Title: Citrus
By: Caroline Crane
Fandom: CSI: Vegas
Pairing: Nick/Greg
Rating: R
Summary: That thing about lemons neutralizing the smell of decomp doesn't actually work that well in practice, but it's canon, so let's go with it. For rabidfan, just because. There's a whole lot of naked and absolutely no porn, which just goes to show you should be careful what you wish for.
A/N: The idea came about when I happened to glance at the latest contrelamontre challenge. Then I happened to glance at a comment about my lack of Nick/Greg-writing that made me feel sort of guilty, so I figured what the hell. This also takes care of the Nick/Greg first kiss someone requested, because I am not above totally cheating.

With apologies to Kevin Smith for the lame riff.

Sara so owes me for this, Greg thought as he covered his mouth to try to block the smell coming from the house. It was no use; the air was thick with the stench of rotting flesh, making his eyes water and his stomach roll.

And it would just figure that Sara would call in sick for the first time in…like, ever on the night that somebody finally noticed the smell coming from this place and called the cops.

He should have turned his cell phone off. He should have ignored the dispatch call and buried his head further under the pillow, pretended he hadn't heard and dealt with the consequences tomorrow. It was his night off, after all, and besides, everybody knew Sara wasn't sick. What she was was halfway across the country by now, taking the Red Eye to the middle of nowhere to shack up with Grissom.

They thought they had everybody in the lab fooled, but Greg wasn't stupid. He'd caught on almost as soon as it started, and he'd even thought it was kind of sweet until he found himself pulling bodies out of a wall on his night off.

Not that he really minded if Sara took off on a long-distance booty call; one of them should be getting some, and his well had been pretty dry lately. But he minded this case, minded the stench following him away from the house and clinging to his clothes and God, he could still smell it even after he got in his car.

As soon as he thought it a knock sounded on his window, and he looked up to find Nick watching him.

"Hey," Nick called through the glass, grinning as Greg rolled the window down. "Can I catch a ride? Catherine drove out here and she already headed back with the bodies."

"Yeah, whatever," Greg answered, working hard not to breathe as Nick moved away from the window. He smelled just as bad as Greg did; they all reeked, and he'd been around the lab long enough to know this stench wasn't going to come out easily.

Nick made small talk on the way back to the lab, going over what they knew about the case so far and laying out his theory about who exactly the bodies used to be. Greg half-listened, nodding whenever Nick paused and pretending he cared whether or not the bodies in that house were that missing crew of bank robbers who'd dropped off the face of the earth awhile back.

It made sense, granted, and it would make their lives easier if this was just a case of one bad guy taking a bigger cut for himself rather than the work of a serial killer. But Greg couldn't get himself to care, because he smelled like death – literally – and he was exhausted and he wasn't even supposed to be here today.

When they finally made it back to the lab Greg grabbed his kit and dropped his samples off, but even the prospect of subjecting Hodges to his stench wasn't enough to cheer him up. What he wanted…well, what he really wanted was to be home in bed while Sara was stuck at the lab, doing her best to look professional while she tried not to puke from her own smell, but he'd settle for not smelling like a corpse.

And yeah, she was his friend and all, so he was happy for her. Happy enough to cover her shift without giving her too much shit about it, but there was a small part of him that sort of resented the fact that she and Grissom – of all people – were off doing things he really didn't want to think about while he was stuck here alone.

Not that he was jealous. He'd gotten over his crush on Sara a long time ago, and Grissom…Greg shuddered at the thought and pushed the locker room door open, tugging his shirt over his head and tossing it in the nearest trash can. He spared a moment of silence for his Ramones t-shirt before he kicked off his shoes, then his socks before he reached for the button on his jeans.

His jeans and underwear joined the t-shirt in the trash before he wrapped a towel around his waist and headed for the showers. And he could still smell it, clinging to his skin and his hair and making his stomach turn. He turned the shower on as hot as he could stand it and hung his towel on the nearest hook, closing his eyes to let the water wash over him.

And he definitely was not thinking about what Sara and Grissom were doing with his day off, but it didn't seem fair that he got stuck with her lousy case and he didn't even have anyone to go home to. Not that anyone would want him coming home smelling like this, and even after he scrubbed his hair he could still smell it. He reached for the soap and started on his skin, rubbing as hard as he could until finally he smelled like…soap and death.

He was already mentally calculating the number of layers he'd have to take off before his skin smelled like him again when the door to the men's showers opened. Greg glanced up automatically, watching as Nick came in carrying what looked like a bag of tennis balls.

"Here," Nick said, and he sounded sort of embarrassed, "these will help."

As soon as he said it Greg realized what he was carrying, and he rolled his eyes at himself. Everybody knew lemon juice would help neutralize the smell, but he'd been so desperate to get out of his rancid clothes that he hadn't even thought about it.

"Where'd you get these?"

"I called ahead and got one of the interns to run to the grocery store," Nick answered, stepping under the shower head next to Greg's and dropping his towel and…wow.

He knew how much Nick worked out, and he knew exactly how good he looked with his clothes on, but this was the first time he'd gotten a look at Nick completely naked. And he was…amazing was the first word that came to mind, better even than Greg's raunchier fantasies, because this was the real live version and was Nick blushing?

As soon as Greg thought it he realized he was staring, so he cleared his throat and reached for one of the lemons. "Thanks," he said, grateful that Nick had thought to get the intern to cut them in half. He scrubbed at his skin with the lemon this time, and it probably wouldn't have stung quite so much if he hadn't already rubbed his skin raw, but he didn't mind.

It was a distraction from Nick, anyway, wet and naked and perfect next to him and Greg would be jerking off to that image for weeks. Okay, months, because he had to reach for another lemon sometime, and when he did he caught sight of Nick's hands sliding over his skin. Down his stomach, squeezing lemon juice as he went and not even the sting of the lemon juice was going to get Greg's cock to behave now.

He turned away and tried his best to think of rotting bodies holed up in a wall out in the desert, but there was no way he could stop thinking about Nick. Not when it had been way too long since he'd had sex with anyone other than himself, when he was tired and annoyed and all his defenses were down.

And the smell wasn't quite so bad anymore, so Greg was pretty sure it was safe to get out of the shower. He could probably stand himself now, and anyway if he didn't leave he was going to do something he'd regret. He reached for the shower and started to turn the water off, but before he got that far Nick was clearing his throat.

"You…uh…should do your hair too," Nick said, voice embarrassed and Greg couldn't help it; he had to look. He tried to stop himself, but his body didn't listen and before he could stop he was turning and watching Nick reach into the grocery bag for another half a lemon.

"Here," Nick said, gesturing in the direction of Greg's head and before Greg could react Nick was squeezing lemon juice into his hair. Then he was rubbing it in, and Nick Stokes was naked and touching him, and he was going to be jerking off to this for the rest of his life.

He should have stopped it. Should have backed away and told Nick he could handle it, but Nick's fingers felt really good in his hair and it had already been a bad enough night without ruining this too. So he leaned into Nick's touch instead, letting his eyes fall closed and if he let out a little moan when Nick hit the knot at the back of his scalp, they both pretended not to notice.

And it definitely wasn't the kind of thing two guys who were supposed to be just friends did. Greg had never pretended to be a hundred percent straight, but Nick did, and this was something he never would have expected. Sure, there were the shy smiles and the occasional touches, but those had stopped right around the time Greg started going out in the field, and Greg had finally convinced himself that he'd been misinterpreting Nick's signals. Except there was only one way to interpret this, and when Nick's hands finally left his hair Greg found himself disappointed.

"That should be good," Nick said, voice low and really close and Greg knew if he turned around Nick would be standing right behind him. And the fact that Nick Stokes was making a pass at him in the showers where anyone could find them – and after the worst case they'd had in awhile – was way too weird. He had to be dreaming, only if he was dreaming Nick would be kissing him already.

"Nick, what…" Greg began, trailing off when he realized he wasn't even sure how to ask what was going on. It was like some kind of fucked up alternate reality, because he'd just showered with Nick Stokes and instead of trying to kiss him, Nick had decided to wash his hair.

He forced himself to turn and face Nick, taking in the shy grin and the perfect body and this time he didn't even bother to pretend he wasn't looking.

"The lemon juice helps neutralize the smell."

"Yeah, I know," Greg answered, stopping just short of rolling his eyes, because Nick was really hot, but he was also really clueless. "I just…what's going on here? Not that I'm complaining or anything."

For a second he wasn't sure Nick was going to answer. He still looked sort of embarrassed, but his smile was gone and Greg was pretty sure he'd just screwed everything up. And they were both still naked right out where anyone could walk in on them, but he wasn't about to walk away until Nick told him what had just happened. Because it was weird, but kind of sweet too, and he wanted it to mean more than just Nick trying to be the world's nicest guy.

"Sorry," Nick finally said, looking anywhere but at Greg now and that couldn't be good. "Look, you just seemed so miserable about being stuck on this case, and I knew if I let you out of here like that you'd still reek. But I shouldn't have…"

"Hey," Greg interrupted, surprising Nick into looking at him and someday he was going to learn to keep his stupid mouth shut and just be thankful when life handed him something totally unexpected, but completely amazing. "I said I wasn't complaining."

And just like that Nick's grin was back, hopeful this time and making Greg's stomach flutter as he leaned forward to press a kiss to the corner of Greg's mouth. It was soft at first, just a press of lips on lips, but as soon as he realized what was happening Greg gripped the back of Nick's hair and turned into the kiss.

He'd imagined this more times than he could count, but he'd never imagined that they'd both be naked before they even kissed for the first time. He always pictured a frenzy of clothes being pulled off, stumbling through the darkness in one of their houses after a long shift or an early breakfast. He'd definitely never imagined the tastes of lemon and county water, of public showers where anyone could walk in.

Which was the flaw in this whole plan, of course, because a second later Nick was tensing and pulling away. It took Greg another second to realize why, and when he heard the door open he ducked back under his own shower and turned to the wall, wrenching the water all the way to the cold setting.

"There better be some lemons left for me," Warrick rumbled as he dropped his towel and turned on one of the free showers. Greg didn't look as Nick laughed and handed over the bag, then turned off his shower and reached for his towel. He didn't look at anything at all as he fumbled for his own towel and wrapped it around his waist, picturing icebergs and grandmothers and decomposing bodies until he made it safely back to the locker room.

He could hear Nick and Warrick discussing the case in voices muffled by the door, tried hard not to picture Nick standing there watching Warrick shower like it was the most normal thing in the world. Like he hadn't just been making out with Greg two minutes ago.

Greg managed to get his spare jeans on before Nick appeared in the locker room, still wearing nothing but a towel and a sheepish grin and Greg wasn't sure if it was because they'd almost gotten caught or if he was about to get the 'that was a mistake' speech. Although the fact that Nick was grinning at all was a good sign, because just a few hours ago Greg would have figured he'd be panicking right now.

"Listen, G, I'm really sorry," Nick began, and Greg's heart sank as he braced himself for the speech. He'd known it was too good to be true, but if Warrick hadn't shown up when he did, at least he would have gotten more than just a kiss to remember when he was alone in his bed. "Bad timing. I forgot Rick was right behind us."

And okay, so maybe he wasn't about to get the speech after all. Greg ventured a glance over his shoulder as he reached for a fresh shirt, watching as Nick crossed the locker room to stop next to him. "It was worth it just to picture his face if he'd walked in a couple minutes later."

Nick laughed at that, soft and kind of breathy and even in the lousy light of the locker room Greg could tell that his ears were turning a little pink. And it was kind of funny to picture Warrick's face if he caught them in the act, but the problem was that now Greg was picturing it too.

"You interested in picking up where we left off later? Maybe someplace a little more private?"

"My shower or yours?" Greg asked, pasting on his most charming grin, but it didn't stop the butterflies in his stomach.

"Whichever's closer," Nick answered, leaning in to brush a soft kiss against Greg's mouth before he pulled away again. And he wanted to stay and watch Nick get dressed, but Warrick would be out of the shower any second, and anyway there was no way Greg could keep his hands to himself if he stayed. So he slid his shoes back on and forced himself out of the locker room, not letting himself look back to see if Nick was watching him.

And he still had a few hours of work to get through, but he was starting to think maybe Sara should call in sick more often.