Title: Have Yourself a Very Drunken Christmas
By: Beverly
Pairing: Gil/Nick
Rating: NC-17
Genre: First Time, Holiday, Romance
Summary: When Gil walks into his favorite Christmas Eve' hangout, he finds someone who will change everything...
Author's notes: Written for the 2005 SAC
Beta by Star/Gil, thanks so much.

Friday, Dec 23rd

"What do you mean...all flights are cancelled?"

The young woman behind the desk of TWA became nervous. "I...ah...this is the info I got, sir. I'm sorry. There is a blizzard in Dallas, so the airport is closed down, and all incoming and outgoing fligths have been cancelled."

Nick Stokes sighed deeply. So much for his trip home on Christmas. He looked up and found the girl's gaze almost anxiously resting on him. He tried to give her a smile, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "It's okay. It's not your fault. Thanks, ma'am."

He grabbed his bag, threw it over his shoulder and left the airport building. A soft breeze caressed his face, and he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Well, Christmas in Las Vegas...things could be worse, right?

No.

He had the next six days off. What should he do? He couldn't walk into the lab and say ‘Hi, guess what. I'm back.' But on the other hand...six days and six nights for himself. With no dead bodies, no blood, no traces, no hot leads to follow...

...and no Gil Grissom.

Somehow this thought pulled him abruptly out of his warm, mellow thoughts. He sighed again deeply. Then he walked over to his jeep, climbed in, and drove home.

********************************

Gil Grissom wrote the last word on his report, closed the file, and sighed softly.

Done.

He was ready, finished, all i's were dotted, all t's crossed. And now? Now he had the next three days off. He gazed outside his door, watched the usual buzz in the lab, people running around, yelling, Hodges was stalking Greg while Greg tried his best to avoid the annoying young man...everything was running the way it was supposed to. And best of all...tomorrow was the traditional Christmas Brunch at Catherine's.

He smiled. The only thing he was going to miss would be Nick. He had taken an early flight to spend Christmas in Texas with his family like every year. But in a few days he would be back. Back in Vegas, where Grissom could have an eye on him. Could protect him.

He cast a quick glance at his watch and got ready to leave. There were a few errands he had to run before the brunch started.

*******************************

Saturday, Dec 24th

Nick awoke slowly. Today was the 24th.

Christmas.

It wasn't the first time that he wasn't home for Christmas, but it was the first time that he was alone. He turned around and snuggled closer into his pillow.

Alone.

He thought about what he could do today. Maybe he could go shopping. At least a little bit. He could go into the shopping mall. Or he could go downtown, stroll along the shop-windows. Or he could drive to this weird little place he had discovered a few weeks ago. The shop that sold all sorts of crazy things. Crazy things such as bugs. Strange bugs. Rare bugs.

Beautiful bugs. Bugs that would make Gil's eyes sparkle.

He smiled as he stretched like a big cat. Yes, that he would do. And then he'd go back to work in five days, and maybe he would find the courage to give Gil one of those beautiful bugs as a Christmas gift.

*******************************

Saturday, Dec 24th

The brunch was perfect, just as Catherine was used to. It was the fifth time this year, and everyone was having a good time. After three hours of eating, talking, laughing and drinking, the table reminded her of a battlefield. Warrick was busy opening the fourth bottle of prosecco, and Sara was goofing around with Greg. They laughed almost hysterically about some rock-star-imitation Greg had just performed. Al was sitting comfortably on his chair, watching his friends with a very content smile, a glass of red wine in his hand. Jim Brass was sitting on the other end of the table, watching with a gentle smile the friendly dispute between Sara and Greg.

Catherine didn't know what he was thinking, but if she interpreted the smile on his face right, then there was something going on between the captain and the former lab rat.

Greg had changed over the years. The young man who had been famous for his overloud rock music, his weekly changing hair color and the extraordinary clothes had grown up. He was now a CSI Level One, and he seemed determined to prove to Gil that the trust he had put in the young man hadn't been in vain.

Her gaze went to the other end of the room where Hodges played cards with her daughter Lindsey. The case with Nick, terrible as it had been, had brought out the best in all of them. Even in Hodges.

Catherine leaned back in her chair, sipped on her prosecco, and watched her family. Everyone was happy and content.

Everyone, except for her old friend Gil Grissom, who was sitting next to her. He was absentminded, his fingers were playing with a napkin and his mind seemed to be a million miles away. Carefully, so as not to startle him, she put a hand on his arm.

"Gil?"

He looked up at her, and there was something in his eyes that made her catch her breath for a second. An emotion so profound, and so honest that it almost made her cry. A bone-deep sadness. But one second it was there, the next it was gone, and suddenly she wasn't sure if it really had been there.

"Yes, Catherine?"

He smiled, but somehow it didn't reach his eyes.

"Are you all right? You seem...I don't know...absentminded? Not quite here."

Now his smile faded a little. "I'm okay, Cath," he said after a few moments.

She reciprocated his smile but was far from being convinced.

****************************

"I'm okay, Cath."

It sounded lame even to his own ears. Okay? He wasn't okay. Not even close to okay.

He missed Nick. Missed him terribly. Though Nick had never been on one of Catherine's Christmas Brunch's, this year Gil missed him more than ever.

How much did he wish to have him here now, to have him near, to protect him. To look out for him. To see him and to know that he was all right.

But he was with his parents in Texas. And so Gil would end this day in Nick's favorite bar. Like he always did. That way he would feel near him...at least a little bit.

And for a little time.

He managed to convince Catherine that he was okay, and an hour later he left her, kissed her cheek like he did every year, and drove home. Like every year.

Then he went to bed, to get an eyeful of sleep. Like every year. And at nine o'clock that night he would go to ‘Pedro's Bodega', Nick's usual hangout.

Just like every year.

With a deep sigh, Gil turned around, pulled the covers over his shoulder and tried to go to sleep. But sleep refused to come for the next hours.

***********************************

In the end, he had slept longer than planned, so it was way past midnight when Gil finally arrived at ‘Pedro's Bodega'.

Pedro, the Bodega's owner, waved at him and smiled broadly.

"Gilberto, mi amigo. Come...come over. I have your usual place reserved for you," he shouted loudly over the music.

Gil smiled, but then he frowned when he saw someone sitting on his usual place. A figure that seemed almost painfully familiar. But it was too dark to see him clearly. Gil looked over at Pedro, who shrugged apologetically.

"I had no other table free, Gilberto. I'm sorry. But he won't disturb you. He's a very nice guest. Almost a friend. He comes here very often. But today...it's the first time he came on Christmas Eve. Seemed so lonely, the poor guy. I gave him your table. He won't bother you. Had his fourth beer. Very quiet. I hope you don't mind?"

Pedro's voice sounded questioning at the end of his little speech, and Gil only shook his head.

"No, Pedro. It's okay. Bring me the usual, okay?"

Casually, he walked over to his table and sat down. The man sitting there didn't react. He continued to stare down into his glass. Pedro came, and silently he put a glass down in front of Gil. He nodded his thank you, and Pedro walked over to his other guests.

For almost half an hour they sat like that in silence, until the other man slowly raised his head and looked over the dance floor. And that was when Gil's breath caught in his throat.

Nick.

There was no mistaking him for someone else. The dark hair, the strong jaw now not hidden by the shadows any longer...

But why was he here? Shouldn't he be in Texas? Celebrating with his family?

Suddenly he found those dark brown eyes directed at himself, and for a second Gil forgot to breathe. But amazingly enough, Nick didn't seem to recognize him. He only gazed at him for a long time, then laughed harshly.

"You remind me of someone," he slurred drunkenly and looked back into his glass.

"Really? Who?" Gil answered nonchalant.

Another bitter laugh, but this time there was a twinge of sadness in it. Nick took another deep gulp of his beer. "M'boss," he murmured finally.

Gil's hands closed around his own glass as a sudden pain flashed through him.

"Is that good?" he forced himself to ask. And was surprised when he noticed a sudden change in Nick's expression. His face became soft, and in his eyes there was something...something unreadable. But then he looked down in his glass again, and murmured barely audible, "No. T'hurts only."

Gil cocked his head slightly. "It hurts? Why does it hurt?"

The head went down a little deeper, and for a second Gil thought if Nick'd bent his head a few inches more, he'd be able to inhale his beer.

Then he recognized that the younger man had answered him, but he hadn't heard him. He moved a little closer and asked, "Huh?"

Nick raised his head again and said, a little louder this time, but still he didn't look at him. "It hurts because I'm in love with him. And he doesn't even now I exist."

For a few moments, Gil was stunned and didn't know what to say. ‘Oh Nicky,' he thought. ‘Of course do I know that you exist. I know exactly what it feels like to love someone so much it hurts.'

Nick ordered another beer, and when Pedro brought it, Gil caught a look of the younger man's beer-mat and could see that it was his fifth beer. He whistled slightly. Wow, Nick would have a hell of hangover the next morning. Maybe he should try to slow him down a bit.

But how?

When his gaze wandered across the room, he noticed the dancing couples. Men dancing with women, men with men, and women with women. Somehow this night seemed to be only about love, not about predjudices. Should he...?

Never before had he had the wish to participate in the dancing, but now...seeing Nick sitting next to him, so lonely, so heartsick...so forlorn...suddenly it seemed to be easy. He stood up and held out his hand to Nick.

"Wanna dance?"

Nick looked up, and Gil thought he saw something like recognition dawn in those beautiful eyes. But it was gone before it was even there. Nick took the proffered hand, got up, and stumbled slightly, falling directly into Gil's arms. He giggled a happy, drunken giggle, and Gil's arms closed automatically around the slender form to steady him.

"Whoa there, Nicky...not so fast. Come on. Put an arm around my waist. Yeah, that's it."

Together they walked to the dance floor, where Nick without any hesitation put his arms around Gil, pulled him close, laid his head on the older man's shoulder, and closed his eyes with a very contented sigh.

They swayed together like that for almost an hour. Gil didn't know that he was able to dance so long, but to have a sweet drunken Nick in his arms, pressing close, humming softly was an incredible motivation.

But suddenly Nick seemed to slide down his body, and Gil caught him just in time.

"Hey, Nicky," he shook him slightly. "Are you still with me?"

Very slowly Nick opened his eyes and gazed up at Gil. And Gil was unable to look away. He saw the young man's face move closer. And closer. And just before their lips touched, he whispered, "Are you sure?" Nick only nodded, and closed those last few millimetres, kissing Gil.

For Gil it was like a dream. Nick's lips were as soft as he had imagined, the younger man's hands moved away from his neck and closed gently around his face, keeping him in place.

His last coherent thought was that it should be prohibited to kiss like that...then he forgot to think...

****************************

Nick's head was killing him. That was the first thing he recogniced. That and the fact that the bed was turning at a terrible speed. Carefully, he let one foot drop to the floor to slow the bed down. Then, very slowly, he opened one eye, and his gaze fell on dark wooden drawers.

That was strange. He had no such drawers in his bedroom. His furniture wasn't so dark. He wanted to stretch himself, when suddenly a strong arm around his waist tightened, a warm body snuggled closer to his, soft breath puffed against his neck, and then the other one lay still again.

Nick slowly let out a breath he hadn't been aware he had been holding, when a soft kiss to his neck made him shiver.

And not in a bad way, he thought, when he felt little Nicky respond to this tender gesture. But whom was the man laying behind him? Because the erection pressed up against his ass was a clear indication that he wasn't sharing his bed with a woman.

"I know that you're awake," a familiar voice behind him grumbled sleepily, and Nick froze. ‘Oh shit!!!' was his first thought. Not that...not...

Gil Grissom moved up on one elbow, kissed Nick's naked (*oh god...why am I naked?* screamed his mind) shoulder, and then rested his head lovingly on said shoulder.

"Good morning, Nicky," he practically purred.

Purred? Gil Grissom NEVER purred. WHAT THE HELL HAD HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?

"I...ah...you...Gil?"

"M-hm?" Again this...purring. Nick shivered once more. A kiss followed this little movement of his body, and involuntarily he pressed a little closer and smiled. For a few heartbeats he forgot what he'd wanted to say. To lie here with Gil spooned up behind him was all he had ever wished for.

"Gil, what happened last night?" He held his breath, but Gil laughed only slightly.

"Don't you remember?"

Nick shook his head hesitantly. Another kiss. Then strong arms turned him gently around, until he found himself nose to nose with Gil, gazing deep into those amazing blue eyes.

"Nothing. We kissed, we caressed each other a little bit, we cuddled, and that's it. You were...ah...were..."

"...full like a lantern?" Nick finished the sentence with a smirk. Gil nodded.

"Yes. Thank you. Suddenly between two kisses you fell asleep."

The younger man hung his head in shame, but Gil gently took his chin and moved his head upwards again, so he could keep the eye contact.

"And that's it. There's nothing you have to be ashamed of, Nicky."

Suddenly a little devil began to dance in Nick's dark eyes, and Gil cocked his head.

"Good."

"Good?" Gil frowned. And found himself all of a sudden with an armful of laughing Texan. Nick practically jumped the older man, straddled him, and bent down to kiss him slow, deep and loving.

"It would have been a shame not to remember something like this, huh?" Nick whispered before he kissed him again, and again. It was as if he was addicted to those lips, and in a way he was.

Slowly he moved his lips across Gil's jaw, along his neck, kissing his way downwards, worshipping the body beneath his hands and his lips. Gil began to breathe harder, and when Nick's strong fingers finally closed around his hard cock, he almost came. He bit his lips hard, tried to prevent his climax, to hold it back, but when Nick's warm breath ghosted over the sensitive skin of his penis and he felt the warm, wet tongue, he was lost. He came with a harsh shout and with tears in his eyes.

It took him a while but when he came down again, Gil found Nick still resting between his legs, gently fondling his meanwhile limp penis. Slowly, but insistently, the younger man now pushed at Gil's leg, causing him to put his leg up, granting Nick better access to the older man's body.

Slowly, carefully, yet full of hunger and desire, Nick began to open him up, to prepare him for their lovemaking. He kissed him, licked him, pushed first one, then two, finally three fingers inside the tight channel of his lover's body.

Gil was way beyond his ability to speak, he could only grunt, sigh, moan and gasp. For Nick, those were the most erotic sounds he had ever heard. Then under all those little sounds Gil was making, Nick could hear the words, "Fuck me, Nicky...please..."

Nick moved up again, took Gil's lips in a hard, almost brutal kiss. Then the kiss softened, and Nick whispered against his lover's mouth, "No. I'll make love to you, babe. I love you, Gil."

He quickly lubed himself up, before he started to breach his lover's body. With an odd little sound that Nick found adorable, Gil let his head fall back, and he gripped Nick's arms hard.

"God, Nicky, yesss..." he moaned.

Nick remained motionless and tried desperately not to lose control. But it was hard...it was so terribly hard with Gil's taste on his tongue, with his smell in the air, and with his heat surrounding him...

It was a little movement of Gil's hips that undid him totally. Gil pushed just this tiny little bit up, and took him in deep...so unbelievably deep. With a loud shout Nick's head dropped back, and he began to move. Out, unwillingly because it felt so good to be inside his lover, and with a quick movement back inside. Back into this hot, explosive heat. Two more thrusts, and Nick came.

He broke down over his lover, panting, soaked in sweat with his heart beating wildly. Strong arms closed around his shaking form, and he could feel a single tear fall down.

"I love you, Gil," he whispered, barely audible. He could feel the covers pulled over his trembling body, then a soft hand in his hair that caressed him gently.

"Merry Christmas, my love," Gil whispered lovingly.

And Nick cuddled closer and smiled.

The end