Title: Four Reasons for Hestitation and One for Certainty
By: mickeylover303
Pairing: Ryan/Greg
Rating: PG
Words: 3523
Summary: Yeah, Ryan was apprehensive, but that was only because Greg seemed so anxious.

It was already Sunday.
 
But Ryan still couldn’t get over Saturday.
 
Because it really started on Friday.
 
The way that tongue was swirling around his nipple…agonisingly slow and painfully – God, Greg could be a tease – going down his chest, tracing the fine hairs on his stomach and travelling down to-
 
And that’s how Ryan ended up where he was…trapped in a memory and five minutes from his apparently inevitable doom. Excuses, he was full of, but Greg didn’t seem to be relenting or falling for anything. Not like he would usually fall for Ryan’s rationale, he always saw through them, but still…using sex as a form of coercion was just…not cool.
 
However, bribery of a sexual nature didn’t make up for what happened yesterday. Greg had known Eric for less than twenty-four hours, but Ryan ended up knowing more than he desired about his co-worker because Greg had, evidently, found a new friend in Eric. Okay…Eric actually turned out to be kind of…not what Ryan initially perceived him to be.
 
Not that he would even admit to Greg that he even thought he may have been wrong about his colleague.
 
“He still didn’t have to do that.”
 
“Do what?” If he had known Ryan was going to be so touchy, Greg would have just gone alone…if it didn’t defeat the purpose of his visit. True, his main intent was to spend time with Ryan, but it was also on his agenda to pry and try to resolve some of the rigidity with Ryan concerning his co-workers. And as much as he would rather Ryan transfer to Vegas – not too mention it would be much easier – Ryan’s home was in Miami.
 
Greg couldn’t ask Ryan to give up his family.
 
A family Ryan didn’t know he had…yet.
 
“You know,” Ryan urged, as if Greg knew exactly what he was talking about. Because he knew Greg did. And he also knew Greg liked to pretend to be timid, when he was anything but.
 
“If I’m asking you, obviously, I don’t know,” Greg retorted, well aware of the bulging vein on Ryan’s forehead. His head resting on the palm of his hand, elbow on the armrest as he continued to feign ignorance.
 
“I’m not playing…not this time.”
 
Greg sighed at Ryan’s immaturity…although, he couldn’t really say much because he was guilty of the same thing. “You could have come with us, you know?”
 
“Other than the fact I wanted to stay on the boat.” Besides, Ryan didn’t have time to get into a wetsuit. He was too busy watching Greg getting into a wetsuit.
 
“Eric’s been nice about this…” Greg paused, covering his yawn as he leaned over to rest his head on Ryan’s shoulder. “Whole thing.”
 
Ryan, not oblivious to Greg’s rare display of lethargy, laid his head on Greg’s, smirking into Greg’s hair.
 
“I can feel your smirk.”
 
“I didn’t say anything.” But Ryan was thinking about last night. Greg may have the energy, but it was Ryan who had the stamina.
 
Greg chose not to comment as Ryan nuzzled his face into his hair. It was a distraction, Greg knew, but it was only so because it worked. “I’m still not watching a movie marathon with you, again…or ever, really. I’m never doing that-”
 
“You couldn’t even wait to the watch the beginning of the second one?”
 
“Anyway.” Now somewhat more alert, Greg pushed off Ryan, finding temporary comfort in the passenger’s seat…even if it was less comfortable than Ryan’s shoulder. “Back to Eric.”
 
“Who I don’t want to talk about.”
 
“Well…” Greg put his finger on his chin, pretending to be involved in some sort of deep thought process. “He did bring up having a threesome.”
 
“That’s it.” Ryan turned the keys, revving up the engine. “We’re leaving.”
 
Greg put his hand over Ryan’s, motioning for Ryan to turn the ignition off. “I’m kidding, Ryan.” Greg’s smile began to fade when he noticed Ryan wasn’t participating in their usual teasing.
 
“That’s not funny.”
 
“We had this conversation already…yesterday and Friday. And I’m the one who took the brunt of it.”
 
“I just…I don’t want you to leave me, you know?”
 
“This from the same guy who literally hunted me down?”
 
“That was different…” So different that if Ryan did go through with this, he prayed Greg wouldn’t bring it up. “Here-”
 
“I like you, Ryan. Not Eric and definitely no one else.” Greg was actually surprised he would have to reassure Ryan of something so simple, something Greg didn’t even think twice about.   In a way, it hurt to know that Ryan still doubted himself, but it did make Greg feel more comfortable about their relationship: the fact that Ryan actually held their relationship in such high regard.   “Just you, Ryan.”
 
Ryan tried to hide his smile at the words, the turn of his lips resulting in a kind of grimace. It was the most serious they’ve really been since those first few weeks where they fumbled through a fantasy, living the moment until they crashed into the reality. And here they were, more than a year later.
 
Still…it wasn’t like they exchanged the proverbial vows or professed some kind of love to one another, but Ryan knew this was probably the closest they’d get to that.
 
For now, at least.
 
“And Eric did help put this together. Who knew everybody happened to have enough time off on a Sunday night?” Greg added, trying to lighten the mood, not really one for prolonged sentiment. He was embarrassed to admit to something of that calibre, not the emotion behind it, but in a car outside a family-oriented restaurant wasn’t exactly the best place to say something like that.
 
Plus, if Ryan stared at him any harder…
 
“I still think this is a bad idea.”
 
“And I think you’re blowing this whole thing out of proportion.” Greg was relieved when Ryan no longer gazed at him so intently. He’d never felt so naked before, not even when he was actually…naked. “I mean it’s something you usually do, so I kind of expected it.” And that’s why he tried to dress himself with a detached feeling, brush it off with familiar humour.
 
Because he was afraid.
 
“Thanks, Greg.” Ryan snorted. Yeah, there was truth behind the statement, but it didn’t mean he had to agree with it. But he didn’t say much more because he could feel that Greg was unnerved by his confession. Ryan could acknowledge that he was a little unnerved, too.
 
He didn’t think he and Greg were ready for something like that.
 
Not yet, anyway.
 
“Seriously though, how long have you been working here?”
 
“Two years,” Ryan replied lamely, not really understanding where Greg was going with the question.
 
“Do you even hang out with your team?”
 
Ryan had to admit that Alexx did occasionally invite him to dinner with her family. And Calleigh has tried to hang out with him. And maybe Eric suggested going out for drinks those three or ten times, but Ryan couldn’t tell if they were being sincere or luring him into some kind of false security. “Ever since I came here-”
 
“Ryan-”
 
“No, let me finish.” Ryan shook his head, hands gripping the steering wheel. “This was before I met you. They…they treated me differently.”
 
“After Speedle died?”
 
“Yeah,” Ryan replied softly, turning his head and smiling at two kids jumping up and down on the sidewalk. Holding hands, both couldn’t be more than seven or eight. He could practically hear the excitement and laughter through the upped windows of the car.
 
“I know you don’t have a Nick or a Warrick or even a Sara, not that you would want her, but that’s because you didn’t give them a chance.”
 
“Even if they never gave me one?”
 
“Trust me, I practically live with Warrick and Nick and I date you, so I know stubborn people.”
 
“And you’re still seeing me?” Ryan joked.
 
“Hey, I don’t question why I still like you. Because if I’ve only known you a year and you’ve already had two years with them…”
 
“Greg…”
 
“Then, I know they’ll like you, too.”
 
Ryan couldn’t think of anything to say, finding it better to confine himself to the resulting silence. He thought they’d closed that subject already. They rarely talked about that level of commitment because it was touchy, scary even. But if Greg was willing to bring it up again…well, that itself said a lot to Ryan.
 
“Here,” Greg said, interrupting Ryan’s thoughts and giving the other man a kiss on his ear, soon tuning into an impromptu nibbling session on Ryan’s earlobe. Since Greg wasn’t the type of person who would be satisfied with a simple kiss…or anything that was a sign of normality.
 
Ryan relaxed into the sensation, not caring that they were in a public parking lot…of a family-oriented restaurant. Then again, the things Greg could do with his tongue...it was the reason why Ryan was in said parking lot in the first place. “What was that for?”
 
“Ready to get out the car, now?”
 
**
 
The entire table was cloaked with silence.
 
Except for that birthday song with the clapping coming from the booth next to them that’s different in every restaurant but essentially the same: still annoying because Ryan knew he wasn’t getting the free cake since it wasn't his birthday and he would feel bad for lying about it a second time even though Greg lied about it the first time.
 
Which in no way was related to the artificial tension. Lack of free cake had nothing to do with it.
 
Although it probably would have kept Greg’s mouth shut.
 
Ryan turned his head at the small sniggering sound coming from his right…from Eric. “Don’t do-”
 
But it was too late and the beginning of Ryan’s pleas fell to deaf ears as everyone around the table – including Greg, of course – erupted into laughter.
 
“Wolfe, I never…” Eric trailed off, words lost among his fits of laughter. “Oh man…”
 
At least Horatio was professional enough to keep it down to a smirk. “I have to admit Mr. Wolfe,” However, that smirk may have been worse because his head was inclined in that forty-seven degree angle – Greg thought it was at least fifty-degrees, but Ryan still begged to differ – and Horatio appeared as though he was teasing Ryan. To get teased by Horatio of all people... “I never imagined you to be-”
 
“A stalker!” It must have been a southern thing because Calleigh cut Horatio off with the most boisterous voice that ensured everyone could hear her.
 
“Calleigh.” Greg smiled as he heard Ryan’s admonishing voice, holding Ryan’s hand under the table. He knew Ryan would probably be embarrassed for the rest of his life, but it was a funny way to meet someone.
 
Nick didn’t think it was funny, but Greg made sure to tell Nick after the older man met Ryan.
 
“He dropped his phone,” Ryan said, trying to keep the whine out of his voice as he spoke to defend himself.
 
“Ryan, baby.” Ryan groaned. The last person, who he needed an opinion from, was Alexx. “Why didn’t you call one of his friends or something...or drop it off at the police station?”
 
“I wasn’t thinking about it. I was going to give it to him then, but he already got into his car…so, I followed him?” Ryan added while bunching his shoulders together. He wasn’t really concerned with how it looked at the time, more fixated on doing the right thing. That and it was easy to get sidetracked by Greg and that outfit he wore that was fortunately – for Ryan – still somewhere in Greg’s closet.
 
“All the way to his apartment?” Eric asked; a combination of disbelief and hilarity displayed on his face, which was red from trying to refrain from another bout of hysterics; that’s how Ryan saw it anyway.
 
“You make it seem like I was a-”
 
“Stalker?” Calleigh was more than happy to supply, using the word that seemed to be the only one in her vocabulary. It must have been the fifth time in ten minutes. And at that average, it was a hell of a lack of verbiage.
 
“I was trying to do the right thing.” Ryan found himself protesting again, nudging for Greg to help defend him. He did get Ryan into this situation in the first place. “I just wanted to make sure he got it, all right?”
 
“Once you got past the creepiness-” Greg broke off as Ryan gave him another gentle shove. But he ignored the gesture, retorting with the most mischievous grin. “Yeah, but once you got past that, it was cute.”
 
Ryan knew he would explode in his embarrassment, probably be the first person to prove true that myth about human spontaneous combustion. He expected the annoying cooing noises from Alexx and Calleigh; they were practically a puddle of mush throughout the whole story…if you didn’t count Calleigh’s need to shout “stalker” every two minutes. Ryan wasn’t even bothered by Eric rolling his eyes and snickering in between Greg’s words. No, it was Horatio’s response that got him. He no longer needed to question it because his boss was teasing him…actually making fun of him and it wasn’t funny.
 
Well, maybe the forty-seven degree tilt of Horatio’s head kind of made his boss look endearing. Not the way he normally looked at a kid or something, but the way Horatio looked when he was genuinely happy for someone. It wasn’t an expression that Ryan hadn’t seen before, but it still made him wary concerning the circumstances.
 
Only because Ryan never thought he’d see Horatio directing it at him.
 
“So what happened next?” Eric asked, wanting to move past the lovey-dovey air Ryan was sure he and Greg were exuding.
 
“I followed Greg to his apartment-”
 
“And he snuck up behind me and-”
 
“Ryan?” Alexx interrupted Greg, turning her head to look at Ryan questioningly.
 
“I didn’t want to scare him.” Ryan ignored the incredulous looks he received, opting to uphold his reasoning…however much good it actually did. “Plus, he attacked me.” Ryan pointed at Greg accusingly.
 
“In self-defence, but-”
 
“I got the upper-hand, anyway. Man, you know I tried to explain it to him but he wouldn’t stop trying to kick me?  But of course, I had training on my side and I managed to pin him to the door before he started screaming and-”
 
A small cough disrupted Ryan’s tirade, successfully pulling him out of his thoughts. Greg was covering his face with his hands; turning away from Ryan and the others were…they looked uncomfortable for some reason.
 
Horatio looked like he may have been blushing, but Ryan wasn't able to see because the shadows lining the older man’s face. Alexx…with Alexx, Ryan couldn’t really tell because of her complexion, but judging by the position of her hand near her mouth, he could assume that she was the one who coughed. Calleigh was definitely red, flustered even. And Eric was looking at Ryan lasciviously, like Ryan said something that…
 
Oh.
 
Greg sighed into his hands for the seemingly tenth time since they sat at the table.
 
“And what did you say Mr. Sanders?” Horatio asked, trying to dispel some of the uneasy atmosphere due to the way most minds – after the age of twelve – worked.
 
To this, Greg had no choice but to be flustered. If they thought Ryan was bad for lurking outside Greg’s apartment, they’d probably find Greg’s reaction – after the initial tumble with Ryan and his door – kind of strange. “I asked him if he wanted to come in.”
 
“And for some reason I thought you would have been the sensible one,” Alexx snorted into her ice tea, the scent of lemon assaulting her nose and the ice in glass rocking with the brown tinted liquid.
 
By this time – and much to Ryan’s relief – Calleigh had calmed down, no longer trying to squeeze her new favourite word in between coughs. “So, it was definitely a match for you, two, huh? Because I would never ask someone who assaulted me in my house.”
 
“Yeah, Wolfe would have been on the ground.”
 
Ryan rolled his eyes at Eric’s comment, though not bothering to hide the smile from his face. “Or I would have been looking inside the barrel of one of her firearms.”
 
“What can I say?” Calleigh shrugged her shoulders. “I love my guns.”
 
“You’re lucky you had no charges pressed against you.” Alexx narrowed her eyes at Ryan, who was happy the older woman wasn’t sitting next to him. “What were you doing in a club when you were supposed to be attending a conference?”
 
“Uh…”
 
“Chill, Alexx.” Eric smirked, trying to take the attention off Ryan. “I think it was something about DNA…” He trailed off at when Horatio raised his eyebrows. “That I’m sure was very informative and just took a lot out of-”
 
“I don’t think you’re helping Eric,” Calleigh teased, lightly touching Eric’s forearm.
 
It was like dealing with her own kids and Alexx couldn’t contain soft laughter that escaped her. But her attention was soon brought to someone who hadn’t spoken in a while. “Greg, honey.” Alexx looked up from her half-eaten dessert, watching Greg try to cover his yawn, burrowing his face into Ryan’s shoulder. “Are you okay?”
 
“Greg?” Ryan looked at Greg. He didn’t notice the older man resting against his shoulder. The proximity was normal, even in a public setting, but Ryan was surprised that Greg was comfortable enough around his co-workers.
 
And looking back at how much he was enjoying himself, Ryan was also surprised to find he’d let his guard down, as well.
 
“I’m fine.” Greg opened his eyes to see the entire table watching him. He sat up quickly, trying to shrug off the looks of concern. It wasn’t what he’d planned, but at least Ryan had gotten something out of it. Greg only regretted that his fatigue was probably going to cut the dinner short. He’d make a note to get more sleep on the plane next time…put it on the fridge or someplace. “Sorry.”
 
Ryan started to dismiss Greg’s apology, but was interrupted by Horatio. “Actually,” he said, taking a quick glance at his watch. “It’s already eleven.”
 
Eric sighed in mock disdain, the glint in his eyes further increasing the lack of severity in action. “You just had to say it, H.”
 
“I think we’re just stalling so we don’t have to pay the bill,” Alexx surmised.
 
“Yeah, it has nothing to do with the fact that we have work tomorrow,” Calleigh added.
 
“I guess I’m covering for two.” Ryan smiled as he gestured to Greg, who was out again, mouth slightly hanging open as he found a comfortable spot on Ryan’s shoulder. “Greg did the smart thing so he wouldn’t have to pay.”
 
Horatio shook his head, already pulling out his wallet. “We’ll have to do this again sometime.”
 
**
 
“I’m sorry about tonight.”
 
“You still up?”
 
“Does semi-consciousness count?” Greg asked as he slowly moved to face Ryan, eyes still closed as he curled up to the cool body next to him.
 
“I don’t think so.” Ryan laughed as Greg moaned, nudging him with his head. “Hey, what time does your flight leave tomorrow?”
 
“Why are you reminding me?” Greg’s voice was groggy, slurred with sleep.
 
“Because I’m not letting you take a taxi, this time.”
 
“Only because you’re going to have to wake me up.”
 
“Come here.”
 
Greg finally opened his eyes, looking at Ryan as he he’d grown a third head. “You don’t really expect me do move, do you?”
 
“Do I look like I want to move?”
 
“Well, you actually look like a blurry-”
 
Ryan didn’t even bother to hear the rest of what Greg thought he looked like. Instead, he grabbed Greg from beneath his arms, grunting as he brought Greg on top of him. Of course, Greg looked like he weighed nothing, but that didn’t mean he did actually did weigh nothing.
 
But it was either that or Ryan would have do something that resembled voluntary movement that involved moving more than his arms.
 
“And you call me lazy,” Greg said as he moved himself further up Ryan’s body, relishing in the feeling of Ryan’s bare skin again his as he rested his face on Ryan’s cheek.
 
“Greg, get your hair out of my face.”
 
“I didn’t drag my body on yours.”
 
“I thought you were sleepy,” Ryan accused, one eye closed as he peered up at Greg, squinting through the mess of hair and skin.
 
“I can do that the flight.”
 
“You always say that but you never do.”
 
“I don’t mind. I just don’t like falling asleep when I’m with you.”
 
Ryan bit the inside of his cheek. For the third time today, Greg was being more sappy than usual. It didn’t necessarily irk Ryan, but Greg must have been incredibly tired to be so open like that. “Well, go to sleep anyway.” He tucked Greg’s head under his chin, letting the other man adjust to the new position.
 
“I’ll be right here.”