Title: Oh, no, that’s a blatant falsehood…
Author: Dee
Rating: PG
Word Count: 476
Pairings: Gil and Nick
Characters: Gil Grissom and Nick Stokes..
Warnings: Absolute fluff
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: In my dreams they are like, totally mine!
Beta: jayceepat and podga for their invaluable help in the Americanisation of the fic and their insightful comments. I thank high_striker for his wonderful icons. I am indebted to them all. Any errors are mine.
A/N: I saw the video of WP in New York, judging the thingy song contest and the camera was behind him; then it was very CLOSE behind and I’m sorry to say that he has a….

“I’m telling you man, it’s not a lie; would I lie to you?”

“Then you’re joking me, and if you don’t mind me saying, it’s not funny.”

“I do mind you saying that I’m joking because I’m not; look, I realise how serious it is, but it was bound to happen sooner or later.”

“Not necessarily so. Some men don’t ever.”

“True, but not many. What about your Daddy?”

“Twenty years younger, than I am now, when he died, so no.”

“Granddaddy?”

“Oh, stop it; you can go on all day until you find an appropriate relative.”

“Don’t get pissy with me, it’s not my fault.”

“Well you told me; you could have left me in ignorance.”

“Oh, of course I could, until Catherine pointed it out and then I’d get it in the neck for not forewarning you. I can’t win.”

“I can’t see it, you are joking aren’t you?”

“No.”

“Well you must be, because it isn’t there.”

“If you were a contortionist, then you’d have no problem.”

“Do something with mirrors then.”

“Oh, for God’s sake, we haven’t got a hand held mirror, have we?”

“There must be one somewhere. Look under the wash basin, there must be one there.”

“Not when I last cleaned it out.”

“Had they invented mirrors back then?”

“I tell you, man, you are so cruising…..”

“….so are you for trying to pull a fast one.”

“No, I’m not. If you don’t believe me then fair enough, have it your own way. Pretend it doesn’t exist, I’m outta here.”

“Oh Nicky, don’t go, you can’t leave me like this, this is a big moment in any man’s life, wait until it’s your turn.”

“You think I’ll make a fuss like you are?”

“Yes.”

“I don’t think so; I’m all growed up now.”

“I need a little TLC, Nicky?”

“Ahhh, so you accept that I’m right, do you?”

“You could be, I suppose, but it’s very traumatic for me.”

“Yeah, you need me to run my fingers through your soft, silky, curls…….before it’s too late?”

“NICKY….HOW COULD YOU?”

“Easily…baldy!”

“NICK, you bastard, I've never seen this mean streak in you before, I always thought you were a gentle soul.”

”Yeah, that was before you became a petulant, whining, balding…..”

“….you can sleep in the spare bed tonight.”

“Hey. We could look for a toupee for you…..”

“….you can sleep on the deck.”

“Fair enough….I did hear, though, that rubbing semen into the bald patch could make it grow back.”

“Nothing but an old wives tale……do you think we could try it?”

“Not if I’m out on the deck.”

“Oh, well, I suppose you can come back in then. Will you be nice to me though, because I am feeling vulnerable?”

“Okay……ba…..babe.”

“Watch it.”

“Watch it? You mean stare at it…..”

“Nicky…..”

The End