is going to be a long story. You know somewhere secure that we can meet?”

* * * *

Gil wasn’t sure how he knew for sure, but he could feel his death coming in the air. There was something different about how he was treated by the people around him. They weren’t any less polite and didn’t take any more notice of him than usual, but there was something different. He was reminded of the attitude professional scientists got just before they had to terminate a subject animal. Like they were reminding themselves that the subject wasn’t real and didn’t operate on the same level as those in control of the experiment.

It wouldn’t even be so bad, except for the burning need to see Nick one more time before he was killed. Just to hold him and be held in those incredibly strong arms would be enough. To look into his eyes and see the love shining back at him. He could face anything, as long as he had that.

“So when’s it going to happen?” he asked one morning.

Startled, Jessie looked over at him. “Excuse me?”

“My death,” he clarified. “When am I to be killed?”

Her gaze shifted away even as she denied, “That’s not going to happen, Mr. Grissom.”

“Sure it is. I’d guess within the next twenty-four to forty-eight hours from how everyone is acting.”

“Really, Mr. Grissom, it’s not…”

“Just do me a favor,” he interrupted.

Jessie sighed and briefly met his eyes. “What’s that?”

“Don’t tell Nick that I’m dead. Tell him you had me transferred to some other facility because you couldn’t secure us both here any longer,” Gil requested.

Frowning, Jessie questioned, “Why would you ask that?”

A bit wistful, Gil answered, “Because I can’t stand the thought of him suffering alone. At least if he thinks I’m alive and somewhere else, he’ll have hope.”

“That’s precisely what we’re trying to break him of, Mr. Grissom.”

Gil turned towards the newcomer, recognizing Michael Stokes’ voice right away. They’d only met once before, just after Nick had become a CSI 3, and even now Nick didn’t know about that. It hadn’t gone well, both men having an invested interest in Nick that was at odds. Keeping relaxed and casual was a chore, but he managed it. “If you tell him that I’m dead, he’ll never work freely for you a moment in his life. You’ll have a fight on your hands to even get near him.”

“I know my son, Grissom, and without you to bolster him, Nick will crumble and become as biddable as he was when a child,” Michael stated.

Lips twisting, Gil countered firmly, “You don’t know Nick anymore, not the way I do. I’ve watched him become a man over the last several years. He’s stronger that you think, much stronger, and if you tell him that I’m dead, he’s going to want to tear this place apart with his bare hands. He’s always had a very strong sense of justice, and been protective of those he loves, but whatever was in that serum sent those instincts into overdrive. Trust me. If you kill me and he finds out about it, you’re all of you dead.”

Michael stared at him thoughtfully and finally agreed, “I’ll take that under advisement. As for when, your termination has been scheduled for tomorrow. If it’s any comfort, you won’t be in any pain. It’ll be like you overdosed on sleeping pills.”

“Oh that’s a great comfort,” Gil replied caustically.

A faint smile surfaced on Michael’s face as he said, “Losing a mind like yours is a shame, but it can’t be helped.”

When the other man left, Gil glanced over at Jessie to find an odd expression on her face. It was gone very quickly, but not fast enough to make him doubt what he’d seen: anger. Thoughtful, he didn’t comment on it, but did wonder what could have put it there when the woman had been so adamant about not becoming emotionally involved with him.

Then again, it was difficult not to get involved with a subject who could talk back.

* * * *

Pacing his small room, Nick glared at the door as if to move it by sheer force of will. Something was going on and it involved Gil. He could tell by the way no one would meet his eyes. They refused to even speak about him in Nick’s presence and that was enough to make him more than a little antsy.

The worst of it was that he could get out on his own. He knew the door lock codes, he knew the layout and the security schedule. What he didn’t know was where Gil was being held and the chances of them finding him, before he found Gil, were really high. All running off now would do was alert them to the fact that he knew the codes and cause them to change the locks.

The door opened, startling him, and the woman who’d been ‘taking care of’ Gil peeked inside. She looked just as startled to find him staring at the door as he was to see her, but exclaimed in a whisper, “Come with me, quick! I have to get the two of you out of here before they kill him!”

Nick was out the door a split second after those words left her mouth.

“Just walk beside me like I’m taking you for some testing,” she murmured. “I’ve got him stashed somewhere they won’t come across him any time soon. Hopefully long enough to let the Calvary get here.”

The walk was the longest that he’d ever taken, not knowing if they’d be stopped at any moment, or if Gil was still where she’d left him. It was a horrendous five minutes later that she stopped at a door and typed in a code that was different than the others he knew. Motioning him inside, she followed and closed the door behind them.

Nick was grabbed in a bear-hug that he automatically returned, breathing in Gil’s scent and feeling as if it were again imprinted on his brain.

“I’m going to head back before I’m missed.”

Gil reluctantly broke away from Nick and held his hand out to the woman with, “Thank you, Jessie. You’re a good person for taking a chance like this.”

Half-smiling, she shook her head and replied, “If I was a good person, I wouldn’t have let it go on so long. But your friend should be here with reinforcements soon and he’s got the map to get to this room. If that light blinks orange, the door will open, but it won’t be anyone you want to see. If it’s green, it’ll be friendly.”

“Thank you,” Nick said sincerely, taking her hand when Gil released it. “Thank you so much.”

She flushed a little and hurried to the door, leaving them alone.

Nick pulled Gil into his arms and held on tight, kissing his ear and the side of his throat. “Oh Gil, God, I can’t believe it. We’re getting out of here, baby.”

Nodding, Gil returned the hug and relaxed into his arms, saying, “Jim’s on his way. She contacted him a couple of days ago.”

With a grin, Nick pulled back enough to exclaim, “It’s gonna be great, seeing everyone again! I can’t believe this is almost over!”

“Don’t count your chickens yet, Nick. We’re not free yet,” Gil cautioned.

Nick leaned in for a long, slow kiss, which Gil melted into, then wrapped his arms around Gil again and whispered, “No matter what, I’m not going to let them kill you. I don’t care what it takes.”

Gil shivered in his arms and his fingers tightened convulsively on Nick’s shirt. A clicking noise alerted Nick that the door was about to open and he turned to see the light flicker orange. “Fuck!”

There was nowhere for them to go, though, the room had no closets or places to hide. It was just an empty room. Nick stood in front of Gil protectively, determined not to let anything happen to his lover. They really were going to have to kill him first.

The door opened on his father, who looked furious and exclaimed, “What the hell have you done, Grissom!? How did you contact the authorities!?”

Gil tried to step out from behind Nick, but Nick remained in front of him and said, “It doesn’t matter, Dad. Brass is on his way and you can take off now, or get caught. Choice is yours.”

Glaring at his son, Michael snarled, “You’ve always been an ungrateful little bastard, Nicholas! Every opportunity we gave you, you just pissed away! You were never as good as your brothers and sisters and I’m sorry I ever thought you could be!”

Nick flinched at the cutting words, even as he knew he shouldn’t take them to heart, the older man being what he was. “At least I know right from wrong. I must’ve gotten that from Mom, too.”

“What makes you think she wasn’t in on this from the beginning?” Michael sneered.

Nick sucked in a shocked breath at the thought.

“Enough!” Gil interrupted harshly. “Michael, you’re losing your window of opportunity to get out of here. I suggestion you not let it close altogether.”

“Just one last thing.”

Nick wasn’t even surprised by the gun that appeared in his father’s hand.

“Move, Nick.”

“Not a chance.”

“I’ll shoot you too,” Michael warned coldly.

Shrugging, Nick replied, “Go ahead. I have no life without him, so you might as well kill me too.”

“Nick, no, get out of the way!” Gil exclaimed, trying to break free and get passed him.

Nick turned and grabbed Gil, keeping his back to his father and pushing Gil against the wall so that no part of his lover showed. Staring Gil in the eyes, he whispered earnestly, “I have no life without you, baby. If he doesn’t kill me, I’ll do it myself.”

Shaken, Gil just stared back at him, unable to speak.

A single gunshot rang out and Nick flinched instinctively, but felt no pain. Frowning, he glanced over his shoulder to find his father dead on the floor, blood and brains splattered on the concrete. Jim stood at least twenty-five feet down the hall, holstering his gun as he walked towards them. Even knowing what his father had done and been didn’t help stop the nausea from forcing its way up and out of him.

Gil held him from the side, rubbing his hand soothingly over Nick’s back as he murmured nonsense into his ear. Nick just curled up on his lap and cried, staring at the bloody wreck of the body of the man who used to be his father.

Epilogue:

Stretching luxuriously, Nick yawned until his jaw cracked and rolled over into the warm spot Gil had left in the bed. He buried his face in the pillow and grinned foolishly at the way he could smell his lover still on it.

“Trying to suffocate yourself?”

Gil’s dry teasing brought Nick up on his elbows to stick his tongue out. “Just enjoying the morning. Of course, it would be better with you back in bed.”

Wagging a finger at Nick, Gil answered, “I am not going to be late for my first day of work. Just because you’re taking a sabbatical from earning a living doesn’t mean I am.”

Nick grinned and observed with an eyebrow wiggle, “You look so hot in that tweed, I’m telling you, the co-eds are just going to eat you up again. You’re going to need me there just for protection.”

Eyes rolling, Gil continued on to the closet and pulled out his suit jacket. “I’ll see you for lunch at noon, on the dot. If you’re going to be late…”

“I’ll call you,” Nick promised. They were both still skittish about letting each other out of sight, but it was better than it had been. For the first month, they hadn’t been separated by more than a room at a time, even in their own home. More often than not, they’d been joined at the hip, in public and private.

Gil walked over to the bed for a long, lingering kiss before heading for the door, saying, “Try not to laze in bed all morning, Nicky.”

Rolling onto his back, Nick answered flippantly, “Maybe.”

With an indulgent smile, Gil left the room.

Nick sighed and stared up at the ceiling for a long time, struggling not to give in to the depression that still dogged him in Gil’s absence. After Jim’s timely rescue, they’d been hustled from the facility back to Las Vegas and into protective custody at the FBI. They hadn’t been permitted to leave the office, but Catherine, Sara, Greg, and Warrick had all come to see them. It had been a short, hurried reunion as Welsh had wanted to get Nick and Gil away and into the witness protection program as fast as he could.

Even with Welsh’s insistence that he would personally erase all traces of them from the system, Gil had double checked to make sure it was done properly. On top of that, they’d up and left the ‘safe’ new life provided them, and moved off on their own. Just in case.

That had been three months ago. They kept in touch with Catherine, Warrick, Sara, Greg, and Jim via email, though of course through precaution after precaution, and never told them where they were. They’d finally settled in a small town on the New York/Canadian border where Gil could teach at a community college. Nick hadn’t settled on what he wanted to do yet, feeling restless and discontented, despite his happiness with Gil.

It felt like he should be out there, making a difference, but that was impossible now. At least in the way that he wanted to, by putting the bad guys behind bars.

The doorbell rang and Nick instantly tensed. He rolled over to his side of the bed and pulled the gun out from under the mattress, then rolled off altogether. He padded silently to the window above the front door and peered down to find Agent Welsh on his front doorstep. Irritated, Nick set the gun inside the nearest table drawer and jogged downstairs, two at a time.

Opening the door, he greeted, “How the hell did you find us?”

Welsh grinned, his young, but weather-beaten face lighting up mischievously. “You did really good, except for that last email to Sanders. Maybe there was a hiccup in the system you were using or something, but we got lucky and managed to trace it back to your IP Address. Can I come in?”

Sighing, Nick motioned him inside and walked into the living room. “Not to be rude or anything, but what do you want?”

“You,” Welsh stated bluntly. When Nick stiffened, he continued hastily, “In a good way. I’ve been trying for years to put together a specialized, investigative team that would look into possible abuses of power like the one that snared you and your partner. I finally got the approval after this last debacle was brought to light. I’ve been looking for you and Mr. Grissom to give you both the opportunity to work with us. You’d be perfect for the job.”

Eyeing him suspiciously, Nick questioned, “Wouldn’t that blow the whole ‘safety in relocation’ thing?”

“Well, yes and no. I’ve gotten permission to start up a live-in facility that would house the operatives between missions,” Welsh explained. “You’d go through an intensive training program a lot like what FBI Agents go through, but more a mix of all the different agencies with a little special forces thrown in, considering your…unique abilities. It’s geared towards each operative’s strengths and weaknesses, so naturally, Mr. Grissom would have a different kind of training than you would.”

“You know you’re nuts, right?” Nick said skeptically. “After everything we just went through, what in hell makes you think we’d want to be anywhere near something like that?”

Earnest now, Welsh replied, “Because of what you just went through! I know you don’t want to see anything like that happen to other people, and you’d be putting people away who are playing God with innocent people’s lives. I’m not saying it’s the safest job in the world, but you’d be making a difference again.”

Which is exactly what you were just bitching about, he thought sourly. Ask and ye shall receive.

“Look, Welsh, it’s not that I don’t appreciate the thought, but…”

“Just talk to Mr. Grissom about it. Here’s my card. Call me day or night when you make your decision,” Welsh said. “I’ll be waiting to know, either way. Oh, and I erased all the information as to where you are, so you don’t need to worry about relocating again if you decide not to join us.”

Nick sighed and shook the other man’s hand when it was held out expectantly. “All right. I’ll talk to Grissom.”

“Great! I look forward to hearing from you!” Welsh exclaimed, grinning ear-to-ear as if the decision to do it was already in the bag.

After walking him to the door and closing it behind him, Nick stared down at the card for a long time, fingers poised to tear it up. Lips pursed thoughtfully, he left it on the coffee table to go and take a shower. Maybe he could convince Gil to take a break between classes and talk to him about it then. Not that he was going to suggest they do it. No chance.

No. He was just going to get Gil’s opinion on the whole thing before tearing that card up and throwing it out.