Title: For Warrick
By: rowandaze
Pairing: gen
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Post "For Gedda"
Summary: This is something he has to do alone.He has been standing, staring at the body for over an hour. He wants to cry, to shout, to shake his fists and ask why but he is so full of sadness that he feels nothing but tiredness. A heavy blanket of tiredness trapping him, stopping him from feeling anything else.
He can't believe that this has happened, that Warrick lies dead in front of him. Grissom had called him first with the news, his words so full of anguish he found he couldn't really listen. As the details sank in he had felt dizzy and needed to sit. Someone nearby helped him into a chair and he paused for a moment in confusion. He heard Grissom's voice echoing from the cell phone he had forgotten was in his hands. He responded to him with stuttered words.
It had taken all of his strength to open the door to the coroners' lab. He had opened that door a thousands times over but never to see one of their own.
He refused to accept company. He had to do this alone. He had expected Grissom to protest but Grissom is loosing control. Warrick was always Grissom's rock even with all his recent problems and now that his rock is gone the foundations of his perfectly controlled world are crumbing.
He knew Catherine wouldn't stay. The sight of Warrick's body had shaken her close to collapse and she sat outside lost in pain and anguish.
He thinks of Sara. She will be alone when she hears the news and he knows how much that will hurt her. He wonders if she had been there whether she would have offered to come in with him, if she could have held it together. If she had, he thinks he might have let her stay with him.
It was Greg who had protested and said he would join him. Greg, their baby CSI forced to grow before he was ever ready to. He had pleaded and almost convinced him that he should not be alone. But Greg, despite his knocks, still retained some of his youthfulness and hope. He did not need to see this.
So Al Robbins stands alone over the body of Warrick Brown. A single tear escapes as he finally moves and prepares himself to make the Y incision he had prayed he would never have to make. He does not want to do it but he knows he has no choice. They need answers. They need evidence. They need two bullets lodged in their friend.
He does it for Grissom, for Catherine, for Sara and Greg. He does it for Nick whose cries of anguish and horror he can still hear and believes he will never forget.
He raises a hand and wipes away the tear. He whispers a sorry, a prayer and a hope. He does what he is trained to do. He raises his knife. He does it for Warrick.
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