Title: Nick's Magical... Cold Medicine
By: it-glitters
Pairing: Nick/Greg
Rating: R
Prompt: #16 Cold Medicine for csianti_block on LJ
Word Count: 1,194
Author's Notes: So, and I constantly text message each other as a form of RP for and since work was especially boring today, I managed to write this (with her input, of course).
Summary: Ficlet. Written for a cold medicine challenge. Nick's high, and Greg has to take care of him.

***

"Greg." Nick tried to nudge Greg awake. "You have to wake up. I have a magic cock."

Greg rolled over and rubbed his eyes blearily. "Shouldn't you be asleep? You're sick." He was pretty sure that Nick had just stated that he had a magic cock, but he wasn't going to ask him to explain.

"Greg?" Nick asked again, apparently not tired, despite the fever that forced him home early from work.

"Yes, Nick?" Greg was cranky. He had spent the day caring for Nick, barely getting any sleep for himself. Nick was a very demanding, very whiny sick man.

"I think the cat might want me dead." Nick's voice was suddenly muffled.

Greg rolled back over to face Nick, but the cat was covering Nick's face. Greg lifted the cat away and placed him on the floor. "You look horrible, Nicky," Greg said as he dusted the stray cat hairs from Nick's face and pillow.

Nick pouted and then rubbed his face against the pillow like it was the best thing in the world. It went on for two minutes before Greg finally put his hand on Nick's cheek to get him to stop and to see if Nick still had a fever. He didn't seem to have one.

"Do you want some water, Nick?"

Nick nodded and then rolled onto his back. "Would you still love me if I looked like this all the time?" He grabbed a tissue and blew. When he was done, he dropped it to the side of the bed where a large pile was already amassing.

Greg got out of bed and refilled Nick's water glass in the bathroom sink. "That's a stupid question. You know I would." He placed the water next to Nick and sat down on the edge of bed, making sure that Nick's toes were fully covered by the blankets that had been pulled up during the night.

"Would you still love me if my cock got gangrene and fell off?"

"Of course I… wait, what?" Greg touched his hand to Nick's face again and then went to get another blanket. "Why would you get gangrene there?"

"Not the point," Nick said dreamily as he curled up wit the new blanket and rubbed his cheek against the pillow again. "The point was the question, and the question was if you would love me or not if my cock fell off."

Greg figured Nick was just bored and too sick sleep, so he indulged him. "Well, we would just have to get you a sex change operation."

Nick stuck his mouth and nose beneath the blankets. "Don't wanna be a girl."

"But I would need something besides myself to play with sexually," Greg said as he ran his hand over the blankets as he attempted to calm Nick down.

Nick shook his head from beneath the blanket and sighed. "What if I grow a second penis?"

"Well," Greg started as he crawled over Nick and into his own side of the bed, "then there wouldn't be a problem. You'd replace the missing one."

"No," Nick said, coming out of his blankets and propping himself up on his elbows. "What if I grow another cock?"

"OK, ow, no." Then Greg pondered the reasoning behind the question for a moment – or, at least he tried. This wasn't typical Nick conversation. "Nicky, did you put anything ‘special' in your cold medicine?"

Nick bounced on the bed a little. "Nooooo… What if I could fuck you and fuck myself at the same time?"

Greg cocked an eyebrow. "Nick, focus. Your cold medicine?"

Nick pouted for a minute. "You were sleeping and I was sick. The first dose didn't work."

"The first dose? How many did you take?" Greg frantically sat up on the bed and tried to check Nick's pupils to see if there was any signs of overdose.

"Two. You were asleep and I felt bad, but now I feel great!" He threw his arms up for added emphasis, and promptly fell back against the bed.

"Nick," Greg said solemnly. "There is a reason you don't take two doses. This is that reason."

Nick giggled… or what Greg would have classified as a giggle for lack of anything better to call it. "Greg, I wanted you to know a secret." Nick leaned in close. "Greg, my cock… is magic." He burst into a fit of laughter and then was subdued by a fit of coughing.

"You and your magic cock need to drink that water and then go to sleep," Greg chastised.

"Wanna fuck?" Nick asked between coughs.

"No," Greg snapped back, handing Nick the water. "Even if I did, which I don't, you told me earlier that you don't have sex when you're sick."

Nick gulped at the water and then looked Greg dead in the eyes. "But it's hard. It wants to spew its magic."

"Nicholas Stokes, despite what you may think, your cock doesn't have magic powers."

Nick cocked his head to one side before throwing off the blankets. At some point, he had decided to take off his pants, even though his shirt was still on. "See," he said gesturing to the area, "it's like granite. It's my granite cock."

Greg looked down at the nearly flaccid penis that lay against Nick's thigh. Nick might have been marginally aroused, but it was definitely not hard. "If you want to make your… magic spew then you need to do it yourself." Greg stood up and grabbed his pillow. "I'm going on the couch."

"No!"

"Nick's it's barely hard, regardless of what your cold medicine-addled brain thinks."

"I have a granite cock!" Nick thrusted his hips a little. "Granite!"

Greg signed in frustration and pulled the blankets up to Nick's shoulders. "You, and your granite cock need to sleep."

"Sing to me," Nick said, snuggling back into bed and apparently forgetting his granite cock, at least for the moment.

Greg got up and refilled Nick's water glass. "I have conditions. The first of which is that you stop talking nonsense about your cock and anything related to sex for that matter. You are very unsexy right now, no matter how much I love you. Secondly, you are never to take cold medicine without my express permission. I can't trust you with the stuff, you junkie."

"Anything else?" Nick asked with a sniffle.

"Yes." Greg pulled several tissues from the box and handed them to Nick. "Blow your nose, Snotty."

Nick blew and dropped the wad of tissues next to the bed again. Greg looked down and grimaced, fairly sure that he was going to leave that pile of tissues there until Nick was healthy enough to clean it up for himself.

"Deal," Nick said softly. "I'm sleepy." He curled himself into the fetal position and closed his eyes. "You should sing now."

Greg sat up and sang the Norwegian song that he had grown up listening to his grandmother sing to him when he was ill. When he was finished, all he could hear were Nick's congested snores and occasional sniffles. He quietly picked up his book and made his way to the living room.

***